The Spirit's Forest - 01
The rattling sound of the carriage was quite steady.
I thought the farewell in Elvenheim had been truly splendid, at least in my own mind.
Everyone had waved their hands to see us off, and we believed we had been properly welcomed and properly departed.
Thinking back, it seemed like something like this had happened before, but back then I had no leisure to witness it, so I could not wave back to the person who waved at me.
That was why this time I had waved properly and said my farewells, promising a future meeting.
Now, for the evening, everyone had gotten off the carriage.
The men had moved out to hunt for food and deal with the monsters in the area, leaving only the women behind.
“Still, I’ll go with you as far as the halfway point, Olivia.”
“Yeah…”
I answered Lilith’s words with a casual tone.
“Olivia? Are you all right?”
“No, yeah. I’m fine. It’s not like my condition is bad.”
Just.
Before leaving Elvenheim, it had been the first time Lois approached me.
It had been extremely stimulating.
It had only been that our faces had gotten a little closer, and I had thought he was about to kiss me on his own.
But it had been the first time I recognized someone as the opposite sex.
And it had been the first time my head had turned completely white from getting that close.
“The smell is coming out.”
“Titania?”
Titania, who had been sitting in the carriage, approached me and Lilith, who was lighting the fire, and smiled.
It was a completely different person from the Titania I had seen in Elvenheim.
Was she really giving up so much because a successor had been born?
“What smell?”
“The smell of love.”
“Ah, eh…”
“Youngness is nice. Love is even better.”
“But Titania’s love is…”
“Olivia, you are sometimes lacking in awareness.”
“Hah, I often get pointed out by Lois too.”
“Actually, everyone would point it out. You have good intuition, but why no awareness, Olivia?”
Should I say I had never valued others’ feelings that much?
Actually, I had never valued my own feelings much either.
After all, living while treating such feelings lightly had made those things somewhat dull and awkward.
“Indeed, all my loves were tragic. I lost both husbands.”
If it had been Sylphy’s grandfather, I could have guessed why I lost him without asking.
It had been during the war, so it was possible enough.
But why had Rayna’s father died?
“By the way, Rayna’s father and my second husband was killed by a monster. He was a personality that couldn’t stay in one place from the beginning, it seems he passed that on to Rayna.”
“…”
“…”
What to do with this atmosphere?
I had loved twice, but both had ended tragically, so I didn’t know what words to use to console.
According to the evaluations of the people around me, I lacked awareness, so I wouldn’t be able to give words that fit such consolation, and I might even stir up anger instead, so I decided to keep my mouth shut here.
Sometimes silence was the wisest choice.
“Indeed, I didn’t end my two loves happily.”
Titania gazed at the bonfire and smiled faintly.
“But I have no regret for having loved.”
“…”
“Waa, what a romantic line! Titania!”
Lilith was weak to such things.
Romantic.
Romance.
She especially liked those.
Of course, if I asked if I didn’t like them, I liked them.
I had secretly read hero-like books from my father, my eyes sparkling, and thought I wanted to become a person like the hero in the book.
But unfortunately, my young self had been quickly caught and it had been too much, like going mad.
I couldn’t think at that time that one book was really too much.
Hmm.
Ah.
Thinking about it, wasn’t my family environment completely messed up?
It was really fresh, but I had such a question.
Lois had also said last time that my life was the fault of a person who cursed my life, and if that curse was not the Curse of the God of Death but a psychological curse, then besides family, nothing came to mind.
“So, it’s good to choose who to love well.”
“I chose well.”
I answered without hesitation.
“…”
“…”
This time, Titania and Lilith became quiet at the same time, excluding me.
“Honestly, it’s straightforward and honest, it might be seen as a disadvantage depending on the person, but it’s definitely an unchangeable advantage.”
“Olivia has been like that since the old days. By the way, Olivia, can I call you Livy too?”
“No.”
“Why?”
“Only Lois should call me that.”
“…”
“…”
She looked at me with a subtle gaze again.
That gaze, somehow, it would be nice if she stopped because it was a bit irritating.
Lilith said with a smile.
“Do you like it that much?”
“When I open my eyes, the first thing I think and wake up. And conversely, when I close my eyes, I think and fall asleep. … I wish there was someone next to me, and I hope I don’t see other women.”
“…”
“I want to be a special person to Lois as well.”
“Lois seems to have enough favor.”
“Well…”
I didn’t know.
I had told him I recognized him as the opposite sex, but whether he said it to tease me or sincerely, I couldn’t tell from my side.
But I could positively evaluate that saying such words increased favor compared to before, but probably that emotion was still a subtle feeling to call it love.
“Lois is a good person, so… if I had fallen on the floor, even if it wasn’t me, he would have helped.”
Ironically, I fell for such a person, and because of that, I confessed immediately.
If I had been special to the person who helped me, maybe he would have tried to get the confession somehow, but since it wasn’t,.
I was just one of the many people Lois helped.
Just as Lois wouldn’t see the person I saved as the hero specially, he wouldn’t either.
So, I had to try.
Today.
Tomorrow.
Every day.
Just loving more than one day.
Unfortunately, I had no right or qualification to stop Lois, so if Lois said he loved another woman, there was nothing I could do.
I could say to burst this emotion and cry and ask him to choose me, but that wouldn’t be possible.
If I really loved, I should hope he was happy.
Otherwise, the love I was holding now would definitely turn into obsession.
I didn’t want my love to turn into obsession and change my whole world to Lois.
I didn’t want to become a weak woman.
Surely Lois wouldn’t like such a woman.
I wanted to love as I was.
“Young.”
“Titania?”
“Such love worries are good. But as far as I see, it seems you have no heart at all.”
“Y, yeah?”
“I, I do too! Olivia! After all, Olivia is so pretty? Moreover, she’s kind! Surely even if not love, there must have been moments when your heart was moved.”
“W, well? Maybe. I guess so, yeah.”
Compared to when we first met, showing somewhat emotional reactions, the favor was clearly there.
Whether it was rational emotion or not, I couldn’t be sure, but there was no doubt that she was treating me well.
“Ah, love stories are nice. Especially Olivia is the hero? I want to write that love story. I want to write your story with Lois as a book.”
“I don’t mind.”
“You can easily give permission like that?”
“If Lois is okay, I can.”
“Really?”
“Have you written the book?”
“Ah, yes. It’s not to show to others, but I wrote it as a hobby sometimes. Only Olivia, Felix, and Sebas were the readers, but there were only three.”
“If I become the fourth, that would be good.”
“W, well… It’s not a work that can be shown to Titania.”
“It’s okay, any work has flavor.”
Because each word of language felt intelligent, and if I spoke, the difference in intelligence would feel, so I kept my words.
Why couldn’t I make such wonderful words?
I should have studied how to speak.
“Lilith.”
“Yes.”
“Do you think Sylphy fits the mold of a king?”
“…”
“Um, well. As a result of living together, there are somewhat timid parts. I can’t determine if he has the king’s mold or not.”
Lilith said while putting the kindling into the bonfire.
“Sylphy is a good person.”
“Hmm.”
Titania thought for a moment and said.
“Let’s be honest.”
“Yes.”
“You have almost no claim to the throne, right?”
“Yes, I don’t even think about it. It’s a troublesome position, I’ll give it to Felix.”
“But you are royalty, so you can’t avoid the engagement position for the kingdom.”
“That’s right.”
“Then, how about trying with Sylphy?”
“…”
Lilith was silent for a moment.
“I won’t say to get married right away. I wish I could, but it’s the law that men and women decide among themselves. First, the engagement… No, hmm. If that engagement is broken, it would be a nuisance in its own way.”
“Hey, wait…! It’s too fast!?”
“Is Sylphy not to your liking?”
“…”
“Oh, it seems you have no heart at all.”
I didn’t have much awareness, but I had to respond to Lilith’s silence here.
Lilith’s personality was to clearly say it wasn’t the case.
Thinking that way, something suddenly came to mind.
“By the way, Sylphy saved the one that was about to fall, right?”
“Y, yeah…”
“At that time, I was a little excited, but since it was a girl, I was disappointed, but then I realized it’s a boy? I was thinking ‘this is okay, right?’”
“…I don’t want to admit that I fell for a woman at first sight.”
“No, it’s a man.”
“I haven’t seen below yet, so I don’t know.”
“Somehow, this conversation seems like I had it before…”
Anyway, it seemed it wasn’t like there was no heart at all.
If this was the case, for the Sylphy side…
Wipe.
Thinking about it, I didn’t think about becoming king, I didn’t think about engagement, but it seemed the conversation was proceeding freely in the place Sylphy didn’t know.
Was this right?
Honestly, I didn’t know.