If You Don't Want Me Stolen by Another Bitch, Then Suck Like Your Life Depends On It♡
"Hey, Choi Yura. When's that male friend of yours getting here?"
"Ugh, just wait a little longer. It's barely been ten minutes since I called, you bitch."
"Hmm..."
Hyejeong crunched on the puffed rice snacks that had come out as a basic side dish, glancing around the bar with a bored expression. She clearly wasn't impressed. Her sharp gaze landed on Choi Yura again.
"But seriously, Yura. Yura, Yuraaa? Why the hell did we come here? There are so many better places."
"Better places? This is the hottest spot in the area right now."
At Yura's confident declaration, both friends sitting across from her grimaced in unison.
"Oh my god... Yura, are you for real right now? Okay, fine, it is a hot spot. Everyone knows that. The food's good and the vibe's nice, we get it."
"Then what's the problem?"
"What's the problem? There are no dicks here! No fucking dicks!"
The bold, blunt statement made Yura's eyes widen. She quickly glanced around, worried someone at the neighboring tables might have heard. And sure enough, she spotted several women at other tables shooting looks of complete agreement toward Hyejeong.
When she turned back with an exasperated sigh, Sujin—the one sitting beside Hyejeong—nodded firmly in support.
"Agreed. If we were just gonna drink by ourselves, we could've ordered spicy rice cakes at your place, Yura. Why the hell did we bother putting on makeup, popping in contacts, and coming out? To refresh our eyes by looking at hot guys, obviously?"
"Sujin's spitting straight facts today. So let me ask you again, Yura, Yuraaa. What is this place? Some twenty-first century Amazon tribe? How is there not a single dick in this entire bar? I'm about to suffocate from all the pussy energy in here."
Pffft— Snickers and muffled laughter started leaking out from the surrounding tables. Sujin nodded again.
"Agreed. The yin energy is flooding the floor. Feels like we're gonna drown in it. Should've just gone to the club instead?"
At that, Hyejeong—who had been attacking Yura—suddenly whipped her head toward Sujin.
"Wait, no, Sujin. That's where you're wrong. If we're going to a club, you need to take off those ugly-ass glasses first and actually do your makeup properly. You're all talk."
"What the hell is this crazy bitch saying? Even looking like this, I'd get way more approaches than you. You're the only one who doesn't realize how chaotic your features are."
The two friends were just about to launch into their usual mutual destruction when Yura cut in.
"Guys, stop whining already. That's why I called my male friend, okay?"
The topic resurfaced. The bickering pair instantly united, eyes sparkling with interest. Of course, they only cared about one thing.
"But is your male friend hot? How tall? What about his body?"
"Um, well..."
Yura honestly couldn't remember clearly. That day at the convenience store when he'd confessed while holding chocolate milk, she'd been so drunk she was about to black out. Still, her feminine instincts had been screaming at her.
He had that slow-but-smooth vibe... and something like an unscratched lottery ticket...
Otherwise she wouldn't have taken his number. But didn't he confess in Japanese or something?
He was definitely a slow-but-smooth type. But the slight otaku impression lingered too, so she couldn't be completely sure.
When Yura hesitated, disappointment washed over her friends' faces.
"Forget it, forget it. It's always the same with your male friends, Yura. Why did I even get my hopes up?"
"Agreed. Dried anchovy, broth pig, zero points. Those are the only three categories in Choi Yura's male friend list."
"Anyway, if your friend isn't hot, I'm leaving immediately. Sujin and I will go hunting at a different bar. If you're horny enough, you can tag along."
Hyejeong had just delivered her ultimatum and was lifting her cocktail to her lips when—
Ding-ling—
The wind chime at the entrance rang out cheerfully. It was the same ordinary sound they'd heard dozens of times since arriving—customers coming and going. But this time was different.
"...?"
The moment the door opened, the noisy chatter that had filled the bar began to fade like the tide pulling back. As if someone had forcibly turned down the volume dial on the entire place.
What... what's going on?
The atmosphere had flipped one hundred and eighty degrees. Yura turned toward the entrance as if possessed.
And there he was.
"...Eh?"
The man standing in the doorway was utterly alien to the space. Pastel-toned, cutesy interior. The sweet smell of fruit soju. The heavy scent of women's perfume and makeup. A space utterly saturated with thick yin energy.
Into that space, a single apex predator male had suddenly intruded. And not just any male—one that radiated such dense, raw, and above all, overwhelmingly powerful yang energy that it swept away the bar's suffocating feminine atmosphere in a single breath.
Blue jeans and a white muscle-fit t-shirt. A simple, unadorned outfit. Yet precisely because of that, everything was laid bare.
The savage curves of his swollen pectorals beneath the shirt. Shoulders so broad they seemed to fill the narrow doorway. Thick veins writhing across his forearms like dozens of angry earthworms. His makeup wasn't excessive, but it was perfectly executed—not a single misstep. Hair styled with exact precision. Clean, sharp features.
Every element... existed in perfect harmony and proportion, each radiating its own powerful presence.
But none of those external details really mattered.
No. They were trivial.
What dominated everything was the man's aura. With each step he took into the bar, the surrounding air shifted violently. Crackle—crackle—! It was as if he were spraying pure male pheromones with every movement. He was captivating every female in the vicinity in real time.
Gulp.
The sound of dry swallowing came from somewhere. Every woman in the bar was staring up at him as if enchanted. Unconsciously crossing their legs, tucking hair behind their ears to expose their necks. And among them were plenty of blatantly hungry gazes tracing his solid thighs and lower body.
"Dude... what the fuck. Who is that?"
Sujin muttered blankly, eyes wide behind her glasses.
"Hey, Choi Yura... is that your male friend?"
"Uh, yeah... I think so..."
At Yura's uncertain reply, Hyejeong added in disbelief, "What the—? Is he a model? An influencer?"
"I'm not sure..."
In truth, Yura was just as dazed. She'd thought he was pretty handsome when she'd seen him at the convenience store a few days ago. But this was on another level entirely. If he'd given off a faint scent of desperation back then, now his entire demeanor overflowed with the relaxed confidence of a predator sizing up its prey.
And every woman here was willingly offering herself up as that prey.
Suddenly, Yura felt a sharp, electric tingle♡ deep in her lower belly.
That man... that overwhelmingly dominant male... had come out here for her? The same man who had confessed to her?
Yura felt the eyes of the women around her. Envy and jealousy over whose boyfriend he might be. Sticky gazes mixed with raw desire. Those stares stimulated her endlessly.
It was clear every woman in the bar wanted him. But where was he headed?
"We're over here! Oppa—! Over heeeere~!"
As if to show off to all the other women, Yura shot to her feet and waved her hand, her voice ringing with overwhelming superiority and triumph.
"Puhahaha! Oh my god, Oppa, you're too funny!"
Every single casual remark I made sent our table into absolute chaos.
"Exercise? Hmm. I mostly just do breathing exercises these days."
It was the kind of lame answer that would've killed the mood back in my days as a loser. But now—
"Kyaaaaah—! He said breathing exercises lolololol! This oppa's insane! lololol!"
"You're actually hilarious! Oppa, you're so fun~!"
No matter what I said, no matter how ridiculous, I only got positive reactions. I could talk about what I ate for lunch yesterday, the anime I'd recently watched, even the time I fell while playing foot volleyball in the military—they'd lose their minds laughing.
And they weren't just giggling. They were roaring with laughter like generals in the middle of a battlefield—Choi Yura and her friends. Was this what it was like?
Wait a second. Then what the hell had all those guides I'd read been about? 'How to be popular,' 'Conversation techniques to win favor on a first meeting'—what was the point of any of it?
I didn't need any of that. So that's how it is~
There was no such thing as special "alpha male speech." If an alpha male said it, it automatically became alpha male speech.
At that moment, Sujin—the one with glasses—stood up and casually slid into the seat right beside me. Ignoring Yura's suddenly sharp glare, she started fiddling with my phone.
"Oppa~ You've got a Demon Slayer phone case? Did you watch it too? Zenitsu's my favorite!"
Oh, really?
"Thunder Breathing... First Form!"
I dramatically demonstrated a chopstick iaido strike, and Sujin clapped, bursting into laughter.
"Wow, not many popular guys watch Demon Slayer. It's seriously fun, right?"
"The animation and action direction are solid, I'll give you that. But honestly, it's not a masterpiece. More like a well-made commercial piece. I don't really get why it's so hyped. It just follows familiar shonen tropes, the world-building is shallow, the narrative lacks depth, and the characters are one-dimensional. Especially after Rui dies, the power balance—"
...Ah. Mistake. I'd gone way too deep out of habit.
Normally, saying something like that would turn me into a ghost. But instead—
"Wow, you're handsome and you have strong opinions about your hobbies. That's so cool. Do you watch anime a lot? I do too! Can you recommend some? Or actually... want to watch something together next time?"
Even my socially disastrous answer had successfully earned Sujin's favor. And once I had that confirmation?
It was just nonstop nonsense and nonstop laughter. As time passed, we all got progressively drunker. Once we reached a nice buzz, the physical advances from Yura and Sujin sitting on either side of me grew increasingly bold.
They openly rubbed their breasts against my arms, grabbed my hands and placed them deliberately on their thighs. The soft, full sensation filling my palms. The smell of alcohol on their breath and the sweet, feminine scent drifting from both sides.
Ah. So this was what it felt like to be surrounded by beautiful women.
At some point, I didn't even need to lead the conversation anymore. I could just sit there, and they would perform for me, beg for my attention, and desperately try to please me.
The gazes of females intoxicated by the pheromones of my Alpha Aura. That alone was enough to make me feel drunk without needing any alcohol.
Just as the atmosphere was reaching its peak—
Tap. Tap.
"Excuse me."
Someone tapped me on the shoulder from behind. When I turned, I saw the woman who'd been stealing glances at me from the next table. She wore a deeply plunging halter dress and heavy smoky makeup. At first glance, she gave off the vibe of an extremely assertive older sister type.
Completely ignoring Yura and Sujin glued to my sides, she stared straight into my eyes.
"Do you... have a girlfriend?"
A total straight ball. For a moment, silence fell over our table. Yura, Hyejeong, and Sujin's gazes all locked onto my lips at once.
I thought for a second. Should I lie? No, there was no need. After today, I'd fully awakened to the fact that I was an alpha male. Making excuses with lies was something only beta males did.
Yura was staring at me with desperate eyes, clearly wanting to say something. I deliberately looked away from her gaze.
"No. I don't have a girlfriend."
"Oh... really?"
The woman's eyes sparkled. She took another step closer, the corner of her mouth curling up. Her swaying chest was impressive—at least Kim Minji level, maybe even beyond.
"Then can I join you?"
At that moment, it felt like an overstretched rubber band snapping in front of me.
"Excuse me, sis. Are you blind?"
Hyejeong couldn't hold back any longer. Her voice was sharp with thorns. Only then did I fully realize what was happening.
Of course. Logically speaking, approaching a man when three women were already sitting with him wasn't simple flirting or hunting. It was a silent taunt: 'You girls aren't even competition anyway.' A provocation. A declaration of war.
"Can't you see this oppa is with us? And that we're having a good time?"
Hyejeong glared, but the woman in the halter dress didn't even flinch. She simply looked Hyejeong up and down and smiled faintly.
"Are you his girlfriend?"
"N-no... that's not what I meant..."
"Then I can make a move, right? He's not taken."
When Hyejeong was left speechless, Sujin jumped in.
"Wow, just listen to this unnie. We're not dating, but... this oppa is in the talking stage with our Yura? Don't you have any manners?"
"Talking stage? Is that true, oppa?"
The woman in the halter dress gave me a coy smile. In an instant, the table had turned into a battlefield for a vicious catfight. Hyejeong and Sujin looked ready to grab her by the hair at any second. Yura's face was flushing red and pale by turns from pure frustration.
And I...
Not bad.
The situation of women fighting over me was one of my old, useless fantasies. It was even a little thrilling. But if I stayed out of it any longer, a real brawl might break out.
I slowly rose from my seat.
"Alright, everyone, that's enough."
Between the women's high, sharp, piercing voices, my low, heavy, majestic male voice cut through like a blade. At my single command, the snarling women all shut their mouths at once.
I looked at the woman in the halter dress. That bold gaze. The desire openly revealing that she wanted me. I didn't dislike it. In fact, it turned me on. After all, I'd never received such an aggressive approach in my life.
"Joining us would be a bit difficult, as you can see. I'm with my group."
At my polite rejection, Yura and her friends' expressions brightened. The woman in the halter dress, on the other hand, frowned slightly. But I didn't stop there.
With a deliberately regretful smile, I held out my phone.
"Instead, exchanging numbers should be fine. You worked up a lot of courage to come over, right? I know exactly how that feels."
"...Yes?"
"...What?"
Reactions burst out simultaneously from the woman and from Yura's group—one of delight, one of shock. I snatched the phone from the dazed woman's hand, entered my number, called it, and saved the contact.
Yeah. This was real male behavior.
"I already have plans with these friends today. Contact me later when you have time. We can meet up separately then."
"Ah... yes! Yes! I'll definitely call you, oppa."
The woman carefully accepted her phone and returned to her own table.
A new silence fell. But the quality of the air was subtly different from before. The women sitting on either side of me—especially Choi Yura—had eyes burning with anxiety, jealousy, and fierce possessiveness.
It was exactly the reaction I'd expected. Unease. Restlessness. And competitive spirit. This kind of moderate tension was the perfect catalyst for a relationship.
So, if you don't want a man like me to be taken by other women...
You'd better suck me off like your life depends on it, right?