The Perverted Gods' Livestream Chaos

..... Not evil gods, right?

"What the hell."

The sudden appearance of those floating messages left me dumbfounded for a moment. No, it wasn't just the out-of-nowhere system windows that shocked me—the content was straight-up ridiculous.

"... What the hell is going on here."

My brain couldn't process the situation at all. Those usernames up front were weird as fuck, and the contents—suddenly cheering, then others calming them down, spectating, sighing. What the actual fuck was happening.

"What!?"

This time, an old geezer's voice echoed in my head like telepathy. Wait, was he old...? Thinking back, it felt more like a middle-aged guy forcing a grave tone. Like he was trying to sound dignified but sucking at the acting, coming off as just elderly.

"Chat...?"

This time, a nasal goddess voice followed by a somewhat youthful one rang out.

The more I heard, the harder it was to feel good about this.

"So you're bored and decided to use me as your plaything?"

Was all that mythology stuff true? That could be a huge problem.

Even after hearing the goddess, I couldn't shake my suspicions. Who the hell would believe that? Accepting this chaos with a "Sure, got it" would make me the crazy one.

"... Anyway, what exactly are you guys doing?"

"Recovering?"

Didn't they die? Weren't they killed by godslayers and booted from the heavens? I figured myths had some lies, but even the god-killing part being fake was beyond imagination.

"Records?"

Fiddling with the system like the others, two windows popped up in front of me.

".... No records or anything?"

Not being used to this new system made my fiddling clumsy as hell. I had no clue how it worked, and the gods' chatter was beyond a mere mortal like me. I needed time to sort this shit out.

"... Alright, alright."

The moment I opened my eyes, a voice made me sigh.

"Not a dream, huh...."

Normally Rain would gently wake me, but since I got up earlier than expected, hearing that forced-deep uncle voice first thing soured my mood.

I'd just wanted to get reasonably strong and live peacefully.

"How the hell did this happen."

Why was I reading the gods fighting like it was live text commentary....

Sighing, I got up, washed my face, did a quick shave, and came out to find Rain prepping breakfast while Lianne mopped the floor.

"Classes right away today?"

As I sat at the table, Rain brought out a light salad and a dish with cheese and corn from the dorm kitchen she wasn't used to yet. Another new recipe.

"It's called corn cheese. Lianne bought cheese at the market, so I tried making it. Give it a taste."

"Sure?"

Peeling off the hot melted cheese and popping it in my mouth, a subtle sweetness mixed with the nutty cheese flavor in an unexpectedly good combo.

"Success? Or fail?"

"Success today. A bit rich, but good enough to savor slowly with the salad."

"Really?!"

Her reaction felt like newlyweds chatting. Smiling, I scooped a big bite of Rain's corn cheese and shoved it in.

Come to think of it, where do these gods' coins even go. Last night before bed, I'd seen the coin system pop up.

"Cough! Kek!!"

"Young master!?"

Divine powers!?

Who cares if a god laughs. Divine powers vary by domain, but most are near-omniscient or omnipotent. Like Zeus, god of thunder, controlling all lightning and thunder at will. Hera, goddess of marriage, not as raw powerful but fosters harmony in homes. Without her, families wouldn't bond with love—just raise kids like animals, abandoned to grow wild.

Godly powers are straight-up broken.

"W-water..!!"

"Lianne!! Water, quick!!!"

"Y-yes!!"

Gulping down the water Lianne handed me, I steadied my breathing and cautiously tapped the [List] button.

"...."

I nearly blacked out.

Astrafe, Aegis, golden and lead arrows, scythe of the reaper—godly powers and artifacts straight out of myths filled the list, making my ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠eyes spin.

"Young master?"

"What's wrong?"

At Rain and Lianne's words, I pulled myself together and forced a smile. Like I was fine. (I sure as hell wasn't.)

Yeah, with them sponsoring like crazy, I could buy a few powers....

"...."

My overheated brain cooled ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠instantly. What? A billion coins? I had maybe 24 total. To borrow Zeus's power, I'd need to grind a billion coins.... Yeah, no way in hell.

The others were all in the hundreds of millions too. I calmed the fuck down, stone cold.

Of course. These were divine powers. It'd be weirder if they were cheap.

Swallowing, I flipped pages, scanning for cheap skills and items. Finally, stuff I could maybe afford.

Honestly, even these were pricey compared to my coins, but the state of stuff I could buy was...

Shit like that. Only.

Whatever, ignore the gods fighting again. This coin shop had endless potential. If the only way to earn points was god sponsors, growth would suck—but still, I could buy stuff. Direct powers like Astrafe were impossible, but one-use powers and items? Probably doable.

"Missions?"

Oh yeah, there was another system above the coin one. The coin shock made me forget, but time to check this mission thing.

Godly quests, basically. Solid rewards, no penalty for me on fail. Worth doing.

Oh, perfect timing. Let's see what they—

Yeah. Pass.