Chapter 10
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Translator: penny
Chapter: 10
Chapter Title: The Haggling Barbarian
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A few days after the ant subjugation ended.
In the middle of the oasis, the spoils of war were piled up like a mountain.
A huge pile of shells gleaming in the sunlight.
The 'magic stones,' mana cores from the desert ants, and the 'chitin shells,' said to be lighter and tougher than rock.
Precious alchemy ingredients that were impossible to obtain in the Empire, no matter how much you paid.
"How much is all this worth...?"
I picked up a single magic stone, held it up to the sun, and happily tapped away on my mental calculator.
This amount would easily cover two days' worth of the ducal house's budget, even roughly calculated.
Don't underestimate two days' budget—the ducal house's finances were on an astronomical scale.
At that moment, a warrior on sentry duty came running, kicking up a cloud of sand in his haste.
"Kel Bark! Kel Bark! Outsiders are approaching!"
"Outsiders? Enemies? Or another ant swarm?"
"No! Merchants on camels!"
Merchants?
In the middle of this desert?
What perfect timing. Did they sniff out the scent of ants—or rather, money—like ghosts?
I curled my lips into a sly grin.
"Let them in. We've got guests to welcome."
*
A short while later, a small trading caravan leading a dozen camels arrived at the oasis.
Their flag was embroidered with a flashy golden thread pattern reading 'Golden Camel.'
The plump middle-aged man who appeared to be the caravan leader groaned as he dismounted his camel.
Shiny silk robes, gold rings on every finger.
The picture-perfect look of a greedy merchant.
He scanned our warriors and flashed a sleazy smile.
In his eyes, we clearly weren't people—we were suckers ripe for the plucking.
"Well, hello there! Greetings, brave Yagur warrior friends!"
The caravan leader 'Gato' spread his arms wide in an exaggerated greeting.
His tone was subtly condescending, like he was soothing a dim-witted child.
"Not Yagur. We're Grom Kel."
He must not have heard that we'd driven out the Yagur tribe and taken this place.
The merchant burst into hearty laughter.
"Who cares what you call yourselves! What matters is what you've got!"
The merchant's eyes turned to our piled-up spoils.
"Ho ho! Haven't been here in ages, and you've gathered quite the haul? Huh? All those ant shells? Magic stones too?"
Gato's eyes gleamed with greed as they fixed on the pile of spoils.
I could practically hear him gulping from here.
Karack, standing beside me, thumped his chest proudly and boasted.
"That's right! We smashed them all! Grom Kel is strong!"
"Ooh, impressive, impressive! The mightiest warriors of the south indeed! I thought you were just brute force, but your hunting skills are top-notch too! Now, shall we take a look at the gifts this friend has brought?"
Gato nodded to his porters.
They hurriedly unpacked bundles and laid out goods on a mat.
Crudely carved glass beads, garishly colored scraps of cheap cloth, and mystery lumps of black jerky.
"Feast your eyes! 'Dragon meat' that even His Imperial Majesty can't get enough of! Eat this, and your strength will surge like never before!"
Gato waved the shriveled jerky around dramatically.
"And this is the 'Heavenly Bead'! A mystical gem that glows on its own at night. Carry it, and the desert spirits will flee in terror!"
It was third-rate con artist spiel if I'd ever heard it.
Heavenly Bead? Just a glass bead coated in glow-in-the-dark magic reagent.
But the naive barbarian warriors gathered around, eyes sparkling.
"Ooh...! Heavenly Bead...!"
"Dragon meat? Will we get stronger if we eat that?"
"The Emperor eats it... Must be valuable!"
Karack drooled as he shouted.
"Trade! Let's trade right now! I want that bead! Give us all the meat too!"
Gato's mouth split into a grin that reached his ears.
"Yes, yes! As expected of the chief—sharp eye! One sack of magic stones for this one bead—perfect match! I'm taking a huge loss, but for friends, special price... "
One sack of magic stones? For a single glass trinket worth thousands of gold?
This wasn't a scam; it was outright robbery.
But Karack, utterly clueless about economics, excitedly grabbed the sack of stones.
"Good! Take it!"
Just as the sack was about to change hands.
Grab.
I seized Karack's thick wrist.
"Huh? K-Kel Bark?"
"Put it down."
I spoke coldly and stepped forward.
"Oh dear, and who might this be? Quite the handsome fellow... "
Gato looked me up and down with a sneer.
My body had improved, but I still looked small compared to hulks like Karack.
In response, I picked up the 'dragon meat' jerky he'd offered and sniffed it.
Sniff sniff.
A foul stench assaulted my nose.
"......Slathered in pepper and nutmeg. And that sour tang... Pickled in vinegar?"
"Huh?"
"The meat's dark and mottled, texture all wrong. This isn't dragon meat—or even beef. It's camel from an old beast that died a month ago, on the verge of rotting. You masked the stink with heavy spices and vinegar."
I tossed the jerky at Gato's feet. Dust puffed up.
"Eat this, and you won't gain strength—you'll get food poisoning, your guts twisting for three days of nonstop diarrhea. Planning to wipe out our tribe?"
Gato's face stiffened.
"Wh-what are you babbling about? A barbarian like you knows meat?!"
"And this bead."
I picked up the 'Heavenly Bead' and held it to the sun.
The sunlight revealed the bead's shoddy interior in stark detail.
"Full of bubbles. Surface finish is botched. This is scrap from apprentice glassmakers in the Empire's southwest workshops—'cullet.' Costs less than a copper."
I tossed the bead in the air and caught it.
"The Emperor covets this? Imperial goods bear the imperial seal—nothing here. Impersonating His Majesty for fraud? That's lese-majeste. Minimum sentence: execution."
"......?!"
Gato's eyes bulged. His jaw dropped and wouldn't close.
It wasn't just spotting the fakes.
It was my speech.
Not the crude southern dialect.
Perfect enunciation, refined vocabulary, the languid yet imperious tone unique to nobility.
The parlance of the Empire's capital 'upper crust,' unheard by commoners in a lifetime.
"Y-you... What are you? Who?!"
Gato backed away in fear.
The man before him wore barbarian hides, but his bearing and knowledge screamed Empire nobility.
I chuckled and crossed my arms.
"Who? The barbarian chief you tried to fleece. Why so surprised? You came to trade—pay fair value."
I jerked my chin at the magic stone pile behind me.
"Desert ant magic stones. Size and clarity put them at B-grade or better. High mana content. Capital magic tower price: minimum 50 gold each. After transport and fees, 35 gold."
"......"
"And you offer a copper's worth of glass? Some line to cross even for a thief. 35,000% profit—what business ethic is that?"
I glared at him coldly.
"What's it gonna be? Chop your head for fraud and lese-majeste, hang it on the walls? Or pay full price and keep your life?"
Shing.
At my glance, Batu silently appeared behind Gato, bone dagger to his throat.
The cold blade pressed into his nape.
Karack finally realized he'd been duped, face flushing red-purple as he raised his axe.
"You bastards!!! Daring to trick Kel Bark! Me?!"
"Eek!! Sp-spare me!! I was blind!!"
Gato collapsed to his knees, groveling.
He'd thought barbarians were easy marks for a honey pot, only to hook a sharper, deadlier predator than any Empire noble.
The outcome was a resounding success.
No—a jackpot.
Gato tearfully emptied every gold coin he had to pay for the magic stones.
I even squeezed out three sturdy camels, real food, and all their spices under 'mental distress compensation.'
"Th-thank you... "
"Don't make that face, or I'll take your head. You're still coming out ahead, aren't you?"
"Y-yes!"
"Good. Come again—fair trade, always welcome."
I shook my now-bulging pouch as the caravan fled, kicking up sand.
Clink, clink.
The cheerful jingle of gold coins.
This must be what financial therapy feels like. My stuffed-up chest cleared right out.
Funds secured. Now, shopping.
I turned and asked.
"Aila. Closest city from here?"
"'Sand Port.' Neutral trade city, two days east."
Sand Port... Was that under Ayla Kingdom?
Should've studied geography harder.
As a chamberlain, I never traveled, so I skimped on maps.
"Size?"
"Top five in the south. Lots of Empire merchants, plenty of goods."
"Perfect. We're going."
"Wait, a city! Take me too! Kel Bark! I wanna see the city!"
Karack barged in cluelessly, wagging like an oversized puppy.
I shook my head firmly.
"No. You're too big."
"Big? Warriors are supposed to be big! Bigger means stronger!"
"No, you're too big. A 2-meter musclebound brute with a bloody axe? Guards won't open the gates. They'll ring the monster alarm. You stay and guard the tribe."
"......"
Karack drooped like the world had ended.
"Tch, not that! If even the strongest you leaves, who's protecting the tribe? They need mighty Karack here to feel safe."
Karack perked up at my consolation.
"R-right! I have to stay! Karack guards the tribe!"
"Yeah... "
Simpleton. That's why I can't help liking him.
This mission needs 'stealth' and 'elegance.'
"Party: me, Batu, and Aila. Three total."
Batu was assassin-type, great at hiding presence, and slim compared to Karack—hood up, he'd pass as a burly mercenary.
Aila knew southern geography, and dressed right... she'd look the noble lady. Perfect cover partner.
"But Kel Bark."
Aila asked worriedly.
"Can we even enter the city? Aren't barbarians banned, or sold as slaves if caught?"
"Don't worry about that."
I recalled the info I'd grilled out of Gato, grinning.
"Merchants say we're 'walking wallets.'"
"Wallets?"
"Yeah. Loaded but dumb—perfect marks. As long as no brawls in town, always welcome. Pay the toll, free pass."
Of all things, welcomed as suckers. Unbelievable.
Southern cities ran on pure capitalism.
But not this time.
They'd open the gates to a predator at their spines, not prey to fleece.
"Get ready. Polish off the sand and shine up. Let's go."
I gazed toward the hazy silhouette of the city beyond the desert haze.
The first step of my grand plan: 'Suit-Wearing Barbarian Legion' project.
"Look forward to it, Sand Port. I'm not the barbarian you think."