Chapter 6: The First Shoot (2)
Chapter 6: The First Shoot (2)
To be honest, it felt pretty good at first.
Unlike how nervous I’d been, my body didn't tremble and did its job well.
‘I even have a cheat sheet this time.’
The commercial I had seen in my past life came back to me with startling clarity.
The performance Kim Jung-ha had given back then, and the acting of Lee Ji-yeon—who was a child actor at the time—flashed before my eyes as if etched onto my retinas.
I can do this.
With this, there shouldn't be any problems.
I was thinking optimistically like that, but...
‘...Something’s missing. It lacks flavor.’
The girl captured on camera was incredibly cheerful and full of life, unlike my usual self.
And yet, the image of "Ju Seo-yeon" was still visible.
This meant that my RP—my acting—wasn't quite right.
‘What’s the problem?’
In truth, no matter how much I pondered it, there was no way for me to know.
I had never formally learned how to act; all I’d done was follow along with children's shows while doing morning stretches.
I had acted out characters in my imagination before, but I had never recorded myself and checked it like this.
"Hmm..."
The director, Jo Min-tae, also had a worried expression.
"Actually, we could just go with this."
That was his response when I asked to shoot again.
"To be honest, it’s not like there’s a major problem. Right?"
"Ah, yes."
"I honestly don't see what the issue is."
"It’s just... there’s a slight sense of dissonance."
It was a comment tossed out thoughtlessly by one of the staff members, but the words struck a chord in my heart.
Dissonance.
‘Yes, that’s it. There’s a sense of dissonance.’
But why?
As I continued to stare intently at the footage, someone tapped me on the shoulder.
"Ms. Kim Jung-ha?"
"Um... you know..."
She seemed to be hesitating, as if wondering whether she should speak or not. Her attitude was like someone asking, 'Do I even have the right to say something like this?'
In fact, several staff members shook their heads while looking at Kim Jung-ha.
Her acting had been good this time, but it was likely because she had consistently shown poor performance until now. To them, she probably looked like she was acting high and mighty, giving advice just because she got it right once.
But I knew.
Kim Jung-ha was a future ten-million-ticket actress.
She was an actress with talent recognized by ten million viewers.
"Ms. Kim Jung-ha."
"...Yes?"
"I've never actually learned how to act properly."
Kim Jung-ha blinked at my words. Looking into her eyes, I wondered if she might have taken my statement as a humblebrag.
"So, naturally, I have many shortcomings. If you notice anything strange, I really want you to tell me."
There was something I realized during my corporate life.
If you don't know, just ask.
Of course, that saying didn't really apply to actual office life.
If you don't know, put in the effort to figure it out yourself.
That was the phrase I heard most often from that bastard Manager Kim.
‘But the Kim Jung-ha in front of me isn't Manager Kim.’
Well, they shared the same surname, but at least Kim Jung-ha wasn't the type to respond to a question with a shout.
Even though she was a bit timid, she had been trying to tell me something.
She wasn't stupid.
Since she had been struggling with her acting for so long, she must have known that speaking up first would only invite ridicule.
And yet.
Even so.
She had tried to tell me.
So, I wanted to hear her answer.
"...This is, really... just my personal opinion."
Perhaps my sincerity reached her, as Kim Jung-ha spoke haltingly.
"Seo-yeon, your emotional acting is amazing. Even though you're so young, it's incredible. Honestly, I couldn't even dream of imitating it."
She pointed to the playing video with a trembling hand.
"But emotional acting alone can't convey everything through a small TV screen."
My eyes widened at her words.
‘Ah.’
I see.
I understood what she was trying to say.
Jo Min-tae also let out a small exclamation of admiration at Kim Jung-ha's remark.
"Ah, that's right. Yes, that's exactly it. Seo-yeon, you said you've never learned acting before, right?"
"...Yes."
"I see. You haven't. That's why it shows like this."
I felt a bit embarrassed by those words. I felt like a clueless fool who had recklessly jumped into a job without knowing anything.
‘Acting isn't just about emotions.’
And honestly, the emotional acting that everyone was marveling at didn't really resonate with me.
Was it because I was the one doing it?
Or was there something wrong with me?
Regardless, I could see the problem now.
‘Gestures.’
Acting isn't solved by emotion alone.
The tone and pitch of the lines.
The actions and movements linked to them.
All of those combined are expressed as acting.
I had only acted through pure emotion and the movements left in my memory.
And those movements belonged to Lee Ji-yeon, the child actor from my past life.
Naturally, they didn't fit me.
Taken separately, it might look like skilled acting, but it wasn't perfectly my acting.
‘But...’
I hadn't really practiced using my body much.
"...If it's okay, would you like me to show you a bit? I'm... actually a little confident in this."
Kim Jung-ha said hesitantly.
This was the ten-million-ticket actress Kim Jung-ha speaking.
For me, it was an offer I absolutely had to accept.
"Of course. I'd actually be very grateful if you could teach me."
Emotional acting is the most powerful weapon on the big screen.
Because the screen that fills your vision, the audio, and the music move people's emotions most significantly.
However, on a TV or a small computer screen, that impact is noticeably less than in a cinema.
Therefore, what compensates for that is 'visual acting.'
"So, over here, like this..."
Even though we had to reshoot, the staff didn't complain.
They simply watched Kim Jung-ha as she taught me various movements, and they watched me in silence.
One hour passed.
Then two.
"Alright, let's start filming again!"
It was only when evening approached that the shoot finally resumed.
Standing on the set with Kim Jung-ha again, my body felt strangely shaky.
Nervousness. And anxiety.
Emotions I hadn't felt during the audition washed over me.
‘Can I do this?’
I didn't know.
To be honest, what I had just learned wasn't even the basics.
It was just a quick fix specifically for this CF.
‘Still.’
I looked at the camera.
I saw Jo Min-tae's mouth move to give the cue sign.
And then.
"...Director Jo."
"Yes?"
"I think the advertiser is the only one getting a massive bargain here. This is unbelievable, seriously."
That was how my first shoot ended.
*
"Waaah, Mommy, you said I was going to get it."
"Ji-yeon, honey. You don't need to worry about it too much. It's not like that was the only audition."
"But still...!"
Hong Jin-hee sighed at the sight of her daughter, whose confidence had plummeted after failing the audition.
It had already been a few months.
‘Ugh, I wonder who actually got that part.’
Hong Jin-hee grumbled, but she had a child in mind.
The girl who had been sitting there with a bored expression.
She remembered the child who had remained quiet and calm while all the other children were nervous.
‘It must be her. It was probably rigged from the start.’
That’s why she wasn't nervous.
‘I’ve heard that happens sometimes... ugh, it’s so frustrating.’
There were cases where auditions were held even though someone had already been pre-selected.
Hong Jin-hee believed her daughter had failed for that very reason.
Her face was... well, she was a very cute child, so she must have gotten it based on her looks alone!
Hong Jin-hee comforted her daughter with that thought.
"My pretty daughter. You're going to kindergarten soon, so stop crying!"
"Hmph."
"Look, it's time for Ppiniping, your favorite."
Beep. She turned on the TV to soothe the child.
She thought her daughter was quite something for whining every time she remembered something from months ago.
"Huh?"
While waiting for Ppiniping to air, a commercial came on.
"Mommy."
"Yes?"
"I think I've seen her before."
Hong Jin-hee nodded at her daughter's words.
She had been thinking the exact same thing.
It was a soy milk commercial.
A commercial for a new brand of soy milk she had never heard of.
「Unnie! Is this milk?」
The commercial began with a long-haired girl whining.
Then, a cheerful-looking woman appeared, wagging her finger.
「No way~. It's soy milk Unnie bought for her little sister.」
「Soy milk?」
The girl held the soy milk, squeezed her eyes shut, and took a long sip through the straw.
The way she stole glances at her older sister was incredibly cute.
「Wow! It's sweet!」
Then, the color palette shifted, and the girl's face brightened up.
The sight of her bouncing around cheerfully while walking made it impossible to take one's eyes off her cuteness.
Amidst the brightened colors, she hopped around with light, rhythmic steps.
In between, the benefits of the soy milk were naturally displayed, and close-ups of the girl's face enjoying it were shown.
Pop!
It was a commercial with very strong colors that could have easily looked cluttered.
However, the lead woman and the little girl didn't make it feel that way at all.
The girl's arms moving rhythmically.
The way she skipped along, arm-in-arm with her older sister.
The words 'Pure Soy Milk' were stamped at the end.
"Mommy."
When she snapped out of it, her daughter Ji-yeon was tugging at her sleeve.
Judging by the child's pouting face, she had probably been calling her for a while.
‘So that’s why.’
Hong Jin-hee thought.
If her own daughter had been in that position...
‘That’s why she failed.’
Even though her daughter was the apple of her eye, she didn't think Ji-yeon could ever perform like that girl.
*
I was exhausted.
It was because my mom had dragged me out early in the morning.
"Mom, I have low blood pressure..."
"Oh, what are you talking about? You don't have anything like that, Seo-yeon."
Well, that was true.
But in my past life, I had terrible low blood pressure, so I never liked moving around in the morning.
"And Seo-yeon, you're going to kindergarten soon, so you need to get into the habit of waking up early."
"Kindergarten..."
Just hearing the name made me not want to go.
What a useless and bothersome place.
Ju Seo-yeon, six years old.
It was the age where I started wishing time would pass faster.
I’d rather redo middle or high school; at least that might be interesting.
But kindergarten is a bit much.
"Mom, you don't have to rush so much."
Anyway, I rubbed my eyes and spoke to my mom.
My mom, Sua, frowned as if she couldn't believe what I was saying.
"I was planning to leave even earlier. If only my beautiful daughter hadn't been snoring away until the sun was high in the sky."
"..."
Well, okay. I could understand why Mom was being so pushy.
She had been like this since yesterday.
‘To be precise, ever since she saw the CF yesterday.’
Yesterday was the first day the CF we shot months ago aired.
Mom, who had been waiting for it, even recorded it and carefully kept the footage.
She even hugged me so tight, saying her daughter was a genius, that I almost suffocated in her large chest.
‘There should be plenty left anyway.’
The soy milk from Garam Dream, 'Pure Soy Milk,' was just a mediocre product.
Originally, it was something sold at a discount, and it only sold moderately well even after Kim Jung-ha filmed the commercial.
‘I mean, how much soy milk do people actually buy?’
Besides, the local mart was quite large, so they should have plenty of stock.
Or so I thought.
"...It's all sold out?"
"It's not just sold out; it was gone by this morning. If I'd known, I would have ordered a lot more."
At the mart clerk's regretful words, Mom's eyes turned toward me.
I slowly turned my head away from her gaze, which was filled with deep resentment.
I never dreamed it would actually be sold out.