Especially From Today
"…It's so good."
"Feeling a little better?"
"Yeah…"
Cecilia nodded, cradling the large mug carefully in both hands. Inside it, a citrus-colored liquid glowed with a soft, luminous sheen.
…It wasn't alcohol. Just orange juice.
"…Can I have one more?"
"Okay."
I took the empty cup she held out and headed for the fridge. The moment we'd gotten home, Cecilia had flopped face-down onto the bed and wriggled there, utterly spent. My prescription for that bone-deep exhaustion had been juice — something sweet to take the edge off the fatigue, at least a little.
"Here."
"Thanks…"
A cute little sound followed — ah-um, gulp.
I found myself staring at her for a moment. Cecilia shot me a sidelong glance, looking embarrassed.
"Whyyy…"
"No reason. Just looking."
I turned my head away, a little flustered myself. That I'd nearly said you're pretty out loud was a secret I'd take to the grave.
"S-so. What happened today?"
I cleared my throat and took the emptied cup again, heading back to the fridge to refill it. Cecilia let out a soft "Mmm~…" while she waited, then opened her mouth once I held the cup out to her.
"……Chaos?"
"Cha— what?"
"Yeah…"
A small gulp sounded.
"We went into the building, gathered in the auditorium, got the orientation and classroom assignments…"
"Uh-huh."
"Then we went into the classroom and had, how do I put it… an introduction session? And…"
"…The reaction was a little too intense?"
"Yeah…"
She said it with her fluffy ears and tail drooping limply. Just as Donggeon hyung had predicted… she'd been the star of the show. Though if I had to guess, the popularity had gone well past "a bit much" and straight into crushing, overwhelming territory. She was a beastkin, and a beautiful one at that, so…
…Either way, looking at how drained she was — barely able to hold herself up — I could more or less imagine how thoroughly she'd been put through the wringer.
"Hwaaah…"
She set the cup down with a soft scrape and collapsed onto the bed in a heap of pure exhaustion. The mattress bounced; her shirt rode up a little. She didn't even notice the strip of bare stomach showing through the gap — just lay there staring blankly at the ceiling.
"Nnngh…"
Then, like a sleepy cat, she started nuzzling her face into the blanket. She squirmed and wriggled, then grabbed a pillow and hugged it tightly to her chest.
"…Hoo."
She looked exhausted and comfortable all at once. I watched her quietly, waiting for the rest of the story. After a brief stretch of silence, Cecilia spoke again.
"…Still, the teacher did tell everyone ahead of time not to talk to me during the first period after introductions, if they could help it."
"Smart teacher."
"Thanks to that, I was fine for a while, but…"
She mumbled into the pillow.
"…Everything after that was hell."
"Haha…"
I could more or less picture it. Fiddling with the edge of the pillow she was hugging, she went on.
"Are those ears real, do they have feeling, is your hearing super good, blah blah…"
"…"
As I listened, I rested a hand lightly on top of Cecilia's head. When I started stroking slowly, she let out a soft "Nnngh" as if it tickled. Her eyes drifted shut. She was accepting my touch with a peaceful expression.
"…The ones who asked if they could touch them just once were the most common."
She spoke up suddenly while I was petting her. I asked quietly,
"Touch what — your ears?"
"My ears and my tail."
At that, I glanced toward her ears and tail. Soft fur. A beautiful silver-white that called moonlight to mind. Fluffy and silky — anyone could tell it would feel wonderful to stroke. Girls who loved soft things, of course, and packs of boys with less pure intentions would have swarmed her. Hardly surprising.
"I turned them all down, though."
"Oh, you did?"
"Of course…"
Still with her eyes closed, she answered — and whether consciously or not, she nudged her head a little further into my hand as she did. It was adorable and a little disorienting at the same time.
"I can't just let people touch them however they want…"
"…"
At those words, I flinched and stopped my hand, which had been slowly drifting toward her ear. As I carefully pulled it back away, Cecilia cracked her eyes open into narrow slits and looked at me.
"…Do you want to touch them?"
"Uh, well, thaat…"
The sudden question left me stumbling over my words.
Did I want to touch them? Her ears?
Of course I did. I'd stroked them a few times before, but coincidentally every single time had been when she was drunk. Meaning I couldn't properly remember the sensation. I remembered that it had felt amazing — but not the actual texture itself. It was maddening.
And besides, what kind of person could look at a pair of cute, twitching cat ears right in front of their face and not want to touch them? Her tail swayed gently the whole time; her ears flicked and perked. Even on ordinary days, I always wanted to touch them. I'd spent every day holding that urge down.
Because if I did, Cecilia would hate it—
"…Just this once. Specially."
"Huh? …?!"
Suddenly a soft sensation brushed against my palm. Cecilia flinched too, letting out a cute little "Nngh…" as she pushed her ear into my hand. A tiny ear that fit perfectly in one palm twitched faintly against my skin.
"…Gently."
"Y-yeah."
I was flustered, but the thought that I couldn't waste this chance was stronger. I started moving my hand — as slowly and gently as I could. Savoring the outer texture, stroking at a leisurely pace…
"Ohh…"
An involuntary sound of wonder slipped out. "Soft" alone didn't even begin to cover it.
First of all, it was warm. The living warmth of a living body came straight through my palm. Warm and cozy. It felt like happiness itself. And along with that warmth, every fine strand of fur tickled my hand. Soft enough that I unconsciously drew in a breath. No luxury silk, no blanket in the world could compare. It was so good it nearly made me lose my mind.
"Hoo, nngh…"
The soft, breathy sounds she made with every stroke lightly scrambled my reason. Whether from the ticklishness or something else, the way Cecilia flinched each time I moved was almost unbearably cute. What if I stroked a little harder? What kind of reaction would I get if I gave even a gentle squeeze? She was so captivating that desires I'd only ever kept in my imagination started poking their heads up.
"…Hoo."
I exhaled softly and pulled my hand away. Any more and I wasn't sure I could hold back. It wasn't just the feel of her ear. The scattered breaths, the flinching body — all of it was far too cute. How was I supposed to put this… right.
I wanted to nibble her.
"…Satisfied?"
"A dream come true."
"R-really?"
"It wasn't that big a deal…" she muttered, pouting a little in embarrassment. I pressed a hand to my forehead over the words that had tumbled out of my mouth unbidden.
A dream come true. Seriously. It was a nice thing to say, but not exactly the kind of line you drop after petting a girl's ears…
"So, uh."
Sensing the atmosphere starting to turn awkward, I hurried to speak. Cecilia, who had been shyly fiddling with her own ear, turned her head toward me.
"Why'd you suddenly let me stroke them? You always hated it before."
Half an attempt to clear the air, half genuine curiosity. Even when she was drunk and her guard was down, Cecilia almost never gave permission for her ears. Touch them without asking and she'd swat at you. And for the record, those weren't playful little taps… well, they looked playful from the outside, but they actually hurt quite a bit.
Anyway — she'd always let me stroke her head, but never her ears. So why had she volunteered them this time? Had something happened at school? When I asked with that in mind, she answered lightly.
"Mmm, just… a belated thank-you?"
"A thank-you?"
I echoed, puzzled. A thank-you? She went on, watching me tilt my head.
"How do I put it. After going to school today… I guess I realized all over again how comfortable this place is."
With a little "upsy," she pushed herself upright. Sitting side by side with me on the bed, she glanced my way. Our eyes met for a moment. Then she smiled softly.
"It's warm here. Comfortable. I don't get tense."
"…That's embarrassing."
"But it's true."
Those pure eyes, that gently spreading smile — they were dazzling. Feeling a shyness I couldn't quite put into words, I looked away a little.
"So I just… um. Suddenly wanted to do something in return! That's all."
She said it brightly, and the mattress bounced. I glanced over and saw Cecilia standing up.
"Ah-um…"
She reached for the table, drained the rest of the orange juice, and let out a satisfied "Pwah…"
"…From now on, you can stroke my ears whenever you want."
At the words that followed, I swallowed hard. She spoke to me as I stared with wide eyes.
"It's my way of saying thanks. Since I'm going to keep relying on you…"
Her voice grew quieter toward the end. But it was still loud enough that I caught every word.
"…I'll stroke them every day."
"Not every day!"
I said it playfully, and got an equally playful retort. In the suddenly lightened atmosphere, we smiled at each other.
"…Yeah! This juice is really good."
"Want another glass?"
"Mmm~. No, I'm good. More importantly, Eunhyuk — will you listen? So today at school…"
We chatted back and forth in soft voices. Being together was fun. It was a moment that made me feel that truth all over again.