Precious Tails and Coveted Dolls
The tail I'd gotten at the doll shop wasn't originally part of my body, and it wasn't something I really needed anyway. So I'd just casually asked if it could be removed. But why was Summer making that face? Without realizing it, I rolled my eyes, gauging her reaction.
"Doesn't my tail bother you?"
"Huh? No? Not even a little with you, Winter. If anything, I like it."
"Really...?"
Summer didn't seem like she was lying. If she liked it, then there was no reason for me to get rid of it.
"Yeah. Winter's tail is mine now, so you absolutely can't cut it off or anything, got it?"
"O-okay..."
When had my tail become Summer's? Was she just joking around? It had been so long since anyone had teased me like that—I had no idea how to react. I just stared up at her blankly, and she bent down to my eye level.
"Winter, you can't just damage your body like that."
"Uh..."
Did that count as damaging my body? The tail hadn't been part of me originally, so I figured removing it would be fine. But Summer had clearly misunderstood. I wasn't the type to mistreat my body the way she seemed to think.
"Not just the tail—any part of your body. Your hands, your ears..."
"R-right..."
"Yeah. I guess you still don't get it, huh, Winter?"
"N-no, I do. I know."
I knew full well how precious the body was—no explanation needed. Even kindergarteners knew that. But for some reason, Summer was shaking her head as she looked at me.
"No, you don't get it yet."
"I do know..."
"If you did, you wouldn't work yourself to collapse."
Summer tugged at my cheeks with a slightly dissatisfied expression. It didn't hurt, but they stretched out long and thin.
What the...?
Was it because I'd shown I didn't pay enough attention to my condition? But collapsing from exhaustion and cutting off a body part were totally different things. Something felt off, but I had no intention of arguing with her. I knew she was just worried about me.
"...Yeah. Guess I don't know after all."
"Right. You'll figure it out little by little, so don't worry too much. Okay?"
"Okay..."
Flustered, I scratched the back of my neck and turned my gaze to the buffet food. For now, I'd focus on enjoying the meal properly. It might be a place I'd never get to come back to.
* * *
After finishing at the buffet, we wandered aimlessly through the department store. It was thanks to Summer's suggestion to check it out.
"So yummy. Levi Nas is now the person who ate the most food in the world today."
Levi Nas rubbed her bloated belly. Despite her cute claim, she hadn't eaten that much. Probably because her body was so small. Just like mine.
"Winter mostly stuck to the fish dishes, huh."
"Yeah. I like fish dishes."
Fish steak. It was the best. If I were a kid with little life experience, it might've even brought tears to my eyes.
"Hehe, that's why Winter likes Sophia so much."
"...Because she's a fish beastkin?"
"Yeah. Winter's not gonna eat Sophia later, right?"
Summer giggled like a little kid. I frantically waved my hands in denial.
"N-no, I won't eat her..."
"Haha, just kidding, kidding."
"Ah."
Of course it was a joke. Teasing with people still felt awkward. My next goal should be to joke around with someone without hesitation. It was essential for living like a normal person.
Levi Nas might be good to start with.
She was the youngest and purest, so she'd react nicely even to a little prank. I glanced sideways at Levi Nas beside me.
"Whoa..."
Levi Nas's eyes sparkled as she stared somewhere. It was a toy store painted in bright, vibrant colors. She just watched the toys longingly, without begging us like other kids might. She must've figured we had no money and wouldn't buy anything no matter what. Her heartbreaking resignation tugged at my heart. Things were really tight, but for Levi Nas's sake, I should buy her at least one or two toys.
"Levi Nas, want a toy?"
"Yeah... Levi Nas has wanted a horn rabbit doll since forever..."
Levi Nas fidgeted with her fingers, sneaking peeks at me. I could see her longing but inability to ask outright.
"Then let's go. I'll buy you a horn rabbit doll."
"R-really? You'll buy Levi Nas a doll?"
"Yeah. You don't have a single doll yet."
Thrilled by my words, Levi Nas clapped her hands and hopped in place.
"The king really is amazing! All the other grown-ups said they wouldn't buy Levi Nas one!"
Summer furrowed her brow at Levi Nas's words. I knew her anger wasn't at Levi Nas, but at those 'grown-ups.'
"...Bad grown-ups."
"That's how grown-ups are, usually."
Did my words sound weird? Summer and Sophia flinched.
"N-not all grown-ups are bad..."
"Yeah. There are a few good ones sometimes."
There had to be a tiny handful—noble souls born with innate kindness. But from my experience, bad people were far more common. Of course, I knew most of them tried to live good lives. I was doing the same, after all. Humans are born wicked but strive to be good. That was my philosophy.
"Winter still..."
"Still?"
"N-nothing."
Summer gave an awkward smile. She seemed like she wanted to say something but held back. I stared up at her blankly, then chased after Levi Nas, who was dashing into the toy store. I just hoped the horn rabbit doll wasn't too expensive.
* * *
Grown-ups are mostly bad. That was how the world looked in Winter's eyes. Summer knew she was included among those bad grown-ups. She wanted to make excuses to Winter, but she couldn't. She knew too well that Winter had lived without even a shred of hope.
It'd be so sad if the world seemed nothing but evil to her. There were so many good people out there. Summer gazed endlessly at Winter's back as she entered the toy store.
"Sophia. I want to show Winter that there are tons of good grown-ups in this world."
"...Yes, let's do that."
"Okay..."
Summer entered the toy store with Sophia. There, Levi Nas and Winter were staring at the dolls, their pupils shaking.
"Whoa, King, the dolls are so expensive..."
"U-uh..."
The dolls in the store started at a minimum of 100,000 won. It was a high-end department store, so prices were steep. For Winter, who'd imagined maybe 10,000 won at most, it was a real shock. Horn rabbits were only 10,000 won each—how could a horn rabbit doll cost 200,000?
As Winter gawked at the price tags in horror, Levi Nas hugged one horn rabbit doll tight to her chest. She held it for about ten seconds, then reluctantly put it back. Regret and disappointment filled her face.
"Levi Nas played enough. Doesn't need a doll now."
"Th-that's..."
At times like this, she should boldly say it was fine and ask to buy it. But the horn rabbit doll was so pricey, Winter couldn't open her mouth. Miserable, she stared at the floor. She felt so pathetic, tears nearly welled up.
"Sorry. I wanted to buy you the doll, but it's too expensive..."
"It's okay. We'll come look again later."
"U-uh..."
As Winter and Levi Nas slumped in gloom, the eyes of the other shoppers in the store turned to Summer. You're rich—buy it already. That's what it felt like they were saying to her.
"Um, kids?"
"Yeah?"
"I can buy you a doll or whatever..."
"R-really?!"
Levi Nas's eyes went wide. Only then did the other shoppers in the store relax with relieved expressions. Every adult wanted the kids to be happy.
"Yeah. Winter, want to pick something out too?"
"I'm good."
What would I even do with a doll? Winter firmly declined. But Summer interpreted the refusal differently.
"Ah, um..."
It probably wasn't that she truly hated dolls. Winter was still at an age to play with them. Summer remembered how Winter had looked disappointed earlier over the price. It wasn't just resignation—she must've wanted one deep down. It was natural for a child to crave dolls. How could she get Winter to accept one? Not knowing, Summer decided to buy first and give it later.
I'll...
...get that white cat doll that looks just like Winter. Summer picked up a doll as big as her head.
"A cat doll, huh?"
"Yeah. I like dolls too."
"Ah."
Grown-ups could like dolls too. Nothing weird about it. Winter nodded, looking up at the cat doll.
The ears and tail look just like mine.
It gave her a strange sense of kinship. Unconsciously, Winter wagged her tail. The instinct of a young beastkin toward one of her own kind.
"Oh..."
Seeing Winter wag her tail, Summer thought, See? She does like dolls.