I've Become an Exam Student

I've become an exam student.

— Taehyeon Jin-in

Is there anything our child needs?

✦ Donated 10 High-Grade Spirit Stones ✦

Thank you, Taehyeon Jin-in, for 10 High-Grade Spirit Stones.

— Taebaek Geomgun

I have always thought of you as my own granddaughter, you know.

✦ Donated 10 High-Grade Spirit Stones ✦

Thank you, Taebaek Geomgun, for 10 High-Grade Spirit Stones.

— Okhan Binghu

You know full well that if this lady ever sounds plaintive, it is only ever for your sake.

✦ Donated 10 High-Grade Spirit Stones ✦

Thank you, Okhan Binghu, for 10 High-Grade Spirit Stones.

— Hyeolha Nojo

Brat! Remember you'd be dead if it weren't for the sword I gave you!

✦ Donated 10 High-Grade Spirit Stones ✦

Thank you, Hyeolha Nojo, for 10 High-Grade Spirit Stones.

— Cheongi Gakju

I am always cheering you on.

✦ Donated 10 High-Grade Spirit Stones ✦

Thank you, Cheongi Gakju, for 10 High-Grade Spirit Stones.

— Ocheong Yowang

You know I always catch your streams, right?

✦ Donated 10 High-Grade Spirit Stones ✦

Thank you, Ocheong Yowang, for 10 High-Grade Spirit Stones.

"…."

Why were the elders acting like this today?

There was something familiar ‍‍‌‌⁠⁠‌‍‍‌⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠‌‌‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠about it — a scene I'd seen on television. Nothing but kind words, like a real grandfather, a real grandmother.

No. I already knew why, didn't I. The spiritual herbs. That was it. That flower field I'd found yesterday — that patch of weeds? That was what this was about. It had been like this ever since Ocheong Yowang's chat popped up.

— Ocheong Yowang

IT DROPPED!!!

"What dropped?"

— Taehyeon Jin-in

Child, go take a closer look at that flower field.

At Taehyeon Jin-in's word, I approached the flower field. The viewers erupted in cheers.

⭐ Top Comment

— Taehyeon Jin-in

Return-Void Herb!!! That is a Return-Void Herb, is it not?!

— Cheongi Gakju

Judging by the leaf patterns, it appears to be a full thirty thousand years old.

— Okhan Binghu

Is that not a True Void Flower over there? How can a True Void Flower exist in the Lower Realm?

— Taebaek Geomgun

If these old eyes have not failed me, the flower blooming in that corner is surely a Nine-Heavens Molten-Dao Bloom.

— Ocheong Yowang

Holy shit, there's Dao-Cloud Orchid carpeting the place too?

— Hyeolha Nojo

Immortal Spirit Ginseng's in there too?

They were all so excited they could barely type fast enough. It was like watching a hardcore fan finally lay eyes on their bias — boundless, overflowing affection, pouring out of the chat.

"Is that stuff good?"

— Ocheong Yowang

So we actually talked it over amongst ourselves, yeah?

"Talked it over? Talked what over?"

— Ocheong Yowang

A Lower-Realm trash mob coughing up Upper-Realm materials — we were all hyped, you know?

"Ah—"

So good loot drops, was that it?

— Ocheong Yowang

But the grotto you found... no, there's a whole spiritual herb field laid out right next to the cave?

"Spiritual herbs?"

Hmm. Over on their end, anything good got the "spirit" prefix, so I guessed that just meant good plants?

While I was still tilting my head over it, Taehyeon Jin-in cut in.

— Taehyeon Jin-in

Child. At your realm, those spiritual herbs are of no use to you whatsoever.

— Taebaek Geomgun

Exactly right! Besides, are you not already standing in grade-nine spiritual land or better? You would have no need of spiritual medicines either.

— Taehyeon Jin-in

Which is why I say this....

— Okhan Binghu

Could you not share those with us?

Ah— so they wanted me to pull the herbs and send them over?

They'd sounded so desperate I'd thought it was some enormous favor. It wasn't even that hard.

"Okay. I'll send them."

— Cheongi Gakju

You see! Did I not say the child's heart is so kind she would readily yield them?

— Okhan Binghu

Indeed. The child's nature is truly upright.

What's so hard about pulling some weeds and sending them over. If I needed some later, I could just go find more. The fifth floor alone was enormous.

"So should I just pull everything here and send it?"

— Cheongi Gakju

You must not! You must harvest only those I indicate, and with the utmost care.

After that, I just carefully harvested the spiritual herbs exactly as my masters told me to.

"This one?"

— Cheongi Gakju

No. That one needs to grow further. You must wait until the leaves increase.

"Then this one?"

— Cheongi Gakju

That one is fine. Dig around it so as not to damage it, and lift it carefully. It does not matter if soil still clings to it.

I picked them as instructed, divided them fairly, and sent them through the Celestial Net.

And that was why they were this happy right now? They all seemed ridiculously pleased.

Are they really that good? What's weirder is — how long has the Tower even been around, and thirty-thousand-year-old stuff is just sitting there?

◇◇◇◆◇◇◇

First Period

Sword Arts — Taebaek Geomgun

— Taebaek Geomgun

Your divine soul is excellent, and your talent for wielding divine sense is outstanding — but you still have a long way to go.

— Ocheong Yowang

Your CPU clock's high, but you're not exactly a flagship model

"Yes..."

— Taebaek Geomgun

As a rule, a Qi Refining cultivator cannot set a sword aloft with the art of sword-flight.

— Taebaek Geomgun

If you lean on artifacts like the Red Cloud Silk, your fundamentals may grow hollow — so let us first build those foundations properly.

"Yessir."

— Taebaek Geomgun

A cultivator gathers the energy of heaven and earth in the lower dantian and channels it through the upper dantian. ‍‍‌‌⁠⁠‌‍‍‌⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠‌‌‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠For sword cultivators in particular, training of the upper dantian is of the utmost importance.

— Taebaek Geomgun

For only when the Spirit Platform is clear and the divine sense is sharp as a sword does one reach the realm of Sword-Man Unity.

Hmm.... Upper dantian? Spirit Platform? Divine sense?

What was any of that supposed to mean?

— Ocheong Yowang

CPU only runs right when the battery's stuffed and the voltage is rock-steady

"Ah— right!"

— Taebaek Geomgun

Now. In any case, what I shall impart to you is a sword art called the Baekhwa Tangeomgyeol.

"The Baekhwa Tangeomgyeol?"

— Taebaek Geomgun

Indeed. It is a peerless art that other Qi Refining swordsmen would not dare so much as glance at — far too generous for you to be using, frankly.

— Taebaek Geomgun

It is a divine art that does not merely command the sword, but can weakly emit sword intent itself.

— Ocheong Yowang

You make 'em piss themselves and slap a debuff on 'em

"Ah!"

— Taebaek Geomgun

I must admit it stings a little that you understand the Monster King better than me.... Anyway! Breaking their momentum and dulling their movements — that is indeed sword intent.

"Ah— yes!"

— Taebaek Geomgun

I am taking you as a personal student as thanks for your help, so learn it well.

"Yes."

— Taebaek Geomgun

Then let us begin.

◇◇◇◆◇◇◇

Second Period

Ice Arts — Okhan Binghu

— Okhan Binghu

As you may gather from this lady's title, I was born with an Ice Spirit Root.

"Yes."

— Okhan Binghu

An Ice Spirit Root is, in origin, a mutated spirit root born of the fusion of water and wind roots.

"Water and wind?"

— Okhan Binghu

Just so. Had you possessed a Fire Spirit Root, the fire energy flowing through your meridians would have weakened the water-wind energy.

"Yes!"

— Okhan Binghu

It is an art one dare not covet if the spirit root does not match. The energies would clash, and you would fall into qi deviation, or your meridians would snap.

— Ocheong Yowang

It overheats and fries the motherboard

"Ah! Right!"

So in short, I could learn it because I had a Mixed Spirit Root? I had every attribute, so that was why I could learn it, I guessed?

— Okhan Binghu

Thus, the art suited to your present Qi Refining realm is an ice-element dharma art called the Frost-Condensing Mirror Scripture.

"The Frost-Condensing Mirror Scripture?"

— Okhan Binghu

It is an art that gathers frost energy in empty air to form a protective mirror.

A protective mirror — did that mean it reflected things?

— Okhan Binghu

The instant the mirror shatters, ice-crystal powder sprays in all directions, blinding the opponent and veiling their sight, while a killing wind slows their body.

"Ooh—"

— Okhan Binghu

This lady has sent you a pill — take it at once.

"Ah— yes!"

I checked the Celestial Net, and a pill had arrived.

It's warm, like it was just made.

— Okhan Binghu

Once you take the pill, your meridians will not be harmed by the cold.

I swallowed one as she'd said, and a warm rush of energy rolled through me....

It feels like drinking liquor?

Come to think of it, it had been ages since I'd had a drink. I wanted a drink.

— Okhan Binghu

Then we shall begin.

◇◇◇◆◇◇◇

Third Period

Elemental Arts — Taehyeon Jin-in

"This is hard."

Ugh. This was way too hard! My head was ringing! My head was busy, my body was busy —

— Taehyeon Jin-in

The child seems weary. If it is truly too much, shall we rest a moment?

— Okhan Binghu

What are you saying, Immortal? One must endure the pain and prepare, or disaster will follow!

— Taehyeon Jin-in

Child, though it is hard now, let us begin again for the sake of days to come.

Ugh. How long did I have to keep this up?

— Taehyeon Jin-in

This old man turned his stores inside out because the child said she needed them. Arts for a peculiar spirit root are of little use unless one has occasion to wield them, you see.

"Uh.... um..."

— Taehyeon Jin-in

The arts you shall learn are the Diamond Art, the Lightning-Measure Art, the Water Orb Art, the Earth Wall Art, the Wind Blade Art, Palm-Heart Thunder, and the Radiant Fire Art.

"Pardon?"

Why were there so many? Hey! He'd been being all nice and then he suddenly floored it!

"You want me to learn all of these at once?"

— Taehyeon Jin-in

Do you not possess a Mixed Spirit Root that holds the Five Elements and even their mutations?! This old man went to a great deal of trouble finding these.

The fact that no chat came after that... that was my cue to butter him up, wasn't it? That was what this was?

"Th... thank you, Grandfather."

— Taehyeon Jin-in

That's my child. The principle of heaven and earth lies in mutual generation and mutual conquest. If you lay the foundation of All Arts Returning to One, it will be of great help hereafter.

— Ocheong Yowang

RAM: the more the merrier

"Yes."

— Taehyeon Jin-in

Then we shall begin.

◇◇◇◆◇◇◇

Fourth Period

Demonic Arts — Hyeolha Nojo

— Hyeolha Nojo

Brat. Must be rough, trying to keep up with all that rigid training.

"Uh.... no. I can manage, though."

— Hyeolha Nojo

Why go looking for hardship? Walk the demonic path and you wouldn't have to waste all that effort.

"Uh.... is that so?"

— Hyeolha Nojo

Check the Celestial Net first.

I checked the Celestial Net, and inside was a jade vial no bigger than my palm. I opened the lid, and a pitch-black liquid gave off a vile stench.

Was this poison?

"What is this?"

— Hyeolha Nojo

That's Nine Nether Dark Water. Learn the art, then smear it on your hands.

"It looks like poison. Are you sure I should put this on?"

— Hyeolha Nojo

If you don't learn the art first, ‍‍‌‌⁠⁠‌‍‍‌⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠‌‌‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠you'll die, obviously.

"Ah."

— Hyeolha Nojo

Don't worry. With an art called the Bone-Dissolving Technique, you just gather the energy once and you're done.

"Gather it?"

— Hyeolha Nojo

That's right. A secret art that melts an opponent's meridians, blood, and flesh in an instant.

"Hwaa..."

It melted people?

— Hyeolha Nojo

When some high-realm bastard lets his guard down, you just rest your hand on him — even his Dharma robes will melt away without a trace.

He did say he was a demonic patriarch... this did feel a bit cheap, though.

— Hyeolha Nojo

After that, once you learn the Blood Combat Art and the Spirit Concealment Art, that should cover roughly everything you can learn at your realm.

"But it looks just as hard as what the others are teaching me."

— Hyeolha Nojo

I'm telling you, once you learn it, it's easy.

"Yes..."

— Hyeolha Nojo

Then we begin.

◇◇◇◆◇◇◇

Fifth Period

Spirit Script — Cheongi Gakju

— Cheongi Gakju

What I shall teach you are the fundamentals of Spirit Script.

"Spirit Script?"

And here I'd thought he said English....

— Cheongi Gakju

Just so. To handle and comprehend Spirit Script — that, I would say, is the proper path to walking the way of cultivation in safety.

"Why do you say it's safe?"

— Cheongi Gakju

Because alchemy is extremely expensive.

"Ah..."

— Ocheong Yowang

For real, alchemy addicts are basically gambling addicts — their brains are pickled in dopamine

"Huh? But I started with alchemy, though?"

— Cheongi Gakju

Do you not have other great experts watching over you? Unless one is a true-transmission disciple of a great sect — no, even then, it is impossible for a Qi Refining cultivator to receive the protection of an Immortal Realm great expert.

"Ah— so I just got lucky, then."

— Cheongi Gakju

Fortune, too, is a form of talent. In any case, if you merely grasp the fundamentals of Spirit Script, you will have laid the groundwork for Formation Arts, Artifact Refinement, and Talisman Crafting.

"Ah— yes!"

— Cheongi Gakju

Of those, if I were to name the foremost, it would of course be Formation Arts.

"Why formations?"

— Cheongi Gakju

Even though my realm is lacking, the reason I can stand beside the great experts is that I have layered a formation-within-formation — the Grotto-Guardian Grand Formation — over my grotto, fold upon fold.

"Grotto-Guardian Grand Formation? Formation-within-formation?"

— Cheongi Gakju

It refers to a defensive formation in which multiple formations are installed within a formation. If one enters without permission, they must face my arrays.

— Ocheong Yowang

You think I couldn't punch through that?

— Cheongi Gakju

Monster King, please restrain yourself.

— Ocheong Yowang

I'll let it slide this once

— Cheongi Gakju

As you can see, once you grasp the principle of formation-within-formation — overlaying array upon array — even a high-realm cultivator will hesitate.

"Ah—"

— Cheongi Gakju

In any case, I have sent the materials for laying your foundations through the Celestial Net.

I opened the Celestial Net to find it packed with countless daggers, tools that looked like carving knives, a jar, a red powder, spirit charcoal, and jade slips.

"What is all this?"

— Cheongi Gakju

The daggers are mortal artifacts produced by the artifact refiners of this realm. The rest are a Spirit Engraving Knife, fiend-beast blood, Fire Spirit Sand, and spirit charcoal.

A Spirit Engraving Knife, huh.

It's got the "spirit" prefix, so that's the core item, then.

"I have to use all of this?"

— Cheongi Gakju

Just so. You inject spiritual power into the Spirit Engraving Knife and carve grooves into the dagger according to the Spirit Script diagram.

"Yes."

— Cheongi Gakju

Then you soak the dagger in a medicinal solution of fiend-beast blood mixed with Fire Spirit Sand in the proper ratio, and let it steep.

"Yes!"

— Cheongi Gakju

Lastly, you light the spirit charcoal, place the dagger within, ‍‍‌‌⁠⁠‌‍‍‌⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠‌‌‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠and infuse spiritual power to heat it through.

"Yes."

— Cheongi Gakju

If the formation script has been properly engraved, the dagger will come to hold fire energy of its own accord.

"Hold it?"

— Ocheong Yowang

Fire-attribute item enchant

"The dagger does fire attacks?"

— Ocheong Yowang

Yep

Ooh. That had a nice fantasy ring to it. I liked it.

— Cheongi Gakju

Then we shall begin.

◇◇◇◆◇◇◇

Sixth Period

Body Refinement — Ocheong Yowang

— Ocheong Yowang

I got nothing?

"Oh, is that so?"

— Ocheong Yowang

Yeah, you probably don't need it right now

— Taehyeon Jin-in

It would indeed be of little help to a cultivator.

— Taebaek Geomgun

Child. There is no need for you to learn the Monster King's techniques.

— Ocheong Yowang

What? You little shit?

— Okhan Binghu

Monster King, please do not take it to heart. Does the child not still have a great deal to learn?

— Ocheong Yowang

I'll hold back. This once.

I put on a somewhat disappointed face, but honestly it felt like I'd been dragged back from the brink of death. Especially the Artifact Refinement Cheongi Gakju had taught me — that had been insanely hard. He'd kept telling me to inject spiritual power, and it felt like the strength was just draining straight out of my body. Like I'd hauled a hundred sacks of cement.

Honestly I wanted to collapse right then and there — so I guessed it was a blessing there was no next lesson?

— Okhan Binghu

Child. You have finished today's lessons, so go into the grotto and begin your breathing cultivation.

"Again?"

— Okhan Binghu

Yes. You must reach the peak before you can step up to Foundation Establishment, must you not?

— Ocheong Yowang

Max level

"Ugggh—"

It had taken a fortnight just to climb to the fifth floor last time, hadn't it? So that meant two more weeks of this hell?

— Okhan Binghu

Let us practice what you learned today again tomorrow as well.

Haa. I just wanted to get out of the Tower.

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I've Become an Exam Student

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