Fruit of Wisdom (7)
To move forward, one first needed to take a close look at what one already possessed. I currently held three elements in total: fire, water, and wind. Fire was my innate elemental aptitude. Water and wind, on the other hand, had been derived from water rope magic and the wind element I had twisted to create Silent Shadow. Unlike fire, raising their ranks was extraordinarily difficult. If I had to put it into words, it felt like teaching a child without legs how to run using only their arms. These were not powers obtained through normal channels, so they felt fundamentally alien, and their growth was just as stubborn.
Not that fire was easy. Still, within fire I had discovered the traits of Balance and Predation, and within water the trait of Change. My plan was to focus on fire. After all, my root and what I knew best was ultimately the fire element. From Balance I had taken the principles of rules and restrictions. From Predation I had taken the principle of digestion. I wanted to dig even deeper into them. Yes. In other words, I wanted to raise their rank.
I kindled a flame inside the lantern. The flame took shape. It became a rod spinning at ultra-high speed. Crackle— The element dispersed before it could finish forming. A failure.
Again. The flame took shape. A rod spinning at ultra-high speed was born inside the lantern, and the rod spun once. Then it scattered. A failure.
Again. The flame took shape and scattered. A failure.
Again. Again. Again. Again. Again. Again.
“Lady Ruina. Aren’t you eating? You’re not. Got it.”
Again. Again. Again. Again.
“Miss Ruina. I’ll tell you about the Holy Grail… later.”
Again. Again. Again. Again. Again.
“Master… Never mind.”
Again. Again. Again. Again. Again.
“You really have some nerve doing that in someone else’s workshop.”
Again. Again. Again. Again. The flame rose, then died. My mana had run dry.
I lay sprawled on the floor and focused my mind. It was the kind of exhaustion where even lifting a single finger felt impossible. Like wringing out a dry rag one more time. And yet, the question of how to use magic again in this state had a simple answer. I just had to concentrate.
I turned inward. On the outermost surface of my mind, all the relationships I had formed drifted about. Leon, Chris, Muran, Jerry, Flora, Haze, Tasia, Isaac, Orphin, Elera, Noa, the inn employee, the innkeeper, the guide at the imperial archives, the middle-aged man who gave me fine wine, Count Shade, and so on. Even people I had merely brushed past remained here. I went a little deeper. From here on, only those with somewhat deeper ties remained. Leon, the paladin I had saved right before his rear was breached. Chris, the succubus crazy about money. Muran, the tenacious alchemist. Jerry, the walking lighter. Flora, the mage who had longed for eternal life. Haze, the swordsman who had taken his eyes off the sword for magic. Tasia, the chess disaster. The unnamed high noble’s son who lost a bet of gold coins to me, also a chess disaster. Isaac, the rebellion failure. Orphin, the emperor failure. Elera, the prophecy mage. Noa, the magic vault. …And beyond them, people from my previous life with whom I had formed connections wandered as well.
Deeper still. The number of people decreased further. Their forms changed. I saw a young Leon sobbing as his parents were killed by the priests of the Evil God. I saw a young Chris on the verge of starving to death, buying bread with a fairy tale she had picked up from the ground. I saw a young Muran right before she was sold to a noble house, becoming the disciple of an alchemist instead. I saw a young Jerry begging in a back alley before catching the eye of the Archmage and becoming his disciple. I saw a young Flora hearing her own future and falling into despair. I saw a young Haze exchanging swords with his master. I saw a young Isaac staring blankly at the emperor’s throne. Some of these were stories I had heard directly; others were my own guesses about their pasts. But that wasn’t what mattered. What mattered was that an even deeper place remained.
Deeper. The number of people shrank more. Instead, another figure was added before each of them. Me. Leon awakening his holy power to help me. Chris beaming as she declared she would make me rich. Muran teaching me alchemy. Jerry lighting my pipe. Flora, on the brink of death, leaving me a wish. Haze looking at me with an expression that begged anyone, please, save me. Isaac staring at me with eyes full of despair. And then. My previous adoptive parents returning me to the orphanage while shouting that they hadn’t known I was that kind of child. The orphans my age who mocked me. The magician who showed me tricks. The schoolteacher who taught me that magic did not exist in this world. Even the black silhouette presumed to be my parents who abandoned me in a baby box.
Humans are social creatures. We grow by meeting others, and we have even restructured our brains for the sake of connecting with people. That is why humans who go too long without contact begin to break down. When social functions are unused, the brain atrophies. So many people had shaped who I was now. So many had influenced me. But that was not the important part. What mattered was that there was a place even deeper than this.
Deeper. Deeper still. The number of people dwindled. They vanished as quickly as moisture evaporating under a scorching sun. In the end, only two figures remained. I stood before one of them. She spoke.
“If you receive something, you must return it. That is what is fair.”
The orphanage director from my previous life had been an extraordinary person. She had shown with her own life what it truly meant to cherish others as if they were her own children. I knew better than anyone how difficult that was. Listening to the director’s whisper, I turned my head. A man stood there. He spoke.
“Please don’t ruin your pretty face. What is a woman doing with burns? Burns, of all things.”
“I have saved up a lot of money. If we donate it to the church, a high priest will heal you completely. You must get treatment first. Don’t wander off to strange places.”
“Do not offer your lifespan. Treasure your body. You must live long and healthy.”
“Ruina.”
“Be happy.”
Kelton had wished for my happiness. Without desiring any wealth or glory, he had wished solely for my happiness. I engraved the meaning of those words deep in my heart. I thought about them deeply. But this, too, was not what mattered. What mattered was that there was a place even deeper than this.
Deeper. Deeper still. Even Kelton and the orphanage director vanished. Now only one thing remained in the world. I lifted my head and looked at the final mass.
I like magic I like magic I like magic I like magic I like magic I like magic I like magic I like magic I like magic I like magic I like magic I like magic I like magic I like magic I like magic I like magic I like magic I like magic I like magic I like magic I like magic I like magic I like magic I like magic I like magic…
I did not know the origin of this obsession. The one thing I was certain of was that it had been with me since the moment I was born. I reached into the last remaining mass of intent.
Immediately afterward—
Whoosh.
A fierce flame roared up inside the lantern. Enduring a pain that felt as if my stomach would burst, I lay on the floor and laughed. My mana… had increased….
“So this actually works….”
Noa muttered quietly beside me. Then why do you keep making me do things that work instead of things that don’t?
“Noa. Do not try to imitate that Balance user. You’ll only drive yourself insane without gaining what you want.”
“Understood.”
This prophecy mage really had no filter.
“If you’re going to say something mean, give me a magic instead.”
“……”
“Hmm? Why choose silence instead of ‘I have nothing to give’? Don’t tell me you foresaw a future where you would give me magic soon?”
“Tsk.”
Elera clicked her tongue softly and disappeared. I staggered toward her like a zombie, crawling on the ground.
“Magic… Give me magic.”
“Whoa.”
Noa let out a sound of pure disgust and vanished. Neither my disciple nor his guardian had the proper attitude toward their teacher. Why was that?
“It’s probably because Lady Ruina keeps showing weird sides of herself.”
“Chris. If you keep that up I really will starve.”
“Starving is not allowed. I’ll warm up some stew, so wait a bit.”
As expected of Chris. She really did have the heart of a mother. In more ways than one.
While waiting for Chris’s stew, I fixed my gaze on the flame inside the lantern. What exactly was Balance? Balance had rules and restrictions, but what came after that? And Predation? What came after digestion? Various thoughts floated through my mind. They did not stop at Balance and Predation; they reached Change, the newly obtained wind element, all the various magics I had acquired, the magics I could still obtain, and even my own signature spells. My head felt like it would explode. The exact moment when all those chaotic thoughts fused into one—perhaps influenced by that messy sight—a cool breeze blew through my mind.
This was….
I blankly reached out toward empty air. Tiny particles of wind appeared around my hand. As if drawn by magnets, they slowly drifted toward one another. Transparent currents connected in sequence. Then they merged. No, it was different from merging. Like invisible threads tangling together, they clung stubbornly to one another and became connected.
It was a strange wind that somehow felt viscous rather than like simple air. I frowned. No. Not this. Give me fire. Fire.