Why Are You There?
The clock had already struck nine in the evening, a rather late hour. Jeong Sua and I had come to the small playground not far from my house. It was close enough that we might run into Kang Suho, who had stepped outside for some fresh air.
“Feeling a little better now?”
“Yes… Thank you for buying me the strawberry milk.”
On the way here, I’d stopped by the convenience store and picked up a carton of strawberry milk. She just wouldn’t stop crying. The moment I, who had been so cold to her, showed a bit of kindness, she finally stopped sobbing and began sucking on the straw with quiet little slurps.
I’d love to see that same face wrapped around my cock.
Even with the night breeze brushing against us, the aphrodisiac still had her head floating in a hazy fog.
“You always skip regular milk and go straight for strawberry, don’t you?”
“You knew that?”
“Of course I did. Your taste is still stuck in kindergarten, kid.”
“It’s delicious, so what can I do… Hmph…”
Jeong Sua’s faint, adorable little rebellion reached my ears.
Creak. Creak.
The rusty hinges of the swing groaned, grating on the ears, when the buzz of a phone vibration cut through the noise.
I thought it was mine and reached into my pocket, but—
“Ah… It’s mine.”
Jeong Sua pulled out her phone and answered the call.
“Hello?”
The familiar voice drifting faintly through the speaker made my fist clench hard. No matter how many times I heard it, Kang Suho’s voice always triggered that reaction.
“Mmm…”
Sua glanced at me. She seemed to be debating whether to tell the truth.
“I’m just out for a walk.”
“I just… wanted some fresh air…”
“Ah, no… Anyway, what’s up…?”
Was he curious what I was doing after she canceled their plans? Well, they had been childhood friends, after all. If she suddenly ditched their arrangement, it was only natural he’d worry.
They liked each other but couldn’t even confess. Like I’ve said a thousand times, if you keep dragging your feet like that, I’m going to steal everything from you. Every heroine you were supposed to have, every event that was meant for you. I’ll make you watch the girls you like standing at my side and drown in despair.
I sneered at Kang Suho inside my head and kept eavesdropping on their conversation.
“It’s really nothing… Don’t worry about it.”
“O-oppa? Why are you asking me about Ijin oppa?”
Exactly. Was he testing the waters because he was watching us? Jeong Sua looked around just like I did. There was no sign of Kang Suho anywhere.
So he was just suspicious because I hadn’t come home and was guessing she might be with me? He only ever shows sharp instincts at times like these. Does he get some kind of tingling sixth sense whenever he’s about to be netorare’d?
I could see weird text floating above people’s heads, so it wouldn’t be surprising if he had some ability like that too.
More like he’s avoiding you, not Sua. Since the two of them spend so much time together, he must have mistaken it for me avoiding him. Still, it felt good. It meant Jeong Sua had kept the fact that she was with me a secret from him.
“Exactly. He’s so damn stubborn and cold-hearted you can never tell what he’s thinking.”
Why are you looking at me while you say that, Sua? I deliberately avoided her gaze when she spoke loud enough for me to hear.
“…I don’t really know about Ijin oppa either.”
“Okay… Sorry I couldn’t help.”
“Mm…”
After ending the call, Jeong Sua let out a long sigh through her nose. Then she glared at me with resentment, so I stared back as if to say, What do you want me to do about it?
“You shouldn’t deliberately avoid him anymore. Suho’s worried about you.”
“Why the hell is he worried? The only person I’ve been avoiding is you.”
Jeong Sua’s lower lip poked out like a duck’s. Another wave of sulkiness seemed to be washing over her.
“Are you really going to keep avoiding him until the end?”
“Yeah. Seven years of one-sided love doesn’t fade that easily. Just treat me like I don’t exist from now on.”
“Then… why did you help me at that bar? You should’ve treated me like I didn’t exist too. You should’ve just left me there to…”
“Just left you there to what? You’d better watch your words right now.”
When I widened my eyes and glared at her, she instantly shrank back, looking dejected. Even she knew how irresponsible the words that would have followed were.
“…Even if something bad happened to me, you could’ve just left me… right…?”
Her voice grew smaller and smaller until it was barely audible at the end.
“You realize you’re saying something ridiculous, don’t you? Do you really think I want that?”
“…No…”
“Haa… You’re so irresponsible, stubbornly pig-headed, yet the second I get forceful you turn into a timid little mouse. And on top of all that, you’re way too kind. I still don’t know how I ended up falling for someone like you.”
“……”
She had been silent for a moment, but now her face flushed bright red. It sounded like a complaint, but it was practically a confession. Of course, I had said it knowing exactly what it would sound like.
“Let’s head home now. It’s getting really late. I’ll walk you back first.”
“You’re going to walk me home?!”
I deliberately repeated the exact same words Kang Suho had used. Why? Obviously, for my own satisfaction. Even though the words were identical, the fact that she accepted my offer gave me the delicious feeling that I had stolen Jeong Sua away from him.
She knew I had copied his line and hesitated, her expression conflicted.
“Why are you so surprised over something so small… If you don’t want me to, then forget it. Let’s just stay strangers and never see each other again.”
I waved my hand and turned around without a hint of regret.
Clank.
The metallic rattle of the swing chains rang out as Jeong Sua scrambled down from the swing in a hurry. Then she grabbed the back of my collar.
“You’ll walk me home?”
“……”
Jeong Sua didn’t answer. It seemed like she had grabbed me on impulse when I said I was leaving… but whatever the reason, it was clearly acceptance.
“Haa… Come on. Let’s get you home quickly. After I drop you off, I want to rest too.”
We started walking side by side. There had always been Kang Suho wedged between us whenever we walked together, but now that I deliberately kept some distance, Sua was the one who closed the gap. This was exactly why push-and-pull was so important.
“Achoo! Ugh… It’s cold…”
Jeong Sua suddenly sneezed, hunching her shoulders and shivering. The evening wind had grown chilly. I took off the cardigan I was wearing and draped it over her, even buttoning it up for her myself.
“Why are you so stupid, kid?”
“Hmph! You were the one treating me like I didn’t exist…”
“You got sulky over just that? What a narrow-minded little brat.”
Maybe my words struck a nerve, or maybe she just wanted an excuse to yell. Either way, Jeong Sua suddenly shouted.
“It’s all because of you!”
“Look at you using casual speech now.”
I flicked her forehead with a sharp thump, using my middle finger against my thumb. I didn’t hit her too hard, but she clutched her forehead and glared at me with a resentful expression.
“Oww… That hurts…”
“Then don’t try to act like we’re equals. You’ve been slipping into casual speech with me more and more lately. Am I your friend or something?”
“You’re being so petty over one little slip… Can’t I talk casually with you now?”
“No.”
“Why not?”
“Because if I let a brat like you speak casually, you’ll just keep climbing all over me. I hate that.”
“You said you like me… but you’re so stingy… Hmph…”
Stingy? Then you should’ve become my girlfriend. If you had, I wouldn’t have stopped at just letting you speak casually. The change from “Oppa” to “Honey” or “Darling” would happen in the blink of an eye.
We kept walking alone together like that until we eventually arrived in front of Jeong Sua’s house.
“Thanks for the cardigan, oppa.”
“Yeah.”
I took the cardigan back. It carried her scent. I’d never wash it. I’d keep it forever.
“……”
She looked reluctant to go inside. She probably knew that if we parted like this, I would deliberately start avoiding her again. The disappointment was written all over her face.
There was no need for long goodbyes here.
“I’m going.”
With those short, indifferent words, I turned around.
“O-oppa!”
Squeeze.
She grabbed me so I couldn’t leave. See? I knew it.
I didn’t even turn my head, speaking while still facing away. I didn’t want her to see the smirk tugging at my lips.
“What now?”
“This Saturday… ten in the morning… in front of Hapjeong Station… I’ll be waiting for you to go buy Suho’s birthday present together…”
“I’m not going.”
“Then I’ll wait until you come…”
“Do whatever you want. It’s up to you, kid.”
“You think I won’t? Just watch… If you don’t show up, I’ll starve to death right there on the spot! Hmph!”
Bang!
Jeong Sua let go of my wrist and dashed into the house. Only then did I turn around, staring after her with an incredulous expression.
“That girl just used casual speech again and ran off.”
I stood there staring at the front door for a moment before letting out a small chuckle, then retraced my steps back home.
Why were the two of them together?
Kang Suho had gone out to buy some snacks and happened to spot familiar faces at the nearby playground. His older brother by one year, Kang Ijin, and his childhood friend Jeong Sua.
Wondering if he had seen wrong, he hid and crept closer. It really was the two of them.
This was the first time he had ever seen them meeting alone like this. It made sense. Jeong Sua had always stuck by his side, and she was his friend. His brother had only ever treated her as his little brother’s friend.
When they played at home, the three of them would hang out together sometimes, but whenever they played outside, it was always just the two of them or with other classmates. His brother was never there.
Lately, however, the subtle distance between those two had seemed to shrink noticeably. They were making plans to meet alone. Sua had suddenly asked to see his brother’s graduation album. And now they were together alone this late at night.
Come to think of it, Sua had canceled their plans today, saying something suddenly came up.
I was the one who asked her to hang out first…
When he saw how sorry she looked for canceling, he couldn’t bring himself to say, “Still, let’s hang out with me instead.”
Because… Kang Suho had been in love with his childhood friend Jeong Sua ever since they were little.
He didn’t want to act stubborn and make her hate him.
But then…
“She canceled our plans to go meet my brother instead…”
An overwhelming sense of betrayal.
It was ugly to weigh who was better or worse, but obviously the one who was closer to Jeong Sua wasn’t his brother. It was him.
Yeah, there must be some reason.
On the day of the entrance ceremony, Sua had kept it a secret from everyone but him because she was buying him a birthday present. This time had to be the same.
It had to be…
Beep… Beep…
Kang Suho was calling Jeong Sua. Even while thinking how pathetic he was being, he couldn’t stop himself.
The girl sitting on the swing picked up.
“I’m just out for a walk.”
A walk? Could that even be called a walk? No matter how you looked at it, the two of them just hanging around on the playground looked nothing like a simple stroll. Besides, they always called each other every evening. Kang Suho knew that Sua didn’t go for walks at this hour.
Jeong Sua was telling an obvious lie.
Why? For what reason?
Yeah, there had to be a reason for the lie. Even if they were childhood friends, he had no right to know every single thing she didn’t want to tell him.
“R-really? By the way… do you happen to know where my brother is?”
Even so, he ended up asking the question that exposed his sticky jealousy.
Startled by the sudden question about his brother, Jeong Sua looked around. Luckily, because he had quickly hidden behind the wall, she didn’t notice him.
The sight of himself acting like a pathetic, sneaky thief was shocking, but he prayed desperately that this at least was not a lie. He wanted her to say that she had run into his brother by chance while taking a walk and was just chatting with him for a bit.
But instead—
The person standing right next to her was his brother, yet she said she didn’t know. He wanted to scream it at her, but Kang Suho held it in and ended the call.
How long had he been standing there in a daze, watching the scene for about five minutes?
The moment he saw his brother walking Jeong Sua all the way home, the thought that he didn’t want to do anything anymore flooded his mind. Kang Suho turned around and went back to the house.