Huh, Where's the Cat?
Huh, where's the cat? Betrayal hits me like a truck, and I'm shivering all over. My whole body trembles uncontrollably. A messy swirl of emotions—relief? Disappointment? Rage? Pity?—spreads through me like spilled paint.
"Cat..." I mutter again. Cat. Cat. Cat. Cat... Over and over, without getting sick of it.
Serina, who invited me to her house, is sneaking peeks at me, gauging my mood. A pure, innocent yuri beauty like her shouldn't be wasting her time on a creep like me, but I'm too busy shaking with betrayal to care.
I speak, my voice wobbling just like my body. "...Hey, Serina?"
"Y-yeah...?"
"I wasn't, like, expecting a cat or anything."
"Okay..."
"I don't even like them that much. For real."
It's the truth. Who gives a shit about cats? My brain's been 99% yuri fantasies my whole life—there's no room left for some dumb animal. Sure, they're kinda cute, but that's it. No way am I adopting one as a pet.
For me, the only meaning behind "cat" is the slang for the girl on the bottom in a yuri scene. Though it's just because it sounds like neko, no actual relation to cats... And lately, nobody even uses it anymore. It's basically a dead meme. Only hardcore yuri purists remember it.
I'm lost in this stream-of-consciousness haze when something nudges my leg at my feet—a cat. Black. I never brought a black cat to this house. The white one from the tree earlier is still curled on my chest... Wait, oh. It just hopped down. Now there are two cats.
Meaning this little black shadow was always here in Serina's house, nothing to do with me.
I mutter, practically sobbing. "Why the hell is there a real cat here...?"
Serina looks utterly baffled by my meltdown.
"Didn't you say... come see the cat?"
"Yeah! That's the problem!"
"...Sorry...?"
Guwaaaah. Not like she needs to apologize or anything. Yeah. That's the issue. Serina's house... actually has a real cat.
...This isn't it. This isn't how it's supposed to go.
If someone says, "Hey, I have a cat at home—if you like cats, wanna come see?" it's just an excuse to lure you over. Then when you go, "Huh, where's the cat?" they meow right in your ear, pretending they're the cat, and boom—pussy rubbing. That's the classic move, right...?
Of course, of course. I'm not saying I was expecting that. I mentioned the classic, but TS girls are obviously exempt. I swear to the heavens, no dark designs on Serina whatsoever. Just holding hands and rolling around fills me with so much guilt my eyes spin like crazy.
I just wanted to check how yuri-compatible Serina is. Sure, it stings that the test subject had to be me, but that's why I came here—to measure her yuri potential.
And if the result is this? All that agonizing on the way over—should I bail? Should I turn back now? Would that hurt the yuri beauty's feelings?—what was all that for?
That's why I'm fuming even as I feel relieved. It's a huge relief she's not using the cat ploy on me, since I'm a walking yuri bomb. But seeing a real cat means she never even planned to meow-seduce anyone. That pisses me off.
"Lily?"
This girl is too innocent. No way she can read people's true nature, but I can say it with confidence. She's so pure and bright that deviance feels like another world. She can't even fathom blooming love with another girl, so if things keep going like this, she'll waste her pussy-rubbing talent on some guy—dating, marriage, the whole nightmare.
And I can't tolerate a pretty girl like her getting tangled with a man. If that actually happened, I'd puke blood and drop dead on the spot.
So, time to train her. ...Wait, wrong word. Reform her. I've decided to drag Serina onto the path of yuri myself. Call me filthy if you want. But if these dirty hands can guide a heavenly yuri girl to the right way, the Yuri Goddess will forgive me. Ends justify the means, right?
So, from now on, I'll teach her about sex.
"Serina."
"Yeah?"
"Having a real cat is bad. In situations like this...!"
"Like what?"
"You know, when you wanna seduce a girl you like?"
"Like Lily?"
Why am I popping up here?
"No, I'm the exception."
"How do you seduce someone like Lily...?"
"Guaaaaaah...!"
The path to reform is so damn thorny. We're screwed from the starting line. What do you even want me for? And like I'd fall for it anyway.
"No. Anyway. No cat. I'm the cat. Meow. Like that...!"
"Sorry, I don't get it."
"......"
I despair at my cursed vocabulary. Trying to explain yuri slang to a girl who doesn't even know what "bringing home" implies? I'm too dumb for this.
But I can't give up.
"Okay, I'm at your house to see the cat, right?"
"Yeah."
"I'll go back outside and come in again saying, 'Huh, where's the cat?' Then you meow... right in my ear, my ear, ungh, my ear...!"
"Meow?"
"Hic! Not that close, like right now...!"
"Meow. Meooow."
Too cute. And her breath is so close. This is stupidly hot. What insane talent is this? Maybe I'm too corrupted as a TS girl to handle a yuri genius's pussy-rub move.
"H-huuuh...!"
"I don't get it."
"Wh-what?"
"Like, why do you have to do this?"
She's not buying it at the root level. Totally normal reaction, so I can't argue.
As I fumble for words, Serina smiles apologetically. "I just don't get why you have to pretend to be a cat. Eheh."
"It's... obvious."
"Oh, it is?"
"Y-yeah?"
"Unh..."
I could just call her an idiot and be done, but Serina's trying so hard to understand. Sweet doesn't even begin to cover it.
"If Lily demonstrates, maybe I'll get it...?"
"Eh?"
"You're bringing someone home to seduce them, right? If I know how it feels to be seduced, I might understand."
"Oooong?"
She's got a point. Yeah, it's about the receiving end hearing the meow.
I nod, and Serina steps back, clears her throat with a dainty ahem, then says, "Huh, Lily. Where's the cat?"
......But this is embarrassingly awkward.
"M-meow..."
"Lily, that's not it. You have to get closer, whisper it in the ear, right?"
"Eh. Y-yeah."
"Wanna try again?"
"Unh..."
Why am I the one getting schooled? The thought flashes, but saying it would kill this golden training chance. So I obediently approach Serina.
I crouch like a real cat, paws out front. Sneaking closer, peeking up—her height difference from the bent knees makes me tilt my head. Slim jawline, brown hair framing a cute ear. Is that soft skin along the cartilage flushing red, or am I imagining it?
Face upturned, I bring my lips close... and nyaaang.
"......"
"Serina?"
"Ah. Oh, so that's the feeling."
"Get it now? Heh heh."
"Lily... that's kinda lewd..."
Huh? Did I just hear something ridiculous?
"What comes next?"
"Wh-what did you just...?"
"What do you do now?"
"Uh, huh?"
"This can't be the end."
Uh, yeah? I dunno either. Head to the bed? Slam pussies together, and since you seduced me first, I'll do whatever—smug cat attitude making her moan... No, no, no, that's not it. I never planned to go that far. Teaching her this much was just so she could use it on other girls.
"Do you treat them like a cat?"
"Hiyaaak?!"
Don't tickle under my chin! I'm not a purring cat!
"Lily, stay still, okay?"
"Th-this isn't... hey, Serinaaa."
"Shh. No kicking around?"
"......"
Wh-what's happening? The sudden shift is so out-of-left-field I freeze, and Serina starts stroking my back.
"Kyaa...!"
"Be good at my house, Lily."
"Y-yes...!"
"Good girl."
Don't pet my head...!
"Mom and Dad aren't home today, so let's play as much as we want, just us...?"
"......Y-yes?"