The Porter Takes Command

I was mounted on a horse. Why would a porter like me even show up on a battlefield riding a horse he couldn't control?

"Saying unnecessary things…."

General Grinaldo had adopted my suggestion as the official plan of operations, and thanks to that I was actually put in command of a hero's party. Not just ours—Orlando's party as well.

As the architect of the plan, the general wanted me controlling the parties' movements too. "You've already got the best way to move them mapped out in that head of yours, don't you?" he'd said.

So the fine details of command would fall to Orlando, while I handled the overall orders.

Sure, I'd offered the plan, and yes, I knew how to move efficiently the way General Grinaldo did… but was it really okay to hand this kind of responsibility to a porter? Was this right?

I was staring blankly up at the sky in sheer disbelief when someone rode up beside me. Sunlight glittering off golden hair told me exactly who it was in an instant.

"Look who it is—the scrub who makes girls smaller than him do all the dangerous work~♡"

Erinn.

"…You agreed to this too, didn't you? You said I was the commander."

"Pfft♡ I never said I wouldn't~?"

"But seriously. I said it, yeah… is this really something I should be handling? Especially since I don't even know how Hero Orlando's party fights."

"Well~ They're splitting off halfway anyway, so who cares~?"

Our party was taking the Canal. Orlando's party would punch through the monsters instead. They would escort us as far as the foothills of Les Blanc Mountain; from there we would drive straight to the Canal and shut it down. That was the core of the operation.

So yes—we'd part ways with Orlando's party midway.

"…Erinn."

"Yeees~?"

"What were you thinking, calling me the commander?"

"…Pfft♡ You think I'd trust a commander with intelligence this scrub-tier~? You're the one who said you wanted to try commanding♡"

I had said that. But that was…

"That was back in the Lizard Lord dungeon."

"Keep doing it ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠from now on~."

"What?"

"I'm too busy fighting to read every party member's movements and give orders, you know~? So the scrub who does nothing should at least handle that role, don't you think~♡"

Erinn said it with a laugh and spurred her horse ahead.

…Huh.

Wasn't that her saying she'd trust my command from now on? The Lizard Lord dungeon must have left more of an impression than I'd thought.

"Guess I've been recognized as somewhat useful…."

"……What are you talking about?"

"…?!"

The sudden voice made me jump. The thief was right there, tilting her head as she looked at me.

…Please make some noise when you walk around.

I calmed my startled heart and answered.

"Erinn told me to take command from now on."

"……Yeah. I think that's good."

"Good?"

"……Ah… sorry. Whether I like it or not isn't what matters…."

"N-no, that wasn't what I meant. I was just wondering if you were okay with me commanding too. Do you like the idea, Thief?"

I rephrased carefully so she wouldn't misunderstand. She gave a small nod.

"……Yeah."

"…Really?"

Then that was a relief.

The thief hopped back onto her horse and settled in front of me. An unavoidable choice—I couldn't ride on my own.

"Allen, don't just sit there—get down!"

"Hm?"

"It's safer if you ride behind Freya. Switch over."

Ah.

She was right. Riding behind the thief might hinder her agility, but Freya was basically a walking barrier….

"Thanks, Thief."

"……It's nothing."

I dismounted and approached Freya. She smiled gently.

"Climb on, Allen."

"……Yeah."

The exposure was way too much… there was nowhere safe to look.

I kept my eyes fixed on the horse's rump as I mounted. Freya tapped her own waist.

"Hold on tight. We'll be riding very fast—if you don't grip firmly, you'll fall off, you know?"

"…I'll grab on when we start."

"Alright then."

I couldn't do it right now. Her entire bare back was on full display; I couldn't even look forward.

It was a force majeure situation, but if I kept staring these girls would definitely start saying things again….

"Allen."

Orlando rode up beside us. He was mounted as well, and our eye levels were roughly the same.

"I must admit I was surprised. You know a great deal. Clearly no ordinary porter."

"…I'm not. Just a regular porter."

"How modest. Well then—I'll be counting on you this time."

"Yes…."

Orlando rode off after that. Watching him go, I asked Freya,

"Freya."

"Yes?"

"What kind of person is Hero Orlando…?"

"Hmm. As I mentioned earlier, he's mild-mannered and generous. Everyone knows that isn't an act. However…."

"However?"

Freya continued.

"His eye for companions doesn't seem particularly good."

"What do you mean?"

"When choosing party members, he seems to care only about skill—perhaps because he believes he can control them—and pays little attention to character. Or maybe he simply thinks obedience is enough. I'm not sure."

…Aren't you guys the same?

But Freya's next words forced me to revise that thought.

"Sir Barg has a history of assaulting and violating women who catch his fancy on multiple occasions. As a northern barbarian, his strength is overwhelming; most women can't even resist."

"……Huh?"

"Sir Kael secretly kills anyone he dislikes and leaves no evidence, so he's escaped punishment many times for lack of proof. The frequency is far too high for it to be mere coincidence… it's essentially accepted that Kael is the culprit. Yet no one can reprimand him. He's Hero Orlando's companion, after all."

I'd already figured Kael was trouble. But did that mean the woman named Erwin was problematic too? She looked perfectly normal and kind on the surface….

"……What about Erwin?"

"Lady Erwin is famous for conducting magical experiments on the poor and powerless. Those studies are probably what earned her the moniker of White Mage."

Freya let out a soft sigh.

"Orlando seems to be keeping them in check for now—none of the three are acting up—but I wouldn't call that genuine remorse."

This was on another level. I almost felt bad for comparing them earlier. They hadn't looked it, but this was a full-blown party of ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠moral disasters?

…You really can't judge a criminal by their face. That saying hits hard.

"Is that even allowed for a hero's party…?"

"It's precisely because they're a hero's party that it's possible. They're granted immunity in many respects. If another hero's party existed in the kingdom to keep them in check it might be different, but the Estire Kingdom has only Orlando's party—just like us."

"…So you guys have immunity too?"

"We don't do anything that severe, do we?"

True… but your mental illnesses are severe.

Even now. With a man sitting right behind her, this exhibitionist made no effort to cover her completely bare back. It wasn't modest exposure—it was a deep plunge that was downright extreme.

"Freya."

"Yes?"

"Can't you at least put something over that?"

"Then my pretty back would be completely covered."

That's the point of giving you something, you exhibitionist freak!

"Even if it's Allen's request, I can't do that."

"……Fine."

And she still called herself a maiden after this? Unbelievable.

Just then General Grinaldo approached.

"Commander Allen, we will be departing shortly."

"…Ah, yes."

Being called "Commander" felt incredibly awkward. The last time I'd felt this out of place was transferring schools mid-semester, when everyone else already knew each other and I was the only new face.

I must have looked a little dubious, because General Grinaldo spoke again.

"There is no need to doubt your own ability. I am not so foolish as to appoint someone without capability as commander."

He continued,

"You are the commander and the architect of this operation. Make full use of the hero parties according to that plan. All responsibility rests with me for appointing you—so do not worry."

"…Understood."

I bowed my head.

"Thank you."

"No need for thanks. If the operation succeeds, I will return the gratitude to you."

With that, General Grinaldo turned his horse toward the head of the army. He looked over the soldiers and raised his voice.

"Brave children of Estire! From this moment we reclaim our homeland from those vile monsters! Though our strength may seem powerless before such mighty evil, the stars themselves have granted us the power to overcome it!"

Raising morale was a commander's duty, and General Grinaldo fulfilled it thoroughly—by leveraging the superhumans known as heroes.

"The judgment of the stars shall cast down evil! I bestow upon you the glory of following that noble pilgrimage! Raise your weapons, all of you!!"

The soldiers thrust their weapons high and answered as one.

"Destroy the evil!!"

At the same moment as the soldiers' cry, Erinn lightly shook her reins.

"Let's go see the ugly ones who look just like the scrub~♡"

…I don't look like them.

Just as they were about to cross the Sierjuri River, Kael approached Orlando.

"Orlando."

"What is it, Kael?"

"Are you seriously handing command over to that porter bastard?"

Kael pressed on.

"Hey, Orlando. Even if we're a new party, we've been around longer than theirs, and we'll hit our second year soon. Yet you're going to listen to a party that hasn't even been together a full year—and a porter's words at that?"

Kael shook his head.

"This is a matter of pride!"

"…He was smarter than I expected. This plan certainly has a higher chance of success than Staff Officer Rosero's."

Orlando's lukewarm response made Kael heave a deep sigh.

"Ha, I don't get it. Listening to some porter bastard…."

"However, Kael—I have no intention of entrusting command as you fear."

"…What?"

"I will make the judgments. All of you need only trust my decisions and follow."

Hearing that, Kael said nothing more. At least if they moved under Orlando's judgment, it was as good as accepting Kael's demand to a degree.

"…Fine."

Once Kael fell back, Orlando raised his flag high. He turned toward Allen, who held overall command, and spoke.

"I will open the path."

"Yes. I'll leave it to you."

Vast magic power erupted from the Holy Flag. It settled upon the party members following him and the paladins who would help open the path.

That was why Orlando's party had no cleric. Since Orlando himself could handle the party's buffs, a priest simply wasn't necessary.

Orlando leveled the flag forward with crisp precision.

"All forces—charge!!"

"Uwaaaaaah!!!!"

Orlando, his party members, and the paladins broke into a run. Erinn watched them, then looked at Allen.

"Should we stick right behind them~?"

"Yeah. We should."

The plan was to trail Orlando's party and race straight down the path they cleared. Riding through the monsters at a gallop, we could reach the Canal from here in a single day.

Even if things got a little tangled, we'd arrive the next day at latest.

"Then hold on tight, Allen."

"……Alright."

Allen took a deep breath and wrapped his arms around Freya's waist—then flinched hard.

Unlike when he'd held the thief's waist, the sensation was far softer. It wasn't belly fat or side flesh. The softness pressed only against the upper part of his arms.

As the horse began to run, that softness pressed in, then slipped away… touching and releasing as if swaying.

Don't tell me…

Realizing what the soft mass was, Allen was thoroughly flustered. Freya's divine-power pouches—overwhelming even within the party—were brushing against him.

Freya herself had to know, yet she didn't seem to care in the slightest. Or perhaps she did care and was simply pretending not to.

Crazy pervert…

Allen was so dumbfounded he almost yanked his hands away.

…Get a grip.

He barely managed to cling to the thread of reason. This was no time to sink into filthy desire. As the one entrusted with command of the operation, he had to fulfill his role.

The moment Orlando and his party crossed the Sierjuri River and set foot in the wheat region, monsters revealed themselves at once.

"Kyaaaaak──!!"

"Humans! Kieeek, stop the humans!"

The monsters that appeared were every shape and size—from tiny goblins to massive growly bears. It might as well have been a monster coalition army.

"Follow closely!"

Orlando thrust his magic-charged flag forward.

KWAANG!!!

Magic erupted from the thrust flag and punched straight through the monsters ahead. At the same time, Orlando's vanguard—Barg—swung forearm-thick axes in whirling arcs as he charged.

KWAJIK! KWAAK!!

"Kieeek!!"

Axes swinging freely split monster skulls, and the opposite hand's axe immediately tore the next one apart. The fluid, dance-like chain of blows left Allen honestly impressed.

His skill is the real deal.

They were clearly superior partners to the NPCs who appeared in the original Dungeon in Evil. Allen relaxed, thinking the operation would proceed smoothly.

That was when it happened.

"Everyone dodge!! It's basilisk venom!!"

Chwaak! Pssshhk!

Giant snakes with scales hard as stone—basilisks—revealed themselves. And that wasn't all.

Shaaaaa──.

Enormous spider monsters whose bite force could shatter steel in a single strike—arachnes—appeared as well.

The moment higher-tier monsters showed themselves, Allen issued an order at once.

"Hero Orlando, please hold the basilisks!"

"Understood!"

Orlando had been planning to do exactly that and charged forward with his flag.

"Follow me!"

"Hero Orlando must go alone! The rest of your party needs to hold the other monsters! The arachnes and—!"

"…Hiyah!"

Allen had given the order after judging Orlando's specs sufficient to handle the basilisks solo. But Orlando spurred his horse without any verbal agreement, and as a result his party members….

"…!"

Followed right behind him.

"Eeh? Where are you going?"

"W-wait… Allen just ordered you to hold the other monsters, didn't he!?"

With Hero Orlando and his entire party piled on, the basilisks were cleaned up in an instant—but the gap left by their departure let the enemy surge through.

Especially the smaller monsters, who began darting through the openings between the paladins. Letisia swiftly drew her whip.

"I'll hold them."

With her chant, Letisia's four great spirits appeared in an instant. The summoned spirits immediately dealt with the approaching monsters.

"Kyahaha♥ Trash like you dare come near me!"

Letisia's quick response bought Allen a moment to breathe. He shouted,

"Where are you going!? Come back!"

Allen called urgently for Orlando, but the man had already finished the earlier basilisks and was now handling the approaching arachnes as well.

Still… not the worst outcome?

Orlando had at least dealt with the higher-tier monsters that were the original goal, so that much was fine—but then he went a step further and made an independent call.

"We'll draw the attention of the strong monsters! The remaining lower-tier ones can be handled by the paladins alone!"

"What? No, there's no need for that! We only need to maintain the front line…!"

But Orlando and his party were already racing far ahead toward the higher-tier monsters. Allen clapped a hand to his forehead.

Of course they wouldn't listen to a porter bastard…!

No matter how grand a title like "commander" they gave him, the porter treatment never changed. If only lower-tier monsters came, the paladins alone could handle them—but the real problem was that the speed of opening the path would slow down.

"Allen, what should we do?"

At Freya's question, Allen first assessed the situation. Orlando's party had broken formation, yet they weren't completely abandoning the role they'd claimed for themselves.

They had split into pairs on either side and were dealing with higher-tier threats like basilisks, arachnes, and hell hounds. In the process they were also cutting down everything that blocked their way.

Because they'd left the line, miscellaneous monsters were pouring in like a flood… but it wasn't as if there was no solution.

These were monsters the paladins could handle. That meant their stamina and defense were low—and they would be helpless before overwhelming firepower.

"Erinn!!"

"Yeees~?"

"Not 'yeees'—you already know!"

"I won't know unless you tell me~♡"

"Damn it, open a path!! We're going to punch through in one go!"

"We're not holding formation~?"

Allen nodded at Erinn's question.

"Those bastards are doing whatever they want, so there's no point!"

"Calling them bastards—if they hear you you're in big trouble~?"

"Like I care!"

"Pfft♡"

Erinn drew her sword. The blade sliding free of its scabbard shone with brilliant light.

"How~? How hard should I hit~?"

"The strongest you've got!!"

"Really~?"

Erinn smirked.

"You said it~♡"

Allen saw the message that floated up before his eyes and panicked.

"……Warning?"

A warning message. No boss monster or anything had appeared, yet—

The light held by Erinn's Holy Sword went beyond brilliance and began to shine so fiercely it hurt the eyes. Seeing it, Freya wore a slightly troubled smile.

"Allen, ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠hold on tight."

"Huh?"

Freya gripped the reins firmly and said,

"Otherwise you'll go flying."

"What do you mean…."

Allen glanced at Erinn for a moment—and flinched hard. He had checked her status.

"Where did all her magic stat go…."

The instant Allen muttered to himself, the Holy Sword that had been shining eye-searingly bright suddenly went quiet. Erinn gripped it in both hands and leapt down from her horse.

And then—

"Die♡"

She brought the Holy Sword down vertically with all her strength.

ZZZEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK!!!!!!!!!

A slash of light ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠erased everything that lay in a straight line. The range of the slash was wider than expected; the beam of light punched past right beside Orlando and his party members.

"…Erinn?"

"Huh, what is this…… uwaaagh!?"

"Kyaaaah!"

"…What the hell is this now!?!"

Of course Erinn had swung after checking their positions, so it never actually touched them. The problem was that the shockwave alone nearly sent Orlando's hero party flying.

Insane…!

And Allen was no different. Even if he hadn't wanted to hold Freya's waist, he had no choice but to cling on for dear life. If he hadn't, he might have been thrown and become a corpse.

"Hnn, Allen. You're holding too tight…."

"Don't make weird noises, please!"

The aftershock lasted a long while; nearly a full minute passed before it finally subsided. Only then could Allen release Freya's waist.

"You can keep holding a little longer, you know."

"…Shut up."

Allen looked ahead—and couldn't hold back the dry laugh that escaped on its own.

"Hah."

With a single slash, the path all the way to Les Blanc Mountain—where the Canal waited—had been blasted wide open. Even the most ferocious monsters couldn't immediately recover their wits and swarm after witnessing that.

"I did it just like the scrub said~♡"

Allen realized something.

I want power like that too….

In the face of overwhelming force, no amount of clever scheming meant much at all.