I'll Love You
"Ah... Athena..?"
Unlike my own wretched self, she carried an air of radiant, lofty grace. When she lit the lamp in the room, the dazzling light stung my eyes.
"Ugh.."
While I frowned and shielded my face with my hand, she came right up to me and looked down with an oddly chilling expression.
"....Did you cry?"
I could see my own reflection in her brilliant golden eyes. That pathetic, worthless version of myself. I didn't want Athena to see me like this, so I tried to lower my head—but her hand caught my chin and lifted it, leaving me no choice.
"Hera, why were you crying?"
"....."
"Hera."
Her intense gaze demanded an answer, and though it frightened me, my lips simply would not open. Of all people, I didn't want to tell her. That I had cried because I was such a fool. Because I was pathetic. Because I was a useless human who only ever caused trouble for everyone around me.
In the end, unable to answer no matter how long she waited, I could only quietly close my eyes. Athena stared at me through the silence that followed, then finally let go of my chin.
"Haa..."
Her deep sigh made my heart sink hard.
...Athena must be frustrated with me too.
She was treating me kindly for now, but someday even she would grow sick of this side of me. What would happen then? Would I be thrown out of this mansion? Or would I truly fall into a life worse than a slave's?
The unknown future terrified me, yet I still didn't want to lean on her. If even she started looking at me with pity, I truly wouldn't have the strength to stand back up again.
I'd rather just—
"This won't do, Hera."
"Hyaak?!"
While I was lost in thought, Athena seized my body in an instant and lifted me up. Still holding me, she sat on the bed and laid me face-down across her lap.
It was a position I'd seen somewhere before.
Huh..?
It looked exactly like the way mothers disciplined their children.
"Uh... Athena..?"
"Alright. You're getting spanked until you answer."
She smiled sweetly and raised her hand high.
Smack—
"Heut?!"
A hot sting bloomed across my lower half. When I turned my head slightly, I saw her palm resting on my bottom.
Smack—
"Ha-eup?!"
Another shock hit before I could even grasp the situation. Unexpected pain brought tears welling in my eyes.
"This is your punishment for ignoring your master's question. I won't stop until you answer properly."
"W-wait..!"
Smack—
"Hyaak!"
Every time her palm struck me, the pain seemed to grow sharper.
"I-it's too hard... a little sof-softer!"
"Answer me, Hera. Why were you crying?"
"Uuu... that's.."
Smack—
"Heuuk!"
"...From now on I'll just keep hitting you. Speak up when you feel like answering."
And so the room that had been endlessly quiet filled for a long while with the sound of flesh striking flesh and one woman's sobs.
"Heuk... p-please stop.."
Smack—
"I-it hurts... heuk... hic.."
Smack—
"I-I'll talk..! I'll talk so please... stop..!"
Only then did Athena finally still her hand.
"Heuk... hic... it huuurts.."
My bottom burned as if it had been seared by fire, and the blanket pressed against my face was soaked through with my tears.
"There we go. Now hurry up and tell me. Why were you crying?"
The same hand that had spanked me without mercy was now gently stroking my bottom.
"Hic... b-because I'm such an idiot.."
"An idiot?"
"Because I only cause trouble for others... because I can't do anything on my own... I hated myself so much for being such a fool.."
"....."
"I hated myself and resented myself so much... that I cried.."
I had said it. Laid bare my shame. Like a little kid throwing a tantrum.
I was scared to look at Athena's face. Would she scold me for crying over something so trivial? Or would she look at me with the same pitying eyes as the other maids?
But contrary to every expectation, she gave me a completely different answer.
She stopped rubbing my bottom, quietly sat me upright on her lap, and—
Chup—
—pressed a light kiss to my lips.
"....Huh?"
When I blinked blankly, Athena let out a soft snort of laughter and claimed my lips again.
"Ha-eup... mmm.."
Chup— tsuup
Our mouths tangled once more. Perhaps I had grown used to her kisses by now; my body accepted her without any real resistance. Athena savored my lips for a long while, then gave one last lingering suck before pulling away.
A faint flush had risen to her cheeks. For a moment a strange look passed between us—then Athena burst out laughing.
"Hera. Are you afraid of being a burden to others?"
She spoke while smoothing my disheveled hair.
"...Yeah.."
"Well... you do have a bit of a clumsy side, I won't deny it."
Thump—thump—
My heart began to pound hard.
So Athena really does...
Deep down she must have found me troublesome after all. The moment the fear I'd been holding finally surfaced, tears threatened to well up again.
I had to hold them back. If I cried again here, I'd look truly pathetic.
While I forced the tears down, Athena suddenly pulled me into a tight embrace.
"Eek."
"It's okay, Hera."
She patted my back as she continued.
"A burden? You can be as much of one as you want. I told you before. In this place, you can do whatever you like."
"....."
"I swear it. No matter how many accidents you cause. No matter how much other people look down on you."
Athena eased me back just enough so our eyes could meet. When I looked at her face, those intelligent golden eyes fixed on me were shining with a bright light.
"I, at least, will love you for the rest of my life."
".....Huh?"
"You're my slave, after all. Shouldn't a master take responsibility?"
As if handling a cute pet, she stroked my head with one hand and gently tickled under my chin with the other.
Love me... for life..?
Why didn't it feel bad to be treated like an animal? No—if anything, the sense that I was receiving her love slowly began to fill the empty place inside my chest.
"So from now on, don't go giving your affection to anyone else. I'll give you all the love you need."
"Rather than leaning on others only to get hurt like this... lean on your master who treasures you."
Lean on Athena. Was that really okay?
I was afraid. Afraid she would grow tired of me too. No matter how much I sometimes hated Athena, she was the only person in this place who still held any goodwill toward me. If even she turned her back on me, I truly would be alone, and that terrified me.
— Someone as useless as me doesn't deserve to be loved.
— She'll get sick of me soon enough too.
— I'm definitely going to be abandoned.
No matter how firmly I steeled my heart, imagination and reality were different things. I had prepared myself hundreds of times for the day she would reject me, yet I still didn't have the courage to hear those words from her own lips.
But contrary to all my delusions, she had said she would love me for life.
Wanting to confirm her sincerity one more time, I timidly caught the hem of her clothes with trembling fingers.
"R-really..? You'll... love me forever..?"
When I carefully looked up, her face looked as if she were holding something back.
".....I could just take you right now... no... never mind.."
She muttered something too quiet for me to catch, then quickly put on a smile and answered me.
"I swear it on my name. I am solely on your side."
Hearing her certainty, the tears I had been holding back began to spill again.
"....Heuk.."
Her promise that she would never abandon me settled into my withered chest as an enormous comfort. A single thread of light found in pitch-black darkness. As her warm presence wrapped gently around me, I slowly nestled deeper into her arms like a baby bird rushing to its mother.
"That's right... good girl, my Hera.."
"Th-they... heuk... hated me... alone... hic.."
She stroked me tenderly and spoke in a worried voice.
"...People can seem kind on the outside, but they can turn on you at any moment."
— So don't trust anyone but me.
Her final words drove themselves deep into my mind.
Yes. I didn't want to lean on others and get hurt anymore. Even if it was only one person, I just needed someone who would take my side and no one else's.
I looked up at her and softly opened my mouth.
"...Thank you.."
Hearing my gratitude, she smiled gently and wiped away my tears.
"....But there's one problem."
For a brief instant—a very brief instant—her expression seemed to turn cold.
"A-a problem..?"
My body trembled for no reason, and I instinctively burrowed deeper into her arms, seeking human warmth.
"Mm. I'm fine with you no matter what you're like. But this one thing bothers me."
That single thread of light that had come to me seemed to flicker as if it might go out at any moment. Desperate not to lose the comfort I had finally found, I hurriedly answered her.
"W-what is it?? Tell me... I-I'll fix it.."
Only then did she smile warmly at me again.
"I'm going to treasure you as my slave for the rest of my life and care for you with love."
When I looked at her with a desperate expression, she gazed quietly back at me before continuing.
"But you don't truly think of me as your master, do you?"
"A relationship that only flows one way is bound to break eventually..."
My mind went blank for a moment.
Slave. I had become her slave. But it had only ever been a forced contract. Just as she said, I had never sincerely accepted this relationship. If anything, my resentment toward her had been stronger than any loyalty.
She was the one who had torn my beloved ones away from me and dragged me here against my will. Deep in my heart, hatred for her had always been nestled there.
"Hera. Do you truly think of me as your master?"
I couldn't give any answer to her words.
Master...? Athena?
I didn't know. I was endlessly grateful to Athena for promising to treasure me for life. But the resentment I held toward her was still far too great for me to sincerely call her master.
I hated her. That feeling probably wouldn't disappear for a very long time. And yet, contradictorily, I also hoped she would never leave my side.
My head was a mess. I couldn't tell what my feelings toward Athena even were.
When no answer came from my lips for a long while, Athena let out a short sigh and rose from the bed.
"...Haa... Fine. Looks like I need to think about this a little myself."
The moment she turned her back on me and started to walk away, my heart began to pound violently.
This was the first time. Never before had Athena turned her back on me like this. As she grew farther and farther away, terror and anxiety began to seize my body again.
No. Don't abandon me.
I scrambled off the bed in a panic and ran toward her—
Whump—
—and threw my arms around her from behind, clinging tight so she couldn't get any farther away.
"D-don't go.... please.."
At my words she stopped short for a moment, then slowly turned her head toward me. Her expression was cold, yet for the briefest instant—
I thought I saw it.
I must have been mistaken...
It had to be my imagination. That before she fully turned, a tiny smile had been resting on her face.