Chapter 13. I don't feel like I'm doing anything, but things are moving along.

"You little shit!"

I was honestly dumbfounded by the old goblin's behavior, trying to start a contest of strength after swinging its club down. I wasn't exactly handsome, but I was 178cm tall. Could an old goblin that didn't even reach my chest really beat me in a strength contest?

Even if I didn't like exercising and had low muscle mass, it was clear I had more than this bastard, and that was indeed the case.

As I shoved the flail hard, the old goblin stumbled backward, throwing its hands up in the air from the position where it had swung its club. Since its belly was wide open, I quickly lifted my foot and kicked the goblin in the stomach.

"Kerrrr!"

The goblin screamed that it ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠was dying, fell flat on its back, and rolled over once. I followed up immediately, raised the flail to the top of my head, and swung it down.

But my aim was off, and I struck right next to the goblin's head.

"Ugh!"

The vibration coming from the handle was incredibly powerful, more than I expected, so I freaked out and pulled back. I thought my grip was going to tear.

In the meantime, the goblin that had fallen over jumped up and got back into position.

I was on the verge of post-nut clarity.

Why is this a fight?

The goblin was clearly an old goblin. And I was a young human male. The very fact that I was currently going toe-to-toe with this ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠old goblin was a humiliation to me. Wouldn't I lose to a young goblin?

Should I not mess with a young goblin?

The flail was heavier than I thought, too. I felt like I had swung it three or four times, and it was already starting to feel heavy. For instance, I had to use momentum to lift it. Swinging it made me realize that weapon mastery was filthily difficult and drained a lot of stamina.

Anyway, I don't know if it was because it was a life-or-death fight, but there were moments where I couldn't breathe properly and was panting.

The old goblin was the same, but this bastard didn't care about its own condition and mocked me as I panted.

"Kelkel!"

You son of a bitch?

"You're dead."

I thought I had gotten used to the experience of anger rising to the top of my head because I'd felt it a lot lately thanks to Choi Yeon-ju, but I was wrong. It turned out that the meter for that went up differently for each species. I might have been somewhat immune to human women doing it, but not goblins. It was even more unacceptable given that this bastard was a male much weaker than me.

I am the very definition of someone who bullies the weak and fears the strong. If I'm about to bump shoulders with a gym bro with a great physique, I'll move out of the way on my own. But if I'm about to bump shoulders with a woman, I'm the type of person who walks confidently.

Because I can beat women.

I can beat this goblin, too.

But it mocked me?

"Die!"

I grabbed the handle of the flail with both hands and rushed in. When I suddenly jumped in, I saw the goblin flinch, too. It seemed like that bastard knew, too. It might have mocked me, but it knew that if I rushed in, it would be in big trouble.

It was right.

That goblin was in big trouble.

Because I rushed in!

"Kiek!"

The goblin grabbed both ends of its club with both hands and lifted it above its head. It must have expected me to swing the flail from top to bottom. But the flail was a feint. I had hit the ground once earlier, so I couldn't bring myself to swing it down. If ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠I struck wrong, I felt like I would drop the flail this time, and if the goblin picked up that flail and used it instead of the club, I would be the one who was truly fucked.

I kicked the goblin's belly again with a front kick.

"Kuek!"

The goblin's waist bent into an 'L' shape. Something popped out of its mouth and soaked my pants. My body had been full of excitement from the fight, but the sensation of my pants getting damp was terrifying enough to give me goosebumps. It was even more so because it was bodily fluid that had spewed out of the goblin's mouth, on top of the fact that it was annoying to get wet.

"You son of a bitch!?"

The goblin fell over flat again. I wanted to make it roll around, but that wasn't possible. My strength was only at that level, after all.

But this time, I had the confidence that I could kill it for sure.

Because I had no intention of swinging the flail at its head.

"Die!"

The flail fell and struck the goblin's abdomen. With a Splat! sound, the goblin's protruding belly rippled. The goblin, having been properly struck in the belly by the flail, spewed out green fluid, not the yellowish liquid presumed to be saliva that it had spat out when I kicked its belly earlier. Instinctively, I knew that was blood.

These bastards really did have green blood, just like I had imagined.

That got on my pants, too.

"Ugh!"

I don't want to wear these pants anymore... I'll have to throw them away as soon as I get back. While I was thinking that, the goblin, which had been struck with all my might in the belly by the flail, trembled and went limp. Then it didn't move anymore.

Is it dead? I didn't bother thinking things like that. If you do that, it always comes back to life and attacks the protagonist who had let their guard down. Instead, what I did was swing the flail down once more on the head of the goblin that was lying motionless.

With a Crunch! sound, the goblin's head, which had been hit properly, caved in. It became a visual that made you want to vomit if you looked at it. My own face sometimes makes women pretend to vomit, but this bastard really looked like it would make me vomit.

Anyway, the fierce battle with the first goblin ended with my victory.

Although there was a more serious matter remaining.

Since there was no mirror, I didn't know what kind of expression I was making. But I knew this much. My face was currently turning dark and gloomy.

ㅡ

"I'm home..."

"...What is that? That state you're in. And... ugh... the smell..."

As I opened the mansion door and went inside, Choi Yeon-ju asked, frowning. I felt like crying. Even though I had risked my life at the Gate to collect the byproducts, the woman I considered practically my wife had this reaction when I came home.

I wondered if this was why married men cursed and told people not to get married.

"I fought a goblin."

"Did you lose, by any chance?"

"If I had lost, would I be here like this!"

"I say that because you look like a dog that lost a fight. If you aren't seriously injured, you could have survived and returned, assuming you ran away well."

"I won! I killed it!"

"Ah. Is that so?"

Choi Yeon-ju nodded as if she understood when I protested. That dry, emotionless reaction itself was infuriating. I didn't hear a single word asking if I was okay!

"Aren't you going to ask if I'm okay?"

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah. No."

"...What is it? I would appreciate it if you could pick one of the two."

"I'm not okay."

Do you know how I feel, having fondled a goblin's dick?

Do you know the sensation of whittling down a dick with a dagger?

I wanted to ask that, but I couldn't, because I felt like she would say she knew.

Then I would lose.

"Then, did you bring the Chaos Flower and the goblin's genitals?"

"Here."

I took off the small bag I had strapped to my waist and handed it to Choi Yeon-ju just like that. Normally, I would have taken them out and given her the contents, but not today. Inside that bag, along with the Chaos Flower, were the goblin's penis and testicles. Enduring that stench once was enough.

Since they had been stewing in the bag, it was certain that the stench would be worse, not better.

As if my prediction was correct, Choi Yeon-ju opened the bag I handed her without thinking, then scrunched up her face and pulled her head back. The shape of the hand holding the bag also changed. Originally, she had been holding it firmly with both hands, but now she was holding it dangling with just one thumb and index finger.

"Stinks, right?"

"Ughhh...."

"Kehehehe."

I had properly experienced something a normal person would never be able to do in their entire life today. I could confidently say that there was no one in this mansion who had suffered more than me. However, seeing Choi Yeon-ju even scrunch up her face and shudder, that pain and resentment washed away like magic, and a cheerful feeling began to overflow.

I couldn't be the only one suffering.

"Look closely. Is that how you're supposed to cut them off?"

"Yes, that's right. But. Could you please close this? I absolutely cannot close it with my own hands."

"No. I feel like I'm going to vomit right now, too? Look at my clothes. They're covered in the saliva and blood that bastard spilled. I need to wash up."

My argument was correct. The stench coming from the bag was one thing, but the stench coming from my body was no joke, either. The blood didn't matter. The saliva that splashed when I kicked its belly was the problem. The smell of the goblin's mouth-shit was beyond imagination. To the point where I wondered if it really ate shit. Thanks to the smell coming from my pants, I couldn't even take a taxi or a bus.

I walked all the way here.

I felt the necessity of a private car deeply.

Choi Yeon-ju made a huffy expression, but she didn't say anything more after seeing my state. She just nodded and pointed to the bathroom with her finger. This stench was of a kind that even Choi Yeon-ju couldn't endure. I quickly nodded and ran toward the bathroom.

I heard Choi Yeon-ju's voice from behind.

"Scrub hard. Especially hard today!"

"I know that!"

I had intended to scrub hard today even if it meant my skin would peel off.

ㅡ

When I came out after scrubbing properly, Choi Yeon-ju had taken the goblin's genitals out in the kitchen and was examining them.

"Why are you looking at that in the kitchen...?"

"Since secretions come out, wouldn't it be better to be close to water? So we can wash it immediately."

"Was it okay to wash it?"

"Everything that was attached to the genitals in an unwashed state has already been sampled. In the first place, goblin genitals are not items that are difficult to obtain if you are there."

I nod at Choi Yeon-ju's words. That was certainly true.

"Is this also a prohibited item?"

"Hmm? This is not a prohibited item. And it's more expensive than you think."

"...This isn't a prohibited item?"

"Because there are one or two couples in the world who are stressed by sexual intercourse."

"Ah."

I see. I was embarrassed to death thinking about rape drugs or something with the efficacy of goblin genital fluid. It was certainly plausible that there would be demand for such things.

But because of that, I couldn't help but ask this.

"Then, instead of me having to fight a goblin and cut off its dick, couldn't I have just bought it from the start?"

"What are you talking about. In the first place, only women can buy that. And it's a drug that requires a prescription. Do you think they would just let it be sold willy-nilly?"

"You're a woman. It doesn't seem like it would be impossible to get that prescription if you threw a tantrum at the hospital."

Honestly, isn't that true? When I asked, Choi Yeon-ju opened her mouth with a look that said she was dumbfounded.

"I am Choi Yeon-ju. Choi Yeon-ju, the Research Director of the Daehan Hunter Association. I'm a more famous person than you think. If I were to get that prescribed and purchased at a hospital? ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠The next day, there would be an uproar that Choi Yeon-ju bought sex drugs."

"So you're saying your reputation is more important than my life right now?"

"That's not it, but it means there's that side to it, too. Besides, what we need is not the goblin's fluid."

"Then why did you say the goblin fluid makes women feel good?"

"It was just motivation. How did you feel when you heard that?"

"........"

I couldn't make any protest because the words I said to the goblin at the Gate came to mind.

When I shut my mouth, Choi Yeon-ju smirked as if she had expected that. I felt a sense of humiliation, but it would be my loss if I tried to pick a fight over this here. I couldn't say anything.

"Drugs made from fluid are consumables. Of course, we need that too for now, so I'll make a few, but the ultimate goal is your modification."

"...Huh?"

What did I just hear?

"What?"

"Your modification, I mean. Why go through the trouble of using drugs? The fluid that makes women go crazy, unique to goblins. Once we know exactly where and how that comes out, wouldn't it be better to just modify your own genitals? No need to make it, your body will produce it on its own. How simple and certain is that?"

"Are you saying you're going to cut off my dick and attach a goblin dick there?"

"If you attach it like that, the person dies. Haven't you heard of immune rejection?"

"As expected, right?"

A sigh of relief escaped me automatically. If Choi Yeon-ju had nodded at my question, honestly, I don't know. I might have just run away, Choi Yeon-ju or not.

Choi Yeon-ju might not know, but I know what the owner of that dick looked like.

If that old goblin's dick became my dick, I... I...

"Absolutely can't do that."

"What do you mean?"

"No. Just talking to myself."

Choi Yeon-ju tilted her head, but I had absolutely no intention of telling her.