Under the Starry Night
She hesitated for a long time, wondering how to explain herself, before finally blurting out an excuse. "...It’s just that, Master, at the time, you were a year younger than me... but it felt like you were five years younger."
"Add the fact that you completely ignored your ex-husband."
"No, that’s not it. I’m just saying that’s how it was in the past."
"Which is exactly why you're my ex-wife."
"..."
He decided to hear her out. Honestly, even though they had divorced quickly, there were too many things he still couldn't understand. He grabbed two cans of beer from the refrigerator, cracked one open, and downed it in one go. His thirst was intense.
"And that business failure... it was just, you know..."
"What about it?"
"There were times when I felt you were mature, but back then... well... I talked to my friends, and I only believed what I saw on the news... I trusted the TV, so I had no choice but to believe that the failure was your fault."
He didn't say anything to that. Other employees had done the same when they first heard the news, badmouthing him whether he was present or not. But that didn't mean he accepted it.
"You were my wife."
"...*Hic*,"
"...But what are you doing acting just like everyone else?"
"...I’m sorry. I was truly out of my mind..."
"We were living together. You could have asked me why I was in that situation. You could have asked what caused it, how it happened, or what we could do to make things okay..."
At that point, he, like her, was reminded of the past. The feeling that everything was a nuisance, pathetic, and like children playing at business. Both he and she remembered her saying that listening to his explanations would just be a waste of time.
"...Your reaction was truly f*cking terrible. That’s right."
"I’m sorry. I was short-sighted."
He gathered his thoughts again. "No, but seriously, f*ck. The more I think about it, the more it pisses me off. So, all the things you said to me were just because the news said the same thing, so you decided to do the same?"
"...There was something else, too."
"What is it, you b*tch?"
"...Whenever I worked, I met other high-ranking people... and their gazes were always full of pity. Asking how I could manage when my husband was struggling so much... things like that..."
He clutched his chest as if he were suffocating. "No, f*ck, don't you think I had all that figured out? Look, I have over 10 trillion won now. Even back then, if you hadn't helped me, I would have just written a promissory note to my father and paid it back. It wasn't even that big of a deal. My father has lost trillions from a single bad contract before. The level of people who look down on others for things like that is exactly where they belong."
He used to frequent gatherings where such people congregated. And the people he saw there were largely divided into two groups: those who only looked for the negative aspects of a specific person to criticize them—trying to find a 'kill shot'—and those who tried to view even those flaws in a positive light.
Around that time, he remembered a conversation he’d had with Eunbyul while they were sitting on the deck at dawn, exhausted from pulling on ropes.
"...You know, General Manager."
"What."
"...I’m sorry about the company dinner. For acting so strangely."
It was an embarrassing memory, so he shook his head. "Don't mention that."
"...But you know. Other than that, I’m not sorry for anything else."
"What do you mean..."
He recalled everything from what Eunbyul had said at the drinking party to her arbitrarily finding out about his divorce and revealing that she knew. As they talked, he mentioned graduating, getting married, working at the company, and various other events. She told him how she had graduated early and waited for him, and how she had studied hard for the recruitment exam because she wanted to work at the company he was at.
"...Why did you get married?"
"I don't know. I must have been crazy back then."
"Then why did you divorce?"
"Because I was sick of that person."
He said it without hesitation. Because he was sick of her. He was sick of Seo Jia. He didn't want to hear her talk about divorce or nag him anymore. He was tired of a woman who, despite him having borrowed a little money in the past, still looked down on him, criticized him, and acted exactly like the yellow press. Even if everyone else cursed him, shouldn't his own wife think based on facts? At the very least, shouldn't she hear the full story before reaching a conclusion? Honestly, he had only endured it because he had a good personality; anyone else would have divorced her immediately. No matter how coolly he covered it up and moved on, he hadn't directly caused a major accident back then.
"Sick of her... I see."
"Why?"
"Actually, I thought you would have divorced even earlier, Senior."
Her honorifics had changed suddenly, but he didn't pay attention, too busy looking at the swaying ship and the night sky above. She spoke in a clear but quiet voice.
"Why is that?"
"My friends, and the people around me... the people who claimed to be close didn't help when it mattered most."
"Hmm."
Seo Jia immediately came to mind. He didn't know what had happened to her, but he felt a sense of kinship with Eunbyul.
"The people who act like they'd give you their organs if you asked, they just leave when I’m struggling."
"..."
"That’s why I searched for everything I could about GPL while watching the news back then. I was curious. I wanted to know why it failed when you were the one who did it. ...In my heart, Han Suhyun is still a wonderful person without a single flaw."
To hear such praise not from his wife—no, his ex-wife—but from another woman. He didn't know whether to be happy or annoyed. So he said, "Eunbyul, you're good at social life. Are you going to get promoted?"
"If we save this ship, wouldn't I be promoted for sure? The youngest section chief in history!"
"I think 'Secretary Eun' or 'Assistant Eun' is better than 'Section Chief Eun'. Easier to call."
"Are you planning on calling me often? Then I might have to delay it by about a year~"
She joked, then watched him chuckle and let out a small, happy laugh before continuing.
"Senior, looking at acquaintances and people, I think there are two types."
"...What kind?"
"One type looks at me favorably even if I trip on the street. Like, 'Oh, you fell so naturally, are you hurt?' That kind of thing."
"..."
"The other type, even if I’m just walking, says my shoe design is bad, or that I’m ugly, or my hair is too long or too short. That I have skin problems. That my fashion is trash. And when someone like that appears, the people around them join in to tear me down too."
He listened in silence.
"Do you know what I thought when I saw you failed?"
"Why, did you think I did something wrong too? Thinking about it now, it’s embarrassing. Ah, f*ck, even people I haven't seen in a long time must know."
"...Your image will change by tomorrow. Anyway..."
Eunbyul continued. "When I go home, I watch internet broadcasts as a hobby."
"I watch them too. That weird one with the sunglasses..."
"The one I watch. The BJ said something like this. Using a photo of an old couple leading a donkey..."
Eunbyul recounted what she had heard, remembering it clearly. As if the video were playing right in front of them: if they didn't ride the donkey, people bitched that they weren't riding it; if the grandfather rode it, they bitched that he was selfish for not letting his wife ride; if the wife rode it, they bitched that the man should be riding it because he was doing the hard work; if both rode it, they bitched about animal cruelty. Hearing the word 'bitch' (jiral) come out of Eunbyul's lips, he found it funny enough that his tension eased somewhat.
"You swear well, Eunbyul."
"...I’m being serious, General Manager."
"Right. Anyway..."
"Yes. Anyway, Senior, that broadcaster said this at the end. People who curse like that are everywhere, but the most important thing is..."
"..."
"When you walk down the road, the grandfather might ride the donkey, or the grandmother might ride it. If they don't want to walk, they can ride together for about 10 minutes? If the donkey looks tired, they can both walk. Then they can rest and have a drink. But what does that have to do with anything? The most important goal for those elders and the donkey is 'arriving home safely'."
"Hmm... That’s true."
"So that BJ said, the three of them arriving home safely. The moment that becomes visible, all the people who were cursing disappear."
"Oh~"
He understood what Eunbyul was saying. And Eunbyul nodded slightly and continued, "I thought there must be a reason why you failed, Senior."
"..."
"I saw a lot of people cursing you, too."
"Hmm. That stings."
"..."
Then Eunbyul said in a slightly stronger tone, "I think you were just... just tripped over a stone while you were on your way home with the donkey and the old couple."
"...?"
"There might be people who call you a fool for tripping, and there might be people who insist that stones have human rights and force you to apologize to the stone."
"...Pfft, it’s funny imagining it. Those people... that’s right. There are similar people."
Then Eunbyul lowered her tone again, speaking in a small voice, as if she were persuading and comforting him at the same time.
"I think that business—the one of just going home—will succeed. If succeeding means you arrive home, then I think it’s natural that you’d get cursed at and trip over stones in the process. The important thing is, you’re using those failures as a lesson and working seriously and competently now... That’s not flattery!"
"At this rate, I’ll have to make you an executive..."
"You fool... Anyway, as expected, Han Suhyun, the Senior I know... is a rare person who knows that getting home is what’s important. A person who endures such curses and stubbornly walks his own path... That’s what I thought."
He looked at Eunbyul blankly. "So, you’re saying you belong to the former of those two types of people?"
"Well, it just turned out that way."
"Didn't you say all that just to hear me say that?"
"...Be quiet."
Then Eunbyul looked away for a moment, looked at the sky with him, and said, "...But your ex-wife... she didn't seem like that kind of person."
"...Why?"
He asked out of curiosity. Truly. He wondered what she knew that made her think that.
"I think when good people meet, they date and marry without fighting."
"..."
"First of all, I know very well that you are a good person, Senior."
"..."
"But you’ve had a few times in the past where things weren't good with your lover."
He didn't know how she knew that, but since they had grown distant a few times, it was true.
"Then... since the premise that you are a good person holds, it means your ex-wife is not a good person."
"..."
"So that’s why you fought. If she’s not a good person... then naturally, when something like that happened, she would belong to the latter group and curse you... That’s what I predicted. That’s why I thought you would divorce her immediately when that incident happened."
It’s like you installed a CCTV in my house...