Dungeon Raid
I lost my mind for a second. I jumped off the bed and shouted at the top of my lungs. That was my reverse scale, my pride. I could never tolerate being called the Pussy Destroyer.
“... Are you yelling at me?”
Chae Suhyun’s voice dropped to a freezing temperature. The air in the room felt like it had frozen solid in an instant. This was the killing intent of an A-grade hunter.
“Ah, sorry...”
I was instantly suppressed. The other party was an A-grade hunter. A ranker, no less. I couldn’t act out. Of course, that nickname really was fucking awful. But that didn’t mean I could throw away my one and only life.
Chae Suhyun let out a short sigh.
“Haa… Fine. I’ll accept your apology. Just now… ahem. Anyway, you seemed pretty worked up, so I’ll let it slide.”
Chae Suhyun cleared her throat and averted her gaze. She must have remembered how she’d been howling like a beast underneath me just moments ago. Her face flushed slightly again. But she soon looked at me with a serious expression.
“By the way, why are you doing this kind of work?”
“What kind of work?”
“Prostitution, obviously. From what I just saw, your buff power is no joke. With that level of ability, you should’ve been able to join any number of high-ranking parties.”
“Why are you asking something so obvious?”
“Huh?”
“Ever since that goddamn nickname Pussy Destroyer appeared, no one will take me into their party.”
Resentment surged up inside me. Fuck, if it weren’t for that nickname… I’d still be pumping cum into those hot female hunters right before the boss room.
“Think about it. What’s the activation condition for my buff? It’s a creampie. I have to plant my seed inside a female hunter’s womb.”
“... Yes. That’s right.”
“But how common are parties made up of only women? They aren’t. And on top of that, there’s a rumor that if you party with me, all the women faint before you even reach the boss room. What insane party would take me?”
Chae Suhyun nodded. She seemed to understand. Fuck. That just made me feel even worse.
“So I’ve been scraping by doing porter work. But then…”
“But then?”
“Even that dried up because of that fucking Gate Click-Ejaculation Meta! The male bastards are all sticking their dicks into the gates and clearing them that way, so who the hell needs a porter anymore!”
My pent-up frustration exploded out of me.
“I was seriously about to starve to death. My bank account had three thousand won left. Buying one cup ramen would’ve ended my life.”
After hearing my long, pathetic story, Chae Suhyun’s expression grew strange. Pity. Sympathy. And a hint of guilt. I kind of wanted to milk that look a little more. But I couldn’t. Our relationship ended here. That had been the contract from the start.
I send Chae Suhyun off five times. Chae Suhyun gives me five million won. We had simply made a transaction between a male prostitute and a client who buys sex. A professional doesn’t get clingy.
... Wait, am I actually a professional?
The atmosphere in the room turned awkward. I picked up the clothes scattered across the floor and put them on one by one.
“Then please send the payment through Hunter Pay. I’ll keep everything completely confidential, so don’t worry.”
I bowed politely and turned to leave. I started walking toward the door. But at that moment—
“Wait.”
A voice called out from behind me. I turned my head. Chae Suhyun was staring straight at me, covering her body with the bedsheet.
“Pussy Destro— No, ahem. Would you raid one gate with me?”
“Huh? What gate?”
“A B-Grade Gate.”
B-grade? An A-grade hunter like Chae Suhyun wanted to take a C-grade buffer like me?
“At that rank, wouldn’t a ranker like you be able to clear it alone? Or you could just go with your party members, right?”
My question made Chae Suhyun’s expression darken.
“My party fell apart a long time ago.”
“Why?”
“Because of that damn click-ejaculation thing.”
Chae Suhyun ground her teeth.
“All three male party members turned into gate-fuckers. They just stand at the gate entrance shaking their hips every day.”
“Ah…”
“And the other female party member besides me…”
“What about her?”
“She was arrested yesterday for raping a civilian man.”
“......”
I was at a loss for words. The world had gone completely insane. Men were sticking their cocks into holes in space. Women were becoming criminals because they couldn’t control their sexual urges. If this wasn’t an apocalypse, what the hell was it?
But I couldn’t just agree without conditions. My life was precious, after all.
“What are the terms? If it’s dangerous, I absolutely won’t go.”
The standard for gate raids was a five-person party. One tank, one bruiser, one melee dealer, one ranged dealer. And one buffer or healer like me. Five people in total to maintain balance, including one rear supporter.
No matter how high-ranked and strong Chae Suhyun was as an A-grade hunter, clearing a B-grade gate with just the two of us was insane. The risk was way too high.
Chae Suhyun watched my reaction carefully as she laid out her offer.
“I’ll give you a share of the mana stone profits. And…”
“And?”
“I’ll pay you upfront an amount equivalent to what a semi-pro mercenary would receive.”
Semi-pro mercenary? The calculator in my head started spinning like crazy. How much did a semi-pro mercenary get per run? Probably… ten million won?
Ten million won. Ten million won?
I quickly pulled my pants back up.
“What are we waiting for? Let’s go right now.”
Chae Suhyun looked at me like I was ridiculous.
“Didn’t you just say you absolutely wouldn’t go if it was dangerous? You looked like you thought the conditions were plenty dangerous just a second ago?”
“Right now my wallet is in even more danger.”
“... Are you insane?”
Chae Suhyun sighed again. But that wasn’t my problem. Ten million won was worth putting my life on the line just a little. Besides, I just had to cast my buffs and hide in the back anyway.
“We’re not going right now.”
“Then when?”
“In two days. Come to the address I’ll send you. Bring your gear.”
“Understood. See you in two days, client.”
I answered energetically and left the motel room. My steps felt as light as feathers.
It happened while I was walking around the Hangang Gate area after leaving the motel. My smartphone in my pocket vibrated briefly.
Ziiing—
It was a Hunter Pay deposit notification. I turned on the screen.
20,000,000 won has been deposited from Chae Suhyun.
“... Huh?”
I stopped walking. I rubbed my eyes and counted the numbers again. What the hell? Did she send too much by mistake?
The amount we had agreed on was five million won for the sex and ten million won as the mercenary advance payment. That should have totaled fifteen million won. But an extra five million had come in.
She might ask for it back later. I quickly opened Hunter Talk.
The reply came the instant the ‘1’ disappeared.
Oh. Right. The doppelganger sex. That was Chae Suhyun’s preference. Honestly, that wasn’t even close to being a real fetish. I had just fucked her like usual. I hadn’t done anything disgusting. To get an extra five million just for that…
‘At this rate, aren’t I making more than when I was a hunter?’
I did some quick mental math. In one day, I had earned ten million won just from sex.
... I really was earning more.
No matter how good the A-grade party I belonged to had been, the only place I was useful was the boss room. My contribution against the small fry monsters had been close to zero. That’s why my share of the party profits had always been the lowest. It meant I hadn’t been making that much money. I had simply earned a lot for a C-grade hunter.
“Fuck, so I’m making more as a male prostitute than as a hunter?”
A sudden wave of self-loathing hit me. It felt like my pride as a hunter was crumbling to dust.
But at the same time, my genius brain realized one crucial fact.
‘Wait. Can’t I just do both prostitution and hunting?’
That’s right. I was good at sex and good at giving buffs. That meant I could double my income.
Fuck! Hallelujah!
“I will never fuck a gate.”
I would never shake my dick in the air like those crazy bastards.
Two days later.
“Why are you so late?”
“Haha… Sorry…”
“... We’re going in immediately, so check your equipment.”
Fuck. I was only three minutes late. But she was giving me so much attitude. And here I thought she had been using polite speech back at the motel. Suddenly she was being incredibly rude. Was she the type who acted completely different as a client versus at work?
A professional attitude that strictly separated personal and professional matters. Well, she was the one paying me, so I had to endure it.
Anyway. When I arrived at the address Chae Suhyun had given me, a massive gate was flashing with blue light. And in front of it—
“Ugh…! I’m cumming!”
“Move, fuck! It’s my turn next!”
The place was packed with crazy bastards who had their zippers down and were thrusting their hips into the gate’s rift. The male hunters these days were so obsessed with shoving their dicks in there that they couldn’t think straight. I had no idea how they could even get hard looking at that bluish, shimmering space. They were completely insane.
I followed behind Chae Suhyun, passing the gate-fuckers and heading deeper inside.
“There’s no one here?”
“This is B-grade, so they can’t fuck it.”
Ah, that’s right. The Gate Click-Ejaculation Meta only worked up to C-grade gates. With B-grade gates, you’d just end up with your dick chopped off for nothing.
I followed Chae Suhyun and entered the gate. There was a flash before my eyes, and the scenery changed.
‘Fuck, why did it have to be a cave-type dungeon?’
I looked around and sighed. Cave-type dungeons had more than a few shitty aspects. First of all, there were way too many traps. Spikes shooting up from the floor, poison arrows flying from the walls. And the environment itself was damp and humid. After clearing it, you were often soaked head to toe in sweat and moisture.
Of course, there was one good thing about it. After getting drenched in sweat, going to a motel, taking a shower, and having a round of sex felt incredibly refreshing.
Well, most of the fighting would be handled by Chae Suhyun anyway. I probably wouldn’t have to sweat much. My only job was to fuck Chae Suhyun in front of the boss room. I just had to stay hidden in the back and do my part.
I followed Chae Suhyun deeper into the cave. She suddenly stopped and—
Clap—!
She clapped her hands loudly. With an eerie sound, Chae Suhyun’s skill, Doppelganger, was summoned. It was taking her appearance again today. Was that its default form?
Together with the Chae Suhyun who had summoned the doppelganger, we resumed the raid. The doppelganger took the lead, triggering and clearing the dungeon’s traps with its own body.
Click.Click click.Click click click click click click click.
Traps activated from all directions. Spikes shot up and arrows flew, embedding themselves in the doppelganger’s body. But the doppelganger continued forward with an indifferent expression.
“... Are all dungeons this full of traps?”
“Yeah. And the number of traps increases based on how many people enter.”
“Aha. Then maybe coming with just the two of us was the right answer.”
At my words, Chae Suhyun’s steps came to an abrupt halt. She slowly turned her head and glared at me.
“... You’re speaking informally?”
“...? You’re speaking informally too… Noona?”
Fuck. Her expression was terrifying. But damn it, you started speaking casually first. When I made a face like I was being wronged, Chae Suhyun narrowed her eyes and asked,
“How old are you?”
“Twenty-one…”
“Call me Noona.”
“Huh?”
Chae Suhyun didn’t even wait for my answer before turning back to the front. She gestured to the doppelganger and ordered it to continue disabling traps.
Fuck. It wasn’t the casual speech that pissed her off. It was the title. Since she was older, she wanted me to treat her like an older sister. What a narrow-minded woman.
I was flipping her off behind her back and cursing her when the Chae Suhyun walking ahead suddenly raised a clenched fist upward. It was the stop signal. I quickly pressed myself flat against the cave wall and held my breath.
Apparently satisfied with my quick reaction, Chae Suhyun nodded. She signaled for me to keep waiting. Then she drew her dagger and dashed forward. The battle had begun. So there had been a monster up ahead.
I cautiously poked my head out to watch the fight. Chae Suhyun’s movements were pure art. She dodged attacks from every angle and landed counters on the monster’s vital points. Normally, charging in first against multiple monsters was disadvantageous. Inducing the opponent’s attacks and countering them like this was the rational approach.
As expected of an A-grade ranker. I was watching in admiration when—
Clang!Clang!Kang!
The sound of weapons clashing grew increasingly violent. And gradually, I saw Chae Suhyun being pushed back.
‘Fuck?’
I rubbed my eyes. Why was she being pushed back?! This was a B-grade dungeon! Why was an A-grade ranker getting pushed by B-grade monsters?!
I examined the situation more closely. Something strange was mixed in among the monsters. The main monster in this dungeon was the Bat-man—a bipedal giant bat humanoid. But among that pitch-black swarm, several creatures with red wings were mixed in.
‘Bloody Bat-men!’
Fuck. Mutants. Even one mutant was enough to overwhelm an entire party. Yet there were a full three of those red-winged bastards. It was a miracle Chae Suhyun had held out this long. Had she really thought she could win alone? Or had she trusted in her doppelganger?
But the doppelganger was already in no condition to fight, having been torn apart while disabling traps. This was bad. At this rate, Chae Suhyun was going to get breached. If she fell, I would be next. I needed to create a path for a quick retreat right now.
I looked around. A fist-sized rock was at my feet. I quickly picked it up. Then, with all my strength, I hurled it toward the center of the battle.
Whoosh—!
The rock smashed against the cave wall with a loud noise and shattered. The aggro had been pulled. The monsters’ movements froze for a moment. Taking that chance, Chae Suhyun quickly retreated and caught her breath.
Whew. Thank god.
... But one problem had arisen.
‘... Did I pull the aggro too well?’
The direction the rock had flown from—that is, the wall where I was hiding. Dozens of Bat-men and three Bloody Bat-men had all turned their gazes toward me. Their blood-red eyes gleamed as they locked onto me.
“...”
“......”
The atmosphere inside the cave grew heavy. I asked Chae Suhyun, half in hope.
“... Noona.”
“... Speak.”
“Am I fucked?”
“......”
Ah, fuck. Noona. Could you please answer me? They say silence is affirmation. It’s making me even more anxious.
And then—
“Kieeeeeeeeeek—!!”
With a monstrous shriek, the horde of monsters all charged toward me at once.
“You fucking son of a biiiiitch!!!”
And so. I grabbed my dick, which was trembling from the tension, and started running at full speed without looking back.