[The Magic of Foxtail Grass]
Foxtail grass growing in a field is enchanted. Even though it’s just a weed, when it sways in the breeze, it inexplicably puts the viewer in a good mood. They say it’s like looking at a small child nodding their head without a single worry in the world.
“Is that the kind of thought you live by, Ishikawa? Wow, Peter Pan Syndrome.”
“You… were the one who… asked…!”
“Welcome, Ishikawa, the guy who thinks foxtail grass is a wizard.”
While walking to school with that idiot Ishikawa, he suddenly crouched down, and I wondered what was up. I was curious if he was suddenly taking a dump, but he was just staring at the foxtail grass. When I asked him about it, that was the answer I got.
“Isn’t it cute…?”
“Hmm. How about you try living with thoughts like this instead?”
So this is what fills the head of a romantic comedy protagonist. It’s a more interesting delusion than I thought, but it felt like he had foxtail grass stuck in his brain. How about living with slightly more realistic concerns than that, Ishikawa?
“For example, like how I’m too lazy to make breakfast tomorrow morning, so I need a way to mooch a burger off a friend.”
Slurp, that was a realistic concern that made my mouth water. Don’t you think so too, Ishikawa? You’re going to buy me a burger, right?
“You! That’s aimed at me, isn’t it?! Buy it with your own money!”
Tsk, this is why the quick-witted Ishikawa is useless. Anyway, how about living with realistic thoughts like these? We’re just high schoolers living ordinary lives. Especially since you can’t even get a some (flirting stage) going, aren’t you disqualified from being a rom-com protagonist?
I was about to say that to Ishikawa, when...
Buzz-
My pocket vibrated. Since Ishikawa has spent enough time with me, he immediately realized this wasn’t a game notification. Please don’t look at me with those eyes, Ishikawa. Why, am I not allowed to get messages? Huh?
“Who is it?”
“I have never thought of you as a girlfriend, Ishikawa.”
“No! Even if it’s not a girlfriend, can’t I be curious!?”
I laughed once at Ishikawa, whose reactions are always spot-on. Swipe. I opened my phone to check who the sender of the notification was. And I realized that I was the one in the most abnormal situation, not anyone else.
“………”
Did I just smile contentedly while reading a text message? What kind of person is this senior, anyway?
“Jun, are you perhaps still… in contact with that senior from the other day?”
What’s with the “still,” Ishikawa?
“No, you…… were you able to talk to women?”
“You were the one who called me a dating expert and whatnot with your own mouth.”
“The ability to create couples is different from the ability to become one…?”
Oh, so you’re saying you want to die today, huh? When you should be wishing for my happiness, this bastard.
‘…Phew, ignore Ishikawa.’
I recalled the things I had experienced so far. It had been a week since I unexpectedly became close with Suo, and nothing much had happened in the meantime. At least, offline.
Online, in text messages, a lot of conversations had been exchanged. Suo Mitsurugi. People usually have a side that follows their appearance. People who look aloof are actually aloof, and people who look cute are actually cute to everyone, so they follow a cute way of speaking. In that sense, Suo was someone whose face made it hard to even approach her. Her smile is pretty, but she looked like the type who would trigger a cliché like, ‘I’m annoyed. Could you not talk to me?’ if you tried to strike up a conversation.
But what is this senior, anyway?
Is it okay for her to be this cute? ‘It’s truly dizzying.’ Because we were talking via text, I was currently accumulating a lot of misunderstandings and delusions. That was especially true since you can’t read emotions through text. It seems my personality itself is one that easily accumulates misunderstandings……. Hmm. ‘Oh, my head.’ I fell into a dilemma. What kind of person is this senior? And from my perspective, not having my brain pickled by rom-com tropes, only one thing… came to mind.
“Ishikawa, what does it feel like to be a fish trapped in a fishing pond?”
“…Uh, stifling. And lonely, I guess?”
That’s obvious. Sigh, I guess there’s no answer even if I think about it.
“Then what about a goldfish trapped in a fishbowl?”
“Same… I guess? No, wait, wouldn’t the goldfish be fine? Since they’re stupid and forget things quickly.”
“Are you calling me stupid right now? Look at this Ishikawa.”
“What…! No, I wasn’t talking about you…… Wait! ‘Look at this Ishikawa’? What does that mean!”
Ignoring Ishikawa, who had started having a seizure, I thought about it. I’m not a doctor, but if I do a little self-diagnosis, I have a slight case of megalomania. Or maybe a lot. Maybe it’s because I’ve never seen a senior like this in my life. ‘Suo Mitsurugi… she’s so bright I don’t know what she is.’ It’s true that Suo is exceptionally active. Also, it’s true that I’m weak to high-tension women because I hang out with a gloomy bastard like Ishikawa.
“You… have a look on your face that suggests you’re thinking of something very rude.”
Shut up, Ishikawa. Are you reading my mind or something? Where would you find a rom-com protagonist like that? I’m busy thinking about Suo right now, Ishikawa.
‘Honestly, I like that it’s Suo.’
But, honestly, I am suspicious. ‘There’s a saying in Korea.’ If a pretty woman shows interest in you, it’s not your appearance, it’s your organs— on the last day of the date, if you go to a motel, guys from the criminal underworld are waiting for you……. Maybe because I heard stories like that, I was a little scared. Suo wouldn’t do that, but I was worried about what would happen if she treated me like a goldfish in a fishing pond, or something similar. The affection I feel for her right now is weak, but it exists. Rather, because of that small affection, I felt like I’d feel like absolute crap if I got hurt.
“Sigh, Ishikawa… life is suffering.”
“Did you suddenly become a philosopher…? Hmm, life is certainly like that.”
“You saying that makes it even more painful.”
“Why…….”
And such worries stopped at the school gate. Because the student guidance teacher was energetically swinging his club and disciplining students again today.
“Sigh…….”
In the end, I went to school today, and as usual, I turned on my game. Is Suo only affectionate to me? Or does she feel this way to everyone else? How did I end up starting this kind of worry?
“Hey Jun! Aren’t you putting your phone away!?”
Hahaha- Phew, no matter what I worry about, the day begins again today. Slowly and even more slowly.
And then, an unexpected incident suddenly broke out. It was because the beauty who lived on the front lines of our class suddenly approached me. Me, who sat in the corner by the window at the very back of the classroom.
“Excuse me.”
Ruri Mitsune, Ishikawa’s crush, had come.
“Yamada-san, do you have a moment?”
To think she’d use a formal tone even with a classmate. I know this is a cliché, but still. To have someone I’ve never even talked to approach me with formal speech. I felt inexplicably disappointed. I didn’t want to use formal speech back, so I decided to answer normally.
“Yeah, what is it?”
“…It’s nothing else, I just have something I’d like to consult you about.”
Murmur, murmur……. No, you bastards, you didn’t even pay attention to me until now, so stop murmuring in shock all of a sudden. She just said it’s a consultation. Where is there any room for misunderstanding…….
“…If possible, it’s a bit difficult here. Could you step out for a moment?”
Can I…? The moment the udon noodles in my brain started having a seizure from the absurdity. After Ruri glanced around, she said to me.
“It’s an important, matter….”
And at that moment, because I could read her emotions, all my tension melted away. What, you scared me for nothing.
“Sure.”
“……Thank you.”
Ishikawa, don’t look at me with that expression. She just glanced at you a moment ago, and a light pink aura is spreading all around her. Ishikawa, you crazy bastard. You seduced a girl like this? Alright, prepare to be robbed of 200 burgers today.
I went up the stairs and opened the iron door to find a wide-open rooftop. As I closed the rooftop door, Mitsune opened her mouth.
“I talked to Ishikawa-kun a little bit. And…… I heard that Yamada-san has a bit of a knack for romance.”
Look at this, she calls Ishikawa “Ishikawa-kun.” A very light pink is spreading everywhere. Seriously, this formal speech is so disappointing. Maybe it’s because I’m Korean. I nodded, and Ruri asked me with her lips pursed.
“By any chance, Yamada-san…… do you know… a way to know what the other person is thinking about me?”
Ruri Mitsune, the area around her, which was usually quiet because her emotions didn’t run wild, was in a flutter of chaos. The color of shyness, the color of liking someone, the color of being a little guarded. Worry? Is that mixed in too? ‘It’s hard to distinguish when there are too many colors.’ Thinking that everything was directed at Ishikawa made me as angry as 200 burgers. And, I felt proud too. ‘Ishikawa, this bastard is a truly kind bastard.’ I chewed over Ruri Mitsune’s question. With this face, couldn’t she just approach him and talk to him to judge whether he likes her or not? But Ruri was shy yet serious. And what was my role? Without having to recall it, I was in the role of giving advice during a consultation.
‘A way to know what the other person is thinking.’
Even for me, who was often told I had mind-reading powers, that was difficult. If I could read the other person’s thoughts, I would have been living a protagonist’s life, working as a diplomat or something.
“……Well.”
Let’s think a bit. This answer might have a profound impact on Ishikawa’s future love life. Thinking that, I racked my brain as much as I could. A way to know how the other person thinks of you. That’s just a normal, everyday worry. It’s light after you’ve passed your youth, but it’s a worry that feels heavy right now.
“Talk to the other person often, and spend time… so you can get to know what kind of person they are……”
But. As I was saying it…
“…If you spend time?”
I stopped talking to Ruri Mitsune for a moment, my head going blank.
“Come to think of it, that’s right. Rather than thinking about it by myself… that would be better.”
Isn’t this what’s happening to me?
“……That’s right.”
“Thank you, Yamada-san. I’ll definitely repay you later.”
“Don’t do that. It’s just, it’s fine.”
An easier way than thinking about it by myself was right in front of my eyes. Saying it from a third-party perspective made me realize. Swing it, it’s already inside you. Through Ruri Mitsune, I realized that the answer was already inside me. Suo Mitsurugi. To know if this person thinks of me as a fish in a pond, or as a friend…….
“……Are there no clouds in the sky? It’s seriously disgustingly blue.”
No, I must have become a first-year high schooler again. What am I scared of? I can just meet her in person and judge. Actually, it’s a truly useless and trivial worry… it’s not easy, though.
After Mitsune left, I worried. Let’s open my phone. There were texts from Suo.
Am I fighting a virtual Suo right now? Or is this senior really thinking of me as a friend? The day I worry about something like this has truly come. Damn it. Don’t think, just do it. I typed.
Tap-tap, tap-tap-tap.
And, I sent a text to Suo. Whoosh-
(Read)
This senior said she was going to sleep, but she read it right away. Did she see the notification while playing a game or something? For now, I started pressing the keys to send the next message. Because I was so nervous, I left out something important.
<Senior, since you have a lot of time, if we spend a little time outside, would you be…>
Ah, is it a bit much to write it like this? I’ve never said something like this before, so I’ve deleted and rewritten it a lot. Sigh, Suo would answer cheerfully anyway. Am I being too serious by myself? While I was clutching my head and deleting the sentence I was about to send.
Buzz-
A reply popped up on the screen.
“……”
5 minutes after reading. Just a short reply. However, the feeling was strange.
Blink, blink.
The sentence I was deleting is blinking. My finger that was pressing delete stopped. “Yes. I’d love to,” she said. It’s formal speech, so why does it feel different? ……… Am I starting to have delusions again? I’m seriously going crazy.