This Was Not What I Had in Mind
I never expected this.
I never expected this.
Alduin's hunting skills were improving day by day.
At first, it was just one rabbit.
Then, birds and rabbits.
Next, a young boar.
Then, deer.
Then, wolves.
And a few days later, the little one started changing the way he brought me his catch.
At first, he would toss it in front of the cabin.
When I opened the door each morning, I would find the scent of blood and a neatly laid-out pile of animal carcasses.
I would stand there frozen, gripping the door handle for a long time before slowly patting Alduin's head.
"Well done."
With just that one word, the little one would wag his tail.
Thud.
Thud.
At first the sound only shook the floor a little.
After a few days, the dirt would fly.
Soon, the cooking utensils hanging on the cabin wall would tremble lightly.
By then, I would raise my hand first whenever Alduin looked happy.
"Easy."
"Krruk?"
"Tail. Easy."
Alduin would look back at his own tail.
And then at me again.
After that, even if he was happy, he would only wag the very tip of his tail.
Tap.
Tap.
That small consideration was so touching that when I stroked his head, the little one felt even better.
Then he would try to wag his tail big and wide.
I would say it again.
"Easy."
"Krruk……."
Alduin would droop his tail onto the floor with a dejected face.
Every time I saw that face, I felt bewildered.
His body was growing bigger every single day.
His scales were hardening.
His horns were lengthening.
And his teeth were turning sharp and gleaming white.
Every time his claws scraped the ground, the dirt would dig deep.
Even when his wings were folded, they would cover the entire back.
Yet what he did was still that of a child who wanted praise.
When my hand reached above his head, he would close his eyes.
When he waited for food, he would sit quietly.
When scolded, he would lower his head.
Every morning he would bring me his catch, set it down in front of me, sparkle with golden eyes, and wag his tail.
It was touching.
It was really touching.
The problem was that the scale of that touch was growing bigger and bigger.
"Alduin."
"Krruk?"
"I said one rabbit is fine."
In front of me lay two deer and one boar.
Alduin was sitting beside them.
His body, grown even bigger than yesterday, was crouching in the clearing, chest puffed out as if proudly showing off his accomplishment.
"……How are we supposed to eat all this?"
"Krruk."
"I didn't say bring a lot."
"Krruk?"
"You're just pretending to understand."
Alduin tilted his head.
That calm face made me speechless.
I raised one finger.
"One."
Then two.
"Even two is too many."
I spread my fingers wide and pointed at the pile of catches.
"This is too much."
Alduin stared at my fingers for a long time.
And then at the pile.
And back at my hand.
His pupils narrowed as he thought.
I looked at that face and felt a little hopeful.
Finally, he was getting it.
Finally, my lessons were taking hold.
And the next morning, Alduin brought back just one deer.
Exactly one deer.
The problem was that the deer was three times larger than a normal one.
"……"
"Krruk."
"Did you think it was just one?"
"Krruk!"
Alduin answered confidently.
I looked back and forth between the bloodied giant deer and the black hatchling sitting proudly beside it.
And very slowly I covered my face with my hand.
"It's not enough that the number matches."
"Krruk?"
"We have to look at the size too."
Alduin looked at the deer.
And at himself.
And at me.
And made a face that said he wasn't very big.
At that moment I realized.
Alduin's standard was also growing with his body.
At first, even a rabbit was a big catch.
When he was still a puppy, a deer was a surprising catch.
When he was just a tiger, a boar and wolf were things to brag about.
Now a single deer felt small to him.
I squatted beside the deer and sighed.
The scent of blood reached my nose.
Alduin lowered his head beside me.
His white horns sparkled in the sunlight.
Those horns had grown noticeably in just a few days.
At first, they were only like fingernails.
Then one finger length.
Then the length of a palm.
Now they reached my forearm.
The tip curled slightly backward, and thin golden patterns spread from the base.
The scales had changed too.
At first they were soft and black.
With a faint dark blue sheen underneath.
Now every scale looked like tiny armor.
When the sunlight hit, a deep blue color swirled over the black, and thin red light skimmed the edges whenever they moved.
At night, it was even more striking.
With the light of the stove, when Alduin curled up, a charcoal-like glow breathed slowly from beneath his scales.
Every time I saw it, I thought the same thing.
The stage of calling him a lizard was long gone.
"……Now no one can deny he's a dragon."
At my words, Alduin raised the scales that looked like ears.
"Krruk?"
"Was that meant as praise?"
"Krruk."
"Half right."
I reached out and knocked on his forehead.
Tock.
Tock.
Alduin closed his eyes.
Grrrr.
A low rumble came from inside his throat.
When he was little, it sounded like a cat purring.
Now even that sound alone made the ground tremble lightly.
The air rumbled low, and the surrounding grass swayed.
I felt the vibration on my palm and fell silent for a moment.
It had not even been a month since I had been living with this little one.
When we first met, his legs were tangled in vines and he could not even turn over.
When he was startled by his own flames, he bit his tongue.
When he drank water, he created steam at his nose.
When he ate, he had to learn how to hold his breath first.
He tried to eat my hair.
He slept with my chest as a pillow.
He wagged his tail at one word of praise.
All of that had happened only a short while ago.
Yet now this little one sat in front of me with a body the size of a house.
Exactly a little shorter than the cabin.
When he sat, his head reached about the height of the roof edge.
If he stood straight, he would be able to look down at the cabin.
It had been a long time since he could not enter through the cabin door.
At first his horn got caught on the door frame.
Then his shoulder.
Next, even raising his head made the wall creak.
Now he only peeked his head out the window.
At night, the little one curled up in the clearing beside the cabin.
He wrapped his tail around it like a house and spread one wing near the roof to block the wind.
At first I was the one taking care of Alduin.
Now Alduin was guarding the cabin.
That fact was strange.
And a little scary.
"You're growing too fast."
"Krruk."
"You grow fast, hunt fast, and learn fast."
Alduin lowered his head slightly as if he understood.
I placed my hand on his snout.
It was much wider than my palm.
It was hot and hard.
Whenever he breathed out, heat moved under my fingertips.
Puu.
This time there was no wheezing sound.
That was also a change.
Before, even just breathing made him cough.
Now he released long breaths very steadily.
A faint flame scent lingered in his breath.
A mixture of dry firewood, heated stones, and old ashes.
"At first you couldn't even breathe properly."
"Krruk."
"Now if you breathed fire, the hill over there would blow away."
Alduin looked at the hill beyond the forest.
And slightly opened his mouth.
I immediately pressed my palm over his snout.
"Don't."
"Krruk?"
"Don't do it for real."
Alduin obediently closed his mouth.
A small wisp of smoke came out from his nose.
Puush.
I looked at that smoke and sighed lightly.
Now Alduin's flames were no joke.
A few days ago.
I was moving firewood when my hand got injured.
A thorn had pierced deep into my palm and a little blood came out.
When Alduin saw that, he suddenly panicked.
His golden eyes narrowed and flames boiled inside his throat.
Before I could even say I was fine, he turned his head and spat fire toward the edge of the forest.
Hwaaaah.
It was no longer small flames.
The air burned hot as if torn, and the old rocks at the forest edge glowed red.
A few dry trees were engulfed in flames in an instant.
Instead of grabbing my water bucket and running, I first knocked on Alduin's neck.
"Stop!"
Only then did Alduin cut off his breath.
Fortunately the fire was extinguished before it spread.
But melted marks still remained on the rock surface.
After that, I taught Alduin the most important lesson.
He should not breathe fire anywhere just because I got hurt.
He should not breathe fire even if I fell.
He should not breathe fire even if I sneezed.
He should not breathe fire even if I was hungry.
Alduin listened to that lesson quite seriously.
But because it was too serious, now if my finger was even slightly cut, he would first glance at the forest as if the forest were the real culprit.
"Don't look at me with those eyes."
"Grrrr……."
"The trees are innocent."
"Krruk."
"Don't just answer. Loosen your eyes."
Alduin slowly made his eyes round.
Looking at that, I could not help but laugh.
A house-sized dragon making his eyes round and watching my every move.
What kind of expression would the original protagonist Lord Eyaje have made if he had seen this scene.
He would have lowered his sword even if there was a civil war in the kingdom.
I shook my head while preparing to cut the deer.
It was better not to think about the original protagonist.
I had no intention of getting entangled.
I wanted to live quietly, far from the capital, the palace, the nobles, and war.
That plan had not yet been abandoned.
But now there was a house-sized dragon beside the cabin.
"Ha. It's not quiet anymore."
"Krruk?"
"I didn't say anything."
Alduin tilted his head.
When that huge head tilted to the side, the tip of his horn brushed a branch.
Tap.
The branch snapped.
Alduin looked at the broken branch in surprise.
And at me.
"Krruk……."
"It's okay. It's just a branch."
The little one was still watching me.
I chuckled and waved my hand.
"Instead, don't touch the cabin."
"Krruk."
"Especially the roof."
Alduin looked at the cabin roof.
And very carefully lowered his body.
Recently the little one had begun to be conscious of his own size.
When he first became house-sized, he would cause accidents every time he moved.
He knocked down the firewood pile with his tail.
He broke the clothesline with his wing.
He scratched the eaves with his horn.
Once, while yawning, a spark from his mouth caught the grass.
When I stared at him silently, Alduin froze.
And that whole day he sat quietly in the corner of the clearing, watching my every move.
After that, his movements changed.
Near the cabin, he lowered his feet slowly.
His tail curled beside his body.
His wings folded as much as possible.
He breathed from above.
That appearance was cute.
At the same time it was weird.
This huge creature was trying not to break my small cabin.
I laid the deer down in the backyard of the cabin.
Cutting it was now familiar.
At first, even one rabbit made my stomach turn.
Now, even looking at a deer, my hands moved first.
I removed the blood, peeled the skin, divided the meat, and separated the parts to dry and the parts to eat immediately.
The worry about food supply decreased.
Thanks to Alduin.
No, the form of worry about food changed.
Before, there was not enough to eat and I worried.
Now I had to process it before it spoiled because too much had been brought.
"Alduin."
"Krruk?"
"Bring only as much as this today."
I pointed at the meat I was cutting.
"Tomorrow is rest."
"Krruk?"
"Hunt rest."
Alduin lowered the scales that looked like ears.
His expression became very serious.
I narrowed my brows at his reaction.
"Why. Do you like hunting that much?"
"Krruk……."
The little one hesitated for a moment and then lowered his head toward me.
His huge snout touched the side of my shoulder.
I could not raise my bloodied hand, so I gently pushed his cheek with my elbow.
"It got blood on it."
Alduin did not back away.
Instead, he let out a very small sound.
That sound was similar to the one I had heard when we first met in the forest.
"Sey…… fooo……."
I stopped my hand.
It had been a long time since I heard that pronunciation.
At first I thought it meant hungry.
I still did not know the exact meaning.
But now I understood it intuitively.
It was not just hunger in that word.
A calling for me.
A wish that I would not disappear.
Impatience to show that he was useful.
Alduin brought his catch.
So that I could eat it.
So that I would not starve.
So that I would praise him.
So that he could confirm he was allowed to be here.
When that thought came, my fingertips paused for a moment.
"You."
Alduin looked at me.
His golden pupils did not tremble.
I tapped Alduin's snout on the inside of my clean wrist.
"I know."
"Krruk?"
"You're useful. Quite."
Alduin's eyes widened a little.
"You don't have to hunt."
"Krruk……?"
"You can live here without bringing your catch."
Alduin seemed not to understand all the meanings.
But he understood my voice.
I spoke more slowly.
"You won't be abandoned."
At that moment Alduin stopped moving.
The rumble inside his throat stopped.
Only the wind of the forest could be heard.
I accidentally coughed.
"So tomorrow is rest."
Alduin looked at me for a long time.
And very carefully lowered his head.
"Krruk……."
A low answer.
I continued cutting the meat.
Why was my face so hot.
I did not say anything particularly great, yet strangely it was embarrassing.
Alduin lay down beside me.
His house-sized body lay long in one corner of the clearing.
His tail curled away from the cabin to the opposite side, and his wings folded gently over his body.
The little one quietly watched my cutting.
Sometimes a small bird would land on a nearby branch, see Alduin, and fly away immediately.
Alduin did not chase that bird.
It seemed he had really decided to rest from hunting.
It was a little unexpected.
"You listen well."
"Krruk."
"It's touching, but the problem is that you're too big."
Alduin raised his head.
"That's what I'm talking about."
"Krruk?"
"You can't say anything with that face."
I prepared to hang the venison in the sunlight.
I hung a rope in a sunny place and hung the salted meat long.
Alduin watched the process with interest.
Occasionally he stuck out his tongue.
I immediately said,
"Don't lick."
Alduin put his tongue back in.
"Good."
He tried to move his tail.
I immediately raised my hand.
"Easy."
The tail wagged slowly.
Tap.
Tap.
It was cute.
I never thought a house-sized body would be so absurdly cute wagging its tail gently.
Then, as the sun was starting to slope, strange sounds came from the opposite side of the forest.
The birds flew up all at once.
I stopped my hand that was hanging the meat.
Alduin's pupils narrowed.
The air changed.
The little one who had been lying down quietly began to slowly raise his body.
Just that movement made the surrounding grass press down.
The ground rumbled low.
Thud.
Thud.
Alduin looked inside the forest.
Low flames boiled inside his throat.
Grrrrr.
"Alduin."
At my call, the little one's ears moved slightly.
But his gaze did not leave the forest.
I picked up my knife.
Something was moving between the branches.
It was a large beast.
Far larger than a normal deer or boar.
Black fur.
Thick shoulders.
Curved tusks.
A giant wild boar appeared between the trees.
There were several old wounds on its back.
One eye was blind, and dirt and blood were on the corner of its mouth.
Normally, animals would run away upon smelling Alduin's scent.
But this one was different.
Perhaps it had lost its territory, or it was starving, or it was already crazy.
The wild boar scraped the ground.
Puuu.
Its rough breath flowed out.
I tightened my grip on the knife.
"Alduin."
This time I called it a little lower.
"Cabin."
At that one word, Alduin moved.
Instead of blocking in front of me, he stood between the cabin and me.
He spread one wing halfway, blocking my view.
Black scales rose like walls.
The wild boar charged.
The ground shook.
I swallowed my breath.
Alduin did not move.
In the final moment, his front paw pressed the ground.
Thud.
Dirt flew up.
And his tail moved.
Fast and low.
Thwack.
The wild boar's body bent sideways.
The giant beast hit the tree as is.
Crack.
The bark broke.
The wild boar tried to stand up again.
Alduin lowered his head.
Flame light leaked from the corner of his mouth.
Hwahk.
I shouted immediately.
"Don't burn!"
Alduin stopped.
The flames that had been boiling inside his throat subsided.
Instead, the little one raised his front paw and pressed the wild boar's neck.
A short struggle.
Then silence.
The forest became quiet again.
I breathed out only after a long time.
Alduin stood on the wild boar and looked at me.
As if asking a question.
This much is fine.
I lowered my knife.
"Well done."
With those words, Alduin's eyes relaxed.
"Krruk."
"Not breathing fire was also well done."
Alduin became even happier.
But his tail wagged carefully.
Tap.
Tap.
I looked at the wild boar.
I needed to check if it was unconscious or dead.
Unlike the catches Alduin usually brought, this time it was the animal that had charged first.
Still, the result was the same.
Alduin was no longer in the same category as the forest beasts.
After he became a tiger, now that he was house-sized, no forest beast could match him.
Even without using fire.
"It's not even been a month since we started living together."
I muttered.
Alduin tilted his head.
"Aren't you too powerful?"
"Krruk?"
"Don't make that face. Praise half, worry half."
I walked beside Alduin's front paw.
His claws easily pressed down on the thick neck of the wild boar.
That strength was now clearly visible.
With just a little force wrong, the cabin, trees, and rocks would break.
His breath did not even need to be said.
This child was becoming a breathing disaster.
Yet in front of me, the little one was still watching my every move.
If I scolded him for bringing too much catch, he lowered his head.
If I pointed out he wagged his tail too hard, he was careful.
If I got hurt, he looked at the forest.
If I was hungry, he hunted.
If I said he did well, his golden eyes sparkled.
I stood leaning against Alduin's leg and placed my palm on the scales.
The hot feeling seeped into my palm.
His heart was beating underneath the scales.
Thump.
Thump.
Thump.
It was the same rhythm as the small beats I felt in my palm at first.
Only the size had changed.
"Alduin."
"Krruk?"
"Your growth speed is too fast."
"Krruk."
"Don't pretend to understand."
"Krruk?"
"Still."
I stopped talking for a moment.
There was still the scent of blood in the forest.
Meat was hanging to dry on the cabin.
And a house-sized dragon was standing in the clearing.
An existence that did not exist in the original story was here.
And I called the name of that existence.
"You grew well anyway."
Alduin's eyes widened greatly.
Then very slowly he lowered his head.
His huge head came down right in front of me.
I chuckled and stroked his snout.
"You grew well, but don't get any bigger tomorrow."
"Krruk."
"I can't believe that answer."
Alduin wagged his tail carefully.
Tap.
Tap.
The sun began to slope.
Red light settled on Alduin's black scales.
The little one's body created a long shadow behind the cabin.
That shadow was bigger than the house.
The small lizard I had first met could now scare away forest beasts just with that shadow.
But to me, the appearance of the first day still overlapped.
His short legs that tangled in vines and struggled.
The face that bit its tongue when startled by its own flames.
The voice that made strange sounds when hungry.
The belly that would rumble when I lifted it on my palm.
Because those memories remained, I could not fully fear the little one.
I knew I should fear him.
I knew that the situation itself where a house-sized dragon wagged its tail carefully at my one word was dangerous.
But.
"Tonight's dinner is boar."
"Krruk!"
"Mouth."
Alduin immediately closed his mouth.
Puush.
The smoke dispersed between the evening light.
I looked at that and shook my head.
"You're really a dragon now."
Alduin blinked with a face that did not understand the words.
And waited for my hand to come up again.
Finally I patted his snout once more.
Tock.
Tock.
"A wonderful disaster."
Alduin understood that as praise.
Grrrr.
A low rumble spread from his house-sized body.
The cabin window trembled slightly.
I looked at the windows, at Alduin, and back at the windows.
"Easy."
"Krruk……."
Alduin lowered the rumble.
I sighed and laughed.
In less than a month, my first child had become a dragon that no one could deny.
And that dragon still, whenever I stroked his head, made the happiest face in the world.