Chapter 111: I Don't Want to Give Up
Translator: RaidenTL
Chapter 111: I Don't Want to Give Up
Erembalt was on his way to the Rosnova estate.
Leaning back inside the carriage, he reassured himself, 'Yes, this is for the best.'
He was convinced that his decision to declare a total break from Ferda was the right one. He had spent the last few days losing handfuls of hair, unable to withstand Erdes’s scrutiny and constant pressure. Now that he had received confirmation that Ferda no longer had anything to do with him, they were effectively strangers.
In fact, in the eyes of the world, Erembalt would be remembered as the victim in all of this.
"I won't have to deal with that damn brat ever again. This is enough."
"What brat?"
"Gah!"
Erembalt jumped at the sound of the familiar voice.
He was inside a moving carriage. The seat opposite him should have been empty. Instead, a teenage girl sat there, lounging comfortably.
She had platinum-blonde hair and blue eyes shimmering with dense mana. It was Erdes Roton—President of the Serdes Magic Society, a living disaster, and a self-proclaimed magical delinquent.
"Why are you looking at me like that?" She grinned like a mischievous child. "Why don't you repeat what you just said? I'm curious to hear it, too."
"I—I have committed a grave sin! To speak so insolently of the President—"
"Do you think I'm here to hear a confession for some trivial backstabbing?"
She was famous for holding long grudges, but Erdes hadn't come for something so petty.
"Tell me what you talked about with the Regent."
"It wasn't much of a conversation, I assure you."
"Not much? If it was nothing, then why are the Regent and a servant of Valdrova traveling together?"
Erembalt froze. "Wh-where are they going?"
"I don't know. Based on the direction, it looked like they were heading toward the Rosnova estate." She smirked. "Maybe he's going to wipe out the family himself?"
Erembalt’s face went deathly pale. Cold sweat poured down his neck. Seeing his extreme reaction, Erdes, who had been talking nonsense just to needle him, became flustered in turn.
"What? Why that reaction?"
"It's... it's nothing."
"Like hell it is. You're reacting like that because you think I'm right, aren't you? It sounds like some very intense words were exchanged."
"It's nothing! I simply spoke with Regent Ferda and told him he no longer has any relation to the family. He just... he overreacted on his own."
"...What?"
Hearing this, Erdes didn't smirk or get angry. She simply stared at Erembalt with a blank, hollow expression. That silence was far more terrifying than her temper.
"As I said, I informed him that Regent Ferda does not share our blood. Aside from his gray hair, he doesn't resemble us in the slightest."
"Hmm. So you disowned him?"
"That is correct."
"Hmm..."
Erdes merely tapped her chin with her index finger. Erembalt felt the suffocating need to break the uncomfortable silence.
"And... it is certain that Ferda uses black magic."
"...Why?"
"When I told him I was cutting ties, he used black magic to manifest a hand! He tried to strangle me!"
Erembalt pretended not to have noticed the deeper truth of the situation. He was certain that if he had shown he knew the reality of Ferda's power, he would have died on the spot.
Her eyes shifted slightly. "So, did he strangle you?"
"He didn't... he withdrew it... but still..."
"How sweet of him."
"Pardon?"
Erembalt was bewildered. This woman, who supposedly hated black magic more than anyone, seemed completely indifferent to its use.
"I'm saying it's sweet of him not to strangle a father who's disowning him."
No, she was doing more than that—she was defending him. Erembalt felt compelled to ask her directly.
"What do you intend to do about Regent Ferda?"
"What do you mean 'do'? I'm not going to do anything."
"Even though he tried to kill me with black magic?"
"Yeah. Whether you die or not doesn't mean a damn thing to me."
The young woman let out a long, arrogant sigh.
"Ah, seriously... I've been swinging and missing so much lately that I'm starting to feel a real sense of self-loathing. Heaven truly helps that brat, doesn't it?"
Erdes stood up.
"I'm sick of you. Stay out of my sight from now on. If I catch you pulling any more stunts, even I don't know what I'll do to you. Got it?"
"Yes... I shall live... in humility."
As if he wasn't even worth another word, she vanished. Silence returned to the carriage.
"Whew..."
Erembalt instinctively placed a hand on his neck. Only after confirming his head was still attached did he let out a shaky sigh of relief. He felt a flicker of guilt for casting aside his son, but it vanished like a passing breeze.
Regardless of the cost, he was simply relieved that he would never have to face that delinquent or that foul thing ever again.
* * *
The Office of the President, Serdes Magic Society.
A circular gate opened, and Erdes stepped out. Sitting in the President's chair, naturally handling the paperwork, was her secretary, Lu.
"Where did you run off to this time, leaving all your work behind?" Lu asked, his eyes shadowed by deep dark circles.
Erdes snapped her head around and glared at him. "I was out laying the groundwork in the Far East. Why?"
"I thought you hated that Regent?"
"I do, for fuck's sake. I'm acting like a total idiot."
Erdes threw herself onto the sofa, cursing under her breath. It had been a good idea to incite the workers and form a union to create an opposing force against Ferda. However, the opponent was far more formidable than she had imagined.
"Stephan Pascal—wasn't that guy supposed to be a loser?"
"He's the future head of the Pascal Trading Company."
"What?" Erdes looked up, her face showing she was hearing this for the first time. "Since when? Weren't there two other formidable competitors?"
"How long has it been since you checked the news? The eldest daughter vanished to a western village with her husband, and the eldest son caused a scene about wanting independence before handing over the management rights of the mercenary company to Stephan."
"Why didn't I know about this?"
"Because you've never cared about that sector."
"Why didn't you tell me?"
"Because you've never cared about that sector."
Erdes glared at him venomously. Lu looked troubled but stood his ground.
"Uh... is this my fault?"
"If you're a secretary, shouldn't you handle things cleanly on your own? Even if I say I'm not interested, you should shove it in my face and tell me to look at it just once!"
"What is this, a mother trying to feed a baby? Fine, I get it. I'll start learning mind-reading magic immediately," Lu replied with a look of utter disbelief.
"And Erembalt!" Erdes growled. That was the second thing bothering her. "I didn't realize he was such a coward. A man from a knightly family, terrified of a single mage?"
"Everyone who wasn't terrified ended up dead at your hands, President. You have to understand."
"Even so, does it make sense to cast aside your own son?"
"Didn't he say they don't share the same blood? Besides, he has two perfectly fine sons. And considering he was willing to offer the boy up as a sacrifice before, it's a bit late for him to start showing fatherly affection now."
Erdes crossed her arms and grumbled discontentedly. "Still, if you've lived together for eighteen years, shouldn't there be some kind of bond? If it were me, I would have felt something for the time we spent together."
Lu’s eyes widened in horror. "You, President?"
"What? You got a problem with that? Do you think the reason you're still alive after talking back to me so much is because you're talented?"
Lu backed down, whimpering.
"Anyway, I couldn't even find a weakness. If there had been even a shred of fatherly love or a bond, I could have used it as leverage to blackmail that brat..."
Instead, she had only learned how wretched his life had been. Erdes didn't like that one bit.
"Lu."
"Why are you calling me that?"
"Am I really that bad at judging people?"
"Have you finally opened your eyes to the truth?"
"Do you really want to die?"
"If I'm being serious... no, you're not very good at it."
"The Society is running well, isn't it? Is that because I'm doing a good job?"
"It's because people know you'll take their heads off if it doesn't run well. It feels like it's running because everyone is terrified."
"Hmm, so that's how it was. I see. I suppose I need to make some changes."
"Yes. Why don't you reorganize the personnel and do a complete sweep? Just like you did when you hired me."
When Lu made the suggestion subtly, Erdes stared intently at his face.
"No matter what you say, I'm never releasing you from your life sentence as my secretary."
"Dammit."
Lu, the secretary to the President of the Magic Society, failed his escape attempt yet again today.
* * *
After confessing his anxieties, Ferda returned to his duties. The wound left by Erembalt had settled to some extent, but the aftereffects lingered in his mind as a gnawing uncertainty.
'Regardless, it is a fact that my power is unstable.'
It was unprecedented for his magic to be driven not just by his own emotions, but by the intervention of others. If it had been the Ferda from before his regression, he would have jumped at the chance to exploit this. To a mage with a Red Circle, other emotions were nothing more than brakes to be removed.
Ferda knew all too well the nature of that balance.
'Losing control leads to tragedy.'
He would end up going against Valdrova’s will, and Ruri, as her attendant, would surely make him pay for his sins. Being killed by Ruri’s hand would undoubtedly be a tragedy.
'But what would be even more tragic...'
...was the possibility of him killing Ruri in return when she came for him.
'If I were to kill the only child Valdrova trusts...'
The sense of isolation Valdrova must have felt surged vividly within him. After the Dragon-Demon War, she had lived for 150 years carrying guilt and loneliness. But there had been a sliver of hope. Valdrova knew that Ruri was still on her side.
In his past life, that woman had disappeared. That meant there had been no one left in Valdrova’s life—only despair.
'I would have gone mad long ago.'
Yet, she hadn't. In the end, she had even given her heart to the Ferda who hated her. It wasn't a surrender born of despair, but a new hope born of a final sacrifice.
'How could I...'
How could he leave such a woman alone? How could he hurt her? It felt as though she was holding onto a rope thrown into a pit of despair, unaware that the rope was actually rotten. Instead of saving her, he would only leave her with deeper scars.
Just like the image of him strangling her in his dreams.
Don't be anxious.
Whenever he felt this way, a sweet voice would pierce his ears.
There's no reason to worry. You are strong. Just do what you're good at.
Ferda did not answer the voice. He ignored it and ignored it again until it subsided.
'I have to keep my wits about me.'
He had to steady his heart to avoid succumbing to the great temptation. Ferda Valdrova. Because he was a man who had always found an answer to everything, he chose to believe he could find one this time as well.
'In the worst-case scenario...'
He could simply give up his life as a mage. That would be far better than carrying a bomb that could explode at any moment.
'But if I do that, what will I have left?'
Ruri had demanded one thing of him: to be a fiancé worthy of Valdrova’s status. Contrary to his hope that things would improve with time, he only realized how insignificant he truly was. All he possessed was some meager information about the future and his knowledge of magic. By the criteria Ruri desired, he was a failure.
It was a dire situation. The moment he abandoned one side, the balance would shatter, and everything would collapse.
He didn't want to give up. Just as she had never given up on him no matter the circumstances, Ferda did not want to give up on her.
Thump!
A vibration large enough to shake the entire castle rang out.
'Valdrova’s blood energy?'
No. The amplitude traveling through his feet was different. This was a vibration originating from within the castle. It felt as though someone had caused a massive accident.
'Was there an experiment large enough to cause this much vibration?'
Ferda stood up and headed toward the research wing. The castle corridors were already filled with confused people.
"What was that noise?"
"We just came out to find out ourselves."
"Wasn't it an explosion from your lab?"
"Our lab isn't capable of producing an explosion of that magnitude."
The people most likely to be the culprits all looked utterly clueless. Ferda had also assumed it had happened in Burnell’s laboratory.
'If it wasn't here...'
There was only one other possibility for such an explosion.
"Lord Ferda."
Ruri arrived and reported.
"There was a massive movement of mana. The location is—"
"The library?"
"How did you know?" Ruri asked, narrowing her eyes. Her gaze held the unspoken question of whether he was the one responsible.
"If it wasn't here, Echidna is the only one capable of causing an explosion like that."
This week was her turn to look after Mori. Echidna would likely be in the library, savoring Mori’s presence.
He made his way to the library with Ruri. When they opened the doors, they saw the interior in a state of total chaos.
Mori was sitting there. She was silently going about her business, brushing aside papers that had fallen like late autumn leaves. She seemed completely unconcerned by the massive explosion.
"Mori."
Hearing her name, she stopped her pen and looked up. Even in this moment, her eyes shone with purity. No, she almost looked strangely relieved.
"What happened?"
Mori wrote her answer on a piece of paper.
- Echidna has dissipated.