38. Two Hearts, One Sincerity
38. Two Hearts, One Sincerity
June signaled the approaching summer, and for university students, it meant impending final exams.
As the sunny spring of May ended and June began, it became increasingly difficult to look away from the looming finals.
During this time when many students walked around with tired faces carrying heavy textbooks, Ryu Baek-seol was also preparing for her final exams at home.
"Huu."
As she organized case precedents and legal interpretations on paper—reading them alone made her head feel stuffy—Baek-seol gently pressed her aching eyes with her fingers and leaned her head back.
Just as she decided to take a short break, a breeze blew through the open window, sweeping past her hair. Even in the late night wind, she could feel the humidity and warmth of summer gradually mixing in.
Getting up from her seat, Baek-seol brewed a cup of coffee before approaching the window, leaning against it with her elbows as she gazed outside.
The city, as if even the air had fallen asleep, was quiet and dim. Though some lights were on, they merely obediently shimmered within the deep tranquility of the night.
"......"
Taking a sip of coffee, Baek-seol's thoughts naturally drifted to a scene she had been frequently recalling lately.
'Want to go on a trip during break?'
A trip. Thinking about it, this was actually the first time So-jeong had proactively suggested traveling together.
When she mentioned this, So-jeong smiled bashfully and said:
'I thought it wouldn't be so bad if I made the suggestion first for once.'
She added that this time, she wanted to plan the trip herself.
Curious about So-jeong's travel plans and hearing her speak with unusual confidence, Baek-seol readily agreed. So-jeong then nodded as if steeling herself and promised to send the dates after finals.
"I wonder what's gotten into her all of a sudden."
Muttering to herself while sipping her coffee, a small smile nevertheless lingered on Baek-seol's lips.
Since the day they had become physically intimate, So-jeong seemed brighter than usual. Baek-seol thought it was because she had confided her biggest secret to her.
Baek-seol was happy to see her like that. She thought that kind, pretty So-jeong suited that bright, smiling appearance. Just like a fully bloomed flower is even more beautiful under clear sunlight.
And, seeing her gradually escape from the Shadows of the Past made Baek-seol feel like she was repaying at least a small part of the debt she owed So-jeong.
'Please. Could I... could I at least listen to your story?'
"......"
The desperate words So-jeong had spoken that day on the bridge, looking up at her as the rain fell unpleasantly, echoed vividly once more in Baek-seol's mind.
Even years later, the scene from that day remained as vivid as if it had happened yesterday. As if it were etched not in her mind, but in her soul.
But ironically, So-jeong herself didn't even seem to remember who she had saved that day. Perhaps it was because Baek-seol had been standing with her back to the streetlight.
'Well, if I'm really as kind a person as you say, Baek-seol... that would be because of you. It's thanks to you that I'm here now.'
Recalling what So-jeong had said at the pub, Baek-seol let out a soft chuckle and raised the corner of her mouth.
"Who are you to say that..."
The saying that truly kind people don't even know they're kind was absolutely right.
To look at the person she had saved, the person who gave her a reason to live and brought color into her monochrome life, and say it was thanks to that person that she was here now.
"Well, it's not like I'm in a position to talk, since I haven't revealed it yet."
Baek-seol had never revealed that the reason she had helped So-jeong all this time was because she loved her, because she owed her her life.
>
She knew So-jeong wasn't that kind of person, but she couldn't bring herself to tell her out of fear that, just maybe, So-jeong would come to dislike her if she learned her good deeds were hypocritical and calculated.
So Baek-seol hid her true feelings, planning to slowly fade into a memory as just a past connection once So-jeong moved past her trauma and got along well with others. She thought wanting anything more would be a sin.
But fate had pushed So-jeong and Baek-seol into a strange relationship again. Before they knew it, the two were sharing So-jeong's biggest secret and pleasuring each other's bodies... becoming something more than friends but less than lovers—a peculiar relationship.
If Baek-seol suddenly created distance in this relationship as originally planned, it would ultimately only hurt So-jeong more.
Adding to that, the fact that Baek-seol knew So-jeong's secret while So-jeong remained unaware of her hidden feelings only deepened the weight of Baek-seol's internal guilt.
"......I can't keep hiding this forever."
When So-jeong suggested the trip, Baek-seol made up her mind.
During the trip, she would confess the secret she had been hiding all this time.
She couldn't imagine what would happen after that, and she didn't even want to think about it. Imagining So-jeong disliking her made her newly found resolve feel like it would shatter like ice.
But she felt that only then would the invisible knot in her heart, and in their relationship, finally loosen.
And most of all, Baek-seol wanted to resemble So-jeong's pure heart.
That heart which, like spring sunlight, had seeped into her own and conveyed a gentle warmth.
Even if just for a moment, she wanted to face that So-jeong without hiding, without shame.
"......Huu."
Baek-seol let out a sigh filled with slightly complicated emotions.
No breath was visible in the warm night air, but the white steam rising from her mug scattered into the deep navy night sky in its place.
***
Though the breeze coming through the open window was pleasantly warm, So-jeong couldn't focus on studying for her finals at all.
Staring as if she might get sucked into the small smartphone screen, So-jeong muttered to herself and tapped on the touch panel with her finger.
"How to...... confess...... to a friend."
Countless results and links poured forth, but none of the suggested answers appealed to So-jeong.
"Ughhh......"
Frowning as she stared at the screen, So-jeong soon let out a frustrated sigh and flopped down onto the mattress.
>
Confession.
Confessing to a friend.
Just repeating those words in her head made her chest feel strangely fuzzy.
To begin with, she wasn't even sure if these feelings toward Baek-seol were love. After all, So-jeong had never been in love with anyone before.
She had even wondered if she was mistaking the sexual desire that came with becoming a Futanari for love.
But when she recalled the smiles Baek-seol occasionally showed, her kind words, and their kiss that day, So-jeong's heart swelled with a feeling entirely different from sexual desire. Like a hot air balloon flying freely through a clear sky.
That's why So-jeong had suggested the trip to Baek-seol. To confirm her feelings once more.
And to ask if it was okay for her, a woman, to like Baek-seol, also a woman, as more than a friend.
"......"
If Baek-seol refused. If she came to dislike her for having these feelings.
Just imagining it made So-jeong's heart feel too heavy to bear.
"No."
But So-jeong shot upright and clenched her fists.
"I can't run away."
Ironically, as she steeled her resolve, what came to So-jeong's mind was Baek-seol—the very source of her internal conflict.
So-jeong had always wanted to be like Baek-seol, who always appeared strong.
'Han So-jeong. Hold my hand.'
Ever since she took that hand that saved her during her hellish time, So-jeong had been watching Baek-seol's back.
She had continued to chase after the silent yet always supportive figure of Baek-seol.
Following her frantically, she discovered that the nightmares of her past that had been eating away at her were gradually fading.
The ground no longer swayed when she stood before people, and the sky no longer distorted strangely when she was in a crowd.
She was able to make a good friend like Choi Ha-na.
She came to understand the feeling of liking someone.
"......"
So-jeong's life was Baek-seol. From the day she took Baek-seol's hand, So-jeong's life had continued.
Because of that, So-jeong didn't want to hide these feelings.
She didn't want to hide this growing sincerity from her.
She wanted to show Baek-seol, who had cared for her until now, even if just for a moment, that it was thanks to her that she had become this strong.
Even if the result meant letting go of that hand that had always held her.
"Ah."
As she was solidifying that resolution, something suddenly flashed through So-jeong's mind.
Picking up the smartphone she had tossed carelessly on the mattress, So-jeong quickly moved her fingers to search for something.
"......Found it."
What appeared on the screen wasn't a method for confession, but an information window showing the map and operating hours of a certain place.
Having found the information she wanted, So-jeong busily moved her hands again to set a date and make a reservation.
After finishing the reservation, So-jeong hugged her smartphone and tightly closed her eyes.
She didn't know what to wish for, or who to wish to.
But with her eyes closed, So-jeong simply wished, filled with sincerity, and wished again.