Is This Really Sichuan Food? (2)
If someone mentions the Sichuan Tang Family, most people probably picture a vengeful, poison-wreathed psycho overflowing with grudges. At least, that's what I think. And since they handle poisons, you'd expect immunity to spicy food too—hot, stimulating dishes coming to mind.
But why, oh why, does the spread in front of me...
That sweet smell is piercing my nose, ugh.
...reek of sugar, just like Seol Mang happily pointed out? Fine, dongpo pork makes sense. But what the hell is this feast of cloying sweetness staring me down?
"Master, the sweet-and-sour pork rice bowl is delicious."
"......"
"Whoa, there's candied sweet potatoes wrapped in sticky rice?"
My disciples chatter away, and with every word, my blood pressure spikes in real time.
Sweet-and-sour pork rice bowl? And what the hell is 'sticky rice-wrapped candied sweet potatoes'?
"...Ji Yeon, what's dujjeon-go?"
"It's chewy sweet potatoes wrapped in sticky rice made from beans."
"......"
I'm seriously tempted to smack her. Not a single spicy dish in sight. Just an ocean of sugary crap. The only vaguely authentic Chinese stuff is tanghulu, dongpo pork, and hongshaorou. Everything else looks like imported desserts from abroad.
...This is basically no-meals meditation level.
I hated myself for getting used to the term "no-meals meditation," but staring at this lineup, the baseless phrase suddenly made a twisted kind of sense.
Dizzying.
"Doesn't suit your taste, benefactress?"
"...Ah, no, it's nothing. Delicious."
The real problem is how overly kind the Tang Family is to me. Like I saved their lives or something.
...I just came to check out the mess at Emei Sect and Point Cang Sect after hearing about it.
How did it turn into this?
'Can't spit on a smiling face,' huh...
Even back at Windy Horn Pavilion, the patriarch saw my red hair and eyes but said nothing. Sohyeok seemed a bit shocked, but...
...Why's he staring like that?
He just keeps gawking without a word. Soso scolds him nonstop for being rude, but...
Fine, I like sweets too.
Wondering what the hell I did to turn even the food into this disaster, I picked up my spoon. Truth be told, this suits my palate more. I'm not into the heavy spices of Chinese cuisine. Their "spicy" isn't just heat—it's this unique aroma that kinda turns me off.
Anyway, I was reasonably satisfied with the not-bad flavors.
Sweet potatoes are everywhere on this table.
Sweet potatoes came to the Ming Dynasty in its later years, right?
Doesn't feel like late Ming era, though.
Is this timeline screwed up too?
[Seol Mang.]
[What's wrong? We can't control appetites... As I've said a dozen times, little one, all we can do is set the martial world straight—]
[No, not that. Isn't the timeline a bit off too?]
Seol Mang pauses, as if at a loss for words. After a moment's thought, it speaks up.
[This one didn't notice, but you've sensed something?]
[I'll tell you later.]
[Ah, understood... You get kinda creepy when you're serious, little one.]
[Why?]
[Nothing.]
Seol Mang brushes it off as nothing. Tilting my head, I decide to fill my belly first and stuff my mouth with the sweets.
Tastes good, damn it.
The fact that it does taste good only pisses me off more. But as Seol Mang said, I can't cook and don't know shit anyway. So with magnanimous grace, I let it slide.
...I'm not great with Chinese food anyway.
No need to play the purist. I nodded to myself.
After the meal ended, I sent Ji Yeon and Hwa Ryeon back to their rooms first. Dang Cheonjin waited in the patriarch's quarters for the report. I toured the estate with Soso and Sohyeok as guides.
"Young Lady Dang, I heard you have a little sister too."
"Soyeong sleeps a lot, so she doesn't come out much."
I nodded, watching Soso answer comfortably now that we'd warmed up.
"Isn't the veiled hat stuffy?"
Soso asks about my deathcap hat. Honestly, yeah, it is. If I didn't need to hide my identity, I wouldn't wear it.
Blame Seol Mang for making my looks so weird.
It was crafting a body versatile for righteous, demonic, or anything in between that caused this mess. When I asked to tweak it more "righteous" since I'd stick to that path, Seol Mang threatened to kill me and summon someone else. Chilling memory.
To make Soso's question fun, I decide to ham it up a bit.
"Hehe... Too many troubles from being the world's most beautiful, you see."
"I see."
"...?"
No tsukkomi? I blink blankly, and Soso tilts her head in confusion.
"Wh-why are you staring like that...?"
"...You didn't play along."
"That was a joke...?"
"...Yes."
I hated myself for pondering what she meant by "was it a joke?"
What's wrong with a little joking?
Sighing, I clear my throat and eye Soso.
"Martial artists keep charging at me calling me a blood ghost or whatever from the get-go, so I have to hide my face."
"Eek."
"Sis...?"
Sohyeok glares at his sister with murderous eyes.
Why's this kid sticking to me since earlier?
Truth be told, Cheonjin assigned only Soso as my guide. So why's the young lord tagging along? I glance at him, and his face flushes red.
Cold or something?
Even a poison-filled Tang Family gets colds, huh? I flash a bright smile and wish him well.
"Get better soon."
"Th-thank you."
"......"
Sohyeok thanks me profusely while Soso stares like she's chewing shit.
This place has more sibling vibes than the Zhuge family.
The Zhuges bickered too, but they were creepily close. Here, the distance feels just right—satisfying.
"You two looking out for each other is heartwarming."
"You're too kind."
Soso beams. Minus her initial blood-ghost freakout, she's a fine girl. Polite, and ever since calling me benefactress, she's been nothing but accommodating.
Wanna kidnap her.
The more beauties, the better. Lure her with promises of good teachings, and she'd probably follow. How to seduce her properly...
[I know what you're thinking. Drop it. The Tang Family needs direct lineage now more than ever.]
[Hng...]
Seol Mang reads my face and advises against it. Fair point—their elder turned blood ghost.
...Luckily no full conversions thanks to blood poison, but a storm's coming.
The martial alliance will pressure them hard. Poor bastards. I shook my head.
[Seol Mang, do we really need to help more?]
[The Taiji Formation's already set. That'll check the blood cult plenty. No need for more from you, little one.]
Makes sense. I've done my part. The blood ghosts' power will dissipate into that formation.
Still horrifying on reflection.
Sacrificing clueless civilians as offerings to summon the blood demon again. That's why cult fanatics are terrifying.
"Time for you to head back, I think."
"Ah......"
Soso prompts gently, Sohyeok looking a tad reluctant. I smile and pat his head.
"Wanna spar tomorrow?"
"...!!"
Obvious why a young genius would envy a master. He craves guidance. Despite knowing the skill gap at his age, losing to Hwa Ryeon—who beat his sister—must sting. To him, Hwa Ryeon's a symbol of being surpassed, an obstacle to overcome. So he yearns to learn from me, her master.
I'm the Tang Family's benefactress and his idol: his respected sister's savior and her rival's teacher. Plenty to tempt a young man.
"C-can I...?"
"Of course. I'll be waiting."
"......"
Sohyeok bows his head. I chuckle and remind him kids need sleep to grow tall. Training matters, but rest more so.
Dang Cheonjin gulped before the martial alliance's peak expert seated across from him. Terrifying, honestly. The alliance's prestige pierced the heavens. And this was the Sword Sovereign's trusted ally.
...Tames spirit beasts too. What a monster.
Wondering where such a master hid, Cheonjin hesitated to speak—until then.
"I wonder how Emei's faring..."
Hayeon's red eyes gleamed as she smiled brightly. That crimson crescent moon gaze sent chills down Soso and Cheonjin's spines.