Chapter 19
Chapter 19
.......
Clink, clatter. The sound of tableware echoed across the vast dining room. I wasn't the only person here. But I was the only one eating.
Yang Hye-in stood behind me to my right, and the chefs who had prepared the morning meal waited a little farther off, hands folded, eyes lowered. They would move the instant I gave an order, but until I opened my mouth first, those people would probably not utter a single word.
So no, I wasn't alone in the dining room. For all practical purposes, though, this was a meal eaten alone.
Honestly, until just yesterday it hadn't really bothered me. Ever since I came to this world, my biggest concern hadn't been escaping solo meals; it had been whether I could ever return to the world I used to live in, or how to behave inside Ye Sa-ra's body to stay as safe as possible.
Over the last two months, I'd more or less adapted, or so I told myself. But there was nothing to "adapt" to in Ye Sa-ra's life. Because in this mansion, no one asked anything of me.
As long as I observed the unspoken rule not to leave the mansion, I could wander anywhere inside, do whatever I pleased.
The heavy atmosphere of an old manor? The oppressive air between the staff?
The moment I realized I stood at the top of this household, none of it mattered. So what if the atmosphere was heavy? It was my house. So what if the air was oppressive? I decided whether those people kept their jobs.
In other words: there was nothing to be afraid of.
So I'd thought I'd settled into Ye Sa-ra's silent life without much trouble.
Clink, clatter.
Eating alone was familiar. Feeling completely alone in a mansion this large had become familiar.
But still.
Even believing I'd grown accustomed to it, yesterday's dinner kept surfacing in my mind, oddly persistent.
Not that we'd exchanged a single word during that meal. Everyone had been so focused on the steak in front of them that I doubt a question would have gotten an answer anyway.
But the fact that we hadn't talked during dinner didn't mean it was nothing but a stiff, uncomfortable hour.
For example.
Clink, clatter. As I worked my fork and knife now, I remembered how the sounds had layered over each other yesterday. They weren't all the same sound, either. The noise my utensils made was different from the noise Yu Ha-neul's made, or Lee Su-a's, or Shin So-hee's.
Lee Su-a moved with quiet regularity. She must have used a fork and knife many times before, honestly, she handled them far more gracefully than I did even after two months of practice.
Yu Ha-neul tried to follow my and Lee Su-a's movements but was a little rushed. That led to an occasional loud clatter of knife or fork against plate, though she seemed so focused on the steak itself that she never noticed.
Shin So-hee, at first, gamely tried to match the table's rhythm, awkward and careful—then gradually started carving her meat into larger pieces and shoving them in, until in the end she was practically staring down the steak and ignoring everything else. Naturally, her fork and knife made the loudest sounds of all.
The dining room had been too large for just three people. Even so, it had felt far more full than it does now, dining by myself.
...Was I really the type to miss human connection this much?
.......
I popped the last bite of toast into my mouth, wiped my lips with a napkin, and rose from my seat.
Yang Hye-in silently fell into step behind me.
Come to think of it, this woman followed me practically everywhere. When did she eat? I'd never once seen her having a meal.
I turned my head and glanced at her.
"Do you need something?"
Yang Hye-in was quick on the uptake.
"...No. No particular reason. Let's get ready for school."
"Understood."
Well, whatever. At school, at least, there was no reason I'd have to eat wrapped in silence.
Contrary to her game persona, Lee Su-a turned out to be rather quiet, but Yu Ha-neul would toss out all sorts of stories even when I didn't start the conversation.
At least one meal a day might feel normal.
As Yang Hye-in's hands guided me through changing clothes, I let my mind drift, holding onto that thought.
*
Yu Ha-neul always thought of herself as someone who got to school fairly early.
Since childhood she'd often been called meticulous, and Yu Ha-neul tended to agree she was pretty thorough when it came to preparation. Before entering Hwayeong High School she'd looked up all kinds of things, and that research was part of why she ended up arriving relatively early.
Hwayeong High School was for the children of wealthy families. Barring a tiny handful of students like Yu Ha-neul, whose tuition was waived and who never had to worry about fees, the cost of attendance was too much for an ordinary household to manage. It wasn't absolutely impossible if they stretched themselves thin, but almost no family was willing to abandon their daily lives and entire future just to send a child here.
Conversely, families who could afford it would send their children even if it meant a longer commute. With so many converging, it was only natural that every morning the entrance to Hwayeong High School, and to every school under the Hwayeong Academy Foundation, would become clogged with cars ferrying those children.
The school was designed with the traffic in mind, so there was ample space for vehicles to pull up, and the flow was well managed. There'd never been an accident. Still, caution never hurt.
But that notion had been shattered the moment Yu Ha-neul actually started attending Hwayeong High School.
Even when she thought she'd left early, there were already cars everywhere. Students walked toward the school in clusters, and when she entered the classroom, the kids who'd arrived first were gathered in small groups, chatting away.
There wasn't exactly a studious atmosphere. If you ignored the fact that most of those kids ignored her outright, the vibe was warm and friendly. Though that very warmth made the ostracism cut deeper when it came.
Slide.
When Yu Ha-neul opened the classroom door, the chatter would stop for a moment and eyes would turn her way. The kids, quickly deciding the newcomer wasn't worth their attention, returned to their own conversations and resumed their animated gossip.
Except for one person.
The one person who never looked away when Yu Ha-neul walked in.
With her rather sharp eyes, that girl swept her gaze upward from Yu Ha-neul's feet, taking her in. As her stare climbed toward Yu Ha-neul's face, those crimson eyes narrowed further and further, as though something displeased her. By the time her eyes reached Yu Ha-neul's face, the expression on an already angular, sharp-featured face had sharpened almost into a glare.
But the instant their eyes met, those keen eyes softened into a gentle curve. The lethality vanished from a look that could still put you on edge even when you knew it wasn't meant in earnest. What remained was a bewitching eye-smile that might charm even a fox, and the faintest hint of a grin at the corner of her lips.
Chin propped on her hand, she held the eye contact for just a beat, then turned her head back toward the window without a word. That, too, was very pointedly demure.
For the last several mornings, this had been the Ye Sa-ra whom Yu Ha-neul saw.
In this place, she was the only one who acknowledged Yu Ha-neul's greeting, the only one who reacted to Yu Ha-neul's words. Owning that thought made something tingle in her chest, a strange flutter. If this classroom were an ordinary place, she figured that feeling probably wouldn't exist.
Yu Ha-neul settled into the seat next to Sara as always. But today was a little different from the last few mornings. Normally she would have stayed quiet, not initiating conversation until some topic surfaced in her mind. Except today she'd brought something.
She rummaged through her bag and pulled it out. Even at the rustling sound, Sara, lost deep in thought, didn't turn this way. Truthfully, unless you deliberately called out to her or showed her something, Sara wasn't the type to show much interest in other people. At a glance she looked isolated from everyone around her, yet somehow seemed utterly indifferent to her own predicament, probably because of that detached attitude.
...Though, recalling the way dinner had gone last night, that wasn't quite the whole story.
After getting everything ready, Yu Ha-neul took a small, steadying breath. She was a little nervous. She'd done all kinds of things with her friends back in middle school, but there were still so many things she hadn't done with Sara. She couldn't easily predict how Sara would react.
But even so.
If you never stepped forward, some things would stay unknown forever.
Yu Ha-neul poked Sara in the ribs with her index finger.
"Eep!?"
Sara always made an adorable noise when startled. Yu Ha-neul felt a little guilty saying so, but honestly, she'd expected that poking Sara's side would earn her nothing more than a languid turn of the head and a curt "What?". The fact that the response was the complete opposite of that image only made it stand out more.
Someone nearby drew a sharp breath. The sound alone carried—nobody openly let their reaction show.
"What—"
Just as Sara, provoked into that undignified noise by the sudden poke, turned this way with a face full of indignation—
Yu Ha-neul seized the moment and slipped the chocolate she'd been holding into Sara's mouth.
It wasn't a big piece. Even with Sara's small mouth, the chocolate slid in without resistance.
...Ah. My finger touched her lips.
She pulled her hand away at once, but the sensation of that soft skin lingered stubbornly.
.......
Sara's eyes went round and she stared blankly at Yu Ha-neul. Yu Ha-neul felt her own face heating up. Should she make some excuse?
Sara worked her mouth briefly, then swallowed the chocolate down. Her gaze flicked over to the chocolate pouch Yu Ha-neul had placed on the desk.
"Want another one?"
The words rushed out to erase the awkwardness. Sara blinked once, then asked,
"Can I?"
"Yeah. I bought them so we could eat them together anyway."
It wasn't fancy chocolate, just a standard convenience-store bar, but it seemed sugary things really were a universal truth. Sara helped herself to the next piece without hesitation.
The wrist that reached for the chocolate looked especially slender.
During lunch, and again at dinner yesterday, the amount Sara ate was, by rough estimate, less than half of what Yu Ha-neul ate.
To build a healthy body you needed exercise, and to exercise you needed at least a baseline of stamina. Watching Sara end up in a groggy, half-dead state after barely a single lap, it was clear she needed to build up a more energetic body for basic fitness.
And the best way to do that was, of course, to feed her plenty of different things. If she couldn't eat much in one sitting, couldn't you just keep feeding her little by little, steadily?
Ideally with high-calorie things she also liked.
"...What are you staring at?"
Sara's eyes narrowed as she worked on her second chocolate. She was giving Yu Ha-neul a wary look for staring so intently.
She acts exactly like the Ice Princess most of the time, and then sometimes, oddly, she gives off this small-animal vibe.
"Nothing, really. You just look good eating."
.......
But even at Yu Ha-neul's answer, Sara's guarded expression didn't fade for a while.
She did eat two more chocolates, though.