20. Like Spring Sun
Why are you angry? — Sugar was bewildered.
She had told a friend that she didn’t like blondes, but another girl showed up and got all worked up.
Moreover, that girl wasn’t even blonde. Her hair was faded, dry, a muddy brown color, thick with dirt and grime.
Among the people she knew, was there anyone with blonde hair? Had her parents been blonde once?
“What exactly do you dislike? Since when? Why?”
From the beginning? That a guy who could kill her in the future was blonde and she hated it? She couldn’t say something like that.
She had no particular grudge against blondes in the first place. As she’d said earlier, there were plenty of blonde-haired characters she liked.
It was just a careless remark that slipped out because of Ryly.
She hadn’t hated blondes from the start. In her previous life, she hadn’t felt this way toward Ryly.
Back then, this world had been nothing but a game, and he had been nothing but the villain of that world. It was completely different from the reality they lived in now.
Since she couldn’t explain all these circumstances in detail, Sugar decided to simply become a blonde-hating person.
“It’s just a preference.”
“…”
She turned around with a sharp motion. Her fists were clenched, and she looked displeased.
“… I don’t like that kind of dirty, strange hair color either.”
She spat it out in a voice full of disgust and then dashed into the building.
“… You came all this way just to say that?”
“I don’t think so…”
Frallin’s reply only made her shrug her shoulders.
***
She had only come to discuss what had happened at the orphanage.
But the boy who overheard her dislike had hidden himself in a corner of the attic.
It was the same hair color as her own mother, whom she hated with all her heart.
It was the hair color she had hidden before escaping the slums. The color she wanted to keep hidden until she could stand proudly and without shame.
She had covered it with dirt because she wanted to disappear from the world.
Being denied such a scarred color so simply made her heart strange. She didn’t know how to express this strange feeling of displeasure.
Was she angry? Was she irritated? Both were true, but the word “it hurts” fit better.
The first thought that came to mind was “why?”
Why would she have to feel hurt after hearing something like that from a girl?
She imagined hearing the same words from someone else. For example, from Frallin or other children.
“… It’s a bit irritating, but it doesn’t matter.”
She could just ignore it. She didn’t care what they said.
She recalled the incident from just now.
-It’s just that I personally don’t like that color.
-It’s just a preference.
Her displeasure grew rapidly. The feeling of being denied by herself was unbearably painful.
Why? Why did Sugar’s words hurt so much? Why did they pierce like a dagger? The more she mulled it over, the more irritated she became.
The tormented boy covered his eyes.
He did it because he didn’t want to think any deeper. If he realized the reason for the pain, he might never be able to come back.
The boy turned his gaze and raised his hand. A book appeared from nowhere where there had been nothing.
The best way to stop thinking was to focus on something else.
The boy liked acquiring new knowledge, so he decided to read the book to cheer himself up.
“…”
After a while, he closed the book.
Of course. Since meeting Sugar, not a single page had been turned.
The grimoire that restored pages with the life force of living beings had stopped interpreting the spells.
Looking at it made him feel even more depressed for another reason. He willed the book to disappear again.
Then he flopped down on the floor.
The light leaking from the small window was dim, giving a strange sense of unreality. His blue eyes, which had lost their shine, stared blankly into the darkness.
If he kept staring without thinking, it felt as if he himself had become the darkness and the darkness had become him.
He stayed like that for a long time.
“…”
-Tadadada.
Suddenly, the floor below became noisy. Someone was running. It sounded like someone was shouting loudly.
Usually, the person causing such a commotion was almost always a girl, so the boy instinctively stood up. An inexplicable throbbing beat in his chest.
“Tommy! Where’s Tommy!?”
The voice calling him. Unfortunately, it wasn’t the voice he had been hoping for. It wasn’t the clear, honey-like voice he wanted. It was the shrill voice of a middle-aged auntie.
Still, he went down to the attic as if expecting something.
“… Here.”
“Ah! There you were! I, um, first, prepare… shower! Clothes! Prepare!”
What was she saying? The orphanage director’s rambling made her expression sour, and a heavy sensation suddenly hit him.
Something thick and sticky enveloped his whole body. It wasn’t something caused by the floor he had been kicking earlier.
It was caused by someone’s magic power.
-Thud, thud.
Even though he had only heard it once today, the familiar sound of a cane echoed.
“Director. You don’t have to prepare like that. As you can see, my eyes are like this, so appearance has no meaning.”
“W-well… but manners…”
“It’s really fine. I only came to talk briefly today, so you don’t have to worry.”
“… Understood. Then I’ll guide you to the reception room.”
“Oh my, how kind.”
She smiled kindly.
She was spewing heavy magic power as if announcing her presence, yet by now even Sugar in the backyard would know about Rubshi’s existence.
“Come quickly… Tommy… right? Nice to meet you.”
Tommy stared silently at the woman who had come from the shadows.
***
The scent of tea was good.
Uncharacteristically for the orphanage director, she had brought fine tea. Normally she drank cheap tea, but when a valuable guest came, she served proper tea. She was a person with standards.
“…”
“…”
The two sitting in the reception room stayed silent for a while.
They weren’t speaking, but their magic powers were clashing fiercely. To be precise, Rubshi was trying to envelop Tommy, while Tommy was trying to repel her. The displeasure had reached its peak, so his expression was to be expected.
Feeling the other’s magic power made him feel an immediate revulsion. It was normal to resist. Sugar’s magic power was strangely harmonious.
“… Stop it. What exactly are you here for?”
“It’s like a greeting. I wanted to check your abilities too.”
“Hah. Is my goal this time?”
“Yes. Last time Sugar’s reaction was so stubborn that I thought even if I said a friend was coming, her heart might soften.”
“Get lost.”
Her immediate reply made Rubshi smile.
“Tommy. If I were to adopt you, do you know what you could do?”
“… What?”
“Orphans have no right to refuse. Even if you run away, once I’ve observed you, I can chase you down.”
“You…!”
“Or, while you’re running away, I could take Sugar with me. There are many spells that don’t violate the promise not to harm her. If you weren’t there to defend yourself, I could take her however I want.”
This was too powerless—Tommy muttered under his breath. He immediately raised his hand. The words were too childish and directly scratching at his insides, filling him with rage.
You’re powerless. You can’t do anything. The most hated words made the young boy unable to think rationally. Rational thought was impossible.
Just as he was about to pull out the grimoire.
-Sarak...
A white something was wriggling in his peripheral vision.
It was a short moment that felt like a hallucination.
A pinkish-white gradient subtly mixed into white. The hair that had appeared outside the reception room window was that color he liked.
“… Hoo.”
Tommy, whose flow had been broken, took a deep breath. Only then did he regain his senses. He realized what he had been about to do and his head was in chaos.
“Ah… What a waste. I thought I could see it once.”
“… What?”
“What you’re hiding. I thought if I made you angry, you would reveal it.”
Seeing that mischievous smile felt like ten years had passed.
If he had pulled out the grimoire like that. If he had shown his power. No matter what the result, he wouldn’t be able to stay in this orphanage anymore.
Tommy, who had no such thoughts yet, crossed his arms with empty hands.
“What am I hiding?”
“I don’t know. I know there’s something, but I can’t figure out what it is. You hid it in a way I couldn’t notice…”
Rubshi made a circle with her hand and pressed it to her eye, then straightened her posture again.
“I apologize for my words just now. If I made you upset, I’m sorry. As I said before, I won’t force you to do anything you dislike. I don’t even have the ability to do so.”
“You’re sorry if you scratch people and then get upset? If you knew, get lost.”
“I’m sorry. My curiosity got the better of me and I made a mistake.”
Rubshi laughed aloud and took a sip of tea. She had said that, but showed no regret for her actions.
“Then shall we get to the main point?”
“I don’t want to.”
“Please listen once. It’s not a bad deal for you either. I brought quite realistic conditions.”
She took out a long wooden box from the paper bag she had been holding the whole time.
She placed it casually on the table.
“I acted like I was dealing with a young child before. This time, I’ve raised my level.”
“…”
“Please open it. There’s nothing bad in it.”
“You open it.”
“Kids these days are all so bold…” Rubshi, who didn’t know the cause was herself, untied the string of the wooden box.
“Well, how is it?”
Upon seeing the contents, he felt as if his breath had stopped.
It was because the thing was surprising. He was surprised that she would do something to make people angry like this.
The shock made blood rush to his head and his vision spin.
“You… are a magician… what does this mean…”
“Of course I know. It doesn’t seem like a bad deal for you. Tommy, how long will you stay here?”
“…”
“I’ve been active as an apostle for many years. I was once affiliated with the Floating Island. I’m telling you this as someone who has experienced a lot. You have exceptional talent. Even though you’re young, your knowledge of magic is deep. But it’s difficult to wield that light in the slums. I don’t think you have confidence that you’ll succeed. But I can guide you.”
“…”
“I can personally guide you. There are many other mages, so you can receive help from them. To receive that, all you have to do is believe in us and stay with us. Then you’ll receive guidance and support.”
Tommy, the boy, chose his words calmly.
To avoid being swept away by anger like before. Even so, his throat burned with the rising heat and breathing was difficult.
“What kind of support can you give me?”
“As far as my reach extends.”
“What position did you reach on the Floating Island?”
“I can tell you if you ask. I’m embarrassed to say it myself, but if I tell you the whereabouts of that traitor right away, it will cause a commotion.”
“… Anyway, it means you didn’t reach the top floor.”
“That’s true, but the top floor—”
“I want first place.”
And the boy who raised his head had eyes that were hard to see as those of a child.
Something sharp and filled with obsession. It burned quietly and clearly.
“What I want more than anyone, ‘the absolute best.’ ‘The highest.’ ‘The greatest.’ No one should look down on me. I want everyone to look up to me and envy me. I want them not to dare challenge me or answer back…”
“… You have quite a bit of pride.”
“Yes! But useless guidance? Useless support? If it’s something anyone can do, I don’t need it! Throw this away! How… how much did you look down on me!”
The box that the boy pushed away roughly fell with a clatter.
What shot out from it was a glossy gray magic staff.
The staff was a gift from parents to children and from teachers to disciples. There was no fixed principle, but it was a common practice for ordinary mages.
However, for Tommy, for this young boy…
… Ryly had no proper parents or teachers.
That had always been a wound, a sense of inferiority, and the beginning of all the twists in any world.
A proper family. A normal life.
He wanted to reach that which he always envied but could never touch.
Instead, he changed his thoughts to gaining recognition from everyone and the world.
That kind of child was given a staff like a blessing, which only further damaged his pride.
“Get lost right now!”
“…”
She said it sharply, like sharpening thorns. Even if she got angry like this, it wouldn’t improve her mood. It would only make her more miserable.
The boy, tasting the bitter emotion, ground his teeth. The woman smiled mysteriously without saying anything.
The atmosphere in the reception room was cool.
Colder than cool. It was chillingly cold.
“—Yes. Get lost right now.”
But here, there was something that melted that space like spring sunlight.
A girl who led a fate completely different from any world.
A magic-like child.
She had sat by the window, and her appearance was like a dream. Her light steps landing lightly were like those of a fairy.
That girl ran to the boy’s side. With a warm air filled with unspoken affection, she came to this place as if she would hug him.
“Bad humans who bully my friend. That’s you, Rubshi.”
Sugar hid Tommy behind her and glared at Rubshi with a pretend angry face.