I Cannot Accept a Goddess Like This (3)
"S-Sister… I thought I was going to die…"
Damn it. It was clearly my fault. After growing accustomed to divine power, I had underestimated the demons and let my guard down. They were still beings that defied human common sense. Some of them had that trash-like nature—if they were going to die anyway, they would drag at least one more person down with them. I hadn’t considered that they would try to screw me over no matter what.
"Yeah… Let’s get out of here quickly. You must have been terrified? …Tsk. I’m sorry."
How difficult it must have been for her, trapped inside that small barrel.
"Ah. So it was the Saintess… I’m sorry…"
Whether she was a nun or a saintess hardly mattered right now. I pulled the child—who was still gasping for breath and barely able to speak—tighter into my arms.
"It’s all right. Keep your mouth covered or you’ll swallow smoke…"
Seeing that the children were conscious eased my mind, at least a little.
How are we supposed to get out?
After confirming their condition, the real problem was returning safely with them in tow.
"The window…"
The prayer room tucked into the corner of the chapel had no proper door. What kind of prayer room didn’t even have a single window!
――Was the only choice to trust in divine power and make a run for it?
Whoosh!
There was no time to deliberate. Even in the brief moment I hesitated, the flames that had started in the chapel were already spreading into the prayer room.
"Mother, please protect us from the inferno."
Hmm… Even if it’s hot, bear with it a little. That is demonic flame, so a bit of heat can’t be helped.
Divine power wasn’t omnipotent, it seemed. Still, if the goddess told me to endure it, I could probably manage. If it became unbearable, I could always step outside and heal afterward.
The question is whether the children can endure it.
The two children clung to my arm as though it were a lifeline pulling them from hell. They gripped me with the desperate certainty that they would never let go, their breathing growing shallower by the moment.
Looking at them, a scene from a very distant past suddenly surfaced.
The child clutching the black book was, even as her consciousness faded, using what little strength remained in her small fingers to keep a death grip on it. To receive such faith from a child—even from a goddess like this. I wasn’t sure whether it was an honor I truly deserved.
"Hoo… Inhale. Hoo… Haap…!"
The moment my resolve hardened, I wrapped the children in the thickest layer of divine power I could manage. I took a deep breath, held it, then kicked off the groaning floor and sprinted with everything I had.
Kicking aside chairs already devoured by flame, I burst through the chapel doors. Behind me—
Crack. Crunch!
The chapel, finally consumed by the blaze, began to collapse slowly at my back. A glance toward where the prayer room had been showed it had already caved in completely. If I had hesitated even a second longer—
Hoo. I don’t even want to imagine it.
Believing the danger had passed, the tension drained from my body and I sank slowly to the ground. Extinguishing the fire could wait. I had already checked with clairvoyance—there was no one else near the chapel except these children.
First, I need to check on the kids.
Both of them were still clinging to my forearms, leaning against my chest with my palms as pillows, unconscious as though they had simply fallen into a deep sleep. The very thing I had considered useless and cumbersome had proven this helpful. I stared blankly at the unfamiliar sight for a long time.
Every time I panted and my chest rose and fell, the children pressed even closer, as if trying to burrow into me.
Is this a sight every mother in the world sees at least once…?
I had never had a child of my own, yet now I understood what kind of emotion one felt when looking at them. Truly, one lives and learns.
Still seated, I carefully laid both children on the ground as gently as a mother trying not to wake her sleeping babies.
"Hehe. Cream bread…"
She’s even talking in her sleep. Looks like I don’t have to worry too much.
"Huu."
I wasn’t out of breath from running, but having to leap around avoiding flames without the use of both arms had left me needing several deep breaths. Or perhaps it was because the children had kept bumping their heads against my chest the entire time. My top was slightly disheveled, but I left it. I could already see the Pope’s location by the pillar of light, and the only others nearby were the nuns.
As expected, breathing fresh air really is more important than I thought.
I took several long breaths while scanning the area for any other children, but there was no one. It was good that the vicinity was empty, yet I couldn’t simply rejoice. A fire this large had broken out and still no one had come.
Perhaps the situation hasn’t been resolved elsewhere either.
There was some distance between the dining hall and the chapel, but I hadn’t expected the complete absence of any human presence.
"What do I do now…"
I felt lost. Leaving the children behind was out of the question. Yet waiting for them to recover posed its own problems. As I tapped the ground with my index finger, searching for any other option, the child I thought had fainted—the one still hugging the black book—suddenly grabbed my finger tightly.
"Hm?"
Had she regained consciousness? Her recovery was faster than I expected.
"S-Saintess… Are you all right?"
Someone who worried about me without regard for their own condition came to mind.
『Brother. Are you okay?』
She looked about the same age, and the memory caught in my throat.
"Y-Yeah… Of course I’m all right."
I had thought I had shaken off giving that same answer, but apparently not.
That’s right. Now I have the power to heal others myself.
I was no longer the helpless person who could only scream for someone to save my sister.
"Mother. Bestow your touch upon my hands."
Heal? Or destroy?
Obviously heal.
Still, it’s better to ask, isn’t it?
She wasn’t wrong.
[Zap!]
After the Earth Mother’s strange little shout, brilliant divine power enveloped my hand.
"Mmm. Saintess’s hand is so warm."
There were many ways to heal. I could fire beams filled with restorative energy, or create a zone that rapidly recovered stamina if one remained inside it. But for healing two children this close, nothing seemed better than the direct method.
"Little one, could you let go of my finger for just a moment?"
"Yes."
Though she seemed reluctant, the child who had been scratching my fingertip slowly withdrew her hand to her chest. The sensation was different from when she used to tickle and torment my side. A gentle smile rose to my lips without me realizing.
Shall we begin?
I placed my hands on the children’s heads and poured divine power into both palms. Their bodies began to glow softly. The one busy devouring cream bread and chocolate bread in her dream probably didn’t notice, but the child who had clung to my finger until the end seemed to sense the divine power flowing through her. She stared at me in a daze.
"…My name is Ailin."
The mischievous spark she had shown while tickling me was gone. The child’s expression as she suddenly announced her name was solemn, as though she had reached some firm decision.
"Hm?"
"One day, like the Saintess, I will heal other people with divine power."
I gazed at Ailin as she declared her bold aspiration. How could she resemble her so much?
"Rayna——."
The moment I unconsciously called the name of my sister who had died over a hundred years ago, the usual crushing pain in my chest did not come. After forgetting for so long, had it finally begun to settle?
"Is that the Saintess’s name?"
"…My name?"
I firmly closed the lips that had been about to deny it.
Now that I think about it, I still haven’t decided what to do about my name.
Rayden was unmistakably a man’s name no matter who heard it. Continuing to use it felt wrong, yet no suitable alternative came to mind when I tried to think of one.
"Yes… Everyone only calls you Saintess, so I didn’t know your name. The ‘Rayna’ you just said…"
――Yes. You always said you wanted to heal others and help them. Even when those worthless, money-obsessed trash who had no ability abandoned you among the monsters.
I suppose I must fulfill your wish.
"Yes. My name is Rayna."
My sister. My one and only sister. So that your name may remain forever in people’s memories as a brilliant and benevolent saintess——.
――I will strive to achieve what you could not.
"If you make the effort, it will definitely come true."
I wasn’t sure whether I was encouraging Ailin or speaking to myself.
"Yes!"
The child’s bright smile stirred something deep inside my chest.
"Then can I become as pretty as the Saintess? How should I try?"
This little kid. She already made one huge wish… and now she wants something else? …Isn’t she too greedy?
Even if the Earth Mother was a goddess like this, just as I—who had once hated people so deeply—had come to believe in them again, nothing remained unchanged forever.
"You’ll become pretty too. Don’t be picky with your food, and listen well to the head nun."
I couldn’t understand women’s craving for beauty, but I wasn’t so stubborn that I couldn’t say a few empty words to make someone feel better. I could at least offer a kind remark. Besides, it might make the other nuns suffer a little less while raising this mischievous child.
"Will my chest get bigger too? It felt so soft and nice when I was being held…"
Hmm. This kid knows a thing or two? The Saintess does have large breasts. That is my preference, after all.
Ailin’s eyes turned toward my chest. The gaze was so intense that I flinched. I hurriedly crossed both arms in an X over my chest and yanked my disheveled top back into place.
She’s quite the young lady… What is that pose?
I used to wonder why women reacted that way. Now that I had experienced it myself, I understood a little.
"……"
Is this child also living a second life like me?
That’s not it.
So she had simply been like this from the start. Last time she had also asked when she would get to touch a saintess.
"Saintess. It’s too hard… Can I lie down a little longer?"
"Of course."
Anyway, we couldn’t move until the other child woke up. Even if I fought the demons by launching lumps of divine power or beams from a distance, carrying the children the entire time would be too burdensome.
I don’t know what this child might do, either.
I didn’t have the confidence to casually hold a child with such a dark heart in my arms.
But why didn’t you ask me to find the children for you?
Huh?
If you had told me, I would have found them.
Is that something you say now—
No, didn’t you only mention that clairvoyance was possible earlier!?
That’s because you wished for clairvoyance. If you had asked me to find the children, I would have helped.
Do you only grant it if I phrase it exactly like that!?
It can’t be helped. If I intervene directly, the Demon God would gain justification—.
I couldn’t bring myself to grow any angrier at the Earth Mother’s shrinking tone. It wasn’t something I couldn’t understand. Still, it was difficult to accept right away.
And one of these children was fated to die.
What was this about now?
What do you mean?
If you make a wish that controls another’s life, it damages that person’s soul as well. Unlike healing, you’re borrowing from other gods, so a price must inevitably be paid.
No way.
Yes. You asked that the child not be allowed to die.
So that was what she meant by it being expensive.
Did you have to make the child owe such a debt? Are you even truly a goddess?
It was that desperate a wish for this child. You cannot decide that for her.
I cannot accept a goddess like this.
How could a child make such a wish…
That is the mission of those who serve the will of the gods. You are not so different. No matter how much I favor you.