Let's Go Conquer the Tower. (2)
One word from me, and every adult around me froze mid-step.
It felt just like the old days, when I used to cast a barrier spell over a battlefield.
“A-are you… little one, how old are you…?”
I hadn't bothered checking since I passed 3,000, you know?
But since I'd need to give my age in Earth years, showing my ID should do the trick.
Confidently, I pulled my ID out of my pocket and held it up.
Zuuuurrrrrk──!!!
The moment the woman read the number on it, she started sweating all over again.
“H-hunting might be… a little too much for someone so young, don't you think?”
“I'm not young.”
What's wrong with this age, exactly?
Back in my past life, goblins picked up weapons and fought humans when they were one year old???
“Um… little one, do you have a guardian with you?”
A guardian? Obviously not?
Ah… wait. This is a trap!!
I need to choose my words carefully here.
If I admit I have no guardian, some strange people will show up and try to lock me away 'for my own protection'!
I refuse to surrender my freedom!
“Grandma's in the hospital. I have to earn her hospital bills.”
Waaaah!!
The woman in front of me burst into tears this time instead of sweating!
Even the adults watching me from around the room were covering their eyes!
“I had no idea…”
Stroking my head, the woman managed a tender smile through glistening eyes.
“There's technically… no age limit for hunters, and children younger than you do work. Most of them have guardians with them, though…”
She scribbled something on a memo pad and handed it over along with her business card.
“When you go into the Tower, only hunt anomalies in the spots marked on this map. Never, ever go anywhere else until you're experienced. You could fall into an urban legend.”
I know that already, thank you?
Translating to my old world's terms: anomalies are monsters, and urban legends are basically gates.
And just like how wandering into the wrong gate traps you until you clear it, falling into an urban legend means surviving under its own twisted set of rules, right?
I studied plenty on the internet~!
'Love me or hate me, I ruled the world for 3,000 years as the Demon King. I have more than enough combat experience.'
“Take this. Open it when no one's around. And you can register as a hunter over there.”
After patting my head one more time, the woman walked away.
No, wait.
She pretended to leave, then hid behind a pillar off in the distance and started secretly watching me.
Seriously~!
I keep telling you, I'm not a little kid.
Tap tap tap.
I spun around and marched off in the direction the woman had pointed.
Behind me, the still-frozen adults kept watching me go.
Ahem~!
Everyone's eyes on me like this—it reminds me of the way my minions used to gaze up at me in my past life. I like it!
So I stepped into the building with the sign reading Hunter Association, and the moment I did—
“““Whew……”””
—every adult who'd been watching released a collective sigh of relief and finally went on their way.
This was the first Hunter Association I'd ever entered in my second life, and people were streaming through it in droves.
“Gwahaha~!”
“Come with me~!”
Among them I spotted kids around my apparent age, but every one of them was with a guardian.
'Hmm~ so I'm the only one here alone?'
Not that I'm young in the slightest—but thanks to the Hero's Curse, I've been turned into a squishy little girl, so appearance-wise, yes, I'm a child.
Still, there's no age limit for hunters, so registration shouldn't be a problem.
'Oh right, what was that thing she gave me?'
She'd told me to open it when no one was around, but curiosity got the better of me and I peeked inside the envelope.
'Oooooh…? What's this?'
It was tteok. Actual rice cakes.
An envelope full of that chewy rice cake I love so much.
Hmm~ now that I think about it, something this delicious might absolutely get snatched by the other kids around here!
I quickly popped a piece into my mouth and chewed.
So gooood~!
“Hm?”
Only belatedly did I notice a piece of paper hidden beneath the rice cake packaging.
Incredibly—it was cash. 100,000 won.
'Whoa! She really was a good woman!'
So that was the real reason she'd told me to open it away from other people, huh.
Hmm~ how thoughtful!
I'll guard this money with my life!
Boing~!
“Aiyah!”
Money safely stowed, I toddled off—no wait, strode off—and the moment I did, I smacked straight into a tall man who had cut into my path.
“Huh? What little brat dares to bump into m—……… What? There's nobody here?”
The tall man looked around in confusion.
Down here, genius!
“Hng… it hurts.”
Rubbing my bumped forehead, I tilted my face up—and the tall man finally spotted me and started panicking.
“Oh no… s-sorry, kiddo. I wasn't watching where I was going.”
The man crouched down in front of me and began rummaging through his pockets.
I know this maneuver well.
It's the ritual adults perform right before handing out snacks!
'What treat are you about to bestow?'
Please don't judge me for acting like a child.
I've spent a full year adapting to this squishy little girl body, after all?
Heck, I've already given up on fighting the toddler-speak the Hero's Curse forces out of me!
Humans are creatures of adaptation, aren't they?
“Aw, I've got no snacks on me.”
“Hng…”
When I let my disappointment show, the tall man grew even more flustered and hastily yanked out his wallet.
“H-here, buy yourself a snack, kiddo!”
He shoved 50,000 won into my hands and fled the scene like a man escaping a crime!
'Wow, more pocket money!'
How many bags of chips does this even buy?
I hereby formally forgive you for bumping into me!
Beaming, I toddled off once more—fine, strode off—toward the reception desk.
“I'm here to register as a hunter~.”
When I piped up from below the counter, the receptionist's eyes darted around looking for someone.
For the last time, I'm down here~!
“Oh my, a very young visitor. Where might your parents be?”
“Hm~? Mom and Dad both died a long time ago.”
Zuuuuush───!!!
At my answer, cold sweat began pouring down the receptionist's face with tremendous force!
But why does everyone keep asking about my parents' wellbeing?
“Y-y-y-your guardian… w-where, uh, where might they be?”
I don't have a guardian.
But if anyone figures out I'm alone, the state might come and cart me off.
Time to invoke the grandmothers' names!
“Grandma's in the hospital right now. Our house burned down recently.”
PSHOOOOOOSH───!!!
Cold spray burst from the receptionist's face like a waterfall!!
“I need to register as a hunter. I have to build Grandma a new house.”
“Th-th-th… I-is that so? Then we'll, uh, proceed with the standard process. Th-the registration fee is 100,000 won.”
Excuse me~?! A hundred thousand?
The info I read said 30,000?
Did I accidentally look at some ancient outdated article? Ugh…
“Hng… there goes my snack money…”
With my saddest face, I pulled out the pocket money the adults had given me earlier.
The moment the receptionist saw my expression, she clutched her heart and shouted.
“C-c-congratulations! You've won our event~!! By sheer coincidence, you happen to be the 777th hunter to register today, so your registration is completely free~!”
Ding~! Ding~! Ding~!
The receptionist rang a bell she'd produced from somewhere, celebrating me with all her might.
Good heavens—winning an event!!
In thousands of years of life, this is the first time I've ever won anything!
“Yay~! So it's free?”
“Yes~! Totally free. Would you mind waiting just a moment?”
The receptionist pulled two 50,000-won bills out of her own wallet and slipped them into the cash drawer.
Why are you storing your own money in there??
“Here—I brought you a chair.”
While I waited, the receptionist returned carrying a tall stool.
“Please have a seat here and fill out the forms.”
She lifted me up as gingerly as if handling jelly about to burst apart at any second, then set me down on the chair.
Seriously~ I could climb up on my own, you know.
“Now, write your name here. Would you like me to write it for you?”
I'm the Demon King, you know~?
After a year living here, I've mastered the local script!
Well… the Hero's Curse apparently came with a local-language function built in, so technically I could use it from day one.
“I can manage this much myself.”
“Aren't you clever~.”
Pat pat pat.
The receptionist patted my head as though I'd just achieved something grand.
Aigoo~!
Now my handwriting's going to come out all wobbly, isn't it~!
Once I'd diligently filled out every field on the form, the receptionist went back around the counter and began the registration process.
“There we go~ your fee has been paid and your paperwork is all submitted.”
“Wasn't the fee free because of the event?”
“S-s-s-slip of the tongue! Of course~ it was all processed free of charge~!”
The receptionist fumbled about doing this and that, then suddenly produced a camera.
“If you didn't happen to bring a photo for submission, may I take one for you?”
“Yeah, go ahead.”
“Thank you!”
Why are you thanking me?
Clickclickclickclick!!
Why are you taking so many photos…???
“Hehehe… such lovely pictures…”
Grinning ear to ear, the receptionist leafed through my photos and picked one to turn into my hunter license.
“Ta-da~! Your hunter registration is complete. Congratulations on becoming a hunter.”
She moved to hand me my hunter ID, then hesitated.
“Hmm, this license would work better worn like a necklace.”
Really?
Well, I suppose that beats fishing it out of my pocket every single time someone needs to see it.
The other hunters around here were all dangling their licenses around their necks too.
So the receptionist opened a drawer and began hunting for a cord to string my license on.
“This one's not pretty enough… this color's all wrong… something, something that suits this child…!”
Then her gaze suddenly locked, hawk-like, onto Receptionist B, who happened to be passing nearby.
“Senior…? That necklace looks awfully sturdy. Wasn't it a gift from your ex-boyfriend?”
“Huh? Well yeah, it's 18K gold, it'd be a waste to toss it…”
“Then hand it over.”
Whoosh! Grab!! Done!!!
In the blink of an eye, the receptionist snatched the necklace clean off her senior's neck with speed that would make a pickpocket weep, strung my hunter license on it, and hung it around mine.
“Kyaa~ it's adorable~! A gift from us.”
“Hold on a second. I never said I'd gi— huh?!”
Receptionist B abruptly vanished from my field of view.
When I looked up, she was sprawled on the floor by herself.
Sliiiide…
Hm?
Isn't that Receptionist A slyly retracting the foot she'd just stuck out beside the fallen Receptionist B?
Did you trip her on purpose?
“Consider that money you borrowed from me forgiven.”
“Th-thumbs up…”
Receptionist A struck some kind of deal, and the fallen Receptionist B responded with a raised thumb.
These two really know how to enjoy life.
“So is registration all done? Can I go hunt anomalies now?”
At my question, the receptionist smiled brightly and pointed somewhere with both hands, ceremoniously.
“Yes~! For beginners, we recommend hunting on Tower Floor 1, in the zones where easy anomalies appear.”
“Would that be this place, by any chance?”
I showed her the business card and hand-drawn map the woman had given me earlier.
“Oh my, Baekyeom? You got a card from someone quite famous.”
A celebrity? Was she some high-ranked hunter?
“Hold onto that card carefully. It means she'd like you to reach out if you ever need help.”
Reach out?
But I don't have a smartphone…?
First thing I buy with my earnings: a smartphone.
“And this map is… yes~! It's accurate. Follow this map and hunt your first anomaly.”
Smiling sweetly, the receptionist patted my head once more.
“Um, would you… maybe like to take a selfie with me?”
What's a selfie?
Unfamiliar word, but from context I can tell it's something to do with photos.
“Sure.”
“Thank you~!!!”
The receptionist vaulted clean over the counter, dropped into a crouch beside me, and snapped the selfie in record time.
Click!
And right on cue for the shot, a crowd of hunters passing nearby struck the silliest poses they could muster, photobombing our background.
These people really do live joyfully.
“This photo is going in a frame~! Anyway, good luck on your first Tower conquest~! And please request me at the desk next time too~!”
And so, bathed in the receptionist's enthusiastic send-off and the warm gazes of the surrounding hunters, I set my feet toward Tower Floor 1.