Under Crystal Palace (2)
“...Why me?”
That was the first question that came to mind. Of all people at the Crown Prince’s ball, why should I be the one honored to stand at her side?
When Ropena first told me about it, I’d assumed she meant to attend with her fiancé. But the words that came from her lips were a request for me to be her partner, and how could I not have been stunned?
“Why you, indeed.”
She stared at me for a moment, then frowned faintly as though displeased by something and spoke again.
“Do you dislike the idea?”
“It’s not that I dislike it, but don’t you already have a fiancé?”
I lowered my head, trying to hide the confusion written all over my face. Why would she ask me? Normally, such an occasion was one to attend with one’s fiancé.
Yet she had made that proposal to me, so it was only natural that I should be curious.
“A fiancé is only a fiancé. Not someone who’s always by my side.”
The voice that reached me then was so cold it made my shoulders twitch.
The expression that had looked perfectly fine only a moment ago darkened, and a chill settled in those eyes fixed on me.
Had I said something wrong? No matter how I thought about it, I couldn’t find any mistake in my own words.
Then the problem must have been the word fiancé.
All I knew about her came from a handful of descriptions in the novel, and that wasn’t nearly enough to tell me what her relationship with her fiancé was like. I only knew that she had been betrothed as a child.
Adel Roman, her fiancé, had no lack of merits. His looks were excellent, and his talent with the sword was said to be outstanding; besides, hadn’t they been engaged since childhood?
The novel hadn’t gone into Irene’s relationship with him, but I’d assumed that, having known each other since they were young, they must at least be on decent terms. It seemed I’d been wrong.
The way Irene’s gaze turned cold at the word fiancé told me she probably didn’t think very highly of him.
“...Will you be all right?”
Was it truly all right for me to accompany her? I asked carefully, and she nodded once in reply.
“It’ll be fine. It’s only a light social occasion this time, so don’t feel too burdened.”
She answered with easy composure, as though it meant nothing at all, but even so the faint worry that had risen in me didn’t fade so easily.
I still wasn’t sure it was really fine. Of course, the choice of ball partner was hers to make, but was I the right person for that role?
Watching Irene’s back as she grew farther and farther away from me, I let out a quiet sigh.
“Miss, there’s a letter from Roman...”
“I’ll read it later.”
It was obvious who it was from. I had no desire to read that letter at all.
It would only be the same content as always, with the added request that I attend this ball with him, so I lifted my teacup and turned my eyes away from the letter.
My hand trembled slightly around the cup.
As I remembered what I had just said to my escort knight, a strange heat rose to my face with the emotion that followed.
I had only asked him to be my partner for the ball. It was a simple request, something I’d done before and something I’d asked of others more than once.
So why did it feel so hard to say?
Had the words “come with me to the ball” always been so difficult to speak?
I clenched my hand in the air, then opened it again, recalling Evan’s startled expression from a moment ago.
Those wide eyes, as if he couldn’t quite believe what he had heard, had been almost ridiculous.
...This had clearly been a spontaneous decision on my part.
I’d done it because, at events like this, I wanted to avoid the fiancé I was always forced to be tied to, even if only for a little while.
That was why I had said those words to my escort knight.
Had Evan perhaps felt burdened by it?
For a moment regret rose in me, but I shook my head hard and threw the feeling off.
It wasn’t that important an occasion, and I couldn’t go to every single event with my fiancé, could I?
I simply wanted to attend this ball with a little more ease in my heart.
...Hah.
And then a dry laugh escaped me at my own thoughts.
Since when had I started thinking of Evan as such a comfortable presence?
It was absurd to realize that he felt easier to be around than the fiancé I’d known since childhood, even easier than some of the other young nobles I knew.
The more I pushed him away, the more he came closer, and though that could be suffocating, paradoxically I always felt at ease when he was beside me.
Was the green flame I had seen at the festival— the one only I had witnessed— born from those feelings too?
Yes. Evan was better. Far better than my fiancé.
At the thought of the man engaged to me and belonging to House Roman, my brow furrowed on its own.
He had no obvious flaws, and yet I couldn’t help but recoil from him, perhaps because of that unreadable interior of his.
He always smiled at me, but his insides looked black as ink, and whenever I looked at him, I kept my distance.
Maybe the difference between my fiancé and Evan was simply a difference in nature.
If his smile was a false one, then Evan’s was always a gentle smile that came straight from the heart.
“I’m already busy enough worrying about just you, Miss.”
The words I remembered made my hand around the teacup startle and twitch.
Even I, who thought myself fairly composed, had been thoroughly shaken when I heard them.
Only after I understood the meaning behind them did my expression settle again, but the aftershock remained, and the corner of my eye trembled faintly.
If another young lady had heard those words, she would have mistaken them for something worth delighting over all by herself.
Since that day’s tea party, he had received countless letters. Perhaps his handsome appearance had captured the hearts of young ladies.
Didn’t he say that even the letter in his hand today had come from a young lady?
For some reason, just remembering the elegantly wrapped letter on that fine paper made my mood sink.
What exactly was so appealing that they kept sending him letters? He was my escort knight, after all.
If they made such advances toward a man who barely had enough time to protect me as it was, and if his vigilance slipped because of it, what then? How could they act so thoughtlessly?
Wrinkles gathered between my brows.
Because the sticky feelings directed at my escort knight somehow made me uncomfortable.
The Darljeeling that had always seemed fragrant now tasted only bitter.
“Hehe.”
Noticing how I sighed with my face half-covered by my hand, Ropena smiled with narrowed eyes, clearly amused.
Was it so funny that I was going to the ball with Irene? And as her partner, no less?
Come to think of it, it was rather funny. A princess leaving her fiancé behind and attending a ball with her escort knight as her partner.
How was I supposed to make sense of a situation like this?
“Just think of it lightly. It’s only a simple occasion this time anyway, so other people won’t think that deeply about it either.”
“I hope so.”
A sigh slipped through the fingers covering my mouth. It was the Crown Prince’s ball, yes, but in the end it was only one more social event.
It wasn’t as though I could always go with my fiancé, and sometimes people attended with family or with someone they were close to instead of a fiancé. Maybe this really would be all right.
— She’s speaking not to Escort Knight Evan, but to Evan Fried.
He was the second son of Count Fried’s house, so in terms of status, he wasn’t exactly beneath her.
And besides, he was my escort knight in the end.
The feeling of burden didn’t disappear so easily, but once things had come to this, it was probably better to accept them.
After running a hand down my face once, I noticed Ropena watching me and opened my mouth.
“By the way, how did you manage it?”
“...Manage what?”
“I’ve never seen the Miss act this casually toward her escort knight before. I’ve been here for six years, and during that time you never really liked your escort knights all that much. The fact that you chose the knight instead of your fiancé as your ball partner makes it look like you really do feel comfortable around him.”
At that, I could only smile bitterly. Was that really what it looked like?
But whether she was looking at me or at anyone else, her gaze was still cold.
I was still nowhere to be found in that gaze, and the mask of indifference covering her face had not taken even the slightest crack.
She didn’t look as bleak as she had at the festival, but every so often I would remember that day and worry.
And judging from her expression earlier, Irene didn’t seem to get along very well with her fiancé, so perhaps she had simply chosen me because she didn’t want to attend with him.
It was Ropena’s bright voice that broke my thoughts at last. Her expression lightened again, and I looked at her with a faint smile.
“By the way, shouldn’t you be getting the clothes you’re going to wear?”
“Clothes, huh.”
Most of what I wore were just ordinary clothes, unless I was handling a sword, so I figured I’d probably have to wear something fairly formal this time. If I was going to stand beside Irene, I’d need to dress up properly.
“But I don’t have any clothes.”
The only things in my wardrobe were a few sets of everyday clothes.
It seemed the fellow who had possessed this body before me wasn’t interested in social events either, because there wasn’t a single flashy outfit suitable for a party.
The ball was tomorrow, and I couldn’t exactly go have something tailored now.
When I made a troubled face, Ropena waved a hand in the air as if to say not to worry.
“I’m sure if we look, we’ll find something. What’s your size?”
“...Even if I tell you my size, do you think there’ll be anything that fits me?”
When I asked that with a doubtful look, Ropena snorted and nodded.
“There’s an old saying in the capital: there’s nothing House Yuris doesn’t have. Just wait here. I’ll go find you something.”
And with that, she hurried off all of a sudden, leaving me staring after her in a daze. Was there really anything I could wear?
I killed time by looking up at the sky for a while, and then at last I heard light footsteps pattering toward me from far away.
The only person in this mansion who would run like that was probably Ropena.
When I lifted my head toward the sound, she waved both hands overhead and beckoned me to follow.
“You found something?”
When I asked, Ropena nodded and answered,
“I told you, didn’t I? There’s nothing House Yuris doesn’t have.”
I didn’t know why, in a place that had only Irene as a daughter, there happened to be clothes like this, but the fact that they existed made me breathe a sigh of relief.
I couldn’t very well fail to attend just because I had no clothes; if I had, Ropena would have mocked me for it for days on end.
And Irene would have been put in an awkward position too. I didn’t want my mistake to cause her any trouble, so I could honestly call this a blessing.
Following Ropena as she practically skipped along, looking quite pleased with herself, I watched as she went into the wardrobe room and came out a little later carrying a single outfit.
At a glance it looked so darkly blue it was nearly black, with black tones woven through it that brought obsidian to mind. It was a uniform, but an elegant one.
A white sash crossed diagonally over the front, blending perfectly with the rest of the garment and making it look quite striking.
The gold flowers embroidered into the white band stood out a little, but overall the design was beautifully balanced.
Still, this was my first time wearing a uniform like this, so I wondered whether it would suit me.
“Hurry up and try it on. That thing’s pretty expensive, you know. If you wear it to the ball, you’ll have all eyes on you.”
“I don’t really want all eyes on me, though.”
After shooting a look at Ropena, who was urging me on, I took the clothes from her and began slipping them over my ordinary wear.
The outfit was uncomfortable even to put on, so I doubted I’d ever wear it unless it was for a special case like this.
Fumbling a little, I fastened each button one by one, and once I had finally dressed fully in the uniform, the reflection in the mirror looked surprisingly decent.
It was a tightly fitted uniform, which meant my sculpted chest muscles showed through a little too clearly, and that was the only thing I wished I could somehow ignore.
Brushing my gold hair back and gazing into the mirror with slightly languid eyes, I found myself thinking once again that the hanger mattered.
If I had seen this same face before, I would have simply wanted to vomit. Yet now, wearing this expression, I looked rather good.
“...Wow.”
Apparently my appearance had surprised her, because Ropena let out a gasp with her eyes wide.
Still, at this point I shouldn’t look out of place standing beside Irene.
But every time I thought of the word ball, my thoughts tangled even more, and my face in the mirror was slightly twisted with it.