Before You Sign, Did You Think It Through?
He headed toward the location she had sent via KakaoTalk, pulling his car to a stop in front of a coffee shop. Through the window, he could see her sitting inside, and the presence of many other people put his mind at ease. He hadn't even brought a driver; he had driven himself. One could never be too careful. He walked inside slowly, made his way toward where Eunbyul was sitting, and took a seat with caution.
"Did you bring it? Oh, you didn't open it, did you?"
"Yeah... since you told me not to, Secretary Eun..."
Her voice was trembling, her speech hesitant, and her movements cautious. Sensing this, Eunbyul offered a relaxed, smug smile as she looked at him, telling him there was a single sheet of paper inside the envelope and that he should take it out and read it.
"Read it all, and if you're okay with it, sign at the bottom."
This contract is entered into by Han Suhyun (hereinafter 'Party B') and Eun Byul (hereinafter 'Party A') on Thursday, August 22nd, between approximately 22:00 and 23:00, based on the fact that Party B engaged in continuous sexual molestation and remarks falling under the category of sexual harassment. This contract is concluded on the condition that Party A keeps silent regarding the situation at that time.
[Article 1] Party B shall, on the condition that Party A remains silent regarding the criminal damage received from Party B, continue to caress specific body parts of Party A whenever Party A requests, until Party A instructs to stop.
[Article 2] There are no restrictions on the 'specific body parts' mentioned in the previous article. The authority to designate details regarding timing, location, duration, and specific acts rests solely with Party A.
[Article 3] Party B shall, on the condition that Party A remains silent regarding the criminal damage received from Party B, truthfully state, without falsehood or exaggeration, the events that occurred between Party B and his ex-wife, Seo Jia, whenever Party A requests. Furthermore, Party B has the obligation to sincerely answer all questions Party A may have.
[Article 4] Party B shall respond within 1 hour without delay when Party A calls using electronic communication equipment or other specific media. Exceptions are made only if Party B is unable to respond due to specific conditions such as being asleep.
[Article 5] Party B shall comply with sexual intercourse if Party A desires. Furthermore, Party B may control all other actions and tones of voice of Party A.
[Article 6] Party B cannot maintain intimacy with his ex-wife, Seo Jia. If Party B has sexual intercourse with his ex-wife, he must report it and submit a written statement including the contents of Article 7 of this contract within 72 hours, via wireless communication, landline, written document, or face-to-face verbal statement.
[Article 7] The essential contents required when writing the statement in Article 6 are as follows: Contraception status (e.g., whether a condom was used, method of medication, etc.), number of ejaculations by Party B, duration of the relationship, and location of the relationship.
[Article 8] Limitation of Contract: If Party B refuses or fails to comply with any of the clauses specified in this contract, Party A shall notify Party B of the breach within 24 hours and submit a petition, accusation, or complaint to two or more of the following institutions—'National Police Agency, Prosecution Service, Integrated Support Center for Sexual Assault Victims, Sunflower Center, Sexual Assault Crisis Center'—reporting the facts of sexual molestation and harassment (facts of physical molestation such as kissing, caressing breasts, etc., and audio files obtained within the office, and remarks such as 'your lips are delicious' and 'call me Master') and requesting criminal punishment for Party B.
If you agree to the above contract, sign below.
Party A: Eun Byul (Signature)
Party B: Han Suhyun (Signature)
"Are you out of your mind? Oh, no..."
"What was that, Senior?"
As he looked at her after reading the contract, letting out a hollow laugh in disbelief, she was looking back at him, giggling as if even that were hilarious. She urged him to sign if he had finished reading, and he, momentarily thinking that calling 'Party A' crazy was a slip of the tongue, covered his mouth and fumbled in his pocket with his other hand for a pen. When she offered him a pen, he took it, and before signing, he asked, "Won't you regret this?"
"...."
"Hmmmm~"
"...If I don't do it, I'm a sex offender, so what choice do I have..."
"Yeah~! Exactly, you have to do it..."
I don't know what's so enjoyable for her, but fine. I'm the 'Party B' here. I sign. Holding the neatly signed contract, he shoved his fist into his mouth and gnawed on it, thinking that his life was truly spiraling into the abyss. At the same time, he thought, 'This is why I don't hire female secretaries. I need to throw Eunbyul into another department immediately. This crazy bitch... she was a crazy bitch too,' but then he noticed the paper he was holding reflecting the fluorescent light, revealing small black letters on the back. Realizing this, he hurriedly flipped the contract over.
And then,
[Article 9] From the moment of signing this contract, 'Party A' can claim ownership over 'Party B'. The 'ownership' referred to in this clause means everything excluding fundamental rights that cannot be infringed upon, such as personality and human rights, and assets such as money.
[Article 10] Special Provisions: From the moment of signing this contract, Han Suhyun has the obligation to faithfully do whatever Eunbyul desires. Examples of 'what she desires' include going out on dates whenever Eunbyul calls, and having sex after the date or immediately without a date if Eunbyul desires. 'Sex' includes the act of only caressing Eunbyul's body, the act of Eunbyul only caressing Han Suhyun, and all general sexual intercourse between a man and a woman.
[Article 10-1] Han Suhyun shall, if Eunbyul desires, ejaculate inside Eunbyul's body regardless of time and space. No right of refusal or objection can be exercised against this.
[Article 10-2] Eunbyul possesses the right to become pregnant with Han Suhyun's seed whenever she desires. Eunbyul has no obligation to mention to Han Suhyun whether the timing of the ejaculation in the previous clause is during her ovulation period or after menstruation.
[Article 10-3] Eunbyul has the right to reside in the same house as Han Suhyun when she is considered to have conceived Han Suhyun's child by having sex only with him. Furthermore, after learning of this fact, Han Suhyun is prohibited from all forms of abortion, including surgical methods or drug-induced abortion. This prohibition clause also implies that no requests or mentions of such can be made.
[Article 10-4] If Han Suhyun becomes aware of the fact that Eunbyul is pregnant with his child, he must 'register the marriage' with Eunbyul within 24 hours without delay. To this end, within 24 hours from the time of signing and sealing the original copy of this contract, Eunbyul shall provide a marriage registration form with her personal details, name, etc., detailed, for Han Suhyun to keep.
He saw the back page and trembled, immediately trying to tear up the contract, but Eunbyul's hand was faster. Watching him tremble, she smiled faintly, tucked the contract away, and sat on it. She cupped her flushed cheeks with both palms, her laughter gradually settling into a blissful smile.
"...Haa, Senior..."
"You, you..."
"How could I hate it when I was held by the person I like and had my breasts sucked? I don't have the slightest intention of making you a criminal, Senior."
Whether he was filled with rage or not, Eunbyul bit her lip, looking thrilled, and spoke in a slightly higher pitch.
"That's right. I was too naive in college, so I didn't know. Yeah... that's right. So I'm going to do things a little differently now... I'm going to bind you to me, Senior. But I won't be like those 'sponge wives' they talk about on the internet."
"From now on, Senior, you have to caress me whenever I want. I think my body is quite pretty, so I think you'll like it too. I'm two years younger than you, you know. Oh, maybe you don't know because there's a one-year grade difference, but I graduated early. High school, too. So I was nineteen when I was a freshman."
"Does it feel good to think about getting a junior who's two years younger than you pregnant? My heart flutters just thinking about making a baby while held in the arms of the man I have to serve as 'General Manager' at work... Ever since I got home yesterday, I wanted to go to work early because I was thinking about writing this contract. I was thinking, 'He doesn't seem to remember at work, so I should bring it up sometime'..."
This woman, this nine-tailed fox...
"Senior, that's why I told you to review the contract carefully before signing."
"You... what kind of crazy person puts it on the back of the contract..."
"Don't you know? A. Two. Sided. Contract?"
She whispered with a bright smile, then winked one eye and laughed as if he were pathetic.
"This is why I can't help but like you, Senior... You're incredibly intelligent and smart, but this feeling of being a bit of a klutz... it's so unexpected and refreshing."