Lingering Resentment
There had been a brief, awkward moment, but thanks to Helena opening the door, we made it into her interrogation room without further incident.
Of course, even if she hadn't opened it, we could have gotten in with Gyu-jin's help, or the senior agent's. Still, when someone is already inside, it's only polite to defer to their wishes first, isn't it?
I may no longer be human, but I still understand that much etiquette.
"......Come in."
Helena faced us with a complicated expression and let us into the room.
Gyu-jin and the senior agent, who had overheard that exchange, stood blankly outside for a beat before trailing in after me, looking distinctly uncomfortable. I paid them no mind and perched myself on Helena's bed as comfortably as if it were my own room.
This much isn't a breach of manners, is it?
"How did you know about me, Helena?"
I offered a playfully light little gesture, so the question shouldn't have sounded too heavy. I was asking out of genuine curiosity—but depending on the listener, it could come across as prying.
"Do you take me for a fool? I knew I was supposed to die. When the bandits attacked, my parents and I were all shot. But I opened my eyes without a single wound—even though the bloodstains on my clothes were still vivid."
Fortunately, Helena didn't take the question that seriously. There was a hint of wry humor in her voice, which let me keep things light as well.
"Mm, that's true. Anyone looking at you then would have said you had no chance of surviving. Not many people walk away from a bullet through the heart."
"I thought I'd made a contract with a demon as I was dying. I begged them to send those bandits straight to hell. I said I'd sell my soul if that was what it took. So I assumed some strange power had taken root in me."
"Strange power?"
That was an odd thing to say. All I had done was save Helena's life. She hadn't started breathing fire or calling up the wind. She'd just shot the bandits, put a chair through a few of them, and done a bit of work with a blade.
Ah—was she calling her marksmanship an ability? But that wasn't strange enough to qualify. Whether it's a bow or a gun, sharpshooters exist everywhere in the world. Rare, sure—but not uncanny.
"Yes. So I went around to churches here and there and asked if I was possessed by a demon. And that was where I learned of your existence, Yeonmin. They said a demon had tried to give me a talent and take something from me in return, but your blessing kept it from succeeding."
"A blessing? From me?"
This was genuinely out of left field. All I had done was heal Helena's wounds. Well—there had been a few small bits of help here and there, but those could easily be written off as coincidence, couldn't they?
"After that, I heard rumors about you everywhere. That you give a second chance to those dying unjustly. That you ask for nothing in return—you simply grant the chance and leave. They said even demons refuse to touch anyone your hand has reached, and they leave them alone. And since you demanded nothing of me until I finished my revenge, I knew it had to have been you who saved me, Yeonmin."
There seemed to be some kind of misunderstanding. It wasn't that I had demons under my thumb—we simply never had any dealings. How had a reputation like that even formed?
In any case, she didn't seem to be looking for an answer. Helena went on as if reciting a monologue, her voice growing darker with every word.
"I won't ask why. But once I'd finished every last bit of my revenge, I found I hated the world. It may sound shameless coming from someone you brought back to life, Yeonmin—but I resented you. If you had the power to save me like that, couldn't you have kept my mother and father from dying in the first place?"
That one pierced me right in the chest.
Because it was true that I had revived people like Helena simply because I wanted to watch an interesting story. Looked at another way, I had just stood by and let things get that bad. For the sake of entertainment.
It was only natural she would think preventing death would have been better than bringing someone back after the fact. And that made me think of all the girls I had revived over the years. Stories of girls who rose from adversity, weathered every hardship and trial, and finally seized happiness—those were only enjoyable from the audience's seat. For the people living them, it would have been far happier never to have known that misfortune at all, rather than growing through it.
And so I offered an excuse that wasn't quite an excuse.
"I'm not omnipotent. You were simply dying, Helena, and you happened to catch my eye. And I find it difficult to grant a wish that no one is actually asking for."
Of course, what Helena had wanted wasn't impossible. When they were traveling by carriage, her parents would have prayed for safety. If I had granted that, I wouldn't even have needed to use my power—just answering the wish would have given Helena the happy days she wanted.
But ironically, at the time, Helena had been nothing more than one girl among countless others. There was no reason I would have taken an interest in a child like that.
It was a kind of dilemma. I felt this guilt now precisely because I had saved her. And if I granted every wish for safety from every person in that world... that would be a crude story of my own making, not the brilliant lives they were carving out for themselves.
Helena listened to my excuse and hung her head. Had it been a convincing one?
"......You don't have to make excuses. The truth is, I should be grateful just for being saved. What I found so disgusting was myself—for blaming you anyway. There was nothing left. So I tried to die. There was nothing left to live for. And then you, Yeonmin—you brought me back to life again."
Ah. So that was why she had tried to kill herself.
Her will had been too strong, and it had become a poison. If Helena had been even a little weaker, she would have given up on suicide and somehow gone on living. But she was too steadfast. Once she had decided to die, she simply went and did it.
"Yeonmin. What do you want me to do? Is there something you want from me? Why won't you even let me die? Why won't you let me go see my mother and father?"
As she spoke, her emotions seemed to surge. Helena's voice rose, turning accusatory. Having become a weight on her heart, I naturally couldn't leave that unanswered.
"I want you to live, Helena. Happily. The Helena of that other world died completely, so you had no choice but to cross over here like this... Couldn't you think of it as being born anew, and try living again?"
"......So that's why they make those who reincarnate cross the river of forgetfulness. To live a new life, even the memories have to be wiped clean."
Even after my earnest plea, Helena's attitude remained negative.
Was I truly unable to soften her heart? To say time would heal her felt hollow—her heart must already have been reduced to ash. She had spent the last ten years burning everything to complete her revenge. A person like that doesn't change easily.
......Even setting aside my wish that an interesting story end with a happy ending—deep down, I had grown fond of Helena, and I wanted her to live a long, happy life. As things stood, I was starting to regret my choice, just a little.
Should I have just let her die the way she wanted?
"By the way, Yeonmin. Why are you tied up in such a lewd fashion? Are the people here doing something to you? I can't imagine human bindings would have any effect on you. Don't tell me they're trying to imprison a god?"
Just as I was about to sink into that brooding, Helena suddenly brought up my restraints.
Now that she had run into me and poured out every last bit of the resentment she had been carrying, perhaps she was finally settling down a little. At any rate, even to Helena's eyes, the bindings on me apparently looked rather suggestive. Well—they were tied in a way that emphasized my chest, and my body had a rather nice figure to begin with...
"I let them tie me up. So the humans here would feel at ease. A wolf wandering around freely is frightening, but if it's wearing a collar, people think, oh, that's someone's wolf. Something like that."
"That doesn't mean you need to be bound this tightly. It seems far too harsh. ......Don't tell me you accepted these restraints because of me? Did they take me hostage and threaten you?"
I had said it to put her at ease, but for some reason Helena's atmosphere was growing more and more menacing. I noticed her hand was slowly drifting toward her revolver.
If I left this alone, we were going to have a full-blown shooting, so I hurriedly calmed her down.
"It's nothing like that. But if I cooperate, the humans here will be kind to you as well, Helena."
"......What am I even to you."
"As I said, I want you to live a long, happy life. Even if it's in a different world like this."
Perhaps those words still carried some weight. Helena's hand stopped dead, and her expression went rigid.
"Yeonmin. Was I a special human to you?"
"Of course you were."
If she hadn't been special, I wouldn't have saved her. So I could answer that with complete honesty and confidence.
Helena stared at me blankly, then her face twisted.
"And I didn't even know... I just kept resenting you..."
Looks like some of that residue has finally loosened.
Thank goodness. I had been a little nervous myself—this was the first time I had actually sat down and talked with one of my heroines. But it seemed the conversation hadn't been bad for Helena's state of mind, and I was truly glad of that.
"It's all right. As long as you live happily, Helena, that's enough for me. Ah—I think we've been talking just between ourselves for too long. They speak a different language here. These people said they'd help us settle into this world. Since you can't speak the language here, I'll interpret for you."
So it was time to introduce the agents who had been standing there like pieces of furniture. Having me in the middle would be a bit of a hassle, but it was still better for Helena than not being able to communicate at all.
"Ah, you can just speak normally. We brought a Translation Artifact as well."
For some reason, Gyu-jin sounded rather proud of himself. Judging by his tone, he had understood our entire conversation.
"Huh? Our language systems are completely different. Translation works?"
"That's magic for you. A miracle."
Wait—reality has changed this much...?