Chapter 67
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Translator: 8uhl
Chapter: 67
Chapter Title: What the Hell is Qi Deviation?
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The meeting that had dragged on for several days finally came to an end.
That meant it was time for us to head back to Mount Hua.
While staying at Shaolin, I'd learned that this was the world of [Sword God Returns] and that the group trying to kidnap me was the Demonic Cult. Not a bad haul.
Uigang chuckled heartily as he ruffled my hair with his rough hand while I packed my things.
"Still, having kids your age around must've kept you from getting bored, right?"
"After all the trouble I caused, when would I have had time to be bored?"
I gave an awkward laugh instead of a reply to the Sect Leader's sharp remark. He still hasn't forgotten, huh. Looks like I'm stuck with cleaning duty when we get back.
Uihyeon gently patted my head as he effortlessly lifted the neatly bundled pile of my luggage.
"You got everything? Nothing left behind?"
"Yup."
"Did you make a lot of friends with the other kids while you were at Shaolin? You said goodbye to them, right?"
I'd made exactly one. Well, technically, I'd upgraded Peng Ha-ran to friend status.
But knowing my master's idea of "a lot" differed from mine, I decided to keep the exact number—a grand total of one—to myself and just nodded.
Clutching Uihyeon's hand tightly, we left the guest reception hall and arrived at the Heavenly Kings Hall, Shaolin's main gate.
The area was swarming with people heading out.
Even in the crowd, Maengri—who always stood out—was nowhere to be seen today.
Peng Ha-ran had left Shaolin early because her condition had worsened dramatically. We'd already said our goodbyes the day before, so I didn't feel too bad about it.
Instead, my eyes met Namgung Seheon's as he looked around. Uihyeon, noticing where I was looking, spotted the approaching Namgung Seheon and asked warmly,
"Looks like you didn't get to say goodbye yesterday. You won't see your friend for a while—want to go say hi?"
"He's not my friend."
Namgung Seheon, who had been running over, screeched to a halt upon hearing that, his eyes going wide.
"What? Why? Aren't we friends?"
I scratched my cheek at his question, shock dripping from every word.
Well, you did hand me a bitter defeat, so I doubled the criteria for you.
So it takes twenty meetings to count as friends...
But as a reward for keeping quiet and honoring our deal this time, I'd decided to subtract from the remaining count.
"Next time we meet, I'll count you as one."
He ground his teeth and shot back with a pissed-off grin, like he was mocking me.
"Yeah, thanks a bunch."
He dangled the hair tie from his wrist right in front of my eyes, as if to say "come and get it," and smirked.
"So, your hair tie's mine as a friendship gift next time we meet?"
The moment I reached out, he bolted toward the mountain gate like a rabbit. I yelled after his retreating back.
"Hey, give me back my hair tieeee!"
That jerk—didn't you say you'd give it back if I came to the Namgung Family? Why's he changing his tune? Does he even plan to return it?
* * *
What welcomed me back to Mount Hua was,
"Senior brother, did you bring souvenirs? Souvenirs!"
"What the hell kind of souvenir is this?"
"Come on, you went all the way to Shaolin—how does it make sense not to bring anything back?"
"Yeah! You should've at least grabbed some Dongbonghyeon specialties!"
"Down with him! Down with him!"
My fellow disciples, who skipped greetings and went straight for souvenirs the moment they saw me,
And,
"Damn, when am I ever gonna finish cleaning all this...? Oh Primordial Heavenly Lord, isn't this basically the same as saying 'drop dead from cleaning'?"
A mountain of cleaning.
And on top of that...
"Training and punishment can't be flipped. Do your punishment cleaning after training."
"Uwaaah! Just throw me in the Reflection Cave! Send me to the Reflection Cave, please!"
It was to the point where getting locked in the Reflection Cave for a few days cleanly seemed preferable!
Training and cleaning side by side? I'm not some protagonist from a wuxia novel who trains by doing chores and scrubbing floors.
"What a mess..."
I plopped down on the floor of the Ancestral Hall, scrubbing Elder Mujin's memorial tablet vigorously, and muttered in lament.
Biyeong clicked her tongue as she wiped another freshly cleaned tablet with deft hands and placed it back in position beside me.
"What the heck did you do to get stuck cleaning the Ancestral Hall, the main hall of the Lotus Pavilion, and even the Sect Leader's office?"
"Yeah, nothing much—just dropped a Buddha statue in Shaolin."
"I'm gonna lose my mind."
Biyeong pressed her forehead, looking dizzy at my nonchalant reply.
The main hall of the Lotus Pavilion and the Sect Leader's office had eyes on them, so I'd cleaned those alone, but the more remote Ancestral Hall got voluntary help from my loyal fellow disciples.
All I'd done was one day of cleaning before wailing in the dojo about how I was gonna die and rolling around on the floor.
Looks like the Selection Hell training had really helped my brothers out.
Bihwan handed me a tablet, took the one I'd finished cleaning from Elder Mujin, and placed it back on the altar as he asked,
"Isn't that level supposed to land you in Shaolin's Reflection Cave instead of punishment cleaning here at Mount Hua?"
"The supreme leader of the Righteous Faction and foremost of the Nine Great Sects, our mighty thousand-year Shaolin, isn't that petty."
"You've become a full Shaolin fanboy, big senior brother."
Bihwan snickered and ruffled my hair lightly. Huh, pulling rank reversal in such a fresh way.
As I cracked my knuckles to remind him of the hierarchy, Bihun's grumbling came from behind.
"Ugh, I'm seriously gonna get Qi Deviation. Why are there so damn many tablets?"
That pissed me off even more than the insubordination, so I whipped around and bellowed at the new target.
"Shut it! You talk about Qi Deviation like you've experienced it?"
You're yapping about Qi Deviation without even getting close to the early stages? Is Qi Deviation a joke?
"Then have you ever gotten Qi Deviation, senior brother?"
I snorted at Bihun's snarky question.
"Kid, if I'd gone into Qi Deviation, big senior brother right now would've been Bihwan, not me. Surviving Qi Deviation intact is a goddamn miracle."
Perfect, natural. I'd actually messed up once and caught myself with an "oh shit" moment.
"No, isn't complaining about all these tablets the real thing to get mad about? That's straight-up欺師滅祖!"
"You're good at twisting words. How's saying there are too many tablets 欺師滅祖?"
It literally means deceiving the master and extinguishing the ancestors, so Bihun treating the tablets like a nuisance was indeed that.
"You punk, treat the tablets like the ancestors! You want our tablets treated like a hassle by our descendants later?"
Biwon smacked the back of Bihun's head mercilessly for his unfilial remark. Bihun rubbed the spot, scowling, and grumbled.
"Tch, what's so great about wooden slabs with names carved on them... Ow!"
Thwack. Right on cue, a tablet came crashing down from above, smacking Bihun squarely on the crown of his head before clattering to the floor.
In a spot with not a whisper of wind, the tablet had fallen all on its own. My fellow disciples' faces went pale as they stared at it.
"I-It was probably just a coincidence...? Haha..."
"That's definitely the ancestors getting pissed at senior brother Bihun's 欺師滅祖..."
Uwaaah! Led by Bihun, they screamed and bolted out of the Ancestral Hall one after another. I stared blankly at the backs of those damn cowards before resuming cleaning the tablets.
The living sect elders scared them more than the ascended ancestors who might chew them out for sloppy cleaning.
Left in the Ancestral Hall were just me, Biyeong, and Bihwan.
"Jeez, as if ghosts exist in this world."
"Yeah, tell me about it, little sister. How are they so damn scared?"
Bihwan chuckled and nodded in agreement at Biyeong's mockery.
But even Bihwan had peeled away from the altar he'd been leaning on and was keeping his distance. You look scared as hell too.
I'd cleaned about three-quarters of the tablets.
Holding a tablet in one hand and the cloth in the other, I flopped straight onto the Ancestral Hall floor and muttered,
"...Man, I feel Qi Deviation coming on."
"Didn't you just say that like you'd experienced it?"
Biyeong squatted in front of me and flicked my nose. I just grinned instead of answering.
I'd gone right up to the brink of Qi Deviation, so I've earned the right to say it.
I lay there staring at the Ancestral Hall ceiling, then suddenly surged up in a burst of anger, fuming.
"If I'd beaten that Namgung Seheon punk, I wouldn't be getting this punishment!"
Pretty sure the Sect Leader was inclined to let it slide if I'd claimed victory.
Bihwan, who'd witnessed my crushing defeat last time up close, asked cautiously,
"You lost again?"
"Nah, it was a draw this time. Didn't win, but didn't lose either."
My sparring record so far: 0 wins, 1 draw, 1 loss. I'd bragged to Uiseong that I'd definitely win this time, but a tie? No face left.
If not for that first move of his Imperial Sword Form, it would've been my win, damn it.
Even after some time, Namgung Seheon's sword technique was vivid in my mind. I mentally overlaid it, planning how to counter next spar—hypotheses and analysis.
Nah, this isn't enough. Gotta pick up a sword and swing it myself...
I snapped to as the tablet slipped from my hand. Biyeong nimbly snatched it and placed it on the altar, sighing as she asked,
"I said hurry up and finish so we can go— what're you thinking about, spacing out like that?"
"I'm gonna get stronger. Gotta be the best."
The world is vast, full of geniuses and masters. If I could feel it so keenly in that fleeting moment outside Mount Hua's well, what'll it be like once I properly step into the martial world?
Biyeong handed me another tablet, replying half-heartedly to my resolute words.
"Yeah, yeah, pretty sure that's the hundredth time I've heard that."
"Yeah, I'm gonna be the best and fight all day, beat down all the Ten Great Masters."
"You losing it, senior brother? The Ten Great Masters aren't some dog's name."
"That's our big senior brother for you."
Bihwan, wiping the floor far from the altar, clicked his tongue.
I didn't wanna hear that from a chicken still keeping distance from the altar.