I've Returned
I should've closed my eyes in satisfaction in the commander's arms for the second time. So why am I standing stock-still in the train aisle?
A profound sense of dissonance, like the process had been cleanly severed, leaving only the result. I glanced around and bolted straight for the nearest restroom. Standing before the mirror there, I muttered,
"My body's the same, at least."
My reflection was still Leira. Navy-blue hair, golden eyes, a serene beauty. The girl in the mirror furrowed her brow in confusion.
Right. Come to think of it, my abdomen and side got torn open. I unbuttoned my uniform, exposing my skin. But the flawless white expanse bore no trace of injury.
A dream? Hallucination? No, that's not it. This feels more like...
I frantically rummaged through my uniform pockets. In the right skirt pocket, I found a terminal. Powering it on revealed a date from a week ago.
The interior of the train heading to Ruina. The death memory too vivid to be fake. Right up to the date on the terminal, as if I'd rewound time itself.
In other words...
"I've returned, haven't I."
Death regression. The phenomenon of reversing time triggered by death. Setting aside whether it's even possible for now, it was the most fitting explanation.
No way, that's impossible...
My heart plummeted. After all the effort I'd poured into that perfect death. For it all to be undone, as if it never happened? That's just...
"The best..."
The face beyond the mirror—Leira's—twisted in ecstasy. Eyes glazing over, mouth half-open, cheeks flushed crimson. Eerily lascivious, like she'd been intoxicated by something. A face utterly unlike Leira, one no one could ever see.
But it couldn't be helped. No eyes on me here anyway. And right now, I couldn't keep up the act if my life depended on it.
Truth is... I was a little disappointed. I wanted to see more variety.
No regrets—I'd done my absolute best with what I had. But saying there was no lingering dissatisfaction would be a lie. Honestly, just dying right in front of me felt too bland.
Like having my dignity ravaged before the immobile commander. Or manipulating him into taking my life with his own hands. Hell, becoming his lover and getting stolen away wouldn't be bad either. Then watching him writhe in agony each time.
Over and over, again and again, endlessly repeating. That exquisite moment above all...
"Ah."
Suddenly, a scene flashed in my mind. The commander's face, locked in a kiss with me, tormented to his core. The sight of him, refusing to abandon me until the end, finally crumbling completely... it was truly...
"..."
Click.
I locked the restroom door tight. Now it was my private sanctuary, undisturbed by anyone.
Haaa, hot breath escaped my lips. My patience had reached its limit.
*
Whoosh. I washed my hands at the sink, composing myself calmly. I understood what had happened: a regression that defied time itself.
But would this regression repeat endlessly? No guarantee.
This might be my one and only shot. I don't even know how it happened in the first place.
Assuming it was the last, shouldn't I make a choice with zero regrets? I didn't know what that was yet, but...
I slipped back into my clothes. Then—throb—a sharp pain lanced through my arm. So that's why women carry handkerchiefs. The bite mark faded smoothly beneath my uniform.
Current time... right after the train derailment. After slaying the signal-jamming Erosion Species, en route to Ruina.
Which meant the commander was on this train. Good thing I'd vented my heat beforehand. Facing him in that state would've been disastrous.
Now dressed, I exited the restroom. I'd lost about ten minutes to my indulgence. A bit long for a bathroom break, but claiming I checked my luggage should cover it.
As I headed back to the cabin with that excuse in mind, I bumped straight into the commander coming the other way.
"Ah. Commander."
What was our distance like at this point? We hadn't built rapport yet, so polite formality, I suppose. I tilted my head innocently.
But the commander, spotting me, reacted unexpectedly.
"Leira!"
"Eek?!"
Whoosh. He pulled me into a sudden embrace. Caught off guard in his arms, I floundered.
Wait, we've only known each other a few hours, right? Not close enough for random hugs...
Then lightning struck my mind. The possibility I'd dismissed outright now peeked out insistently.
...No way, this guy too?
If the commander had regressed from the future just like me, this unnatural behavior made perfect sense. Of course, it was mere suspicion until he confessed.
But rather than his stoic head suddenly cracking, the regression theory felt more plausible.
He hasn't even been permitted to call me Leira yet... Yeah, this is basically confirmed.
Wait, hold on. If that's true, this is a problem. My regression coming with his? If so, then...
I couldn't pull off the netorare plot!
Kuh, I was gonna fake getting stolen away and shred his heart to pieces...!
But if he'd truly regressed, recklessly recreating netorare would be foolish. I might get dropped as the heroine. Even I'd lose affection for a slutty girl, no matter how much I liked her.
And if my death became just some woman's, not the heroine's, it wouldn't move him. Ugh, I wanted to see him wail as his lover got taken...!
Still, it wasn't all bad. I could exploit this too. Forcing him to witness my death repeatedly had its own appeal.
For now... how to handle this moment.
"Um, Commander? Even for a Valkyrie and her commander, this so soon is a bit much..."
"...Ah, sorry! I just... lost control...!"
I feigned innocence, flustering awkwardly. A side of Leira different from the reliable one he'd seen: awkward in romance, a total klutz at love.
Realizing what he'd done, he startled and released me hastily. Now at a distance, his face came into clear view. Various emotions flickered over his stoic features.
Joy, guilt, regret, fear, anxiety... Yep. Broadcasting his return loud and clear with that face.
How far back did he come from? Is he the cause of the regression? Maybe I got caught in his by accident...
Nothing certain yet. This wasn't in the original story. I'd need to gather intel separately.
Hiding my dark intentions, I scratched my cheek shyly. No real aversion, but startled all the same.
"Commander... why the sudden hug? There must be a reason, right?"
"Ugh..."
"We've only just met, but I believe you're a good man, Commander."
Well, the reason was obvious. He'd watched me die horribly right before his eyes. Seeing me hale and hearty triggered the impulse.
But I was playing dumb, ignorant of it all. I gazed at him worriedly, urging him to explain.
He clamped his mouth shut, pondering, then spoke with clenched fists.
"It was... because I was anxious."
"Anxious?"
"I searched the whole train but couldn't find you... I worried something happened. Especially after that incident earlier."
Ah, brushing it off like that. He clearly had no intention of revealing the regression. Fair enough—I'd planned to clam up and toy with him too.
I get it. Dominating with information asymmetry is such a thrill.
As I nodded inwardly in agreement, he asked with a hint of impatience,
"Where have you been all this time?"
"Checking my luggage on the way back, then a quick restroom stop..."
"Ah."
Silence fell with his absentminded murmur. Because I'd averted my eyes shyly in my answer. He must think he'd poked a sensitive spot with needless worry.
Well, truth is I was late indulging my urges... but maybe boost some favor here.
I smiled awkwardly and said,
"Hehe, feels kinda strange."
"What do you mean?"
"I'm pretty good at everything, so people rarely worry about me. Sure, the sudden hug startled me... but thank you for caring, Commander."
His eyes widened in realization. Wonder what memory flashed in his head. Maybe overlaying me with the old me.
Good. Time to play dumb once more. I closed the distance, eyeing him playfully.
"But Commander, it's not 'Miss Leira' anymore? When did you start calling me so casually?"
"Ah, that... if it's uncomfortable..."
"Hehe. No, I like Leira. Feels friendlier, right?"
I answered brightly, evoking the old Leira. He gritted his teeth, as if tormented by memories. Ahaha, thinking of my death, huh. Adorable.
Soon, he frowned faintly, lost in thought. Then murmured so softly it might slip away,
"...I wouldn't mind dropping the honorific either."
"Pardon? What was that?"
"No, nothing..."
With that, we returned to the cabin. Facing seats where we could see each other's faces. Leaning into the plush chair, I said abruptly to him,
"You know, Valkyries have better physical abilities than regular humans."
"I... know that."
"Some can see in pitch-black nights like broad daylight. Isn't that amazing?"
"That does... sound impressive."
He nodded, baffled by my random topic. Grinning ear to ear, I continued,
"I wish I had something like that. Super hearing, maybe. What about you, Commander?"
"Me...? Wait, what did you just—"
"Hehe, what?"
"Ugh... why pretend you didn't hear..."
"Ehehe, who knows~?"
Yeah. Even regressed, he's still the commander. His reactions made toying with him worthwhile—I chuckled.
He cracked a small smile in return. Good. If he stayed rigidly tense, there'd be no fun in breaking him.
For now, start by rebuilding that shattered heart.
Looking forward to more, Commander.
The train headed to Ruina. This made twice. My chest swelled with anticipation for what lay ahead.