Starting Over From Zero
I had to start all over again, every last stat wiped clean. I'd survived a long, grueling survival show and clawed my way into the debut lineup — only for everything I'd built to vanish not long after.
How did I feel right now?
Honestly? I wanted to die.
"Haha..."
I decided to think of it as a complete fresh start. I wasn't an optimistic person by nature, but if I didn't force myself to look on the bright side right now, I wasn't sure I could even keep breathing.
Knock, knock.
"...Yeah? What is it?"
I was lying in bed when I heard the knock. I barely lifted my head to look — Won Ji-an was standing in the doorway, holding a black plastic bag like he'd just come back from the convenience store down the street.
"Eat this. I bought it so you'd feel better."
Not that I had any appetite.
"Thanks. Just leave it there."
Still, Won Ji-an was the only person who knew what I was going through and actually looked out for me. The other members had no idea. They didn't even know the System existed, and it wasn't like I could tell anyone...
"I'm fine. Think of it this way — I'm just grinding a character from scratch again."
Time was tight, but it wasn't like there was none left before debut.
What's the worst that can happen? I'll just treat it like cramming.
Cramming. Something I'd never done once in my entire life. I'd always thought that was for idiots who put off today's work until tomorrow. And yet here I was, about to cram — even though I'd never put anything off.
Nothing I can do about it.
Life was full of things you couldn't control and moments you never saw coming. I'd accepted that a long time ago.
I can do this.
I muttered it to myself and took a bite of the biscuit Won Ji-an had bought.
It didn't taste like anything.
I headed to the practice room first thing in the morning to work on the choreography for our debut song. I'd gotten there well before the scheduled time and started practicing on my own — almost three hours early. After stretching in front of the mirror, I got down to business.
"Wow."
I'd known it already, but this was the moment it truly hit me: the System had stripped away every last one of my stats. The me in the mirror had become, quite literally, a clumsy wreck. It felt like I'd been sent right back to the first day of the possession.
"Hahaha..."
I stopped mid-dance as reality came crashing down on me.
Wow. What the hell am I supposed to do now?
My dancing and singing had reverted to their initial stats, and I didn't even have buffs anymore. I'd sworn I could do this, but standing in front of this brutal reality, my will crumbled. For the first time, I genuinely wanted to cry.
But I couldn't fall apart. I pulled myself together and drilled the same basic movements over and over. I wanted to prove I could do this even without the System. Whatever that bastard had taken from me, I'd just build it back up myself.
"Hoo... hoo..."
Before I knew it, three hours had passed. When official practice time rolled around, the members started filing into the practice room.
"Won-woo, you got here early to practice. Looks like you've been working pretty hard."
Kwon Hak-jin gave me an impressed thumbs-up. A few of the members who came in after him tossed out comments as they walked past.
"He's dedicated, huh?"
"Right? He got here way before practice even started."
"Whoa, Won-woo hyung. That's amazing!"
I brushed off my knees and stood up. They could say that because they didn't know. They had no idea how far my dancing had deteriorated. Only Won Ji-an, the one person who knew the truth, looked worried.
"You okay? We can keep going with practice, right?"
"Yeah. I'm fine."
Maybe it was because I was still young, but physically I was fine. The System had only taken my stats — my stamina was still intact.
"Alright, let's get started."
Today's practice was just us, no performance director. Maybe that was why the atmosphere was more relaxed. Reviewing the overall choreography fell to Kwon Hak-jin. We ran through the routine together once, then checked the footage on the tablet.
"Hmm."
Kwon Hak-jin's expression grew darker as he watched the video.
Ah...
Even I could see it — I stood out the most. Center or corner, it didn't matter. I was the most noticeable person in the frame. Because I was dancing so badly.
"Won-woo...?"
The look in his eyes asked if I was really okay. Every member watching the video turned to look at me at once.
"Haha."
I tried to laugh it off, but the laugh wouldn't come. Even I wanted to sigh at my own dancing. No — a sigh would've been a mercy.
"You must've been practicing way before we got here. You're just tired, right?"
Kwon Hak-jin seemed to think this unbelievable drop in my dancing was just a temporary thing. After all, this was nowhere near my usual skill level.
"Yeah, that must be it."
I had nothing to say, so I just went along with it.
"Come on, hyung. You must've been really exhausted. Hahaha! But still, this is a bit much."
Na Jae-hyun gave my shoulder a playful shove, trying to lighten the mood. But honestly, my mind was a mess trying to figure out how to handle this. Because this wasn't temporary. I'd have to keep practicing with the members at this skill level all the way until debut.
"......?"
As time passed, the members' expressions shifted. They'd tried to brush it off at first, like it was no big deal. The more we ran through the choreography and rewatched the footage, the stiffer Kwon Hak-jin's face became. The others were the same. Their faces all said, Is this for real?
"......"
"......"
I stood off to the side, well away from the members reviewing the practice footage, like someone who'd committed a crime.
"So... Won-woo?"
Kwon Hak-jin spoke carefully, reading the room.
"This is a little weird, don't you think? No matter how I look at it."
A little weird. It was a lot more than a little weird. But coming from someone as kind as Kwon Hak-jin, even wording that mild carried a meaning the members couldn't miss.
"What's going on with you?"
Kang In-hyeok was staring at me too, breathing hard, equally unable to make sense of it. For the record, the heavy breathing wasn't from anger — he'd just been dancing intensely, so he was out of breath. But combined with his naturally intimidating face and the way he was panting, it somehow created a genuinely scary atmosphere.
"I'm sorry."
It wasn't my fault, but it was something I was sorry for.
"What are you sorry for?"
That was when Han I-jae, who'd been watching quietly, stepped in.
"You just have to do it well. What's your problem? Are you slacking off on purpose?"
Lee Hae-won, reading the tension, carefully chimed in from the side.
"This isn't a hidden camera prank, is it?"
Lee Hyo-seop and Jeong Hui-min, standing side by side, both grimaced.
"Come on, what are you even saying."
"What kind of hidden camera prank would this even be? Give me a break."
Yeah. I wished it were a prank too.
"I'm not doing this on purpose."
"Then why? It's not like your skills suddenly deteriorated, right?"
They actually had.
"Did you change? Like you don't think you need to work hard anymore?"
Han I-jae looked enormously disappointed as he asked. We'd practiced over and over, and nothing improved — I just kept dancing like a mess. I'd be pissed too if I were him.
According to his character profile, Han I-jae was the type who utterly despised people without skill. So this reaction wasn't surprising. But his emotion right now wasn't quite anger — it sat somewhere on the border between fury and sheer bewilderment. After all, I hadn't originally been a bad dancer.
Does he think I've lost my drive? That I'm not trying anymore?
Logically speaking, if someone who'd been dancing just fine until recently suddenly started dancing like garbage, you'd assume their attitude had changed — not that their actual skill had deteriorated. Han I-jae's thinking came from a perfectly reasonable place. But the System wasn't a reasonable entity. It didn't even behave reasonably...
"Say something."
But right now, the person who'd lost all sense of reason was me. The delinquent idol who'd lost his beginner spirit the moment the debut team was formed.
"...I don't know why I'm like this either, all of a sudden. Maybe I'm just nervous because debut is coming up."
Han I-jae's face twisted at my pathetic excuse. As the atmosphere turned ugly, Kwon Hak-jin stepped between us, trying to intervene.
"Alright, alright, that's enough."
Behind him, Won Ji-an was looking at me with pity in his eyes.
"Yeah. Everyone knows Won-woo is normally great at this. He's just been extra tense lately, that's all."
Practice continued in a somewhat subdued atmosphere, with the members constantly glancing between me and Han I-jae. By this point, Kwon Hak-jin had given up saying anything about me and started only pointing out issues with everyone else.
Time passed, and practice somehow came to an end. The members got ready to leave, looking like they didn't know what to do with themselves.
"Hey."
A voice called me from behind. I turned around — it was Han I-jae.
"Come outside for a second."
We left the practice room and headed up to the rooftop so Han I-jae and I could talk alone.
Doesn't this kind of scene show up all the time in coming-of-age stories? "Follow me to the rooftop," and all that...
A lot of thoughts ran through my head as I followed behind Han I-jae. I'd already embarrassed myself every way there was — nothing left to be ashamed of now. Then another thought occurred to me.
Did the original Do Won-woo always feel like this?
Had he spent every day receiving those looks of disgust from the other trainees, stuck with cursed talent that never improved no matter how hard he tried? As the villain whose very existence had become an embarrassment, a nuisance, and a punchline.
Click.
Han I-jae opened the rooftop door, stepped through, and turned to face me.
"Do Won-woo."
"......"
"What's going on with you?"
The look on Han I-jae's face as he stared at me. He was frowning like something was stuck in his chest, but there was a hint of worry in his eyes.
"You're not dumb enough to lose your drive at a time like this, are you?"
"......"
"You got to the practice room earlier than anyone today and were already working. So it's not like you're phoning it in."
Han I-jae looked like he simply couldn't understand me.
"What is it, then? Why are you doing this? Are you trying to get attention?"
Trying to get attention?
"Haha..."
He'd gone past trying to understand me and started treating me like an attention-seeker.
"I'm sorry. My body's just been acting weird. I can't even explain it myself..."
"What, is there some disease that suddenly makes you unable to dance? Then shouldn't you seriously go to a hospital?"
First I was a delinquent who'd lost his drive before even debuting, then an attention-seeker, and now I was being suspected of being a patient.
"I'll get back to my original form as fast as I can. Just give me a little time."
Han I-jae scratched his head, then sighed. He couldn't fully accept it, but he seemed to recognize that I was dealing with some kind of problem.
"Debut is right around the corner. You know your current skill level isn't normal, right?"
"Yes."
"You'd better get back to your original form as soon as possible, like you said. At this rate, you'll be a laughingstock the moment we debut."
I nodded.
"I'll make it work somehow by debut."