A Homecoming That Hurts the Heart
After taking a thorough beating on the back, I joined them at the table with my mother, whose face was still swollen. The food on the table was the same modest dinner our family always had, even after two years. A smooth soup with some texture, pickled root vegetables, hard bread that could be stored for a long time, and semi-dried fruit to sweeten the mouth after the meal. My portion had been added to the table that once held only two servings. My usual seat at the table, the one I had always claimed. I pulled out the chair that hadn't been used in ages and sat down on the cold seat for the first time in two years.
During my time away from home, I had eaten all kinds of food, but nothing compared to this most reassuring and comforting taste.
“……”
The only sounds at the silent table were the clinking of jaws and chewing. After finishing the meal, I was unceremoniously driven straight to bed without any further discussion. My room looked far more organized than it had been before I left. The familiar comfort, as if I had been here just yesterday, loosened the tension that had been coiled in my shoulders.
“Let's talk tomorrow. Get some rest today.”
“Okay.”
Click. The door closed after that brief exchange with my mother. I took off my leather coat, guards, and gloves one by one and placed them on the desk, which hadn't gathered a speck of dust. Maybe because I had worn and used them for quite a while, they gave off a musty smell that tickled my nose. When I opened the neatly folded drawers, all I found were clothes that no longer fit. I grabbed the shoulders of a shirt that looked quite worn and held it up to my body. As expected, there was no way I could even try it on—the difference from my current physique was too great.
‘If only it would stretch like an equipped item…’
Even though I thought that to myself, the shrunken clothes remained stubbornly silent. With no other choice, I folded the clothes back up and lay down on the bed wearing only the innermost layer. The thick, fluffy winter blanket at home was incomparably more comfortable than any bed I had slept in during the two years away. Carrying unspoken words in my heart, I quickly drifted through the short night.
Time passed, and the morning of reunion arrived. The sunlight mercilessly poked at my eyes, forcing them half-open. The scenery outside the window remained still, as if time had stopped. Winter in the countryside really left nothing to do. Crops weren't growing, and there was nothing to gather from the mountains. Even starving beasts couldn't find food and came down to where people lived—that was winter. The villagers simply survived day by day on their stockpiled food. That meant both my parents were home instead of working in the fields.
Just in case, I slipped the ring onto my finger and covered both hands with gloves. If it didn't fit yesterday, it might all come at once today. With determined resolve, I walked over and flung open the door to the living room.
“You're up?”
“Yeah…”
“Sit.”
Unlike my mother, who greeted me warmly as if the past two years had been an illusion, my father spoke firmly. The weighty command, made of just two short words, lingered in my ears. The most terrifying presence right now, more than any boss—my father sitting across from me with his arms crossed. The moment I quietly pulled out a chair and sat down, the first question came.
“Where have you been and what have you been doing?”
The question, thrown without even meeting my eyes, filled me with tension. My mother quietly joined us at the table and looked at me with a worried expression. Under their combined gazes, I opened my mouth with difficulty, even though I felt self-conscious. To the question of where I had been and what I had been doing, I answered that I had been doing something similar to mercenary work in the capital. To the question of why I hadn't come back, I added the story about the man who had taken me outside the village and explained that the situation hadn't allowed it.
The questions and answers continued one after another, like an interrogation. Both my parents seemed to have already guessed that something had happened while listening to my story, so they didn't press me further. Still, two years was a long time no matter how you looked at it. Even if there had been circumstances, unless I had been penniless and captured somewhere, I should have been able to return. Perhaps because he couldn't accept that, my father let out a long sigh, lowered his head, and scratched his forehead roughly before continuing.
“Haah… Still, you little punk, you could've come back whenever you wanted.”
“Even if I had, you wouldn't have let me leave the village again.”
At those words, I shot back at my father with conviction. I had thought about my parents' feelings in my own way. They had sent their child out on a trip, only for him to nearly die. In a situation where people had actually died, if I said I wanted to return to the capital, what would they say? Even if I were in their position, I wouldn't have allowed it. No—I couldn't have. Knowing that fact all too well, I hadn't been able to make the decision to return as I was.
“Still, you little punk, whew…”
My father trailed off as if frustrated, pressing his forehead, then ended the conversation with a sigh. He seemed to fully agree with my rebuttal that he wouldn't have let me leave the village again. On top of my father's speechless, dumbfounded face, I added another muttered excuse.
“I tried to send a letter, but they said it wouldn't be delivered to a remote village like ours…”
“Augh, if you can't even speak properly!”
At my muttered excuse, my father's arm shot up, unable to hold back any longer.
“Ack!”
With a reflexive yelp, I covered my face with my arms. It sounded like I had already been punched. But my father, who had stood up abruptly, suppressed his anger and sat back down. Only after confirming that did I relax my hunched body and return to my original posture. I had come out wearing the ring, prepared to get hit, but it seemed like I was okay… for now?
“Huu, who do you take after to be this fearless?”
My father let out a hollow sigh and continued. It wasn't that I took after someone to be fearless—it was that someone was so much scarier that I had become fearless about most things. My lips twitched, but I was afraid I'd really get hit if I said that, so I shut my mouth tight and lowered my head. After a brief silence, my father spoke again from across the table.
“Anyway, go to Rein's house and say hello.”
“Rein?”
Rein's name suddenly intruded into our family conversation. Well, I had planned to visit her today anyway, but… suddenly? When my father brought up Rein, my mother beside him looked startled.
“Oh, right. You have no idea how worried that girl was about you.”
As if she had forgotten something important, my mother spoke up from her seat. Then, as if urging me to get up quickly, she stood first and grabbed my shoulders, trying to pull me upward… I calmed my mother, who was making a fuss—I wasn't a newborn, after all, and I could get up on my own.
“Ah, I got it. I'll go, I'll go! Just let me get dressed…”
Before even eating breakfast, my first schedule for the day had been set. It was cold outside, but the clothes I had worn two years ago were all too small. I couldn't go out wearing clothes that didn't fit, so I had no choice but to prepare to leave in the same outfit I had arrived in. Leather top padded at the vital areas, winter pants with guards attached. It looked more like I was heading out to fight than visiting a friend's house.
“So, was mercenary life bearable?”
As I was hurriedly getting dressed, my father's voice from behind startled me and made me flinch.
“Aah, you scared me!”
I turned around and spoke at the voice that had suddenly pierced through the silence. Why was he suddenly asking about mercenary work? He hadn't seemed interested in this sort of thing at all. Surprised as I was, I thought for a moment to answer his question. Was it bearable? Well, to be honest, it was pretty miserable. When there was work outside, my back and waist didn't survive, and when it came to hunting monsters, there were more days my body was soaked in sweat and blood than not. Preparing for an uncertain future, the best I could do in the present was something similar to mercenary life. If the world were guaranteed to be damn safe, honestly, all I would want is to lie around at home and sleep. But at the same time, it was enjoyable too. Earning and spending money with my own strength, meeting new people in the process, and feeling my body grow. Because of that, I had no choice but to answer with one corner of my mouth raised.
“Yeah, it was more fun than I thought.”
“…Is that so.”
Right after hearing my answer, my father replied indifferently. He unfolded his arms, which had been leaning against the door, and walked out into the living room. ‘Did he come all the way to my room just to ask that?’ I tilted my head at his retreating back as he left the room so cleanly, but without time to dwell on my father's feelings, I finished dressing and headed for the entrance.
When I stepped outside, the leisurely winter midday of Pardin village came into view. Maybe because I had set down the burden that had worried me the most, I actually felt a little lighter. …Was that why? Perhaps I had been underestimating a woman's pent-up anger.