Eighteen, and Winter (8)
Ajusshi wasn't moving. I'd only popped one chocolate into his mouth, and suddenly he went rigid without a word, frozen solid.
"Ajusshi?" I peered right into his face.
No reaction.
"Ajusshi~?" I tried calling again.
His eyes seemed to be looking straight at me, but... something was off. I waved my hand right in front of him, but his expression didn't budge. His breathing was so quiet it was almost unnerving.
"Hey? You alive?"
No matter how much I called, there was no real response. Like he'd actually turned to ice. Not even a twitch in his pupils.
Did one chocolate send him over the edge? Just to be sure, I popped the last one into my mouth and chewed. Sweet and bittersweet, nothing weird about it. If anything, it tasted even better than the batch I'd made before—enough to put me in a good mood.
But Ajusshi had been stuck like that ever since he ate his, and his face was beet red. Maybe he had a fever?
"You... what are you doing right now..."
The moment I reached to check his forehead for heat, he finally reacted. We were so close I couldn't see his expression well, but his eyes definitely shook.
Not completely broken, then.
"Hold on a sec. Just checking if you've got a fever."
I grabbed his head like I was pulling him into a hug and pressed our foreheads together firmly. It felt a little hot.
"Huh?"
While we were forehead-to-forehead, it started feeling strangely hotter. Especially his ears, where my hands brushed—they were burning up. I pressed my forehead to his again more carefully and cupped his ear with my palm. Definitely hotter than his forehead.
"Seojin-ah..."
Ajusshi called out suddenly, but I didn't let go.
"Don't move. Still checking."
I said it seriously, and he drew in a short breath. Then his hand rose slowly, gently wrapping around my wrist.
Heat spread from my captured wrist. His hand was hot too.
"You really..."
Ajusshi stared at me for a long moment before dropping his gaze. I felt the slight pressure in the hand that had been holding my wrist ease away.
Why's he acting like this? Wondering, I leaned in to peer at his face more closely.
Then Ajusshi grabbed my shoulders. Not hard, but so abruptly that I startled. My chest suddenly flared hot.
"Ajusshi...?"
I called cautiously, ducking my head to check his face, and he slowly lifted his.
Our eyes met. It wasn't his usual laid-back look, or the tense expression he'd been wearing lately. Just pure, dead-serious intensity.
Facing that unfamiliar gaze, I tensed up without thinking. And weirdly, my chest grew even hotter.
"You... gonna keep making things hard for me...?"
I was speechless for a second.
Did I make things hard for Ajusshi? No matter how I thought about it, that didn't make sense. When had I ever made him uncomfortable? If anything, I'd always been careful not to cross lines or act out.
It just made me feel more indignant.
"When? When did I ever make things hard for you?"
I shot back without looking away.
Ajusshi just stared silently before letting out an incredulous sigh.
"You really asking 'cause you don't know?"
"Yeah, what is it?"
I lifted my head a bit higher. I really had no clue.
If I felt guilty about anything, I wouldn't be staring him down like this. I had nothing to hide.
"Ha..."
Seeing that, Ajusshi suddenly pulled his hands from my shoulders and rubbed his forehead.
"Why? Why stop mid-sentence?"
As I pressed him, he closed his eyes briefly, then looked at me again—like I was the absurd one. If anything, I was the baffled one now. What the hell?
"It's nothing."
"Nothing my ass. Just now—"
Before I could finish, his hand came up again. Not to my shoulder this time—to the top of my head.
"It's nothing, so don't worry about it."
As soon as he finished, the hand on my head started moving softly. It stroked my crown once, then his palm slid slowly down following the flow of my hair. The moment that warm touch hit my scalp, the tension melted from my shoulders. My chest grew hotter.
I'd been all geared up to argue just moments ago, but that urge vanished.
His hand kept going the whole time. Once, twice. No rush, nice and slow. My hair pressed down and sprang back, leaving a faint ticklish tingle.
"Uuuh..."
I let out a long breath without meaning to. My vision blurred a little, eyelids growing heavy. The eyes I'd been holding open rebelliously started drifting shut on their own. A few more warm strokes, and they were half-closed. The corners of my mouth tugged up unconsciously.
All the bad feelings seemed to have evaporated—I just wanted to stay still like this.
But then.
The hand stroking my head stopped abruptly.
"...Huh?"
Dazed, a wave of regret hit me late. The good feeling cut off so suddenly—it sucked. A sound slipped from my throat first.
"Uhng...!"
I shook my head. Pushed my crown toward his palm like I was nuzzling in closer on purpose.
"Ng... Ng!"
Shook harder this time. My hair rustled under his palm, pressing and releasing.
"Uuuht!"
Frowning, I mashed my head against his palm and shook. He had to get it by now.
His hand, paused for a moment, started moving again. Stroked the same spot a few more times, no hurry. I kept pressing my crown into it, giving little shakes of my head.
"Ng... Hng..."
It felt so good, even my breaths leaked out. Each time, I heard him swallow a few times. The rhythm of his strokes faltered just a bit. Still warm, but... something felt off.
"I'll... go grab some water real quick."
Ajusshi said that and pulled his hand away. Rustling sounds followed, then footsteps echoing across the living room floor.
Only then did I open my eyes properly. His back was already turned, heading toward the kitchen. So regrettable. With that warmth suddenly gone from my head, cool air seeped between my strands of hair.
I slapped both hands on my crown quick. Pressed down, hoping to hold onto a bit more of that heat. Warm. The spot where his hand had been still felt soft and lingering.
Right then, all my tension unraveled. Every bit of strain in my body—from shoulders to arms to fingertips—just slumped at once.
I couldn't hold back anymore. I flopped against the sofa and lay right back, spine sinking into the cushions. A little laugh slipped out unbidden.
Lying there on my back, I let out a breath. But I couldn't stay still. I grabbed the cushion beside me, hugged it tight to my chest, and slowly rolled across the sofa. Once to the left, once back the other way. The cushion squished against my belly and chest, arms going numb from the squeeze, but weirdly, I wanted to keep going.
I had no idea why. Was it because Ajusshi had gone to the kitchen? Or because that lingering warmth from his hand had sunk all the way to my chest?
The more I thought, the more my body kept moving. Then suddenly, a strange echo rippled from deep inside my chest.
What is this... feels so good...
That wasn't a thought I'd formed. It was like someone murmuring faintly inside me. But it rang crystal clear to me.
Weird—I paused for a second—but the more I focused on it, the more a smile crept onto my face. It was hot. So incredibly hot that nothing else registered. And it felt so good that I hugged the cushion tighter and rolled across the sofa again.
"You, what're you doing?"
I was mid-roll, clutching the cushion, when Ajusshi's voice came from the kitchen. I froze solid.
Before I even turned my head, heat bloomed right in the center of my chest. Hotter than before, somehow.
That was the moment. The voice echoed from inside again.
Won't do more...?
Would be nice if he stroked more...
I stopped rolling, still hugging the cushion, and looked up at Ajusshi from my lying position. He stood there with a glass of water, his expression awkwardly troubled—but smiling, which made it even stranger.
And I was strange too. Just like that inner voice, a wish bubbled up: I wanted more. More strokes. More warmth. I wanted my chest to burn even hotter.
"Ajusshi!"
I called out suddenly, and his eyes went wide.
"What's up... again?"
I shoved the cushion aside and, still lying on the sofa, spread my arms wide.
I had no clue why I was doing this—my brain hadn't decided anything—but my body moved first, my mouth too.
"Come on, touch me~! Hurry~!"