92. My Person, My Own
92. My Person, My Own
[Chapter 92] - My Person, My Possession
Immediately after Morgan left the room, I was so covered in goosebumps that I couldn't move for a moment.
How on earth did she know? I had hidden Snow White on the third floor before I even met Morgan. Did she have a hunch from the moment she asked if my body smelled like the culprit's magic? What would have happened if Morgan hadn't taken a liking to me?
As those thoughts swirled in my head, a bitter taste filled my mouth. Was my desperate bluff just a child's antics in Morgan's eyes? Now I understood why Morgan called me 'little one~ little one~' instead of Vivian.
To Morgan, all my actions must have been nothing more than a child showing off. Just like a child telling transparent lies to deceive an adult, wasn't that how I looked to her? Even though she seemed like a total airhead, I realized she wasn't a Great Witch for nothing.
I rubbed my goosebump-covered arms and let out a dry laugh. Seriously, there's no other way to describe this than pure luck. The reason Morgan let Snow White go so easily must mean she could find her easily if she really wanted to.
'...Seriously, what an unpredictable person.'
Thinking that, I quietly slipped out of the lounge. Morgan was nowhere to be seen, so she must have really left, and the ballroom was quite quiet, perhaps because the ball had ended. I could only hear the sounds of people rushing out and carriages moving busily in the distance.
'...Didn't I make them wait too long?'
Unlike the young ladies returning home after the ball, I headed deeper into the building. To bring back Titania and Snow White, who were in the lounge on the third floor. I was worried if it would be okay for Titania and Snow White to be together, but I didn't think anything bad had happened.
After all, if something had happened, Ainsel would have come to tell me. If they had fought or something, Ainsel definitely would have come to inform me. But the fact that she hadn't meant they were getting along quite well. With that light heart, I slowly headed to the third-floor lounge.
The moment I opened the door to the third-floor lounge where I'd hidden Titania and Snow White, I couldn't help but be slightly flustered. Because inside the room, there was only Titania, sitting with her legs crossed and a grumpy expression.
"...? Titania? Why are you alone? Where is that princess?"
"...She just left, saying Mother was coming late."
"...What?"
As I couldn't continue speaking in my bewilderment, Titania let out a deep sigh with a pouty expression. Then she muttered in a small voice, 'It's still a long way off...' What kind of conversation did they have? I wasn't sure of the details, but one thing was certain: Titania didn't seem to be in a good mood.
Did she see Morgan leaving through the window? Or did she really leave because I came too late? Both seemed possible, so my head started to ache. I told her we should talk... and she just ignored that and left?
'Who did I listen to that boring Morgan's stories for for hours...!'
A surge of anger welled up, and I let out a deep sigh without realizing it.
Did she really have no intention of talking to me at all? Was she just hiding here for a moment to avoid Morgan? Barely suppressing my bubbling anger, I sat down next to Titania as if exhausted and leaned my head on her shoulder.
"M-Mother?"
"Is it okay if I stay like this for a moment? I'm so exhausted today."
It was a truly, truly exhausting day.
Because of the cross-dressing, I had to bind my chest tightly with bandages, making it hard to breathe, and I thought I would go crazy because my head was itchy from the wig. On top of that, I had suddenly met Snow White and the Great Witch, so it felt like I had used up a week's worth of stamina in one day.
My head was so itchy that I whipped off the wig and buried my face in Titania's shoulder, leaning my body against her. My weight made Titania's upper body tilt slightly, but soon Titania straightened her waist and supported my body.
As I closed my eyes for a moment, Titania asked me.
"I-If you're very tired... shall I give you a lap pillow? There's still time..."
"A lap pillow?"
"Since Mother often did it for me... I wanted to do it for you today..."
A lap pillow... Honestly, the urge to just lie down in bed right now was shooting up like a chimney. Even if I went back now, I had to remove the makeup and wash up, which would make me tired for another few hours. Before that, if it was just for a very short while...?
"...Then, may I ask you to?"
"O-Of course! Quickly, lie down here!"
I chuckled at the sight of Titania patting her lap, telling me to lie down quickly. Then, just for a very short while. Thinking I'd lie down for just a moment, I gently rested my head on Titania's knees, where she had her legs neatly together.
I couldn't help but smile, thinking it was truly the first time I was receiving a lap pillow from Titania. Titania had really grown up. The day had come when I was receiving a lap pillow from Titania.
"Others would be shocked if they saw this. A Queen resting while lying on a Princess's lap..."
"It's just us here, so don't worry about other people. Besides, who would say anything when a daughter wants to give her mother a lap pillow?"
Looking at Titania, who was smiling prettily while looking down at me, I didn't care anymore. Yeah, anyone who would say something about this would be the weird one. I closed my eyes for a moment against the drowsiness that was washing over me, and surrendered my body to the comfortable feeling.
"I'll just... close my eyes for a moment, so let me know when it's time."
*
Titania was worried that if things went on like this, her heart wouldn't be able to take it.
Even this small skinship, which she usually didn't think twice about, became a huge stimulus and was truly troublesome. When Mother suddenly buried her face in her shoulder, she felt Mother's scent, and she thought her heart was going to drop.
'Really... if things go on like this, even holding Mother's hand will be difficult.'
Titania let out a sigh, quiet enough that Vivian wouldn't hear, and lowered her head to gaze intently at Vivian's face as she lay on her lap. Then, she gently touched the tips of Vivian's curly golden hair and smiled a truly happy smile.
Soft, fine skin, delicate and plump lips, deep and clear eyes, and eyelashes densely embroidered along the eyelids. She was truly pretty and incredibly lovely. The mother's face she had always seen looked even prettier today.
Thinking that such a beautiful person was her mother and at the same time the person she loved, Titania felt as good as if she had put something sweet in her mouth. But behind that sweetness, a bitter taste always remained.
Titania learned clearly today that the identity of this bitter taste was jealousy. Along with loving her mother, she came to hate it when her mother paid attention to other people.
Even if that person was an existence just like herself. She wanted her mother to pay attention only to her, and she always wanted those green eyes to look only at her.
However, Titania knew well that she had no reason or method to force that on her mother. After all—
'Mother is my person, but she is not my possession.'
If the love as a lover that Mother spoke of was truly 'a selfish heart wanting everything of that person to be directed only at oneself,' then she was definitely loving her mother as a lover.
Titania wanted to go beyond being family (my person) with her mother and make her mother her lover (my possession).
That was why she hated it when her mother tried to give affection to someone other than herself, and she hated it when her mother tried to pay attention to others. A selfish heart wanting her mother's emotions, heart, and love to be directed only at her.
'If I tell her this, will Mother hate me? Or will she accept me?'
Even at thirteen, Titania knew she shouldn't convey these feelings. She also vaguely knew that this love was a bit wrong to begin with.
But she had no intention of giving up. She was just waiting for now. Calmly, little by little, she just had to approach her mother with this heart. Because there was plenty of time to be with her mother.
'Because Mother isn't running away, either.'
*
The next day.
Having successfully(?) finished the masquerade ball, Titania and I were able to return to the royal castle late at night.
Since Titania had also promised me she would never attend a masquerade ball again, I felt relieved, thinking there wouldn't be such events in Titania's life anymore.
'It's not that high society is bad, but there's no need to go to a ball that's like a symbol of depravity.'
Titania, exhausted from the carriage trip that lasted all day, fell fast asleep without even eating dinner as soon as we arrived at the royal castle. Since she said she hadn't slept properly last night, it was a natural result.
Looking down at Titania, who was sleeping soundly in my bed, I chuckled to myself and changed into my negligee. Just as I closed my eyes next to Titania,
"Wow... you really still share a room at this age?"
Startled by the voice coming from the terrace, I jumped up and looked at where the voice came from. I thought I'd have to wait another 3 years or set a trap with food to meet that child again...
"...You really came to my bedroom."
"Didn't you tell me to come find you? Why? Are you embarrassed now that you've let a stranger into your bedroom?"
Snow White, who was leaning against the door leading to the terrace and giggling, looked at me. I wanted to ask why she didn't wait and left yesterday, but I swallowed it down.
Then, Snow White, who was smirking, gestured for me to come closer.
"You said let's talk. So I came. But it's a bit awkward to talk here..."
As Snow White threw open the terrace door, a slightly salty sea breeze brushed against the tip of my nose.
'Sea smell?' At the sudden smell of the sea, I raised my head and looked at the terrace; it wasn't the royal palace terrace where I usually went to get some air.
Beyond the terrace where a small table was placed, I could see the night sea with white foam rising. It was as if there was no boundary with that night sea, and the stars embroidered in the sky shone along with the waves as if they had all fallen onto the sea.
As I looked at that scenery, I saw a small hut on the beach. At the same time as I saw smoke rising from the small hut's chimney, I could faintly hear the sound of children chattering and giggling.
I felt like I knew what kind of hut that was, and whose laughter that was, so I stared blankly at the hut without realizing it. Then, Snow White smirked and sat at the table first, looking at me.
"Come over and sit, Vivian."
*
