A Feast of True Friendship (3)

Namgung Jinwi. He was the young master of the Namgung family and the eldest of five siblings. The Namgung family was renowned throughout the Central Plains, their prestige echoing far and wide. It went without saying that every family was desperate to marry their daughters into it.

And as the eldest son and young master, Namgung Jinwi's position in the marriage market was nothing short of top-tier. ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠On top of that, he was exceptionally handsome and had risen to the ranks of a later-generation expert. He was the Murim's alpha male, plain and simple.

Namgung Jinwi had never felt intimidated growing up. With his solid background and martial arts improving day by day, he was undeniably popular among his friends.

"Young Master Namgung! Please marry me!"

Even when countless women proposed to him, he'd reply, "Sorry, but it's not the time for romance yet."

He was the type who reveled in his own excellence. Even when he dated a woman he liked—finding her like a needle in a haystack—and she pleaded, "Young Master, how can you leave a girl like me so lonely?"

"Does that mean I have to give up my martial training for a stroll with you?"

"Well..."

"Sorry. Let's break up."

He never gave his heart to anyone for long.

Then, for the first time, Namgung Jinwi fell head over heels at first sight. She was Dang Jeong-yu, the youngest daughter of the Dang family. She too occupied the pinnacle of the marriage market—stunningly beautiful with voluptuous hips, the very symbol of fertility.

The Murim's alpha male and alpha female. It was only natural they'd be drawn to each other.

"Will you marry me, Lady Dang?"

"Sure."

Their union was hailed as the marriage of the century. And no matter what anyone said, Namgung Jinwi was the next family head in line. His future was paved with gold.

But there was one unforeseen problem. It revealed itself on their wedding night, during their first consummation.

"...? Young Master?"

"What's wrong, my wife?"

"Don't joke around."

"What joke...?"

"No..."

Dang Jeong-yu looked down and went pale as a ghost.

"Does my body displease you?"

"No!"

"Then why so soon...?"

"It's... my first time..."

Who would've thought ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠the Central Plains' ultimate alpha male would have issues in bed?

That night, the attempted consummation ended in failure. Namgung Jinwi lasted less than a few minutes before leaving the room. Under the bright moonlight, he swung his sword endlessly, as if to clear his mind of distractions. He climbed onto a large rock and spread his fingers.

'Rabbit...'

His eyes filled with despair as he pictured a rabbit. He'd never considered it a problem before. Maintaining chastity before marriage was a given. There'd been no reason to worry.

But to have something that couldn't last long and wouldn't even stand up properly? For the first time, Namgung Jinwi felt a massive weight settle on his heart.

A year passed since that day. He diligently underwent young master training, with no issues on the path to becoming family head. But the lack of heirs was the problem.

A full year since they tied the knot, and still no children. In a world where martial artists popped out eight kids like clockwork, the whispers about the next Namgung head were damning enough.

The guy's useless in bed. Probably finishes like a rabbit. Quick pop!

And the worst part? They were all spot on.

Namgung Jinwi, who'd never lived intimidated, had no clue how to handle this.

"Sorry, my wife."

"It's okay. Let's try again."

"Thank you... truly."

But.

"That's enough for tonight."

"Ah..."

"Don't be so down."

"......"

The thing, already shrunken in defeat, refused to rise. Their relationship grew distant. Dang Jeong-yu rarely left the house, while Namgung Jinwi spent more time outside. Fights became frequent, and he always lost.

Realizing this couldn't go on, he vowed to change. He wanted kids, no matter what. His solution? Gather intel from the best sources—men who'd fathered eight or more.

He infiltrated their circles, even smoking cigarettes he never touched before, haunting smoking areas and inns in other regions. He ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠eavesdropped on every word.

His martial training suffered, but who cared? The first night was priority one.

Then, he overheard: "Till morning?"

"Yeah."

"I'm worried I can't last. How with a ninth kid?"

"No worries. Gather 'round."

Jackpot! Pretending nonchalance, he edged closer, ears perked.

"It's called a condom."

"Con...dom?"

"Yeah. With this, morning's no problem. Total game-changer!"

What? A condom lets you go till morning? Namgung Jinwi ditched his unsmoked cigarette.

Condom. That was the key.

"Where do you get it?"

"Know that ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠weird inn at the edge of Ghost Soul Great Forest?"

"Yeah!"

"Nah."

"Anyway, they sell condoms there."

Perfect! He bolted from the smoking area. Buy a condom there, and he could go all night without rest? Was it some elixir? Whatever—he had to check.

But he missed the tail end: "No pregnancy worries! Relax, and you last till morning."

p>

Unaware it was birth control, Namgung Jinwi dashed to the convenience store using his movement technique.

And on the day he bought the condom.

"...Again tonight?"

"I-I got vital info. This time it'll work."

"...Fine."

Dang Jeong-yu was visibly fed up. No surprise—constant negativity wears anyone down.

Namgung Jinwi pulled out a condom.

"Wh-what's this?"

"What is it?"

"Looks like a ring... but sealed in the middle."

"You bought it without knowing?"

Irritation flashed in her eyes. He panicked. He just wanted to do better.

"L-let's try it."

But.

"Enough for tonight."

"B-but they said this lasts till morning..."

"I'm tired."

"...Sorry."

"...I'll sleep first."

He stared at the shriveled, twisted condom, shoulders slumping.

Finishing his tale, Namgung Jinwi let out a deep sigh.

"That's how it happened. Thought it was an elixir—what a joke. Who buys an elixir for 50 coppers? My bad."

Poor guy. I'd been impressed by Murim folks' stamina when selling condoms. Turns out even they had relatable human struggles. No different from anywhere else.

I nodded quietly.

"You got the wrong item. That's birth control."

"Birth... control? Means no kids?"

"Yes."

"Ah. Didn't know."

"Why not ask? You said it was for your collection, so I figured."

He blushed.

"T-too embarrassing..."

"What's embarrassing? More than having no heirs?"

"Well, no."

I crossed my arms, eyeing him. Quick-as-a-rabbit half-measure. Can't even perform properly. No way he'd satisfy her. What now? Not just the condom issue.

I'd thought he ditched it 'cause size mismatch. But this pitiful backstory? I had to help!

Any guy would feel his heart break for this.

I stood abruptly.

"Wh-where to?"

"Wait here."

To the POS. This wasn't just his problem anymore. A united male front to solve it. True brotherly friendship.

Don't worry, bro. I'll set you up for paradise anytime.

This was a convenience store—modern life's mini-version. Everything available.

Hit the order button. Adult goods tab appeared. I'd ignored it, thinking condoms only. Now, time for use.

Vigor supplements, incoming.

Yes! Real elixir!

Order ten to start. Boxes stacked neatly on the daily goods shelf.

Grabbed one, returned with a solemn face, set it before him.

"Wh-what's this?"

"Super effective elixir. Take it, no more bedroom worries."

Not a cure-all, just a health supplement. But placebo effect exists. Crucial for his rock-bottom confidence.

"Trust me. Tomorrow's breakfast guaranteed."

"R-really?"

"Absolutely."

I nodded firmly. He bought it.

"Thanks. How much?"

"Six silver."

Pricier than condoms. No hesitation.

"Here. Six silver."

Snatched the Male Power Booster Max and stood.

Then, ding-a-ling— door opened and closed.

Turned: teary-eyed bandits and condom buyers stood there.

"What'll it be?"

"Owner."

Determined faces, like saving the nation. My spirits soared too.

"We heard everything."

One hugged Namgung Jinwi tight.

"How you've suffered!!"

"...?"

"That's crossing the line."

"Even if hubby's bad in bed, shave his head? Show her who's boss!"

"This ain't just your fight! Every man in the Central Plains' common quest!"

Ah. Tears welling. True bro code.

Bedroom unity brings brotherhood.

The first condom buyer, Jung-gang, sat Namgung Jinwi down solemnly, taking the opposite seat.

"Speed lecture starts now. How to father eight kids! What you need! Memorize every detail."

The intense vibe? Namgung Jinwi's embarrassment vanished. He nodded gravely.

"Please, hero!"

Till dusk, Murim Viagra bros' crash course raged. Raw, vital info flowed freely.

A feast of true friendship.