57. Family (3)
57. Family (3)
Sseueub... Huu...
I am smoking my pipe tobacco again today, as always.
The frequency of my smoking has been increasing lately. It's not that I've become addicted to the tobacco, but rather because my body keeps insisting that I eat humans.
If I don't smoke even for a little while, an impulse to devour every living thing around me arises, so I can't take the pipe tobacco out of my mouth.
The reason this has suddenly worsened is because of Gwen.
My head was blown off by Gwen, and in the process of saving her, I used an excessive amount of Holy Power and saliva, causing a lot of the energy in my body to be depleted.
To compensate for that depletion, I naturally need to replenish my energy. The problem is that the way to replenish that energy is by consuming humans.
Since I don't usually use much energy, I was able to suppress the impulse to some extent with the smoke created by burning human flesh.
But now, it's different.
It feels like drinking only water after starving for a week.
Smoke just can't satisfy me. It only moistens my parched mouth; it doesn't provide any feeling of fullness.
==
The next day.
Amber woke me up.
I had originally intended to return to the Orphanage starting today, but I gave up on that because I felt like I would end up devouring all the future food sources if I went there now.
It has become hard to endure my brain constantly telling me that even Amber, who is right in front of me, is not my maid but just a piece of food.
"How about you at least eat breakfast?"
Even if I eat breakfast, it's useless if the dish is just ordinary food.
However, since there was a time when I was human, I went to the table where breakfast was set, harboring a slight hope: Wouldn't it be okay if I could feel the satisfaction that humans feel?
Narim, who was kidnapped by me and spends all day cooking here, was waiting for me with slightly trembling hands, unlike usual.
I wondered if something was wrong, but the moment I scooped up a spoonful of the dish to eat it...
The smell from the dish entered my nose.
My brain didn't just react to the smell and say, "That looks delicious." My entire body reacted.
A reaction that this dish would be more delicious than any other.
And knowing the reason for this reaction, I set the spoon I was holding down on the table and reached out toward Narim.
My blackened arm stretched out and grabbed Narim's neck tightly.
"Kyaak-!"
"Le, Lea-nim!"
Amber approached me urgently.
Then, she grabbed my hand that was holding Narim's neck.
She wasn't using force, just trying to get me to come to my senses.
I glared at Amber.
As soon as Amber made eye contact with me, her pupils began to tremble violently, but even so, she did not avoid my gaze.
It was the first time.
Since I've been living as the Queen, it was the first time someone hadn't avoided my eyes.
Even Dagos, Evolute, and Gluttony couldn't meet my angry, glaring gaze and would run away to avoid looking me in the eyes.
Yet Amber looked at me while trembling.
It felt like, for the first time, someone was looking at me as human to human.
Thump.
"Cough! Cough!"
"Amber. Tell Stacey to eat this."
I put the pipe tobacco that was next to me in my mouth and headed back to the bed.
Lying on the bed, I composed myself.
It seemed I wasn't in my right mind due to the stress from hunger.
When Narim put out a dish made from humans, I snapped for a moment.
I was already suppressing the stress that kept building up from trying not to eat humans, and when a human dish suddenly appeared, I lost my reason for a moment.
From Narim's perspective, she must have been flustered.
The reason she is here is to cook. That cooking included human ingredients.
So, it looked like she wanted to make a dish using humans as an ingredient and get evaluated by me.
I didn't explain things well to Narim.
I should have explained properly that Narim making dishes using humans is for feeding our Creature children or kids like Stacey, not because I wanted to eat them.
Not knowing that, Narim made a big resolve and presented the human dish to me, but instead, she was attacked.
"Haa..."
I thought I was holding up well, but it seems my mind had been accumulating stress without me knowing.
"What should I do about this..."
Even if I am the Queen of the Creatures, I am ultimately just a living being.
Any living being needs energy to move. Humans need animals and plants, animals need animals or plants, and plants need sunlight and water.
Creatures need to eat humans to live.
The only reason I was able to endure without eating humans for the past few months is that I am a special entity called the Queen, so it was possible to some extent.
I keep thinking, If my head hadn't been blown off by Gwen, wouldn't I have been able to hold out for a few more months without much stress? But I shouldn't think like this.
Eventually, this situation would have come. It's better to experience it during a peaceful time like now.
"Le, Lea-unni... I, I'm sorry."
Narim approached me hesitantly and bowed her waist deeply as she spoke.
Ha... What kind of disgraceful behavior is this?
The current situation is a state of affairs I hate so much.
The person who did wrong is someone else, yet the person who should be receiving the apology is the one apologizing.
Narim is apologizing for something that happened because I didn't explain well.
"I'm sorry."
No matter that this isn't Earth and it's clearly a world where hierarchies exist, I cannot accept it.
I got up from the bed and approached the trembling Narim.
As I approached, her body trembled even more, which made me feel bad.
No matter what, the person in front of me right now is a human who came from the same Korea as me.
At least I don't want to scare someone from the same hometown like this.
I hugged the trembling Narim.
"I'm sorry. It was my fault, I must have become sensitive without realizing it."
"Thank goodness."
Amber, who had been restless by my side, let out a sigh of relief upon seeing me come to my senses.
"Queen."
Sensing the commotion, Stacey, who was in the next room, trotted over to me.
"Are you okay?"
I gazed at Stacey.
"...?"
Stacey tilted her head, wondering why I was looking at her.
I knelt down in front of Stacey.
I touched Stacey's body here and there.
A small physique of a 10-year-old.
And a thought suddenly occurred to me.
If one has a small body, wouldn't it require less energy?
Even if there's a child who eats well, compared to the amount an adult eats, there would be a big difference.
In other words, a small body needs less energy.
If so, if I had a small body, wouldn't I need less energy than now, and therefore feel fewer impulses?
Changing suddenly from an adult body to a small body makes no sense in human terms.
But I am not human.
I looked at Stacey's body and then at my own.
Large breasts, perfect pelvis, slender waist.
It's a perfect figure that's hard to see even on Earth. If a woman like this had passed by on Earth, I would have followed her with my gaze without realizing it.
But right now, this body. It's quite uncomfortable.
Unless there's a special occasion, there's no need to be in this body.
I have no intention of seducing men, nor do I want to get pregnant with a Creature.
Ah, I am thinking, Maybe later, really later, I'll try it?
Because even Gwen gave birth to an incredible child like Stacey, so I am curious about how strong a Creature would be if I, who possesses both Mana and Holy Power, were to give birth to one.
However, having seen the scene when Gwen gave birth to Stacey right in front of my eyes, I was a little scared, so I put that thought aside.
Anyway, I am not human right now.
Just like when I attacked Narim earlier, my body is not a human body.
Even if I were to pull my arm off right now, it wouldn't be blood that comes out, but a Creature.
That means my body isn't actually fixed. It's just that I was used to and comfortable with this body, so I didn't think much of it.
Perhaps the appearance of the previous Queen was like this?
Is that why? I like this appearance too.
However, right now, it's too difficult to maintain this appearance.
My body is in a state where it has become weak enough that I need to consume humans to maintain an adult body.
I closed my eyes, stopped thinking of my body as my body, perceived it as a Creature, and commanded it to shrink as if giving an order to a Creature.
"Huh?"
"Huh-huh-huh-huh?"
"Huh!?"
Slowly and little by little, my body shrank, and the impulse decreased accordingly.
==
It took some time for Amber to realize that the child in front of her was Lea.
The black hair that seemed to absorb even light, the reverse eyes, and the black dress all proved that she was the Creature Queen, but as her already pretty face became younger, it turned into cuteness.
Stacey is also a quite cute child, but there are many things that reveal she is a Creature.
The sticky, black skin of a Mimic Creature, sharp teeth, a long tongue, and a creepy face.
However, the child in front of her now looked like nothing but a cute child, except for the reverse eyes.
