The One Who Gazed Into the Abyss (9)

When I opened my eyes, Panzy Vlad was lying in the bed beside mine, and Eve was slumped over in the caregiver's chair, fast asleep. In a hazy daze, I quietly checked my body. The places that had felt like they'd been stabbed with a knife were completely gone. Seeing Eve here, she must have rushed over the moment I lost consciousness and healed me.

In the darkness, I glanced toward Panzy. It looked like her wounds hadn't been treated. Even though we'd talked several times, the fact that Eve hadn't even spared her a glance left a bitter taste in my mouth, and I smiled wryly. Eve didn't open up to others ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠easily, more than she appeared to. She seemed especially wary of Panzy and Dorothy, though I couldn't figure out why. It felt like watching a cat hissing at someone invading its territory. I seriously wondered if Eve needed some kind of socialization training—like keeping them separated by bars at first until they got used to each other's faces.

"Panzy. How long was I out?"

"You lost consciousness right after the spar ended... Looking at the time now... You weren't out for that long. Must be thanks to Eve Abraham."

"It looks like more than twelve hours to me? It's already dawn."

"Haha... Still, you should be grateful you woke up looking perfectly fine after taking injuries like that. Care to step out with me for a bit?"

Panzy let out a small groan as she sat up, as if her wounds weren't fully healed yet. Startled, I fumbled to help support her, but she shook her head and stopped me.

"This kind of thing is common for knights. Even wounds like these are obstacles that anyone who dreams of becoming a knight must overcome. There's no need to worry."

"Y-yeah, but..."

"It was a little... disappointing that Eve Abraham didn't even glance my way, but her holy power isn't a public resource. It can't be helped."

Seeing Panzy smile bitterly, it seemed like she was more hurt than I'd thought. I'd have to set aside some time later to arrange a proper meeting so they could get to know each other. Since we'd keep running into each other anyway, staying this guarded couldn't be good for anyone.

Panzy limped slightly as she walked out of the infirmary with me. It was the middle of the night, with everyone else asleep. We left the sparring grounds and walked along a path where insects chirped softly in the grass.

"That was truly incredible magic. I'm impressed all over again."

"Ahaha..."

Come to think of it, Panzy still didn't know that it was actually spirits. I couldn't keep hiding it behind the excuse of a trade secret forever. Honestly, even I only knew that the power I used was called spirits.

"Panzy. Since you fought me, you already know... That thing I called a trade secret... It wasn't magic."

"Hmm... I'm not that familiar with sensing mana, but... I see. So it wasn't magic..."

"I don't know the details either. It's something called... spirits..."

I told Panzy everything I knew about spirits. How they used the mana of nature itself, without any artificial conversion of power, allowing them to manifest any desired attribute. How spirits possessed free will and materialized through contracts. Even how Shub and Eve had been helping with my training and researching them. Panzy nodded quietly, listening attentively. She blinked in surprise a few times, letting out little "oh" sounds of admiration. She was the perfect listener.

"So there was never any need for incantations or magic circles in the first place. That's why you could fight so quickly."

"Hahaha... Even so, I still couldn't win."

Honestly, it pissed me off a little. Being stuck among all these privileged bastards, flailing around like a cockroach just to survive. It reminded me too much of ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠my old self back in the modern world—getting knocked around, falling down, and burning with resentment. It put me in a really bad mood.

"Cain?"

"Huh? Oh... I just remembered something unpleasant."

Come to think of it, that protagonist bastard was out of his mind too, trying to burn the world down with a demonic sword. What a fucking miserable life I have.

"Speaking of which... We made a promise, didn't we?"

"Hm? A promise? Oh..."

Right. Panzy had promised to tell me how she'd gotten injured in the violence circle. I nodded. Whoever could hurt someone with her level of skill was important information for me too.

"The one who cut my left shoulder—the one that nearly became the decisive factor in today's defeat... was Alex."

"..."

I'd expected it to some degree, but hearing it directly still felt a bit hollow. Why had she gone out of her way to hide that it was Alex who'd cut her? Was it knightly pride that wouldn't allow it? Was she embarrassed?

When I looked at her with a face full of questions, Panzy's cheeks flushed and she stammered.

"It seems you're curious about the r-reason I didn't say anything."

"Yeah. Depending on the situation, I might have to beat the shit out of that guy."

I meant it. At the very least, he shouldn't lay a hand on the people around me. If I beat him half to death and drilled into him that he shouldn't even approach Cain, maybe the scenario could proceed as planned while I handled things my own way.

"Y-you're getting that angry on my behalf..."

Her expression brightened considerably. As expected, Panzy wanted revenge on that bastard too...

"I already gave you the answer to that last time."

"Hm? Last time? Um..."

I tried to recall our previous conversations, but nothing specific came to mind. If she'd hinted at the reason back then, there was no way I would've missed it... Seeing that I still didn't get ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠it, Panzy's face grew even redder. She frowned slightly—rare for her—and spoke.

"Y-you really don't remember... I thought you'd definitely notice..."

"Huh? Ah, j-just give me a second. I'll think about it properly."

"No. How could someone who aims to be a knight beat around the bush like this? I'll say it with my own m-mouth..."

In the predawn darkness, with the sun about to rise again, Panzy's face burned brighter than anything else as she squeezed the words out.

"Ah..."

"I'll handle my own affairs. I will definitely hold Alex accountable. I've already informed Senior Dorothy as well."

What, so it was like a sweaty bromance kind of thing? Unfortunately, I'd turned down that kind of sweaty friendship in my previous life too. The old me who only went between the company and home, living a lonely existence, had been far removed from anything like sweaty friendships. Man! I really had lived such an empty life! What an idiot I was! Me, from South Korea!!

"Sweaty friendship. So that's what you were after?"

"What? Um... sweaty friendship... um..."

Was it just my imagination that Panzy's expression darkened instantly?

The sun rose, and the final day of the sparring matches dawned. The students busily made their way to the arena. What they were looking forward to more than anything was the match between the top and runner-up of the Magic Department. It was sure to be a dazzling spectacle, putting on a performance similar to yesterday's match.

Of course, since I'd been one of the participants in yesterday's fight, I couldn't watch it with the same impressed eyes. They got to enjoy the show while I didn't. Fuck. I want to watch something fun too! Cain deserves to have a good time!

When I told Eve and Panzy—who had come out with me—what ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠I was thinking, they just gave me awkward looks and didn't respond. Hmph. You guys don't understand my heart! Only Cain is miserable!

As I took my seat in the stands, a few students who recognized me cautiously greeted me. "Your spar was impressive." "You're in Class D but your skills are amazing," and so on. It seemed my image had improved dramatically thanks to the fight with Panzy.

"Hehe~ Cain. Doesn't it feel like people's gazes have changed a bit?"

"It's probably gone from looking at a crazy person to looking at a crazy person and a clown. I can at least tell that much apart."

"Hahaha. Still, isn't it better than everyone avoiding you? At least now they're approaching first."

"Hmm..."

I wasn't used to people approaching me at all. When I gave an awkward, half-hearted reply, Panzy let out a small chuckle and didn't ask any more questions after that.

Most of today's matches were between different classes, like me and Panzy. The problem was that students from the lower classes were getting completely one-sided beatings. It was so brutal that I started wondering if there was match-fixing involved. Watching those students get crushed made me feel a little uneasy. It was like seeing the prelude to the so-called "Spoon War" that would begin after Act 1 ended. Seeing aspects of the world that hadn't been shown in the game felt strangely fresh.

As I watched the matches with those thoughts in mind, I soon heard the announcement that Shub and Elua's match was about to begin. Elua Arcana confidently ran out from my direction and took her stance. And from the opposite side, Shub slowly walked out.

"Shub?"

Why the hell was Shub wearing Dainsleif?

Not only me, but even Eve sitting next to me jumped up from her seat in shock. Something was wrong. Eve and I looked at each other, sharing the same thought.

"Something's off."

"Yeah... Cain... That..."

Panzy, who didn't know what was going on, looked puzzled by our reactions. She must have sensed that something was wrong too, because she examined Shub's appearance and her face filled with surprise.

"That... sword. It's Alex's sword."

As expected, since she'd been cut by it herself, she recognized it immediately. Shub stood in front of the arena with heavy, powerless steps. She lifted her face with unfocused eyes and scanned the stands. She seemed to be looking for someone. Probably me.

I stayed standing so she could see me clearly. Shub's eyes met mine. It was as if time had stopped. She didn't react at all to what the referee was saying.

"Student Shub. Um..."

Shub didn't even respond to him. She just kept staring at me. Her body twitched slightly. She was struggling, trying to break free even for a moment from something invisible. She squeezed her eyes shut several times before opening them again, her lips moving silently toward me.

All the sounds around me disappeared. Only Shub's silent scream remained, echoing through the arena. In that moment, the referee, the audience—nothing else existed in that place. Her mouth moved slowly. She formed words that couldn't be heard. Desperately. As if I would definitely understand.

Shub simply gave a sorrowful smile.