Sudden Wealth Is Scary
Having decided to try my hand at alchemy, I went around the general stores gathering tools and materials.
"Why are these tools so expensive?"
Just putting together a basic set cost me seven gold.
A mortar and pestle, a small pot, an alcohol lamp, spare alcohol, spare wicks, and even a wand for releasing mana. The other items weren't particularly expensive, really.
It was the mana tool — the wand — that cost so much. Even though it was just a toy that simply released mana, a mana tool was still a mana tool, and the price reflected that.
"Is this really the right way to go…?"
And since I couldn't get the herbs listed in the book's recipe, I bought other medicinal plants said to have healing properties. Once I'd purchased everything I needed, I returned to the inn.
Arriving there, I immediately unpacked and organized my purchases, then set about preparing for alchemy.
"Is this really possible?"
This was content from a book a thousand years old — an already obsolete technique, you could say. On top of that, I couldn't properly use mana. Could I really perform a combination with nothing but a mana-tool wand?
I lit the alcohol lamp with my trusty flint, set up a stand over it, and placed the small pot on top. The flame rising from the lamp gradually heated the vessel.
"First, a little water."
Then I finely chopped the healing herbs and added them. Now… I needed to stir while injecting mana, but since I couldn't handle mana myself, I decided to borrow the power of the wand.
"Stir while injecting mana until it glows?"
A mana-tool wand that supposedly let even people who couldn't use mana release it… Kids used them as toys, but because they drew on the faint mana within the body, I'd been warned that overusing one was dangerous. The shopkeeper had cautioned me about that when I bought it, so I needed to be careful.
"Until it glows… Well, somehow it'll work out."
I picked up the wand. When the mana tool activated, a faint light began to emerge from the tip along with mana. I immediately stuck the wand into the pot and stirred. For about ten minutes it was manageable, but as time went on I could feel the strength draining from my arms.
Stirring steadily for a long stretch was harder than I'd expected.
"Just keeping up the stirring is work in itself."
The mental fatigue was severe too — I couldn't even tell if the mana was flowing in properly.
"Th-this… I think I need to awaken to mana before I can do alchemy…"
I'd heard that once you could handle mana, it would accumulate in the body and the amount would increase. And nobles apparently had some special accumulation methods of their own…
Thinking about what my sister had said, once you could handle mana, you'd naturally come to know the accumulation techniques as well…
"Ugh."
Past the fifty-minute mark of using the wand, my mind grew hazy. Still, just as the book described, the contents of the pot grew thick and began to glow. There was clearly hope.
But my condition was terrible. It was definitely the result of using too much mana. Still, I held on. Just a little more — a little more stirring, and I'd be done.
As more time passed, the contents of the pot melted completely and began to shine with rainbow colors. It wasn't burning from lack of water — it was transforming.
Alchemy was clearly taking effect.
"I-I can't give up."
Through sheer stubbornness I held on for another ten minutes, and then the light from the pot intensified before vanishing all at once. That seemed to be the sign of completion written in the book. In a dazed state, I first extinguished the alcohol lamp and checked the contents of the pot. Inside was a green cream.
"Heh… heheh… D-did I succeed?"
Success… I'd succeeded. The alchemy book was real! Emotion welled up inside me.
That was as far as I could maintain consciousness. The satisfaction of success made me lose focus, and all the fatigue I'd been holding back crashed over me at once. I couldn't hold on.
When I opened my eyes, my whole body ached and my head hurt. Having collapsed on the floor in a strange position, that was only natural.
"M-more importantly — the finished product!"
The green cream was still in the pot. It really hadn't been a dream.
"I succeeded?!"
The problem was whether this thing would actually work. Inflicting a wound on myself just to test the ointment's effects felt a bit much…
After some deliberation, I decided to experiment on myself.
I pulled a small dagger from my bag and rested it against the broad part of my arm — a cold, metallic sensation. The eerie feeling made me a little scared. I'd been hurt plenty of times during my adventurer days. Still, deliberately cutting myself made my hand tremble. Just a light scratch…
I squeezed my eyes shut and drew the blade across my arm.
A sharp pain brought tears to my eyes for a moment.
"Ghk."
I hadn't cut deep, so there wasn't much blood. Even so, the wound stung terribly.
"Tsk, maybe I shouldn't have done that?"
I was going to get hurt adventuring anyway — I could have just used it then, right? Instant regret. I was staring blankly when the sensation of blood flowing startled me into examining the wound. It wasn't large, but leaving it untreated seemed dangerous.
I wiped away the blood, gently applied the ointment over it, and wrapped it with a bandage.
"I can check tomorrow, right?"
If the effects written in the book were real, the wound would heal in a day or two.
After checking the bandage, I cleaned up the tools I'd used and lay down on the bed.
I'd planned to return home in glory with the money I'd earned this time… but I'd spent way too much.
"Hah, can't be helped."
Between buying meals and paying for the inn, I only had about seventy gold left. I'd definitely meant to be careful with my spending…
Without realizing it, I'd gone on a spending spree. Especially the expensive cake — that was such a waste.
"Is it because my body changed?"
Why had cake, which I'd barely cared about as a man, looked so delicious…? Eating expensive cake every day and indulging in luxury had made the money disappear.
"Anyway, alchemy seems to be real…"
After a little while, the stinging in my arm eased. I hadn't checked the wound itself, but the effect seemed good. Could I make money with this? The ointments sold by apothecaries didn't work this well, so if I advertised the effectiveness, people would probably buy it.
"Even so, it's still worse than receiving healing magic once…"
At the Metis Church, you could receive healing magic at a quite reasonable price. And since the Metis Church was the main religious order of the kingdom I lived in, it was easy to find.
"Looking at the materials, I could turn a profit, but…"
The problem was that I'd fainted after combining the ointment just once. In other words, as someone who couldn't properly use mana, I couldn't mass-produce it.
"So my goal going forward is mana awakening, then…"
Something that had been impossible for six years. Could it be possible now?
But I had no desire to give up. I needed it to become a man again, and I couldn't forget the emotion of succeeding at alchemy for the first time. To do the alchemy I loved, I needed mana.
My head hurt and my stomach felt awful — I couldn't do anything more. For today, I'd just rest well.
After a good rest, the next day I set out to gather information on obtaining mana. First I went to a mana-tool shop and asked, but all I got was that they didn't know either.
Returning empty-handed from the mana-tool shop, I decided to look for books on mana at an old bookstore.
"This is hard, as expected."
Mana wasn't a special power. It existed in the air, in water, in living things — everywhere. What was special was the method of accumulating more of it in the body than you naturally possessed.
How exactly did mages accumulate mana? Did you need an awakening? Or was there something like the internal energy cultivation methods from martial arts novels?
Or maybe, like in fiction, you created circles in your heart?
"I have no idea."
Looking through the books, there was nothing about such techniques. It was probably a secret that never left the gates — closely guarded knowledge.
Or maybe they only selected talented people to teach.
When I closed the book and stood up, the old bookstore owner approached.
"Couldn't find what you were looking for today?"
"No — nothing about mana, as expected."
Having come here a few times, the proprietor recognized me and struck up conversation.
"Mana, is it…"
The proprietor studied me carefully, then came closer and took my hand. Startled, I was about to pull away but stopped.
"Hmm…"
A ticklish sensation traveled up my arm.
"Have you recently experienced mana depletion?"
"Pardon?"
"Have you collapsed from using a mana tool?"
"Ah — yes."
"Never do that again."
Why? I'd fainted briefly, but there hadn't been any other problems.
"There are fools who use mana tools recklessly, thinking they'll obtain mana that way. They believe that by using mana, they'll eventually gain it, so they push the mana in their bodies to the limit. Do you know what becomes of such people?"
There had been few mana tools in the village where I lived. So I'd never seen anyone experience mana depletion. Naturally, I had no idea.
"None of them lived out their natural lifespans. The reason people who can't handle mana can use mana tools is that they consume life force to do so."
"Life force…?"
"Yes. They convert a very faint amount of life force into mana. In small amounts, it doesn't affect daily life — rest and it recovers. But when used excessively, that's a different story."
I could guess what came next. If used excessively? If all the life force was used up?
"Fainting while using a mana tool is the body's way of making you rest because your life force is insufficient."
So the body forcibly shuts itself down for safety, to stop using any more life force?
"People who don't know this and force themselves to use mana tools to learn how to use mana end up having their limiter released."
"Li-limiter…?"
"The threshold of life force that can safely be converted to mana — they go beyond it. And they fall into a delusion."
"A delusion…"
They become able to use mana tools more and for longer without fainting. They delude themselves into thinking they have more mana in their bodies.
"They keep wringing out mana past the limit, and eventually when they've drawn out all their life force, that's the end."
A chill ran through me. Had what I did yesterday been that dangerous?
"The end…"
"Heh heh. Scary, isn't it?"
"Even so, I want to use mana."
With mana I could become stronger and do alchemy. And I was still young — I didn't want to give up just because I couldn't use mana.
"Heh heh. Is that so… Then do your best."
The proprietor's smile was quite unpleasant. I'd thought he might tell me some method, but he was just mocking me… Still, I'd learned good information.
Feeling tired and figuring there was nothing more to gain from the books, I decided to return to the inn.
As I was about to roughly open the door and leave, a voice came from behind.
"Come again."
Like hell I will!
On the way back to the inn, I felt like someone was following me.
"Just my imagination?"
Even glancing back slightly, there were many people walking around, so I couldn't tell if anyone was chasing me. Something about the back of my head itched…
I abandoned my plans to go elsewhere and headed straight for the inn. Even on the way there, I kept feeling eyes on me.
When I took a less-traveled path, the watching gaze disappeared, and I soon arrived at the inn.
"Whew. I need to be careful."
It only occurred to me now, but I was currently a woman. That meant I could become a target for crime.
No matter how good the public safety, criminals weren't zero, and among them there were occasionally crimes targeting women's bodies.
"I need to be careful."
On top of that, I was currently carrying a large sum of money. If word had spread somewhere that I'd made money, becoming a target would be only natural.
"Hah. From now on I'll need to carry my equipment every time I go out."
I'd never worried about this kind of thing when I was a man… Is this why there are so few female adventurers?
I sighed.
Back in my room, I looked at the mana-tool wand.
"What should I do with this…"
If I believed the old bookstore owner, it was a truly dangerous item. But I'd paid quite a bit for it, so throwing it away…
"Should I try just one more time?"
The bookstore owner had said it was dangerous, but he hadn't said you couldn't awaken to mana that way.
If absolutely no one had become able to use mana this way, he would have called it a futile effort rather than dangerous.
"It's just a guess, but…"
There was a tiny possibility.
"Let's make just one more."
I combined the ointment the same way as yesterday. Near the end, just like before, the world turned yellow and my head spun.
I endured it and made the ointment, but in the end I fainted again.
After fainting and waking up, I transferred the finished ointment into a small container.
"Hah… alchemy…"
Was it because I was doing something I loved? It was hard and my head hurt, but it was fun and enjoyable.