The Art of the Parry
There is an ancient tradition among the hardcore veterans of the Souls-like genre. Among them, there is one immortal custom that makes anyone look at them and think, "Ah, this person is truly a veteran..." It is none other than the "Panty-mon." Literally, the legendary attire where one discards all upper and lower garments, covering only the most essential parts. A loose scrap of cloth around the waist, a thin piece of fabric thinner than plastic wrap dangling over the chest. The defense stat is, naturally, zero. In the late game, one or two hits from a boss will tear your body to shreds—it is truly the realm of "you only get one chance."
Yet, there were those who fought wearing such clothes. No, they wore them because of that. The thrill of staking your life on that one desperate moment. The pleasure felt when facing a boss on a battlefield where a single graze means the end. It was an addiction. The dopamine that explodes in that dizzying moment where death and pleasure intersect. Only then did one truly enter the realm of the veteran. ...However, there was a next stage even for the Panty-mon. It was the "Fist." No one knows who started it first. But I know. I know why he started doing that. Because I, too, had the same thought the moment I reached that stage. 'Ah... can't I just run around completely naked?' Underwear? It was already at the level of wearing nothing. But even though this was 19+, it wasn't a dedicated eroge. Full nudity was prohibited. Besides, I had already mastered the patterns of the monsters in the game. There was no chance of making a mistake anymore. To be precise, I killed them all before I could make a mistake. So I was worried. 'Isn't there something more stimulating?' It was then, while walking through the ruins of an apocalypse teeming with the undead, wearing nothing but a pair of panties below my thighs.
"Hm?" My character. The +99 Reinforced Wooden Club held in one hand by 'IWantToLickThatPlace'. The moment I saw that, it was like the monk Wonhyo drinking from the skull cup—I had an epiphany. Ah, the time had come for me to enter the stage of black, murky crude oil, having become so seasoned that I had rotted away.
Serika’s eyes went wide, as if she couldn't believe the sight before her. Thwack! Thwack-thwack-thwack! Whoosh! Bam!!
"???"
That was clearly Revi. But her fighting style was so strange. "After dodging, a light hook. Jump, then enter from the left flank, and another straight to the abdomen! ...Excellent. Next is breaking the upper teeth. Revi!"
"Yes! Chanwoo-nim."
On cue, Revi leaped up and drove her fist down. A weapon? There was no such thing. A blade? It had been absorbed by the Human Hunter earlier. Yet, she was beating a Queen-class monster to a pulp with her bare hands. And beside her... "Float like a butterfly, sting like a bee!" Chanwoo-nim was there, holding a black device in his hands, his fingers moving busily. In the center was a joystick protruding like an areola, and on the left and right were buttons perfectly spaced for his fingers. The hand movements dancing over the mysterious device were... truly bizarre.
"...Is Chanwoo-nim controlling Revi with that right now?"
Serika rolled her eyes, then carefully opened her mouth. A single word slipped out like a breath. "No way..."
It really didn't make sense. A device that could control an android? No, she had never even heard of such a concept. Androids, the 'autonomous units' created with humans as a motif, beings with free will. That they could move perfectly according to someone’s fingertips—this was truly... something out of a myth. But right now, Chanwoo-nim’s fingers were moving rapidly over the device. In sync with those hands, Revi flew across the battlefield as if gliding. Perfect command execution without a single error in timing, distance, or movement. And even the finishing blow, clean and precise.
"Wow...!" Serika covered her mouth with both hands. Her pupils sparkled like starlight, and if she had a tail, it would surely have been trembling. "This... this is a human! It’s just... too amazing!"
The ecstatic exclamation flowed out like a whisper. Honestly, until now, she had only thought of him as a "cool man" whose only merit was his "big dick," but to think he was full of such merits as well. "By the way, that Revi... she looks strangely used to being controlled. Don't tell me, is this not her first time?"
She felt a strange sense of jealousy. She found herself wanting to be controlled by those fingertips at least once. But that wasn't what we needed to focus on right now. "Chanwoo-nim... is there any point in hitting it like that?"
Serika looked forward again with a puzzled expression. Revi continued to strike the opponent with her bare fists. But no matter how she looked at it, those attacks couldn't even leave a scratch. The monster’s skin showed no damage, no elasticity, no reaction. It was like trying to dig through a mountain with bare hands. Being an android herself, she knew. That would never work. No matter how much you hit it, it was useless. You couldn't win. Just a moment ago, she had felt a strange jealousy watching Revi being controlled, but now, she couldn't understand it at all.
Then, Chanwoo raised the corner of his mouth and said, "There isn't. Right now, it's just playing house."
"Yes? Then why keep up such useless attacks...?"
"Why? To build up the Posture. The damage comes after."
"Posture?"
That word didn't exist in her vocabulary. Suddenly, the puzzle in her head clicked into place in a strange way. The punching wasn't an attack, but a process of 'building up' something. And the point where it would finally collapse. ...Something was about to happen.
"Here... it is! Here it is! Here it is! Here it iiiiiis!!"
As soon as Chanwoo finished speaking, the monster’s wings bulged and distorted, and something grew from within. Countless nano-tentacles gathered together, growing long like a spear made of metal. The black, glistening tip of the spear was as sharp as a snake’s fang, and it was lifted 'swish' from under the giant wing. And the next moment.
Boom! With explosive pressure, the tentacle spear was fired from the wing. It was a literal unavoidable strike, flying in a straight line. "You can't dodge it! Revi is...!"
Serika’s eyes widened. The attack was flying in without a moment to block, and Revi was standing in front without a weapon. However.
"If you can't dodge it, just catch it."
Chanwoo’s voice flowed out low and calm. And he muttered quietly, like a secret incantation. "Deflect."
Click. At that moment, the button on the joypad was pressed. A strange intuition struck. A moment where everything seemed to slow down. The moment that terrifying spear flew right in front of Revi’s eyes. Her one foot shot out at a very precise angle.
Swish! She stomped on the tip of the spear. Precisely in the center of its trajectory. Then, the recoil exploded, Revi’s body rotated once in the air, absorbed the impact with her body, and landed perfectly. And at the same time.
Posture Gauge Exceeded. Stagger State Entered.
"Now. Revi!"
"Light Uppercut!"
Toward the chest where the monster’s core was, the fist of a combat android with a combat power of 1 flew once again. Thwack. A single bare-fisted blow landed on the monster’s abdomen.
"Gah?!"
The Human Hunter, which had been flapping its wings and rampaging, flinched and was pushed back.
"Amazing... to perform such a counter-attack at exactly that timing."
"It’s one of the most basic counter-attack methods in Souls-like games."
"Souls, like...? Anyway, you’re amazing! Chanwoo-nim."
The joint deflection between me and Revi. The Human Hunter, having been subjected to what is called "You, you suck," took an unexpected critical hit and limped backward. Meanwhile.
"Chanwoo-nim! But is there nothing for me to do?!"
Serika, you have nothing to do. Just go get some popcorn in the corner! ...Not that. It was a sudden shout. Serika was looking at Chanwoo with sparkling eyes. The voice was desperate. Because this moment was too intense to just stand by on the sidelines. Chanwoo, who was operating the joypad, had his fingers stop for a moment at those words.
"Something for Serika to do...?"
Revi was busy beating the Queen-class monster with her bare fists. It was I who held the joypad and commanded those movements. The two of us were enough. Besides, Serika was a long-range supporter; even if she joined now, she wouldn't reach the final blow. Above all, if she joined this battle, the game would become too 'boring.' Nevertheless.
"I was also made for battle... just watching is too..."
Serika dropped her head, looking dejected. Seeing her hanging limp, lips pressed together, like a cat waiting to be petted, Chanwoo slowly turned his eyes away.
"Am I really... useless?"
There was a strange sincerity in those eyes. A pure outcry of 'let me join in too.' Chanwoo swallowed a sigh. The real problem was that there was 'only one' thing Serika could contribute in this situation. And that, too, was in a very... troublesome direction.
"Hmm... there is one thing."
"There is?! I, I’m fine with anything! For Chanwoo-nim!"
Serika, who had approached in one step, shouted with sparkling eyes, and Chanwoo quietly lifted the hand holding the joypad.
"...I’m controlling this right now, and the dopamine responsible for pleasure in my brain is reaching its limit."
"Yes?"
"So, my brain is overheating from the concentration required for control... and my senses are being drawn to one side."
"One side?"
"Yeah. To be precise, inside my pants. My sexual desire has grown too large."
Serika’s eyes went round in an instant. "If I leave it like this, my body might explode."
"Oh my god!"
To be precise, it just meant that my sexual desire would explode in a 'wet dream' tonight. But I didn't bother saying that. It would ruin the mood for no reason.
"If it’s such an emergency... I must help you!"
As soon as those words finished, Serika knelt down. As if she had found her purpose, like a prostitute finding her work, in the joy of being able to 'be of help.'
"I did it last time too! Please leave it to me again."
Her lips were pressed tight, her eyes were serious, but her actions were so erotic. The moment her hand touched the button of my pants, her smooth movements made it seem as if her job had changed from a combat android to a sex-android.
"This time, for more efficient processing, I will use my hands."
With that, Serika, who had taken my erect cock into her hand, was ready to perform one of humanity’s most popular methods of masturbation. She was ready to give me a 'handjob.'