Chapter 148
Chapter 148
So-ri was so energetic and innocent that I could easily imagine So-hee's own childhood looking exactly the same, but the more I watched the child, the more I had the strange sense that she was remarkably perceptive.
In particular, whenever I was lost in gloomy thoughts, So-ri always picked up on it strangely fast.
There was the time I sat at the dining table thinking about my mother and she asked, 'Are you sad?', but it went beyond that. Every time I watched this harmonious household, just the three of them: So-hee, her father, and So-ri, and found myself inadvertently thinking about my own relationship with my mother, So-ri would hurry over, take my hand, and pull me toward her family.
I had been in this house for only a few hours, yet I already found myself sitting comfortably among the three of them, and that was entirely thanks to So-ri, though, of course, So-hee had put in real effort to help as well.
Objectively, I was just a runaway imposing on their home, and yet the atmosphere here felt strangely more harmonious. Probably it wasn't simply because I came from a home where that wasn't the case.
"I guess... it's because of what happened when she was little."
It was late at night, and we were getting ready to turn in.
When I remarked that So-ri seemed incredibly perceptive, So-hee gave a rueful smile and answered.
"What happened?"
"Well..."
So-hee hesitated a moment at my question, then said,
"When So-ri was little... our mom went to heaven."
"Ah..."
Now that she mentioned it, I had seen So-hee's father, but not her mother.
It wasn't a surprise. If she were simply living apart for work reasons, it would've been normal for her mother to come up in conversation. Even now that I was staying here, it was something that ought to have been mentioned.
Even without that, I had naturally assumed the reason she never came up was that the separation wasn't for a good reason.
The same way I never brought up my own mother in front of my friends unless it was absolutely necessary.
Then again, since the reason for the separation was bereavement, the feelings So-hee's family held toward her mother were surely far more positive than the feelings I held toward mine.
"I'm sorry."
But still, I could empathize with that kind of loss, so I apologized.
"No, it's fine. It was something I'd have had to say eventually."
So-hee said it with a smile.
"Anyway, so, yeah..."
And she went back to what she'd been saying.
"Dad and I were both really struggling back then. Neither of us said a word at home, just cried every day. While we were stuck like that for a long time, So-ri, even though she was a lot younger than me, tried her best to comfort us however she could."
...
Maybe that was only possible because she was a small child who couldn't quite grasp the concept of death.
But still.
"I think maybe that's when So-ri started getting more sensitive to those kinds of feelings. It's all because I couldn't act like a proper older sister."
So-hee said it calmly, but the bitter tone that seeped through left me with nothing to say.
Come to think of it, this might be the first time in my life I'd ever shared this kind of heavy story with someone else.
I'd told my own past like I was hurling accusations, but I'd never listened to someone else's dark story before.
...
It felt a little uncomfortable.
I knew I shouldn't let that show. I was the one who'd voiced the question in the first place, and So-hee had simply answered.
"Ah, sorry, was that too depressing?"
The moment she realized a silence had settled between us, So-hee immediately snapped back to her usual cheerful self.
"No..."
The truth was, I was the one who should be apologizing.
But somehow, seeing that smiling face made me feel like apologizing would be wrong, so I just swallowed my words.
*
It was lucky the house had two bathrooms. That meant So-hee and I could share one without worrying about making anyone else wait.
The problem was that of the two bathrooms, the one near So-hee's room was so cramped that there was barely enough room to shower without soaking the toilet, not the kind of space where two people could wash up together like we did at the mansion.
We took turns showering, and I changed into the pajamas I'd brought. So-hee was, as always, in an oversized shirt and dolphin shorts.
It was already well past 11 p.m. If we didn't get to sleep soon, tomorrow was going to be exhausting, so we decided not to stay up talking and just go to bed. There was plenty of time, after all. I didn't plan on staying here for very long, but I'd still be here at least a few days.
We both got onto the bed as a test and found that even lying side by side, we could just barely manage without one of us falling off.
Considering So-hee's habit of starting in another bed but somehow ending up in mine by morning, it wasn't hard to imagine that one of us would wake up on the floor tomorrow. But I couldn't very well make my host sleep on the floor. And I didn't want to make things inconvenient because of me.
"Yeah, this is totally fine."
I did think the word 'fine' felt wildly out of place, but I decided not to argue.
"Alright, then, let's slowly—"
Just as So-hee was about to ask, "Shall we sleep?", the door clicked open and So-ri came in.
"Big sister~"
It was So-ri who had opened the door and come in.
She could barely keep her eyes open; one hand was rubbing at them while the other clutched a pillow to her chest.
"Oh, weren't you already asleep?"
So-hee asked, but So-ri just kept walking into So-hee's room with steps still clumsy with sleep.
"Let's sleep together~"
"Uh..."
At that, So-hee glanced my way.
Right.
So-hee had just come home for the first time in a while. So-ri, not to mention their father, adored her older sister. From what I'd heard, So-ri used to sleep with So-hee all the time, so it was only natural for her to want to sleep with her sister now that she was back.
"Ah, hey, So-ri..."
"Let's all sleep together, okay?"
Several years younger than us, So-ri had gone to bed before we did. We'd seen her father wait by her side until she fell asleep, then turn off the light and come out to the living room.
She must have woken up in the middle of the night and come looking for So-hee in this half-asleep daze.
"Ah..."
So-hee seemed to know exactly how her little sister felt. After a moment of hesitation, she gave a small nod and turned to me with a determined expression.
"Um, I'm really sorry, but I think I need to sleep alone tonight..."
So-hee said it with a genuinely apologetic look.
"It's fine."
After all, I'd always slept alone. Lately that hadn't been the case, but one night by myself wouldn't cause any problems.
"Okay, I'll go to So-ri's room tonight—"
So-hee started to get up, but then—
"Hye-in."
So-ri took a few more steps and came toward me.
"Big sister, you sleep with us too."
"...Huh?"
It was so unexpected that I couldn't form a proper response and just stared at her.
"Let's sleep together, okay?"
So-ri was looking up at me, still unable to open her eyes properly. Part of that was probably because she'd been sleeping in a dark room and her vision hadn't adjusted to the bright light in here, and part of it was because she'd been asleep just moments ago and was still half out of it.
"So-ri."
So-hee's voice was a bit stern.
"It's rude to act like that toward a guest."
"Ah, no."
Before I knew it, I was contradicting her.
"...Huh?"
So-hee looked at me with a blank expression—she hadn't expected me to say that either.
"...Ah, I mean..."
I hesitated a moment, then said carefully,
"I just... it's fine with me if we all sleep together..."
"...O-oh... really...?"
It seemed So-hee was just as cautious about it as I was.
*
In the end, we spread a blanket on the floor and lay down side by side, all three of us. No matter how small a child So-ri was, a single bed was far too narrow for the three of us.
So-ri must have been truly exhausted, because even on the hard floor with just a blanket underneath, the moment she lay down she began breathing in soft little puffs and slipped straight into sleep.
Watching her sleep with her chest rising and falling in small motions, she looked just like a demure little princess, which was a bit endearing.
"You could move up to the bed to sleep once So-ri's out."
"I'm sleeping like this because I want to."
...To be honest, this was the first time in my life I had ever slept on the floor.
Even with a thick blanket laid down, it honestly felt pretty hard. Lying here like this, I finally understood just how soft and plush the bed I usually slept in really was.
But still, I thought this was pretty enjoyable in its own way.
How do I put it—it didn't feel like having a sleepover with a friend so much as sleeping next to an actual little sister.
This was only the second time I'd met So-ri, and the first time I hadn't even met her in person, yet she already felt this familiar. Maybe it was because So-ri looked so much like So-hee?
I gently brushed the bangs from So-ri's sleeping face, and the resemblance to So-hee became even stronger.
...
With So-ri in the middle, we were lying on our sides, facing each other.
The room was dim, so I could barely make out So-hee's silhouette, but I had the feeling that the So-hee looking back at me was smiling.
*
W-w-w-what in the world is this situation?!
Shin So-hee was screaming internally.
Sure, So-ri was just So-hee's little sister, and she and Sara were complete strangers, but still...
Wasn't this setup exactly like a married couple lying face to face with their child between them?
Beyond So-ri, Sara was visible only as a faint silhouette, but So-hee couldn't bring herself to look straight at her.