Chapter 52
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Translator: penny
Chapter: 52
Chapter Title: Trials of the Pussy Church (1)
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No matter how you sliced it, it was a pussy.
Smooth curves.
An oval stone, split straight down the middle.
And at the top, a cute little nub sticking out—the clitoris.
This was a perfect pussy shape that no one could deny.
Even if an art student showed up claiming it was abstract sculpture.
A passing elementary kid would point and say, "Mom, is that a dick buddy?" It was that blatant.
But...
Why the hell was there a pussy standing in the yard of this abandoned church?
I looked around.
The yard overgrown with weeds.
Shattered stained glass here and there.
A doorknob hanging in tatters.
Anyone could see this place had been abandoned for at least a decade. Total haunted house vibes.
For starters, the fact that a rundown church like this still stood smack in the middle of Seoul was a mystery.
This was Seoul.
Prime land where dirt cost more than gold.
If it were any regular building, it'd have been redeveloped ages ago or chopped up for compensation cash.
But a church?
Hmm. Religious property they couldn't touch?
Suspicious.
Super suspicious.
Something smelled off.
Not just the musty scent of an old building—something rotten was in the air.
That was when I heard it.
A presence behind me.
Crackling footsteps.
Crunch. Crunch.
The sound of grass being stepped on.
"What brings you here, brother?"
A soft, gentle voice.
But it had this weird, sticky viscosity to it.
I turned around.
A woman was emerging from the shadows.
Wearing a black veil and a black habit that reached her ankles.
A nun?
Wait, was this a church or a cathedral?
I'd never seen a real nun in full habit before.
Especially not in central Seoul, right in front of a crumbling ruin.
Normally, nuns conjure images of kindly, saintly holiness.
But this one...
She was different.
The smile playing on her lips wasn't holy—it was seductive.
Her eyes had that slight upward tilt, fox-like features laced with charm.
She oozed sex appeal like she was dead set on bewitching anyone who looked.
This was no ordinary cathedral, that was for sure.
Time to play nice, at least.
Gotta be the gentleman.
"Hello. I was just out for a walk and this place caught my eye with its unique vibe. Mind if I come in?"
I asked politely.
The nun covered her mouth and laughed.
"Heehee, not at all. This place is always open. Any lost lamb is welcome."
Even her laugh was alluring.
This felt less like a cathedral and more like a witch's lair.
Welcoming lost lambs?
Sounded like she planned to devour them. Was that just my imagination?
"Sorry if this is rude, but is this place still operating? The building looks a bit..."
I trailed off, gesturing at it.
It screamed "ghost central."
"It does look a little worn to you too, doesn't it, brother? But contrary to what you might expect, it's just your average cathedral."
Average?
With a pussy statue in the yard?
And what did she mean by my expectations, exactly?
"Oh, sorry. I didn't mean it like that... It just seems neglected."
"No need to apologize. It is rundown, that's true. We're just delayed on repairs due to circumstances."
The nun looked up at the cathedral.
Her eyes grew distant.
That expression screamed deep backstory—like the last heir clinging to a fallen noble house.
But...
My interest wasn't the building.
It was that thing towering behind it, gleaming under the moonlight.
I couldn't hold back my curiosity.
"One thing I'm wondering about... What's with the statue?"
I pointed at it.
The nun's gaze followed my finger.
And stopped on the statue.
"That statue?"
"Yeah. The shape is... kinda unique."
I couldn't bring myself to say "looks like a pussy."
Not in front of holy clergy.
But then...
"It's a pussy."
...
What?
What did she just say?
"...Pardon?"
"A pussy statue. A woman's genitalia."
"......"
I was speechless.
She said it so casually.
Like announcing "This is an apple."
Holy shit, it really was a pussy?
I'd hoped it was just my overflowing horniness playing tricks.
They actually carved a real pussy and stuck it in the yard?
This was a cathedral, right?
Why a pussy in a cathedral yard?
"Why's there a pussy... in a cathedral...?"
My voice trembled as I asked.
The nun stared straight at me.
Her eyes were deep.
"There are no brothers in this cathedral."
No brothers.
Meaning no male parishioners.
So, just women?
Like a convent?
Even then, a pussy statue made no sense.
Girls' middle schools, high schools, colleges didn't have pussy statues.
...
Wait.
All women.
Worshiping pussies.
Where had I heard this setup before?
That Dick Uncle guy mentioned it.
The Pussy Church.
Right, Dicky?
You think so too?
The little guy agreed.
This was the Pussy Church, no doubt.
My dick shouted it with total conviction.
If my brain-trust dick said so, it had to be true.
Stumbling into the Pussy Church by chance like this?
Fate?
Curiosity piqued.
I'd been mulling over Dick Uncle's offer.
And now here I was, walking right into it.
Time for some recon?
"Sisters only... ah, so it's a cathedral just for sisters? Like a no-men zone?"
"No. A cathedral like that could never exist in this world. There are just no brothers coming. We don't turn anyone away."
Oh ho.
Doesn't turn people away?
So I could join?
Opportunity.
Undercover investigation time.
I decided then and there to become a devout believer.
"So, could I come here? Truth is, I'm a cradle Catholic."
I placed a hand on my chest.
Total bullshit, of course.
I had zero faith.
"Just moved nearby, was scouting the area, saw the cathedral. Been looking for a place to pray..."
Her face lit up at my words.
She seemed genuinely thrilled.
"Oh my! A fellow parishioner! And to think you'd grace this humble place!"
The nun hopped in place with joy.
And then.
Bounce-.
...
What was that?
What did I just see?
Time froze.
As the nun jumped.
Her chest heaved dramatically.
The habit was baggy, designed to hide the figure.
But...
That insane bounce piercing through the thick fabric.
Those weren't normal.
Bigger than any woman in my database.
Senior Jisoo?
Couldn't even compete.
No match.
Those were weapons.
"Brother, why don't we step inside and chat? I'd love to treat you to some tea."
The nun grabbed my arm.
Warm.
And up close? Even more insane.
"Sounds good. Looking forward to it, Sister. My baptismal name is... John."
I made it up on the spot.
Common name—no way she'd suspect.
"Nice to meet you, Brother John. I'm Maria."
Sister Maria.
Common name too.
She clasped her hands in prayer pose.
Bringing them to her chest.
Squish-.
Her arms pressed her tits together, forming a massive canyon.
The Y-line visible even through the habit.
...
Today, I became a Pussy Church believer.
No one's changing my mind.
Inside the cathedral.
She led me to the vestry.
Outside looked abandoned, but inside was surprisingly tidy.
Not a speck of dust.
Faint incense in the air.
Sister Maria brought tea.
Steaming cup.
Aromatic.
But I couldn't let my guard down.
This was Pussy Church territory.
They shunned men and worshiped weird shit.
Could be like Dick Uncle slipping me something strange.
Better check.
"...Sorry, Sister, but is there any semen extract in the tea? I'm a bit wary of that stuff."
I asked politely.
She chuckled.
"Brother John, the more I see you, the more I like you. Hehe, we don't add that kind of depraved... ahem, unclean extract here."
Almost said "depraved."
Yup.
Definite Pussy Church.
Hostility toward semen.
Calling it unclean sealed it.
Good, safe then.
No risk of drinking someone else's load.
'...So, is this laced with pussy juice extract instead?'
Dick Uncle said they mix it into their rice.
This tea too?
I peered into the cup.
Clear liquid.
No oily sheen.
Just floral scent.
Well, pussy juice beats semen.
It's a woman's fluids.
Even from a stranger... way better than cum.
"Cheers."
Slurp.
Floral bliss filled my mouth.
Oh, this is pretty good.
Rich flower aroma.
Sweet yet bitter.
"It's lily tea. Good for calming nerves and insomnia."
Lily.
Lily.
GL.
...
Not even hiding it in the tea choice.
Lily, huh.
Pussy Church symbolism?
Whatever.
Tastes good, that's what matters.
"The fragrance is amazing. Really soothing."
Not empty flattery.
My heart from the pussy statue shock was calming down.
The nun sat across from me.
Hands on the table, gazing intently.
Intense.
Her eyes burned.
Like she wanted to eat me.
"...Brother. Our parish has some unique rules."
Here it came.
Cult trademark.
Weird rules.
Ten million entry fee.
Deed to your house.
Or eat pussy rice.
"Rules?"
"Yes. You're free to come pray. But to join internal activities, you must pass one trial."
Trial for internal activities...
Qualification for the legendary pussy ritual?
Worth a shot then.
Hundreds of women rubbing together.
Call it a viewing fee—trial's nothing.
"A trial? Like memorizing Bible verses?"
I was confident.
Still remembered the Lord's Prayer from chomping Choco Pies at church as a kid.
Apostles' Creed maybe?
She shook her head.
And stood.
"No, nothing that boring."
Swish.
Fabric rustling.
"...Sister?"
I couldn't believe my eyes.
She removed her veil.
Long black hair cascaded down.
And then.
Swish-.
Shit, why's she stripping all of a sudden?
Dicky.
You seeing this?
Look at this.
Even my dick was perking up.
The nun slowly lowered her habit.
Shoulders exposed.
Collarbone visible.
And then.
Boing. Boing.
"......"
Breath caught in my throat.
Holy fuck, why are those tits so huge?
Enormous.
Way too big.
The weapons hidden in the habit burst free.
No bra.
Brave no-bra.
Massive breasts jiggled, defying gravity just a bit.
Not saggy.
Firm, full, heavy.
Fist-sized areolas.
But a gorgeous hot pink.
J-cup? K?
Bigger than my head.
Could suffocate in there.
Happy death.
"S-Sister? What is this...?"
I stammered in shock.
Where to look?
She strode forward, proudly baring her naked torso.
Her body scent hit me—richer than lilies, pure female musk.
"The trial, brother."
She whispered in my ear.
"Endure for one hour. Exactly one hour without cumming."
...
What?
Endure not cumming?
She sat on my lap.
Plush ass cheeks.
Her massive tits against my chest.
Squish.
Warm.
"Think you can handle it, Brother John?"
She nipped my earlobe.
Lightning shot through me.
Yeah, I was pretty sure.
This was the crisis of my life.