Zone 1 (3) - Shattered Resolve

We won. I had no idea when or how I killed it, but when I came to my senses, the monster was reduced to chunks of meat, and the play logs were scrolling up one after another.

I lit the lantern, which hissed faintly, and the thick darkness scattered.

Seeing the monster's corpse with my eyes open and the massive mentality drain, I figured it was due to that monster's skill... but I never wanted to go through that again. In the game, the Horror Prophet raising its wooden staff and spouting nonsense just showed an illustration of characters clutching their heads in agony and shedding tears. But whether it was a dream or reality was unclear, and even my memories of it were hazy. What was certain was that both my mental and physical states were utter shit.

"Don't hit me, it hurts, I'm sorry, I won't do it again, please, I'll ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠do anything, forgive me just once, aaah, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, a worthless trash mongrel like me..."

I turned around. Kaya, curled up like a fetus on the floor clutching her head, was completely broken. Her numerical value was still at -85, and in the game, even dropping to -99 had no ill effects. But this wasn't the game.

'They throw the game player into the game world, let them use the game system, but why don't they handle shit like this like in the game?!'

As I'd feared, her mentality didn't plummet straight to -100, but looking at Kaya now, it was as good as done. Wait a second. If she acts like this at -85, what happens when it hits -100 and her mind breaks?

A chill ran through my body for an entirely different reason. And I felt it acutely. This was the infamous dungeon of The Long Terror. And at a difficulty level worlds apart from hard mode.

I could say with certainty that even if I'd done all sorts of degenerate play for achievements or my weird fetish runs before, I'd never faced a situation as horrific and hopeless as this. This was a blatant roguelike restart moment.

'Like hell.'

I gritted my teeth. This goddamn dungeon gave no time to recover body or mind. I had to endure and keep moving somehow. Lingering anywhere but a rest area was suicide in the broadest sense.

"Kaya."

"Eeeeek!"

Kaya, still curled up and desperately apologizing to some invisible someone, freaked out and scrambled back when I called her. The scraping of her ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠armor on the floor was grating.

"Kaya."

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry!"

"Kaya!"

"Aaaah!"

When I grabbed her shoulder, she screamed and started thrashing. It had only happened twice, but the brave battle nun who'd swung her mace so fiercely in combat was gone, replaced only by a frail half-elf woman swallowed by terror and trauma.

There was no time, and the place wasn't right. I couldn't soothe her gently.

Slap—

"Kyaaah!"

"Snap out of it, Kaya!"

"Ugh, hngh..."

Slapped across the cheek, Kaya curled up and began to sob. When I tried to force her to her feet, she was heavier than expected.

"Kaya!"

"Hngh, ugh, p-please..."

"Didn't you say you'd protect me!?"

Kaya's crying stopped dead. Her swollen, distorted eyes—previously glassy like a dead fish's—began to focus.

Lucky. I had to push now.

"L-Leader?"

"Yeah, Kaya. We won. We won."

"Ah, ahh."

"You and me. We fucked up that disgusting bastard!"

"Ah, aaaah!"

"Don't look away! Face reality!"

I grabbed her face with both hands as she seemed to regain her senses only to start convulsing again at the sight of the monster's corpse.

"This is only the second room. Did you come to Seilroom and join the hero squad just to collapse here? Did the dungeon look easy? Did you think you'd get pampered for fighting half-assed and healing half-assed!?"

"Hic, hngh."

"In a dungeon where death can come anytime, weakness is a sin! And a weak mind is an even greater sin! What confidence made you say you could stand at the front and protect me? With such a pathetic mentality!"

Kaya's eyes shook mercilessly. Tears streamed from her eyes, snot from her nose, and her cheek was red and swollen from my slap. Truth be told, Kaya hadn't done anything wrong, but the outcome was shit. The dungeon's difficulty was insanely high. An elite popping up in the second room was borderline bug-level bullshit.

But there was no one to complain to, and it had already happened. So Kaya became the one at fault. In a game, that is. On easy mode, this wouldn't have happened at all. On hard mode, I'd sigh, retreat, or push to the next room and let her die if she did. But she wasn't some passing NPC A, and I was right there as her leader.

Like it or not, I had to drag her to the end—at least to 1-10.

"Kaya. Who are you?"

"...A humble servant of the goddess of mercy and tolerance, Raella, Kaya Epentzel."

"Kaya. Who are you?"

"...A battle nun trained to scourge all evil and corruption in this land, Kaya."

"Kaya. Who are you?"

Kaya met my eyes directly. Her trembling had stopped, and her tears and snot had dried. She closed her eyes once, opened them, and answered without hesitation.

"Battle nun of the hero squad HAT, led by Leader Hendrick, Kaya."

"Good. Never forget it. No matter what."

'Phew. Somehow it worked.'

I wiped a tear from her cheek with my thumb, then quickly searched the room before mentality could drain more. No hidden treasure.

Then, thinking back on what I'd done to her made it awkward as hell. In the heat of the moment, I'd lost myself in anger, but recalling her expressionless face, bloodstained mace, and that chilling smile as she bashed the monster's head made my whole body shiver involuntarily.

But contrary to my cowardice, Kaya approached me at the exit and bowed deeply.

"...I showed such disgrace. I'm sorry. It won't happen again."

'Actually, with your mentality at -89 now, it feels like I'm carrying a ticking time bomb.' I swallowed those words and patted her shoulder silently instead.

"Hope the next one's a rest area. Let's go."

"...Yes, Leader."

I noted how her response had gained a word as we headed to 1-3.

On the way to 1-3, I pulled out the small necklace from my bag. It was an artifact that always dropped from elites or bosses. Or rarely from treasure chests.

Artifacts were special items that applied to all characters once registered, but you couldn't register unlimited ones. Max was party size times 2—for a 4-man hero squad, 8 max. Replacing meant destroying the old one.

'First one, no reason not to. Register.'

It was a utterly plain artifact with a simple, modest effect, but thinking back to how our hero squad nearly collapsed over 1 damage in 1-2 made even this precious. Offering a +1 damage artifact to a party that almost exploded over 1 damage felt like it was mocking our situation.

1 damage, 1 HP, 1 defense, 1 speed. In The Long Terror dungeon, nothing was trivial.

Grrrowl—

Suddenly, a growl echoed through the dark corridor, stopping me in my tracks. Looking back, Kaya had her head down. I'd thought she'd be unfazed by something like this, but surprisingly not. No need to embarrass her more, then.

"Fighting that guy made me hungry."

I ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠pulled two combat rations from my bag and naturally handed one to her. She took it cautiously, then devoured it enthusiastically.

'She eats well.' Well, Kaya was tall and moved in medium armor like that, so she must have a lot of muscle mass. Thus, high calorie needs. The game didn't factor that, but in this blurry game-reality mix, it made sense. Plus, feeding when hunger popped recovered a bit of HP; ignoring it drained mentality, and unluckily HP too. Never starve them.

"Let's go."

"Yes, Leader."

Kaya seemed a bit more energetic after the food, but honestly, I was still on edge...

Pew—

"Fuck, that scared me!"

'Wow, traps every damn time. If Kaya had triggered it...'

Mentality -88 was like a glass full to the brim. One bump, and it spills and shatters. One critical hit, and Kaya's mind would break.

"Leader!"

"Ah, I'm fine."

'Better than you hitting a trap and shredding your mentality.'

Calming my startled coward heart, I advanced carefully, keeping lantern brightness above 50. Maybe because one trap triggered, or still early zone, no more traps. We reached 1-3 entrance safely.

'Please be a rest area. Please.'

‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠

Had I ever yearned for a rest area in 1-3 this badly? Theoretical odds: 25%. I glanced at Kaya and opened the door.

Creeeak—

Not a monster room. But if unlucky, an event room even deadlier than one had opened.