Banquet (1)
Was she okay? Of course she was.
She had chosen a short-sleeved dress in a deep navy that complemented her dark skin, the fabric hugging her slender, healthy figure just right. Her hair was loosely tied back with a ribbon at the end of the little ponytail, and the whole look was adorable.
A few strands of pretty silver hair had slipped free to brush against her nape in a natural way that I liked even better. Strictly speaking it was a bit untidy, but that slight clumsiness only made her cuter.
As expected of a party that only recruited characters who scored high on both looks and performance in Dungeon in Evil. Not a single one of them had a flaw in the appearance department.
“You look pretty. It suits you.”
“……Y-you don’t have to force yourself to say it suits me… Someone like me doesn’t deserve…”
“I’m not forcing anything…”
I didn’t think I’d been that fake about it.
“It really does suit you.”
“……Really?”
“Yeah.”
The Thief broke into a bashful little smile. Letisia, standing beside her, chimed in as well.
“You’re plenty cute, Thief.”
“……Thanks. You’re pretty too, Letisia.”
A warm little scene of mutual compliments. But depending on my choice, these same girls might soon be shedding tears of blood.
Just imagining it felt pretty…
…thrilling.
It was a bit like the vicarious thrill of crushing someone stronger than yourself.
“Oh, by the way, Letisia.”
“Yes?”
“What did you do with your ears?”
“Ah, these?”
Letisia glanced around, then lightly tapped the side of her head. Instantly the cat ears that had been completely invisible sprang up, twitching.
“I hid them with magic for a little while.”
“Aha…”
So that worked too.
Well, of course… Magical disguises showed up all the time in comics and novels. Hiding a pair of ears would be nothing.
While we waited for the next person, another figure emerged. The moment we saw her, Letisia, the Thief, and I all broke out in cold sweat.
“Fufu, how do I look, Allen?”
Pretty or not wasn’t even the issue anymore. What Freya had walked out in was a dress that barely, barely covered the center of her enormous chest… Forget it. It was the kind of thing a prostitute would wear.
My evaluation of that sight was simple.
“You damn pervert!”
“P-pervert…!?”
Freya looked flustered. Fair enough after being called a pervert… but I’d actually softened it from the “crazy bitch” that had almost slipped out.
“How can you say something like that to me, Allen!”
Freya protested that it was a bit much, yet Letisia and the Thief standing beside her sided with me instead of her.
“Freya, that’s overdoing it…”
“……Yeah.”
“E-even you two…!”
“You’re the Saintess. What do you think the Church would say if they saw that?”
Even if the Church of Vita looked the other way when Freya customized her saintess robes into something skimpy, there was no way they would tolerate this.
Freya had no answer for that and simply averted her eyes a little. I told her to hurry up and change.
“Treat your body with a little more care. You want to become entertainment for every guy who walks by?”
“E-entertainment…? Hnn, that might not be so bad……”
…Crazy exhibitionist. I’d accidentally given her the perfect scenario.
“Just go change already. Think about the rest of us standing here with you.”
“…But you actually like it too, don’t you, Allen? Isn’t it nice for the eyes?”
“……No.”
Absolutely not.
“Hiiing…”
Freya went back in to pick something else.
I’d been enjoying two normal, pretty outfits in a row, and then Freya had to come along and smash the mood to pieces.
Still, Erinn and Ser-Aria would probably come out dressed normally… or so I thought, until Ser-Aria stepped out of the fitting room and I could only tilt my head in pure disbelief.
“How’s this, Allen!”
“…You’re seriously going to wear that?”
“Yup!”
The dress Ser-Aria had chosen… wasn’t ethically problematic like Freya’s, and it wouldn’t make the rest of us uncomfortable either.
“…It doesn’t suit you.”
“Ehk.”
It was just painfully gaudy. She had walked out in a gold dress so shiny it looked like someone had slapped gold leaf all over it. Under the banquet hall lights it would probably blind people.
What is this, golden armor…?
I might not know much about women’s dresses, but even I could pick better than that. At the very least I wouldn’t pick that.
“I was thinking of the kind of dresses I used to wear when I was little…”
“You wore stuff like that as a kid…?”
Did elves just have different tastes?
“Elven fashion sense is a little unique, isn’t it…?”
“…Not all of us.”
Ah, right. We had an elf right here.
“Does it really not suit me?”
She asked again, unable to believe it. Letisia let out a small sigh.
“I’ll help you a bit. Go pick something else.”
“O-okay…”
Ser-Aria answered in a voice that sounded thoroughly shocked.
“My aesthetic sense was this bad…?”
…We hadn’t known either.
The clothes she normally wore suited her perfectly and gave off a proper archer vibe. Apparently even royalty could struggle with formal dresses.
While Ser-Aria went back in with Letisia’s help, Freya—who had been sent packing earlier—reappeared.
“Is this better?”
It was far more acceptable than before. That level of exposure was normal for any dress. Still, compared to Letisia or the Thief it felt a touch excessive. And…
“…Do you really have to show that much leg?”
“You want me to hide my pretty legs?”
“…Do whatever you want.”
At least she wasn’t wearing the previous disaster.
“So? How do I look? Does it suit me?”
I looked properly this time, ignoring the exposure. When the base model was this pretty, anything looked good on her. Especially that rare white hair paired with ash-gray eyes—it was incredibly striking.
She had chosen a pure white dress befitting a saintess… With her skin and hair already so white, I had thought another layer of white would clash, but that just made me the idiot.
All that white actually worked perfectly. The lightly fluttering dress even gave her an angelic air.
“Yeah, it suits you.”
“The earlier dress was pretty too…”
“…No it wasn’t.”
“I’m changed!”
Ser-Aria came out again in a flash. She had ditched the glittering gold monstrosity for a soft lavender dress. It suited her just fine.
She was pretty enough that almost anything would look good on her… the previous one had simply been that bad. If she had actually worn it, every person she met would have laughed.
“Yeah, much better.”
“Aww, you can be honest! This Noonim is so pretty you can’t take your eyes off her, right?”
“Uh… sure.”
“That reaction’s lukewarm, Allen!”
She was pretty, no question, but honestly she didn’t know how to dress herself up, so she didn’t stand out as much. The person who knows what suits them best is usually themselves—maybe it was because someone else had picked it for her.
Letisia and Freya, who knew how to style themselves, and the Thief, who played to her own strengths, simply drew the eye more.
“You don’t get to see beauties like us every day, Allen.”
…Apparently calling yourself a beauty out loud wasn’t embarrassing for her. Having never lived as a good-looking person, I couldn’t relate.
“Erinn’s taking a while.”
“She did go in last.”
“But Freya and Aria already changed once and came back out.”
True. What was she doing in there?
“Should I ask?”
“Wouldn’t it be better to leave her alone?”
“Just in case something’s wrong. I’ll only knock.”
I stood and headed for the fitting room Erinn had entered. Just as I raised my hand to knock, the door slammed open.
“Aaack!!”
“Hmm? What’s this~? Why are you standing there~?”
Erinn’s cocky voice floated out.
Could she open a door a little more carefully? I clutched my throbbing nose.
“Hey, open it carefully!”
“Pfft♡ You’ve got a Rudolph nose now~♡”
“And whose fault do you think that is……”
Even while teasing me she was still at it. Irritated, I forced the pain down and dropped my hand—only to freeze mid-sentence.
“…….”
The other party members had all been pretty. That much was true.
So why…
The moment I saw that damn mesugaki hero all dressed up, my brain went blank.
Ah…
This was probably… not me, but the original Allen who had spent so much time close to her. His body was remembering the reaction.
Erinn had taken her time and emerged looking beautiful. She had undone the twin-tails she usually wore and let her long hair cascade down, adding soft curls at the ends. It was almost artfully done.
Amethyst earrings that matched her violet eyes, and her platinum-blonde hair—already shiny on a normal day—now gleamed even more brilliantly, as if she had dusted it with something.
The black dress she wore should have felt gloomy and out of place, yet it only made that radiant hair stand out more. More than anything, it softened the usual tomboyish energy into something calmer.
Layered over the composed way she had faced the queen earlier, the look suited her astonishingly well. I never would have imagined it from her everyday self…
“Heojeop~♡”
“……Huh?”
“Where are you looking~? Your eyes are so dirty~♡”
“Y-you told me to evaluate. So I’m looking.”
I absolutely had not been entranced.
“Pfft♡”
Erinn giggled and said,
“Alright then, let’s hear the results~?”
She brushed past me. As she did, a scent—perfume, maybe—drifted across my nose.
……What is that scent?
I had no idea what it was, yet it felt deeply familiar.
Familiar… and nostalgic. Another memory belonging to this body rather than me, maybe.
Why would she…?
Why spray a scent that “Allen” would remember? The question had just formed when Erinn asked,
“With your pathetic Heojeop sense of style, who’s number one~?”
At her question the other party members looked at me with faint tension.
“…….”
I was stuck.
First, second, third, fourth, fifth.
The ranking I gave would decide how much operating funds each of them received going forward. If it were just about handing out money I could rank them easily.
But what if the ones who placed low started resenting me? People were sensitive about being told they were pretty or handsome. They were just as sensitive about being told they weren’t.
“…Joint first place?”
The moment I said it, every face stiffened a little.
“You’re kidding, right?”
“Allen, that takes all the fun out of it.”
…Guess that wasn’t the answer.
“…This is just based on right now. It’s not what I usually think.”
“Yes, we know.”
“I won’t hold it against you, so just say it~♡”
You’re the one I’m most worried about holding it against me…
I thought it over a bit more seriously, then sighed and spoke honestly.
“…Letisia.”
“…Yes?”
“You suit it the best.”
Her light-green eyes went round. She answered in a voice that clearly hadn’t expected this at all.
“…Me?”
“Yeah. You’re first.”
Letisia’s cheeks colored faintly.
“Th-thank you… I thought going first would put me at a disadvantage.”
“It suits you. The makeup, everything—it all works.”
I continued ranking them in a matter-of-fact tone.
“Second is the Thief.”
“…Me? R-really…?”
“Third, Freya.”
“Whew, third is still okay…”
Freya could easily have taken second if not for that earlier dress choice docking points.
I looked at the remaining two. Ser-Aria was staring at me with a desperate “please not last” expression, while Erinn…
“…Hmm.”
Didn’t look particularly shocked.
Was I deliberately ranking Erinn lower? Yes. Not out of petty revenge for all the teasing—I wasn’t that small.
It was simply… I couldn’t evaluate her objectively right now.
This body had spent more than a decade as her childhood friend. Seeing her dressed up this prettily forced a reaction whether I wanted one or not. Objectivity was impossible.
Still, she clearly suited it better than Ser-Aria…
“Fourth, Erinn. Fifth, Aria.”
“A-Allen…!! Reconsider just once more!!!”
“You lost a lot of points for that earlier dress.”
“Nooo! This Noonim cannot accept this!!”
“No take-backs.”
With the evaluation finished, I turned away.
“I need to get ready too, so I’m heading out first.”
“Ah, see you in a bit.”
“Yeah.”
“A-Allen——!!”
Leaving Ser-Aria’s wail behind me, I stepped out of the dress room.
Erinn blinked a few times, then looked down at herself. The hair she had styled entirely on her own—after shooing away the maids who offered to help—caught her eye.
It wasn’t that the maids were unskilled. Erinn had simply wanted to do it herself. She had wanted to recreate the exact style someone liked.
Hoping that seeing it might stir even a fragment of old memories.
“M-my allowance…!”
“Aaaah! I lost to Letisia.”
“…I’m jealous.”
“I just got lucky.”
Letisia’s faintly flushed cheeks as she said that stuck in Erinn’s vision. She turned her head slightly and muttered,
“…Idiot dummy.”