Soaking in Heaven
Soaking in the hot spring, I completely lost track of time.
It had felt scalding at first, but now the temperature was perfect. The gentle warmth melted the tension from my body while a cool breeze kept me from overheating.
This place was surely heaven.
“Ahh, this is nice.”
A deep sense of ease settled over me. They had said the water was rich with mana, and sure enough I could see it flowing before my eyes. The way that mana wrapped softly around my body felt wonderful. They claimed it was good for the skin, and I really did feel cleaner somehow.
“It really is lovely.”
Sister Mary was enjoying the spring just as freely. When she fully relaxed, though, her chest became even more pronounced. The fact that the sight stirred nothing remotely improper in me was a problem in its own right…
I was starting to worry that my masculinity had truly vanished for good.
“Are you enjoying yourselves?”
A man’s voice drifted over from the other side. The distance made it a little hard to place, but it was clearly Young Master Maximilian.
“Yes. Are you enjoying it as well, Young Master?”
“I am. It feels wonderful.”
A quiet laugh slipped out of me.
“I’m glad we came.”
“Then choosing this place was worthwhile.”
He sounded proud—after all, he had been the one to pick the spot.
“Yes, yes, it’s really wonderful.”
I was far too relaxed to dwell on serious worries. Right. Masculinity and all that could wait for later. Much later.
Someday I would become a man again…
And even if I never did, would that really be so terrible?
Couldn’t I just keep living like this?
Those pathetic thoughts quietly took root in my mind.
“Is there anywhere you’d like to go tomorrow?”
Somewhere I’d like to go…
“Not really. I don’t even know what’s here.”
“You can assume every sort of entertainment is available. There’s a theater, and even a casino.”
A tourist town popular with the wealthy, I supposed. So there were dens of pleasure as well…
“A casino, huh…”
What kinds of gambling existed in this world? My previous life’s memories were full of every variety of game, and people had raked in money hand over fist with them. Would it be the same here?
I thought I had whispered it too quietly for anyone else to hear, yet everyone reacted at once.
“Gambling bad.”
“Julian? Gambling is not allowed. No matter how much money you have, gambling is forbidden.”
Emma and Sister Mary fretted over me, while—
“Miss Julian? Curious about the casino? A small taste wouldn’t hurt.”
—the young master seized the chance to egg me on.
“Just a taste…”
“That’s right. Enjoying it lightly isn’t a bad thing.”
Even Priest Daniel, who had been quiet until now, chimed in.
“Some among the clergy treat it as a form of recreation. Certain games can be quite entertaining so long as no money is involved.”
Clear rules and definite winners and losers made them perfect for testing one’s competitive spirit, he explained. Of course they never wagered actual coin.
“Still, some people complained it was boring without stakes and started betting their days off instead.”
“That’s about you, isn’t it?”
Daniel’s laugh carried over the wall.
“Haha, you noticed? Thanks to that I ended up with more free days, which was nice.”
“And you used those free days to chase after the sisters, which made you rather infamous.”
Sister Mary’s finishing blow landed squarely on Priest Daniel. I couldn’t hear his reaction, but I could easily imagine him taking the hit dead-on.
“Ah, so that’s how it was?”
“Ahem! In any case, enjoying yourselves lightly shouldn’t be a problem.”
I decided not to get my hopes up.
We kept exchanging small talk across the wall, and time slipped by before we knew it.
The real problem was…
“I can’t bring myself to get out.”
Was it because my body had grown so thoroughly warm? The moment I tried to rise, the chill that touched my skin was unbearable. Before I could take a single step, my legs simply folded under me again.
I couldn’t leave the comforting heat of the spring.
Emma and Sister Mary clearly felt the same; they only nodded in silent agreement.
A winter hot-spring bath was delightful… yet it came with one enormous drawback.
I dunked my face under the water.
When I felt sufficiently heated through, I lifted my head.
“Spirit! We’re getting out on pure spirit!”
I surged to my feet and scrambled out of the bath before my body could cool. I made straight for the door—
“Aaaah!”
My soles were going to freeze solid! I lunged for the handle—and the doorknob was freezing too!!
I wrenched the door open with all my strength and dove inside.
“Aaaah!”
Once I was in, the cold wind lessened and I could finally catch my breath.
“Julian, now that you’re inside, dry yourself off first.”
“R-right.”
I suddenly remembered I was completely naked and hastily covered myself with the towel I was holding. Yes… I needed to be careful.
After we had thoroughly enjoyed the hot spring, we ate dinner and rested.
The evening meal provided by the inn was quite good. Salad, soup, meat, bread, and a couple of appetizers—everything was clean and well-seasoned.
Only…
“Young Master, Daniel—are you getting enough?”
The portions were a little generous for me and just right for Emma and Sister Mary, but for two men with healthy appetites they were nowhere near enough.
“Missing one meal won’t hurt.”
“We can always buy some bread outside.”
Right. The men would take care of themselves.
Back in our room I threw myself onto the bed without a second thought. The soak had loosened every muscle, yet the fatigue of travel still lingered even though we had ridden in a carriage.
“Good night…”
I closed my eyes first and drifted off.
In a darkened room, two men sat drinking.
The atmosphere between them was far from friendly. If anything, the blond man was directing an excessive amount of hostility at the red-haired one all by himself.
“I don’t think we’re the sort of people who sit around drinking together.”
Even faced with open antagonism, the red-haired man only smiled and raised his cup.
“True enough. We met under unpleasant circumstances, so I understand.”
“Then why did you call me?”
“Simply because of the Saintess.”
At the word “Saintess,” the blond man’s hostility sharpened further.
“Don’t tell me you’re still after her.”
The red-haired man calmly shook his head.
“Of course not. I’m not so foolish as to set my sights on the Saintess. That whole affair is an unpleasant memory for me, if anything.”
He said it, yet the blond man clearly didn’t believe a word.
“Then what is this about?”
“Well… I simply couldn’t stand watching any longer.”
Maximilian, the blond, failed to grasp what Daniel, the red-haired man, was getting at.
“You’re in love with the Saintess, aren’t you?”
“What?!”
Maximilian was thoroughly flustered. He had never imagined his feelings had been discovered, so the shock was only natural.
“Did you really think no one would notice? The only person who hasn’t caught on is the Saintess herself.”
Maximilian was left speechless.
“Even Miss Emma, who seems to care about nothing but herself, has figured it out.”
That revelation hit him hard enough that he couldn’t close his mouth.
“We had no desire to interfere in the Saintess’s personal affairs.”
“W-what are you trying to say?”
“Your relationship with her has been stuck in place for far too long, with no progress at all.”
“A-and why is that a problem?”
Daniel let out a long sigh and drained his cup.
“Because watching the two of you go nowhere is frustrating! Especially you! You’re the problem! The Saintess is so dense she still hasn’t realized her own feelings, so maybe she can’t help it—but you know exactly how you feel, so why won’t you move forward? Why won’t you tell her?!”
Maximilian’s breath caught in his throat.
He couldn’t deny it. He had told himself countless times that he would confess, that he would convey his feelings—yet he had never once managed it properly. He hadn’t even tried.
All he had done was slowly, carefully close the distance.
He knew how pathetic and shameful that was…
How unmanly.
And now the man sitting across from him had seen right through it.
That fact struck Maximilian like a fatal blow.
“So what exactly are you trying to tell me?”
“I’m pointing out where you’ve gone wrong.”
Maximilian clenched his teeth. Honestly, he didn’t want to hear it. Listening felt like admitting defeat to the man in front of him.
“Being kind to your companions—or rather, to women—is fine, but you’re so excessively kind that it becomes a problem.”
Maximilian couldn’t understand what was wrong with that. Treating ladies with courtesy was only natural for a noble and a knight. How could that be a flaw?
“Because you’re kind to everyone, the Saintess doesn’t feel that your kindness toward her is special. People develop affection for those who treat them kindly. But a woman wants the man she cares for to pay more attention to her than to anyone else, and to offer her his heart.”
He wasn’t so dense that he failed to grasp the point.
Maximilian understood at once. Because he was kind to everyone, Miss Julian never felt that his behavior toward her was unique.
“And that’s not all. You’ve never once expressed your feelings directly, so of course she hasn’t noticed.”
It followed from what had already been said. No matter how kindly he acted, she couldn’t sense anything special. Therefore he needed to put his feelings into words so she could feel that specialness.
If he had done so, even if he remained kind to everyone else, he could still have made his heart known to her—to Miss Julian.
But he hadn’t.
“Watching that pathetic display has been truly frustrating. Do you really think you can win the Saintess over like that?”
Daniel drank again out of sheer exasperation.
Maximilian pressed his lips together, then closed his eyes.
“You—no, the Church—has no intention of interfering in Miss Julian’s romantic life?”
“Of course not. Our Church believes in freedom of love and freedom of marriage. Especially when it concerns the Saintess. The feelings of the person herself matter most.”
Hearing that, Maximilian clenched his fist tightly.
“So you wouldn’t mind if she and I ended up together?”
It was a cowardly, almost underhanded question—essentially asking for a guarantee.
“Ha… If I’d known you were this pathetic a man, I should have driven you off long ago…”
Daniel turned his head and clicked his tongue.
“I…”
Maximilian thought hard. What should he do from now on?
He already knew the answer.
He would convey his feelings to her.
He would find the courage and confess.
“Well, if she turns you down, I’ll at least offer some consolation.”
“Guh…!”
At Daniel’s words, Maximilian’s mind instantly conjured the scene: he mustering his courage to confess, only for her—Julian—to reject him…
I’m sorry! I’ve never thought of you that way, Young Master.
If he ever heard those words, Maximilian was certain he would never be able to stand again.
And so he thought…
Just a little longer. He would put off the confession just a little longer…