Chapter 106
Chapter 106
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Translator: MadScientist
Chapter: 106
Chapter Title: The Saint's Inner Thoughts Are Heard
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In truth, Victoria had anticipated the situation might turn out this way to some extent.
The Astal Caisaros she knew was a man who showed a side more cruel than anyone else when dealing with demons or monsters.
For Astal, who suffered from the trauma of his hometown burning and his parents being killed, there were many times he had been rough to the point of not holding back against demons or monsters.
Because of that, they had even argued or fought before.
Moreover, he was a person of such strong principle that he could deny his own affection for the sake of a greater cause, even rejecting the confession of someone he loved.
"...I had guessed that the Astal-nim I love possessed this kind of personality, but facing it directly is a first."
Victoria's voice was low as she clenched the hand holding her hammer tightly. It wasn't because she liked that kind of personality; she had fallen for the humane and kind side Astal showed.
"Victoria. Why did you suddenly draw your hammer? Are you planning to break my limbs with that weapon? I've thought this since last time, but I think your rather extreme personality is a problem..."
The same voice, but a different tone.
Looking at Astal, who took a step closer to her, she felt a pain as if sharp glass had pierced her heart.
"...Shut that abominable mouth at once. Even if you are another personality of Astal-nim, if you will not cooperate with us, we will simply subdue you."
Despite her words, spoken with the sense of alienation as if the person she loved had vanished somewhere, Victoria hesitated in her actions.
"I'm the one who always risked my life for you, Victoria. Isn't this kind of treatment too much? If it weren't for that guy's pathetic personality, we might have gotten together long ago, you know?"
"...Shut up. Aren't you Astal too? It's disgusting to speak of yourself as if you're someone else like that."
As Astal chuckled and moved his finger as if to brush her chin, she spat out the words with clear displeasure.
If Astal had actually approached her like this, it might have felt refreshing, but no matter how she thought about it, the man before her now felt utterly alien.
"Besides, you've acted differently from your inner thoughts like this many times too, haven't you? Have you forgotten the times you slandered or badmouthed me to hide your feelings for me?"
"Urgh, that is true, but..."
Unable to refute Astal's words, Victoria gritted her teeth. There had been many times she had spoken and acted in a way that could be seen as a completely different person.
Just a few months ago, Victoria had called Astal a chain-smoking drunkard and said things to belittle him.
"Do you think you can escape this situation with such excuses?! Immediately relinquish control of the body to the original Astal-nim and help supplement the Idea..."
"Ah, seriously, you're so damn noisy. Can't you just shut up and watch? I might be able to fight better than that guy who's obsessed with saving others, you know?"
Astal grimaced at Victoria's threat and instantly grabbed her wrist, subduing her to prevent resistance.
"......!!!"
The distance was so close they could clearly see the shape and color of each other's eyes.
Astal stopped his face at a distance where their lips might touch if either moved even slightly, as if he were about to kiss Victoria.
"Looks like a kiss isn't possible. Seems I haven't completely seized control..."
He blinked for a moment, then clicked his tongue in disappointment and moved away from Victoria.
Cold sweat dripped from Astal's left hand, which had begun to tremble.
It seemed the original personality was using all its might to prevent any harm from coming to Victoria.
"You, what on earth were you trying to do just now...?!"
"Trying to seal your mouth with a kiss? Wouldn't you like that more? After all, we're in a relationship."
"What, what kind of... such a preposterous lie...!!"
Seeing Astal attempt to kiss her in front of all their companions, Victoria's face flushed red and she couldn't properly form her words.
The Astal Caisaros she knew, the mage, was awkward and somewhat timid around women, always needing her to provoke or seduce him to get him to respond.
"...So you don't like it? Even if the real Astal did it?"
Now, Astal was grinning slyly as if teasing Victoria, continuing to unsettle her heart.
He gently released the grip on her wrist and now interlocked his fingers with hers, showing meticulousness in preventing her escape.
Because of this, seeing Astal with his hair and robe colors inverted to red, Victoria thought he resembled a human possessed by a demon.
It was the kind of change where even an ordinary, innocent person could commit murder or terrible crimes in an instant.
"Of course I would like that. But right now..."
"I'm Astal too, you know? Even if my personality and tone are very different from his right now."
"That's a lie. You are merely a fragment of the sadistic personality that Astal-nim possesses."
Therefore, Victoria judged that as a Saint, she must drive out the personality currently dominating Astal's body and restore him to his original form.
"No. At least when I was young, I had this kind of personality. I was the type to hurt people I didn't like with magic."
However, the statement that came from Astal's mouth was unexpectedly shocking.
"...When my parents and the people of my hometown hadn't been killed by the Demon King's army, I thought I was a genius because I could use magic, so I lived recklessly. You know the type, right? The kind of kid among peers who lives thinking they're great."
Astal let out a deep sigh and made a sad expression toward Victoria, as if asking her to listen to his story.
Seeing the drooping corners of his mouth and slumped shoulders, like a puppy soaked in the rain, Victoria even felt a little sorry for him.
In fact, this was also a story she had occasionally heard from the original Astal. When he was young, he mistakenly thought he was a genius, so even when he sensed the Demon King's army's invasion, he didn't ask others for help.
"So that's why your guilt was so severe? And why you mistakenly assumed the villagers or your parents would resent you?"
Victoria began to see Astal's usual solemn side overlapping, so she quietly lowered the hammer she was holding to her side and started to listen intently to his words.
"Yeah. Back then, I thought I was a peerless genius, that I had special eyes that could see magical power unlike others, so I complacently missed the changes that were happening."
Noticing Victoria had lowered her guard a little, Astal showed a bitter smile and continued his story of the past.
"If I hadn't thought like that, maybe I could have noticed the anomaly when people suddenly started getting injured by monsters around the village and stopped it."
The red-haired Astal's eyes even glistened slightly with tears.
From his mouth came assumptions: what if he had known the monsters were swarming around the village in advance and issued an evacuation order? What if he had built a defensive wall around the entire village and requested rescue from others? He was talking about the trauma he had almost failed to overcome.
"...The result was obvious. Because of me alone, countless people lost their lives, and ultimately, the guilt from that time changed my entire personality to become passive."
At Astal's remarks, the other companions also held their breath and listened carefully to his words.
Since Astal, aside from Victoria, rarely talked about his past, they had been curious why he was so obsessed with saving people.
"So, is that your reason for trying to relive your long-gone adolescence now? Didn't we overcome that past together?"
"Even if you overcome it, scars remain. A hole doesn't disappear from where a nail was pulled out. You also had a sad past and tried to hide your inner thoughts with slander and badmouthing..."
"...Such holes can simply be filled. The love you have given me is greater than any wound I have suffered."
Breaking that silence, Victoria smiled, raising the corner of her mouth toward the red-haired Astal.
It wasn't only Astal who had resolved trauma and grown through loving someone.
Victoria too, through meeting him, learned to express her feelings honestly and, by confronting her own heart, became aware of the emotion called love.
"And haven't I told you before? That wasn't your fault. How could a hero who saved people become a murderer? No matter how you think about it, it's the Demon King and his underlings who are evil."
"......Yeah."
"Truly, you are a man with no learning ability. Seeing that you need to be told again like this to understand."
Victoria repeated the words that had made Astal fall for her, gently stroking his hair.
"Besides, what is with this red hair and robe? Someone might mistake you for the Red Tower Master instead of a mage of the Blue Magic Tower. It would be best to revert it immediately."
"Perhaps this is because my grandfather was from the Red Magic Tower... I never met him directly, but I heard many stories through my mother, so maybe that's why."
The red-haired Astal showed signs of calming down only after Victoria gently admonished him with words.
It was another side of Astal, who had an unexpectedly spoiled aspect, like a child who hadn't played properly.
"...Wait, but how do I revert this?"
Then, something no one had anticipated happened.
The red-haired Astal tightly closed his eyes, grimaced, or took a few rough breaths, but there was no effect.
To anyone watching, it was clear he hadn't returned to his original personality, as the color of his hair and robe remained red, unchanged.
"I don't know how to revert it either. With druids, the transformation just wears off over time or when they're in mortal danger... Besides, they can return to human form at will."
"What the hell? You should have told me that earlier!"
"I'm sorry. I didn't anticipate it would succeed on the first try either."
Among them, Taryon, who had noticed the oddity first, apologized to Astal.