Chapter 1: I Ended Up in the World of Murim.
Translator: RaidenTL
Chapter 1: I Ended Up in the World of Murim.
And so, Lee Jae-won, having crushed the ambitions of the Heavenly Demon Emperor to rule the Murim, established an organization called the Cheonmu Alliance. He upheld the justice of the martial world and lived happily ever after, fathering many sons and daughters with his numerous wives.
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"Ugh, I actually slogged through that whole thing. Dammit."
Sun-woo threw his phone onto the bed.
The book he had been reading was a novel titled High School Senior Goes to Murim. It was a typical "Igo-kkaeng" story—a power fantasy about a high school student reincarnated into the Murim world who gains peerless martial arts through a lucky break, grows into an absolute master, and protects the world from an evil force seeking to dominate it.
The title was provocative and blatant enough that one could guess the plot without even reading it, but once you actually dove in, you realized it was an even bigger shitshow than expected.
The settings were crammed in haphazardly as if the author had ignored the concept of probability entirely. Perhaps due to the author's greed to portray a "genius" protagonist, every supporting character was depicted as an idiot, and the heroines were bland dolls who fell head over heels the moment they laid eyes on the main character.
At a glance, it looked like a textbook example of a mass-produced Igo-kkaeng wuxia novel, but it wouldn't be an exaggeration to say this work was of an even lower caliber than the average.
The most infuriating part of this novel was that it was so filled with sexual descriptions that it was hard to tell if the protagonist was on an adventure or just trying to get laid.
Starting with the master who first taught him martial arts, he went on to conquer junior sisters, peers, and seniors alike, writing a new legend in the genre of smutty wuxia.
After his official debut in the Murim, he encountered no fewer than six women poisoned by aphrodisiacs, each of whom happened to be the only daughter of one of the Six Great Clans.
To top it off, he even bedded the Saintess of the Demonic Cult, who appeared later as a mastermind, just to make the plot progression easier.
In this godforsaken book, there was a setting where anyone who had sex with the protagonist—whether they did it out of necessity or desire—would unconditionally fall in love with him.
What was even more absurd was that the protagonist's martial art was the kind of lecherous technique that grew stronger the more he slept around.
He should have been branded the Public Enemy of the Murim, yet every character in the novel was busy singing his praises.
It was a low-brow novel where everything—from the protagonist's power-ups to the plot development and conflict resolution—started with sex and ended with sex.
Of course, it wasn't as if wuxia novels filled with eroticism didn't exist.
If the author's original intent had been to focus on explicit sexual descriptions like those old pulp smut novels, he might have been able to overlook it.
But this novel wasn't even that. While it was true that erotic scenes took up a massive portion of the word count, they weren't even hot.
At least pulp wuxia is arousing because the descriptions are smutty; this novel’s prose was so poor that the sex scenes were just boring and tedious.
Sun-woo reflected on his past self for purchasing this novel in the first place.
It was a mistake to hit "Buy All" based on the title alone. He had forced himself to read it because he didn't want to waste the money, but after slogging through it like a chore, he was left with nothing but a lingering sense of unpleasantness.
"Seriously, what was the publisher thinking, releasing a novel like this?"
Sun-woo cursed the publisher more than the author.
In the past, when printing costs actually mattered, there was at least some sort of filtering process that prevented such disastrous novels from seeing the light of day. But since the rise of digital publishing, it seemed like even this kind of trash was being pumped out as long as it was provocative.
If an author goes off the rails, the publisher is supposed to stop them. If a story is this much of a mess, the publisher is more to blame.
He felt wronged. What had he done so wrong to end up picking such a piece of crap?
Driven by the thought that he couldn't be the only victim, Sun-woo went to the review section and began writing a critique with the intent of luring in another casualty.
It was a "fishing" post.
Fortunately, it seemed like very few people had read High School Senior Goes to Murim, or perhaps they felt it wasn't even worth the effort to comment, as the review section and ratings were empty.
There’s a saying that views are driven by ratings and reviews. It was proof of how much readers relied on them.
He gave it a perfect five-star rating and began writing a magnificent review.
Perhaps because his memory was unnecessarily good, it wasn't hard to twist the settings from the novel and add a bit of "flavor" to his words.
He continued with a stream of praise for the author and the work.
"There. I can't be the only one who suffered. You guys have to see this too."
Sun-woo read over the review he had created.
I've been reading wuxia for fifteen years, and this novel was so shocking that my life can be divided into 'before' and 'after' reading it. The title might seem childish at first glance, but the prose and story are so incredible they defy the title. With plot hooks cleverly hidden within the narrative and high-quality fanservice scenes, I lost track of time and was completely immersed in the world... (omitted)... If I were to recommend this to someone, I'd suggest it to aspiring or novice writers. You can learn so much from reading this just once. I truly believe it's a novel everyone should read at least once in their life. If such an interesting world existed, I would love to go there myself. Haha.
To anyone who had actually read the novel, this review was a blatant lie that would make them scoff. Yet, he took pride in the fact that nothing he said was technically false.
In his fifteen years of reading wuxia, it was indeed the first time he'd seen such a pathetic novel get published. The prose was indeed "incredible" in how disastrously it defied the childish title, and there were certainly plot hooks hidden in the story.
The author just never bothered to resolve them before the end. And while the descriptions weren't arousing, the situations themselves often were.
Furthermore, his comment about it being worth reading once in a lifetime was sincere. If an author writing such trash could get published, how much hope would that give to aspiring writers?
He had condensed a lot, but there were no lies.
By the time he finished his diligent review, the clock was nearing 11 PM.
Though he had wasted his energy on something pointless, Sun-woo felt a sense of satisfaction and flopped onto his bed.
'Let's order some chicken.'
He was drained, but sleep wouldn't come.
Since tomorrow was Sunday, it felt like a waste to just go to sleep. He needed a reward for his hard work.
There was only one sanctuary for his weary soul.
Ding.
Having ordered his golden, fried chicken, Sun-woo turned his phone back on to see if there was anything else to read. He intended to kill time until the food arrived.
'Huh?'
It was then.
When he opened the app, he saw a question mark icon at the top, indicating he had received a message.
'What's this?'
Sun-woo tapped the message with his index finger.
The title of the message appeared.
[Hello, I am the author of 'High School Senior Goes to Murim,' the work you reviewed.]
The opening was startling. He never imagined the author would actually send him a direct message.
Curiosity piqued, Sun-woo tapped the message to read the full content.
"Of course not. Who else would praise that piece of shit?"
Sun-woo felt a slight twinge of guilt. The author was genuinely moved by a review he had written just to troll people.
The message was getting weirder by the second. A gift? He didn't have a shred of fan spirit, but it would be rude to refuse a gift, so he planned to accept it.
"Gift, my ass. This guy is talking nonsense until the very end."
Sun-woo cursed the author a few times for the ridiculous drivel, moved the message to the trash, and hit the delete button.
But suddenly, his head began to spin.
"What...?"
Strength drained from his body, and his legs gave out.
He didn't even have the strength left to wiggle a finger.
His consciousness began to flicker and fade.
"Ah... fuck, my chicken..."
And just like that, Sun-woo lost consciousness.
Slap! Slap! Slap!
"Wake up, you brat! How long are you going to sleep!"
At the sound of someone hitting his cheek, Sun-woo opened his eyes to find a rough-looking man glaring down at him.
"Who... who are you?"
"Has this brat lost his mind? Get it together, Jang Sam!"
At the man's roar, Sun-woo's senses snapped back to attention.
He looked around.
His vision was filled with a crowd of people.
People were packed into large wooden seats, filling the room.
Every single one of them, dressed in traditional Chinese attire, was looking down at Sun-woo.
'Where the hell am I!?!?'
Sun-woo screamed internally.