Chapter 65
There are some things money can't overcome. Taxes, death, and hair loss.
"I've never seen a man that worked up before."
A bald billionaire is passionately testifying at a US Senate hearing, his scalp flushed red.
"I... see. Thank you."
The senator sitting across from him, older but sporting a full head of hair, tries to smooth over the awkward atmosphere.
Hmm... people without hair loss really can't empathize with those who have it.
"Can't a rich guy like him just get a hair transplant?"
It varies by person, but there can be side effects for 3–4 months. Compared to that, our ampoule has none of that, right? It just itches a little while the hair grows.
Seeing a man with wealth and fame risk becoming an internet meme and getting publicly ridiculed just because he lacks hair — all while passionately arguing at a hearing — I can't help but feel a pang of pity.
"What do you think will happen?"
Without intervention, the import ban won't be lifted anytime soon. The Big Pharma companies are foaming at the mouth...
The argument they're pushing is that directly inducing cell division falls outside the classification of cosmetics, so it should be reclassified as a new drug requiring long-term clinical trials.
"Even if I bend over backwards to understand the import ban, what the hell is their deal with getting the ampoules through the back door for themselves?"
They got paid, so they do their jobs — but their own hair is precious too. The official import route is blocked, but the rate of people coming into the country to buy it is steadily increasing. The fact that they haven't closed the gray area shows they know a complete ban is impossible.
There's heated debate about the import ban itself. Hair loss sufferers are screaming, "There are no reported side effects and it's not even a drug, so why the hell are they making a fuss?" Meanwhile, people with full heads of hair argue that the performance is too extreme and we don't know what side effects might exist, so we should wait and let it come through proper clinical procedures.
The EU can't launch due to purely procedural issues, and other countries are stepping back to watch for now.
"Hmph, seems like there's some misunderstanding. Who said we're launching?"
I can't help but laugh watching them drink their own bathwater before we've even announced a global release.
"What are the pros and cons of exporting versus not exporting?"
First, if we proceed with exports, the advantage is obviously market accessibility. We could earn tens of trillions of won in just a few days.
"And the disadvantages?"
Nothing in this world comes without a price.
We'd have to adapt to their complex legal frameworks and tariff barriers. It would take enormous amounts of money and time to navigate all the approval processes and political entanglements.
"And above all, we'd be lining the pockets of those bastards."
I could just use Athena to wipe them out, but there's no guarantee the next people in line would be any different. I can't keep doing that forever.
If we completely rule out global launch and only sell domestically... there's no major downside except for reduced book profits. On the contrary, we'd be in an absolute position of power.
"The only variable would be the Korean administrative system, and that's manageable."
Every country has its own weird system quirks, but Korea is definitely easier to control than the EU or US for sure.
We don't even need to lift a finger. If we only do business domestically, they'll have to come to Korea to get the product. That means astronomical amounts of foreign capital flowing in. Naturally, the government will have no choice but to favor us.
"Hair loss pilgrimage?"
The phrasing sounds weird, but there's no other way to describe it.
Something like that. They'll fly in on private jets, stay at hotels, and spend enormous amounts of money.
Listening to Athena, I wouldn't be surprised if CEO Han Jeong-woo ends up receiving an economic contribution award soon.
There's something I haven't reported yet. A lot of people are asking if there's a non-commercial version with enhanced performance — something not available on the open market.
"Rich and powerful people, I assume."
Yes. We haven't replied yet, but the inquiries keep piling up.
"Can you make a high-performance non-commercial version?"
It's possible by adjusting the formulation ratio. It's not dramatic, but the hair grows a bit faster.
"Then put that on hold for now and contact CEO Han. Tell him to postpone the global launch indefinitely."
Understood.
Han Jeong-woo couldn't hide his deep confusion upon receiving the notice that the global launch would be postponed indefinitely. As a professional manager with a duty to maximize returns for shareholders, he'd judged that entering the global market — even through complex procedures — was the better move.
"A VIP-exclusive clinic..."
He'd been offered a proposal: build a facility near Incheon Airport, or right in the heart of Gangnam, and run a business targeting overseas VIPs and celebrities. He accepted it.
"So we're not just selling a product — we're selling privilege."
No need to pour enormous resources into navigating the FDA's complicated approvals and political issues. If people want it badly enough, they'll fly here themselves.
Having organized his thoughts, Han immediately called his chief of staff.
"Look into acquiring a top-tier private hotel or related facility near Incheon Airport or Gangnam. Money is no object. And immediately establish a global VIP-exclusive reservation system with ironclad security."
"What should we set the treatment price at?"
"$100,000 per session. Payment must be upfront, in dollars only."
The chief of staff blinked for a moment at Han's words, then cautiously offered his opinion.
"Isn't that too expensive...?"
"To them, $100,000 doesn't even feel like spending money. If anything, if it's too cheap, they won't come. Proceed as instructed."
"$100,000?"
Yes, that's the cost per session at the comprehensive skincare clinic.
"I get that money burns a hole in their pockets, but spending that much on skincare and hair growth? Guess it doesn't feel wasteful to them."
As I muttered to myself, I realized it's not that different from how I whale on games. Suddenly it made sense.
Right now, over a thousand customers have already deposited $100,000 upfront and are on the waiting list.
"Busy people sure are diligent."
They probably sent someone to do it for them. What's more interesting is the reservation list. You'll recognize quite a few names.
Looking at the reservation list Athena pulled up, more well-known people than I expected had applied.
Additionally, I've already developed a few skincare products for use at the clinic.
"Non-commercial versions?"
Yes. And there are already a few companies that have started investigating to find the developer of the ampoule.
I don't need to look to know who started that.
"They're going to have a hell of a time looking for something that doesn't exist."
Between lobbying, hunting for people, and trying to reverse-engineer the formula, they must not have enough hours in the day.
"Sounds like they've been busy. Should I send them a gift to cheer them up?"
They say kindness begets kindness, but these pharmaceutical companies never sent kindness my way. Time to return the favor.
How far should we take it?
"Taking down their companies would be pointless — the federal government would step in. Just take down the executives."
I have records and evidence of embezzled research funds and concealed R&D failures. With this much, the companies will survive on fines, but the executives will all be wearing bracelets.
"And on top of that... make sure their personal assets go up in smoke too."
Understood. I'll compile everything and upload it all.
Three days later, an anonymous tip arrived at the Department of Justice.
It was a comprehensive gift basket containing deeply buried secrets from global pharmaceutical giants like Pfizer — embezzled research funds, systematic cover-ups of failed clinical trials, insider trading, and even bribery ledgers.
Joseph, an investigator from the DOJ's Criminal Division, stared at the screen in disbelief as he read through the materials.
"Is this... even possible?"
His desk neighbor Linda pointed at her own screen with a flustered expression.
"Joseph, look at this. It looks like R&D logs from their internal servers... They knew the treatment development had failed three years ago, and there's detailed evidence of accounting fraud to cover it up. There's even... a list of congressmen who received lobbying funds."
What landed on their desks wasn't a whistleblower's tip — it read like an investigation report from a professional law enforcement agency.
"Any idea who sent it?"
"No. We tried tracing it, but it led to a barbecue restaurant in Texas..."
Frankly, who sent it wasn't Joseph's concern. His only focus was that they now had enough evidence to drag the entire executive team to court.
"Linda. Contact the Southern District of New York immediately. Send a cooperation request to the FBI too."
This was the golden opportunity he'd dreamed of since childhood — to bring down a massive cartel.
"Today's Wednesday. I want search warrants by Friday. Got it?"
The tip hadn't just been sent to law enforcement — it had also been distributed to the media. Before they could even make their own announcement, major news outlets had already grabbed the bait and run with the story, making things awkward.
After asking his colleague to send the cooperation, Joseph grabbed his coat and sprinted out the door.
A few hours after the investigation agencies were thrown into chaos, the shockwave hit Wall Street directly. Athena had kindly sent the same gift basket not just to law enforcement, but to the inboxes of major media outlets and institutions worldwide.
"Christmas is still months away, but everyone got their presents early."
Once I threw them good bait, the media went wild like fish in water, churning out articles in competition with each other. The institutions moving massive capital were happily dumping pharmaceutical stocks into the market.
-10%|-16%|-20%
Unlike the Korean stock market, which has daily price limits for rises and falls, America told those safety measures to go to hell. This is a real man's club where only the strong survive. The stock prices of Pfizer and other giant pharmaceutical companies listed on the New York Stock Exchange started doing bungee jumps without ropes.
"At this rate, they might jump out a window before going to jail. That can't happen..."
They need to suffer long and hard. If they run off to the afterlife, that's seriously inconvenient.
They don't have the guts for that either. Judging by their behavior, they're probably trembling and screaming somewhere.
Right on cue, as Athena finished speaking, Pfizer's trading was halted.
"Ah... there they go."
During the preliminary investigation phase, I'd learned that the executives had been borrowing money from banks using their company shares as collateral to live quite lavishly. Looks like margin calls are about to hit, and they'll all be left holding empty bags.