Victors Are Loyalists, Losers Are Rebels #7
No matter how many times they emphasized it, I didn't trust Britain's promises one bit. Naturally, I didn't believe for a second their talk of allying to curb China's expansionism and then handing Taiwan over to me like a loyal sidekick. What promise in history had those bastards ever kept properly? Israel, India—they were monkeys' paws compared to them.
So I didn't wish for any alliance or Taiwan or anything else. But—and this was key—if I played both sides with America, Britain would drop Taiwan into China's jaws like a gravitational pull. Gladstone had called selling opium to a country that banned it "moral politics," after all. They knew it was immoral but did it for negotiations. They probably figured Korea or Japan needed Taiwan. Truth be told, I was scared shitless, even if I didn't show it. Somalia was still burning fiercely right now. True to the Great Pirate Era, they were starting by seizing the pirate peninsula.
So, much to the regret of the fatso who'd sailed all the way from there to London, accepting his proposal now would mean Taiwan—once infamous for pirates—falling straight into Britain's, or rather British China's, mouth. I kindly explained this to the fatso. No sense in misunderstandings, right?
"So, Korea doesn't really need Taiwan, then?"
"Same as Japan. If I had to name a hope, it'd be that they live on as a sovereign nation with autonomy."
"But that's just a hope, in the end. Honestly, it doesn't seem likely to happen easily or quickly."
"Ahem."
Theodore, who'd come to London chasing Japan only to get bogged down in this boring Taiwan talk, clearly found it dull, but I pressed on.
"So Korea for Taiwan, America for Japan—those promises are tough. Ah, the latter's fine, though."
"If America leads Japan down the 'path of civilization' like the Philippines, I'd fully endorse it."
Truly an incomprehensible man.
I thought I'd get it if I became president, but no. What the hell does this guy think about all day?
This is basically just 'let Japan do whatever.' Is he trying to pit us against Britain? What the hell is this Easterner aiming for?
Knock knock.
"?"
"Mr. President, may I come in for a moment?"
The president glanced at the Supreme Leader, who nodded without a second thought.
"Your Excellency, a declaration of independence was announced in the Philippines a few days ago."
The president turned to the Supreme Leader right beside him.
...Not me. Why does everyone look at me every time something blows up in East Asia? The Philippines is Southeast Asia, for fuck's sake.
I swallowed hard and chose silence. Unfortunately, this was Britain—London. The Anglo-Saxon maw. Yeah, silence my ass; I was immediately dragged into an Anglo-Saxon interrogation.
"Does the defendant truly claim innocence?!"
"Break that bastard!"
English didn't originally mean that, but why did it sound like it? I was getting seriously pissed at the fatso's squawking about Philippine interests.
London really wasn't a place for a pure Easterner like me. But regrettably, I did bear some responsibility for the Philippine mess. Arming them? Probably me. Shoving American bootlickers in? Likely me too. So Theodore probably had a rough idea of what I'd done there. The guy was a pro at crushing rebels, even if not full wars.
Was there ever a perfect lie in this world? The syphilis experiments on Black people were real experiments that existed. The key was becoming someone who could brazenly lie and get away with it.
I met Theodore's glare—he was itching to yell, "This isn't what we agreed!"
Damn, no faith. It's really not me.
Amid the holy pressure to promise, I gave them the answer they wanted. Korea had zero involvement; America and Britain could bake or boil the Philippines as they pleased—I'd turn a blind eye.
Man, persecuting an innocent Easterner just for being Eastern.
Time to bail.
London truly wasn't for someone like me.
Long live the Zhonghua Revolution! Long live the Zhonghua people! Send the foreign devils back to hell!
"Ok-gyun."
"Yes, Supreme Leader."
"Why is the house on fire?"
"Seems like people stirred up by the Philippine uprising are rioting."
"Rioting?"
After I'd gone to the opposite side of the planet to London just to avoid this shit, pouring insane money and time into the barren lands, and this was the result?
"Shall we suppress them?"
"No, no, no! That'd ruin the country."
"Better... yeah."
This called for that.
"In a week, hold a dumpling festival."
"Dumpling festival?"
"The World's Greatest Dumpling Contest!!"
"The. World's. Greatest. Dumpling. Con. Test!!!! Award prizes for the biggest dumpling, the most dumplings, the tastiest—and hand over the 'World's Fairest Beauty' title for a year!"
"A month after, hold a noodle festival."
"..."
"Man, woman, kid, adult—get everyone home kneading dough! Tell 'em to stuff dumplings!!!"
Step out for a minute and the house is a total mess!
While U.S. forces fought in the Philippines, the Supreme Leader battled at home. No Zhonghua Revolution in Earth-2 East Asia.
"Fire's finally lit in Korea."
"Mr. Ito's handiwork?"
"Hardly. I just gave them the boat."
And leaked that Korea and America were meeting in London. That's why he stayed in London—miss this window, and no chance later. Did I have to spell it out?
"The Westerners lit Asia's fire themselves, no?"
Exploiting China, exploiting Japan, trying to exploit Korea—fire hits the Philippines, spreads to Korea naturally. Korea aflame means China and Japan follow. Korea had the spark right now.
"That heavy-ass won't sit still forever."
"Will the Supreme Leader really move?"
"Honestly, he's petty—sees the big picture but lacks magnanimity. But he's bold, decisive. And quick on the math."
Ito flipped open the dreadnought catalog in his hand.
"They're already building dreadnoughts. Once done, oshima'i."
"If that monster fleet rolls into East Asia with escorts, Korea might hold, but Japan? Done."
"And then Korea tosses Japan to the West like old China."
And devours us guts and all. Sadly, Japan had no battleships now. Thanks to who? All to Dragon Palace.
But Japan had one thing left. Ito knew it: shipbuilding capacity.
"If Korea gives Japan money, resources, manpower, we can build dreadnought-class ships right away. And only Japan can in East Asia."
"Watch. The guy treating Japan like fish bait now will reach out soon. Time's tight, after all."
He fears the Chinese revolution and Western invasion more than anyone. Nature doesn't change.
"Start building now, we don't miss the chance. Never seen him miss one."
Ito smiled.
But Ito's scheme never materialized. The Supreme Leader just got America to send "Please don't touch the Philippines" subs en masse.
For Korea, already negotiating subs with Britain, this locked in a domestic sub fleet. Tired of driving foreign cars forever.
"Seal the borders."
"No."
Like banning Muslims nationwide from Mecca?
"Ideology checks."
"Hell no."
Phoenix Program redux.
"Just do the dumpling contest as told. Chinese won't admit their dumplings suck if their lives depended on it."
Chinese birthright to dumplings trumps national rights. Obviously.
"So what's the root cause?"
"Open borders—hunting it is time waste."
One answer.
"Gotta be more careful..."
I get it. Korea's kinda poor. Why? I control all the gold, Russian-style.
Guarantee: controlled economy never gets rich. Sending gold to local banks, local autonomy—doesn't end control. Korea was full-on controlled economy, especially currency/gold trade.
And heavy industry all-in. Classic wage exploitation. No unemployment, but low-wage workers overflowed. Perfect for revolution.
No matter three squares, no commute, side gigs for all—the essence stayed.
"Wanna ride this till gold standard deforms, but any other way?"
"If Britain lacks gold, they can take ours, right?"
"That's fine. Drop in the bucket. They don't know our total gold like you don't, Ok-gyun."
But right Rx for revolutionaries: economy.
"Can't flood banks with more gold for boom—they learn we have real gold, shit gets fun. Print without gold? Even funnier."
The Supreme Leader continued, looking bored as hell.
"Need to expand currency sans inflation for boom."
"Possible?"
"Dunno."
Coupons kill state trust. But Britain's watch too tight for local bank gold deposits. Risky guaranteeing amid their schemes...
Come to think: another gold-less country like Korea. Weimar Republic. Not yet, but they lost gold to reparations. Fought hyperinflation with Rentenmark, land-backed burnable notes. Fixed issue, state-guaranteed value.
If temporary domestic fix for gold shortage? Might work...