Aftermath of War (1)
The funeral had finally begun.
The fallen could no longer be left lying on the cold ground. To honor their souls, the soldiers and knights of the Crystal family wept before each of their portraits.
Shirin was no exception.
No one yet knew that a successor had emerged from Crystal, the last vacant seat among the Four Divine Beasts' successors. Only a handful of people were aware of the truth.
There were other reasons as well, but the biggest one was Shirin's protection.
Crystal Territory was currently unstable from within. Naturally, Topaz, a Sword Master, had been the pillar holding it together—until her death left that pillar gone. If a new successor of the White Tiger were to appear in the middle of such a crisis, the environment would inevitably pile crushing pressure upon that person's shoulders.
But Shirin was still only sixteen. If that weight were compounded by her helplessness and loneliness over losing her father, I feared it would break her—which was why I had chosen to keep it hidden.
First, I told only a select few—Gerald, Jewely, Khan, and Fairy—that the White Tiger's successor was Shirin, and asked them to keep it secret for the time being. Thanks to that, Shirin could still feel nothing but grief and cry to her heart's content. If everyone attending had known she'd become the successor, duty and expectation would have sealed her lips even before the very father she cherished most.
Of course, hiding it forever was impossible.
Besides, considering Shirin's position, I doubted the secret would last long at all. She was Topaz's daughter, and her hair had changed from black to white—people were bound to grow suspicious of the transformation. Especially since it wasn't pure white, but a pale blue-white. All the more so.
After the funeral, I planned to move fast.
I had left Cumul Territory unattended for far too long. Judging by its current state, things still looked passable, but suspicious signs had begun appearing one by one—so Ellie's return there had to be arranged.
If she were strong enough to make the journey alone—Sword Master tier, at least—I could have sent her off with a somewhat lighter heart.
But the factions coveting her were a dime a dozen. And Asmodeus, the one we'd tragically let slip away in the Elaon Forest, was likely still alive. Unless he'd died for some absurd reason, the odds were high that he had survived.
Which meant he would almost certainly return as an enemy blocking our path with even greater power. Sending Ellie into that alone?
It would be no different from sending her to her death. How could I?
Since Cumul Territory could come under attack at any moment, the faster we moved, the better. So I decided Shirin's training would begin after the funeral ended. Shirin herself, understanding the situation, had readily agreed.
For now, she was nothing more than a girl who had lost her father, so I let her weep.
Come to think of it, I'd noticed Fairy flinching slightly whenever she looked at Ellie. It probably stemmed from Ellie taking Florence's attack in her place during the battle.
There was so much to do and so little time. I decided to start by resolving the—conflict, for lack of a better word—between Fairy and Ellie.
Over the three days of the funeral, I spoke with Khan separately and arranged for Ellie and Fairy to meet more frequently. But every time, Fairy would brush off Ellie's attempts at conversation, grow visibly anxious, and end up looking mentally exhausted. Even on the funeral's final day, their relationship hadn't changed an inch. It was hard to believe these were the same people who once walked arm in arm down the streets.
"Khan. How's Fairy doing?"
Fairy's condition had deteriorated rapidly.
"Hah... she's improved a little... but I don't think simply nudging them together and hoping they talk it out is going to fix this."
Every time Fairy looked at Ellie, she couldn't get a word out. Ellie, startled by her reaction, would ask if she was all right—but her answer was always the same.
"I-I'm... f-fine...! Unnie..."
Fairy spoke in a cowed, shrunken voice, so unlike the bright, lively girl I'd known before.
Watching this, Khan said, "I think she's reverted to her old personality. She seems convinced that everything is her fault."
Back when Fairy was brutally abused by her old tutor, the woman had gaslit her—insisting that everything was Fairy's fault, dumping every ounce of blame onto her shoulders. Because of that, Fairy had developed a habit of perpetual self-blame. Khan had managed to correct all her other traits, but that one—the one that tormented her most—he told me even he couldn't undo.
Most likely, Ellie had taken a deep wound on the battlefield and lain unconscious for days, and Fairy was stressing herself sick believing it was her own doing.
Wondering whether Ellie's own feelings toward Fairy weren't negative, Khan turned and asked her directly.
"And you, Lady Alice? What do you think of Fairy?"
If Ellie had been the sort of person to bear malice toward her, this whole mess would have dragged on for ages. But the Ellie I knew was never that petty.
"She's precious to me. My first real friend—and I still think of her that way. Honestly, I'm more worried about her than anything."
Worried about Fairy, of all things. Because every time Ellie approached her, Fairy's face went pale before insisting she was fine. How could Ellie possibly miss that?
"The day after tomorrow, Ellie wants to meet Fairy in person. Can you talk her into it?"
"Hah... you know as well as I do, she might not accept."
"It can't be helped. We can't keep going on like this."
"That's true, but you have to consider Fairy's feelings too."
"I know... that's why you need to persuade her as hard as you can. If this goes on, Fairy's going to break."
If things continued this way, Fairy's mind really would give out. She was only holding together because Khan stayed by her side, soothing her. But that was just a stopgap against further stress—not a solution. Knowing this, Khan nodded.
"Whew... all right. I'll do my best."
Fairy's suffering was wearing Khan down too. Probably because she was his contractor. I thumped his shoulder in encouragement, and he looked up at me with a faint, weary smile. At that silent word of thanks, I smiled back brightly and headed toward where Shirin was.
As I walked the halls on and on, the scenery from the game surfaced in my mind. Shirin could only ever be seen at the training grounds in two cases: when she was depressed, or when her mind had been pushed past its limit.
She always held her sword there, and she never sat in some tucked-away corner—always dead center. Why she'd made the training grounds her sanctuary, I couldn't say. In the game, Shirin never spoke about why she'd chosen that place as her place of rest. Among the players before I entered this world, the theory that she sat in the center of the training grounds to imagine her father there had all but hardened into consensus.
So, knowing that, I steered my steps toward the training grounds, half expecting to find her there. I'd told Ellie to head over ahead of me before I met with Khan, so the two of them were probably together already.
Sure enough, the moment I stepped inside, I heard Ellie and Shirin talking.
"Daddy... sob...!"
Just as I'd thought—Shirin was in the middle of the training grounds, buried in Ellie's arms, weeping her heart out.
Her father's death was only now truly reaching her on an instinctive level. The helplessness, the fear, and the loneliness of being left alone in the world would gnaw at her more and more from here on.
The way they'd gnawed at me.
But I would never let her suffer the way I had. After my parents died, I wasted a full four years of my life like a shell of a man. Do you know what happens to a person who does nothing but game-sleep-game-sleep, over and over?
The anxiety creeps in. Whether this is okay. Whether it's all right to live like this. By the time you finally come to your senses, it's already too late. There's nothing around you anymore—just a game screen and a computer waiting to welcome you back. And so, naturally, you tumble straight back into the vicious cycle.
That cycle isn't unique to me. If I'd had even one person I could truly rely on, would I have lived like a wreck? Of course not. With their help, I could have picked myself up and stood again.
I came to my senses eventually—but I failed to return to any kind of normal life. Which means someone like me, someone who's failed before, should be the one to support her. Just as the White Tiger asked.
When I announced my presence and entered the training grounds, Shirin and Ellie's heads turned naturally toward me. I walked to the very center and spoke to Shirin.
"It's okay to cry, Shirin. But I don't want you carrying negative thoughts and feelings around for too long. Those feelings will wear you down, and eventually they'll swallow you whole and leave you unable to do anything at all."
I caught the look in Shirin's eyes. Fear of the future weighed heavily in them—fear, no doubt, of having become the White Tiger's successor, and of the reality that she now had no one left at her side.
"You're anxious right now, aren't you? Out of nowhere, the White Tiger—one of the Four Divine Beasts—gave you this mysterious power."
Shirin nodded slowly, up and down, in agreement.
"And now you've been left alone in the world, so there's that vague dread too."
Her nodding head lifted to look up at me, and she spoke in a voice thick with tears.
"Why... how... do you know that...?"
"Because I've already been through the same pain once."
"...You... you're a successor...?"
I nodded.
"I lost my parents too, and it nearly destroyed me. The anxiety and fear of being left alone in the world were more than I could bear by myself."
"..."
"I somehow gritted my teeth and scraped by, but by the time I finally came to my senses, my life was a gutter. That's why I don't want that for you. Before you became the successor, I went to meet the White Tiger myself."
"...What?"
At my words, her eyes went wide and she stared at me in astonishment. Ellie had reacted the exact same way when I told her. That kind of reaction was the normal one—it made sense. In our world, it would be like claiming you'd been granted an audience with God Himself. Naturally they'd be stunned.
And even if they wanted to dismiss it as a lie, they couldn't—my standing as the Azure Dragon's successor lent it a credibility they couldn't escape even if they wanted to. Besides, I'd already shown Shirin. She knew I'd blacked out and collapsed mid-conversation with her once, so when I explained that I'd met the White Tiger during that collapse, understanding dawned on her almost immediately.
I passed on to her, word for word, what the White Tiger had told me.
"The White Tiger gave me a message. Since you're his beloved child, he asked me to become your teacher."
"Your... teacher?"
"Yes."
"What... what kind of teacher...?"
"Originally, my role was meant to help you grow mentally and emotionally... but seeing how things stand, I'll help you learn to wield your authority freely until you've mastered it. Is that all right with you?"
Shirin wiped her tears and answered.
"Yes. That's fine. I'll study hard. So please... please don't abandon me?"
"Of course not."
If I did, I shudder to think what punishment the White Tiger might visit upon me.
Well then—Shirin and I would spar against Ellie first. If we started with authority practice, the training grounds would instantly become a sea of ice. Even if she turned the ice back with her power, the lingering cold would stiffen our bodies and leave us in no condition to fence.
When I raised my head and asked Ellie to face us both in a spar, I had no idea what I was in for.
"Ellie, listen, that is—?!!"
Ellie's expression went cold.
...Oh no. She looks seriously angry...
"U-um..."
"Hyun. Go fetch three wooden swords from over there. Now."
"O-okay..."
I hurried back with three training swords. Shirin and I each took one, and as Ellie watched, she extended her empty hand toward us and made some kind of gesture. A moment later she lowered her arm, raised her sword, and said:
"Come at me. And Shirin—don't hold back."
Shirin burned with fighting spirit just as she'd been told, but I was quietly worried about Ellie. No—even if we didn't use our authorities, we were women who could cleave demons in half with a single blade. The worry should have been the other way around.
Of course, that concern evaporated within ten minutes. Ellie read every opening in our guards with overwhelming swordsmanship and landed clean, decisive strikes. Shirin would stop her blade just before impact and receive pointers.
Me?
"Oof!"
No mercy. I just got hit.
It HURT. I'm not joking—every strike genuinely hurt. But what kind of teacher whines in pain in front of his own student? Endure it. That was all there was to it.
Ellie's brutal "spar" that was really a beating hurt like hell. I took so many hits that when I later taught Shirin her authority, every movement of my body ached.
When the sparring ended, the scene that greeted us was this: Shirin panting and winded from pure physical exhaustion—and me, simply in pain. No bruises. Just pain. When I checked under my clothes, there wasn't a single wound.
That must have been why Ellie had reached her hand out earlier—she'd wrapped mana around my entire body to keep me from getting cuts or bruises. The impact, of course, still passed through untouched. Which is exactly why it hurt so damn much.
And so I arrived at exactly one conclusion.
'She's mad. ...Now what?'
I had never seen Ellie this angry before. Sure, I'd seen her grumble playfully or sulk...
But this blazing fury was a first.
By the time the sparring ended and night began to fall, we agreed to pick things up tomorrow. Shirin made her way to her room, while Ellie and I walked toward ours.
We barely exchanged a word the whole way there. We simply walked in silence. When we were nearly at the door, Ellie spoke in a careful voice.
"Are you... okay?"
She looked up at me with worry written across her face—on the verge of tears, almost.
"You're the one who beat me black and blue, so why are you making a face like you're about to cry...?"
At my chuckle, Ellie buried herself against me, tears brimming.
"...I'm sorry. Still... you made me so angry, Hyun."
"About what?"
"Hyun, why didn't you tell me the White Tiger chose you to be Shirin's teacher? Why didn't you tell me why you collapsed while I was bedridden? Why do you keep trying to shoulder everything alone...?"
"You know better than anyone that dredging up that painful past is the hardest thing in the world for you. So why didn't you say anything?"
"...Ah."
I understood now. Her anger hadn't come from anything petty, like feeling neglected.
Ellie was one of the people who had watched me from the closest vantage point. She knew full well how relentlessly I'd been running. While she was unconscious, I had been helping Khan with the reconstruction plans—work far too vast for Gerald and Crystal Territory to shoulder alone. The collapse of the great outer walls had been the biggest blow.
I had stood as the linchpin between Ellie and Gerald, driving their reconstruction forward, while Khan contacted the Flott family in the north to secure their aid. On top of that, I was juggling Shirin's mental care, acting as her teacher so she could handle her authority properly, and mediating between Fairy and Ellie—not to mention attending the funeral and struggling alongside Khan to mend Fairy's state. From where Ellie stood, it must have looked like I was grinding myself into dust.
Even by my own judgment, this past week had been brutal. Ever since the battle with Florence.
And it had been unavoidable. If we wanted to return to Cumul Territory quickly, that is.
"Why do you suffer alone? Why do I keep finding out about these things from your mouth only after the fact? Why..."
"There was no other way... I had to get back to Cumul Territory fast."
"Then I could go alone. Instead of you wearing yourself down like this just to return there, it'd be better if I went back by myself."
"I don't want that. I wouldn't be there. If anything like what happened to Crystal Territory happens again, what am I supposed to do? Cumul is in the east—on the complete opposite side of the continent from Crystal in the west."
"And if you fall into danger out there?"
"..."
"The authority of the Four Perils and the demons is far too powerful to send you into alone. I nearly lost you once more in the battle with Florence, remember?"
The authority of a Peril isn't something human swordsmanship alone can slip past. At the very least, you'd need something like the Sword Flame of a Sword Master to even attempt it...
"Then I'll help too. That way you won't have to suffer so much. So let's finish fast and go home. To Cumul Territory?"
I patted Ellie's head and nodded. She pressed her head into my chest and spoke cautiously.
"I'm embarrassed... I can't control my temper, and I end up hitting the person I care about most..."
I laughed softly.
"It happens. I forgive you. But if you do it again, no forgiveness."
"Grrr...!! But you were at fault this time too!"
And so the quarrel between Ellie and me—born of our differences of opinion, and begun as if it had never been a real fight at all—came to an end like this.
Right up until she drifted off to sleep, Ellie kept imploring me to hand some of my burdens over to her.
Florence, that bastard—how many people is he making suffer?
Khan and I were run ragged covering for the war, its countermeasures, and the people broken by its aftermath. Ellie had nearly died from the wounds he dealt her directly, yet still helped rebuild the territory, then blew up at me to voice how hurt she felt. Fairy was paralyzed by the severe stress the battle left her with. Shirin had lost her father and been saddled with crushing obligations. And Gerald and all of Crystal Territory were racking their brains over reconstruction.
The architect of all of it was, in the end, Florence.
"Hah... if I'm working tomorrow too, I need to sleep."
Getting angry changes nothing. So first things first: conserve my strength. If I collapsed from exhaustion, Ellie would surely get angry again—and this time she wouldn't forgive me.
Praying that tomorrow's work would go smoothly, I surrendered myself to sleep.