The Desperate Dash to Save Neukdori!

Neukdori was our wolf rug bed. Elma Bronzebeer flung off her robe with a flourish. Splash! "Kyahaha! It's warm! Feels so good!" She buried herself in the bubbles.

"Darling, hurry up!"

"Got it. Coming right in."

I stripped off my robe and slipped into the tub. Warm water. Soft bubbles. It really did feel great.

"Darling, where are you? I can't see you!" Elma parted the bubbles and scooted over.

"Right here."

"Hehe. Gotcha."

Slippery bare skin. Her flesh felt even more taut and supple.

"This is niiice…."

Elma rubbed her cheek against my chest. Up to this point, it was perfect. Absolutely perfect.

"Let's make more bubbles!" Squish. Elma finally hit the whirlpool button.

At max power, no less. Bubble bubble bubble!Whoosh! Jets of water erupted.

The already foam-saturated tub began swelling like it was about to explode.

"Huh? Wh-what?!" The bubbles surged past Elma's crown, right up to my chin.

"Pbbt! Ptui! Wh-what's going on?!"

A panicked yelp. But I couldn't see her. The white foam had swallowed her whole.

"Elma?!"

"Daaarling!! Glug glug! Ow, my eyes sting!"

Elma had lost all sense of direction. Only the sounds of her flailing filled the air.

"Mayday! Mayday! Compass malfunction! Compass malfunction!"

"Stay still!"

I swung my arm. My fingers tangled in hair. I yanked boldly.

Pop.

"Pwah!"

I hauled her up like pulling a radish. Her face was a total bubble mess. Like Santa's beard.

"Kehk. Th-this is an assassination attempt! A eugenics conspiracy to exterminate tiny folks like me!"

"You just dumped in too much bubble bath."

"No way! It's cheap crap bubble bath!"

Elma squeezed her eyes shut and wailed. Those eugenicists again.

"Eek! My eyes sting! Wash me!"

And so, romance went down the drain. I pulled Elma onto my lap and sprayed her with the handheld shower.

Shooo… The foam rinsed away. Glossy pale skin slick with water. Her petite, bouncy figure emerged.

"Ugh… my eyes hurt…."

Elma whined, burying her face in my chest. I rinsed the last of the bubbles. Stroked her shoulders. Ran my hand down her back. Patted her butt.

Who cared about the night view? My mind was shot.

Still. The tiny warmth nestled against me wasn't half bad.

"You okay?"

"Ugh…. But you washing me makes it a little better."

Elma flashed a soggy grin. She looked like a drowned rat. Adorable, so I'd let it slide. For real.

==============================

After the bath, we settled by the window. Seoul's night skyline twinkled.

Elma, naturally, on my lap. She sipped some wine. Expensive vintage. Over five ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠million won a bottle, I heard.

"Ugh! What a bland swill!"

"I think it's great."

"Real booze lets you feel it scorch down to your gut…."

"Y-yeah."

Classic dwarf trait. I hugged Elma close, sharing body heat. Soft, chewy. I kneaded her belly and thighs.

She neither stopped me nor egged me on. Just accepted it. Like it was the most natural thing.

A comfortable intimacy. After a moment, Elma spoke up.

"It's nice and all. But home's still better."

"Yeah?"

Elma looked up. Bonk. Her little crown tapped my solar plexus.

Almond eyes gazed at me. Sleepily curved.

"It's full of our memories."

"…."

"The lab where we got married is right above. Artificial beach. Pajamas you bought me."

Elma clutched my forearm. Rubbed her cheek against it.

"And Neukdori."

Neukdori. Our wolf pelt rug we always slept on. Elma's quirky taste turned it into our bed.

"Hugging you on Neukdori is the best."

My heart went all fluffy. How could I not love this tiny, lovable woman?

"Me too. Neukdori's the best."

"Right? You get me so…."

Suddenly. Elma froze mid-sentence. Her pupils shook violently.

"…Huh?"

"What's wrong?"

"…W-wait a sec."

Elma's face drained white.

"I told them to gut the whole place… right?"

"Yeah?"

"Flooring too… total replacement…."

Ominous feeling.

"Forget something?"

"…We're screwed."

Elma clawed at her hair.

"I forgot! They ignore unprogrammed orders! Th-they might've tossed Neukdori!"

Shock. Our precious memories headed for the trash heap.

No way.

"Call 'em quick and stop it!"

"R-right!"

Elma fumbled for her tablet PC. Trembling fingers tapped the screen.

Golem control app launched.

"Hurry! Hurry!"

"Aaaah!!"

Elma screamed and slammed the tablet down.

"Damn it! Why won't it work?!"

"What's wrong?"

"Those idiot tin cans must've smashed the relays during construction!"

Communications blackout. Furious, Elma hurled the tablet aside.

"We gotta go!"

She grabbed my wrist and yanked.

"To save ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠Neukdori!"

"Now?"

"When I say go, go! Neukdori might die!"

Flames flickered in Elma's eyes. Her white robe whipped wildly.

===================================

On the road. An SUV tore through the night streets.

"Move! All of you! Neukdori's in danger!"

Flash, flash! Elma blasted the high beams nonstop. She cut off cars left and right.

The speedometer and RPM gauge pointed at numbers no highway should ever see.

"E-Elma! Cameras! Speed cams!"

"Whatever! I'll pay the fine!"

Capitalist runaway train.

"Truck ahead! Truck!"

A dump truck loomed in front. Elma didn't flinch. She floored it.

"We'll crash!"

"It's fine! I modded it! It'll win even against a dump truck!"

"My heart can't take it!!!"

At my age, heart attack incoming.

Vroooom! We scraped past the truck. Side mirrors nearly kissed.

Cold sweat poured like rain. My soul screamed from far behind, chasing us.

"Urk… gonna puke…."

"Hold it! Save it for after we rescue Neukdori!"

Elma's eyes gleamed with madness. Her tiny hands wrenched the wheel.

Screech! Drift through the corner. Long skid marks trailed.

"Hang on, Neukdori! Mama's coming!"

Dwarf risking life for a rug. Problem was, my life was collateral.

I never signed up.

I squeezed my eyes shut. Praying my soul caught up safe.

==========================

Korea University somewhere. Secret entrance to Elma's underground parking.

Screeeeech!! The SUV slammed to a halt. Tire smoke billowed.

"Elevator! Emergency mode!"

"E-Elma, please…."

Before my plea ended. The elevator dragged us underground.

Like a drop tower at an amusement park.

"Urk…."

Regrettably. ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠My soul was still lagging at the Han River.

====================================

"Neukdooooori!!"

And we arrived home. Whirr!Crash!

The golems rampaged with tools. The house was a total wreck. Furniture piled in one living room corner.

And beside it. Heaps of 100-liter industrial trash ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠bags.

"Nooooooo!!!"

Elma dove into the trash pile. Tiny hands tore into bags.

Rustle, rip!

"Found it!"

She ripped out a black fur clump. Sleep mask on, pacifier in mouth—a bizarre wolf head.

Our Neukdori.

"Waaaah! Neukdori! Mama's sorry! Sorry I'm late!"

Elma hugged the pelt and bawled. Thank god. We made it in time.

Then Elma whipped her head around. Flash. Murderous glint in almond eyes.

"Hey, you tin can bastards!!"

Ear-shattering shout. Working golems froze.

"You dare stuff our precious Neukdori in trash bags? Wanna get sold as scrap?!"

Crackle. Blue fireball flared at Elma's fingertip. Air grew heavy. Ozone stung my lungs. High-mana aftershock. Even a normie like me choked on the pressure.

Clumsy as she seemed, top-tier mage for sure.

"Shut up! Use some common sense! It's our wedding gift full of memories with darling!"

Whoooosh! Elma huffed, swelling the fireball. Golems trembled and knelt.

Tiny golems. Elma with fire. Totally queenly…

"You just thought something weird, didn't you, darling?"

"Nope."

Sharp wife. Gotta watch my thoughts here. Rare's no good.

===============================

A scolding later. Deflated golems scattered.

I hugged Elma from behind.

"Good job. At least we saved it."

"Sniff… darling…."

Drained? She leaned limply into me. Clinging tight to the wolf pelt.

"If this was gone… I'd really die…."

"I know. Can't sleep without it anymore either."

Lame comfort. Still, Elma beamed. Snot-and-tear-streaked face.

=========================

Days later. Remodel done.

"Whoa…."

I craned my neck back. High ceiling. Open space. Forgot how refreshing 'proper height' felt after underground life.

"Whaddya think, darling? Like it?"

Elma puffed proudly. I stretched my hand up instead of answering. Even jumping on the spot—no touch.

"No more head bonks."

"Duh. Designed to handle 50cm growth spurt."

Elma snorted, chest out in pride.

"Won't happen, but."

"Oh? Impossible for me, but you could…."

Elma's almond eyes sparkled. Nope. That glint means insane solution. Body mods. Unproven drugs. Nuremberg Code? Helsinki? Pfft.

Strike first. Before she acts.

I jammed hands under her armpits. Whoosh.

"Huh? Kyaa..!"

Lifted her right up. Tiny legs dangled in the air.